Batman Vs. Slavery

[Zev]

Who would win?

[War Lord]

Is slavery a person or a concept?

[Herr Logan]

The Batman would win...

...with Prep Time. :up:

[GL-Corps#28]

He just needs the help of Dave Chappelle and the Time Haters.

[Zev]

Slavery the concept, as in the actual pre-Civil-War forced labor of blacks and the enslavement of the Jews by the Egyptians back in Biblical times.

[DarkKnightJRK]

Originally posted by GL-Corps#28
He just needs the help of Dave Chappelle and the Time Haters.

:batman::up:

[Zev]

I should make it clear that Batman has the Batcave, Batmobile, Batwing, Alfred, his choice of a Robin, and Ace the Bat-Hound. His opponant is represented through the 1800s Southern region of the United States. The North can neither assist or attack the Dark Knight and Lincoln is not currently President or in the running for President. Just to keep things neutral, the President is Taft (or a computer-generated hologram).

[Spoon]

Since Ace the Bat-Hound is the greatest detective in history (http://www.bat-hound.com/acegallery/images/batman097.jpg), I have to go with Batman.

[Herr Logan]

Haw!! :D

[Psycwarloch]

Batman

[Barbelith]

This might be the best thread I've seen in a while.
Quick, what other superhero vs. concept battles can we come up with?

-Superman vs. The Worker's Control of Factories
-The Flash vs. Evolution
-Aquaman vs. Global Warming

The possibilities are endless!

[Barbelith]

Originally posted by Spoon
Since Ace the Bat-Hound is the greatest detective in history (http://www.bat-hound.com/acegallery/images/batman097.jpg), I have to go with Batman.
Not only that, but Ace is a qualified drug-sniffing dog! How else could he have found Batman and Robin's underground meth lab?

[Zev]

Originally posted by Barbelith
This might be the best thread I've seen in a while.
Quick, what other superhero vs. concept battles can we come up with?

-Superman vs. The Worker's Control of Factories
-The Flash vs. Evolution
-Aquaman vs. Global Warming

The possibilities are endless!

Wolverine Vs. Homophobia! (http://www.superherohype.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=130092)

Doc Ock Vs. Sexual Discrimination Against Women In The Work Place! (http://www.superherohype.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=130174)

Dr. Doom Vs. Middle-Eastern Violence! (http://www.superherohype.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=130093)

[GL-Corps#28]

Green Lantern vs. Herpes!

[cryptic name]

????????????????????????????????????????????????

[jaguarr]

WTF? Strangest poll ever, Zev.

jag

[Zev]

Bump.

[MF60]

This is the funniest thing i have ever heard, lol.The Bat would win sure,but he could use the help of the Time Haters.

[P. Cushing]

"Doc Ock Vs. Sexual Discrimination Against Women In The Work Place! "
BWAHHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!

[Zev]

Originally posted by Oldman = Gordon
"Doc Ock Vs. Sexual Discrimination Against Women In The Work Place! "
BWAHHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!

What can I say, I'm the Willy Wonka of the Hype! Unfortunately, someone deleted or moved that thread from the Spider-Man forum.

[Herr Logan]

I would think Doctor Octopus, if he were inclined to take on that challenge in the first place, would deal with those guilty of sexual discrimination against women in the workplace in a similar fashion in which Wilson Fisk deals with henchmen who mention his wife-- swiftly and gratuitously.

How efficient would it be to be able to discipline four sexist *******s simulateously at any given moment?

[Zev]

Which brings us to an interesting question. If defeating slavery and sexual discrimination BOTH required the death of Aquaman (who is busy in his own losing battle with global warming), who would kill him first?

Doc Ock or Batman?

[Herr Logan]

The Batman doesn't kill, so Doctor Octopus.

Perhaps Aquaman commands octopi on a daily basis, but this one has a doctorate, and four hydraulic appendages full o' bad-ass.

[GL1]

Batman would kick Slavery's butt tho... he'd have everyone on earth repeating the second line of the U.S. Constitution preamble ad nauseum... IF he had prep time...

Flash and Evolution would be a good fight :)

What happened to Hulk vs The New Age Movement?

[Victor Von Doom]

This thread is weird

[Zev]

Originally posted by Victor Von Doom
This thread is weird

Originally posted by cryptic name
????????????????????????????????????????????????

Originally posted by jaguarr
WTF? Strangest poll ever, Zev.

jag

Everything is going according to plan...

[Sardaukar]

Batgod wins every time.

[Zev]

Originally posted by Sardaukar
Batgod wins every time.

Now now. Once you get gods into this, you get Bast. Which means CINO is not fat behind...

Until Thor makes her his *****.

[Zev]

"Do all man from the future mix fantastic iconic modern mythology characters and human rights issues?"

"Nope. Just me baby... Just me."

[AGL]

bump

[Zev]

Originally posted by AGL
bump

Finally, someone else does it!

[AGL]

Bump!

[Zev]

Yes! It's back!

We must consider the possibility of Batman's strategy. Knowing history and being only one man, the most surefire way to end slavery quickly is to run for President and win. I'd say Batman knows enough about history to take advantage of it.

However, Batman's job is twofold if and when he becomes president. Outlaw slavery AND keep the union intact without resorting to war if at all possible. That's a tall order...

[TheBlackTiger]

Id say Bats, all he has to do is set up a cotton franchise in a competing country which will help him corner the market in cotton, (taking away all the revenues from slave run cotton franchises) then, secretly fund a large underground railroad with routes directly to Mexico or Canada.

[Paradoxium]

This would be considered Batworld material - let you guys settle down a bit I guess before I move it, since you lost the Catwoman forums anyways. Everyone cool with that?

[raybia]

Is slavery a new comicbook hero?

[Barbelith]

Yes! It's back!
Batman designes a gas weapon that he can fit in his utility belt that destroys cotton plants. Deprived of its financial backbone, slavery will have to yield to the Anti-Cotton Bat-gas.
Batman 1, Slavery 0.

[TheBlackTiger]

Yea, cotton was a major US cash cow, but you also have to get Bats to modify the weapon to destroy cotton, sugar cane, and etc,.


how about breeding fruit bats that prey on all of the US's slave operated financial interests?


If I was bats on a second note, Id secretly teach every slave in the world martial arts......

[batnkevlar]

Through Martian Manhunter's telepathy...

wait. Is that allowed?

[Shawkur]

Next post...

[Shawkur]

One could argue that Batman vs. Slavery is an oxymoron because Bats, himself, is a type of slavemaster. I've seen no proof that Alfred has any life outside his servitude at the Mansion. Oracle is seemingly locked inside the clocktower and shackled to a compuiter 24 hours a day. He is always trying to strongarm other heroes and vigilantes into following his methods or ordering them to leave his city. Not to mention the oppression he has brought upon the disenfranchised mentally ill of Arkham Asylun and the underclass criminal element of Gotham City!

[batnkevlar]

You should be a lawyer, although you're arguements for the "insanely ill patients" and such are pretty bad...

haha

jk

[Zev]

Batman isn't a slavemaster. Everyone works for him voluntarily.

I should make it clear that Batman has the Batcave, Batmobile, Batwing, Alfred, his choice of a Robin, and Ace the Bat-Hound. His opponant is represented through the 1800s Southern region of the United States. The North can neither assist or attack the Dark Knight and Lincoln is not currently President or in the running for President. Just to keep things neutral, the President is Taft (or a computer-generated hologram).

[GL-Corps#28]

Yea, cotton was a major US cash cow, but you also have to get Bats to modify the weapon to destroy cotton, sugar cane, and etc,.


how about breeding fruit bats that prey on all of the US's slave operated financial interests?


If I was bats on a second note, Id secretly teach every slave in the world martial arts......

Let's see who can pick out the flaw in this post. :D

[Darko]

He just needs the help of Dave Chappelle and the Time Haters.


BATMAN and Dave Chappelle????????? I wanna see it.

[Comic Book Boy]

Batman will last longer than slavery....

[trasgh]

Prep time wins all :o

[trasgh]

or does it ? ;)

Im so confused.. :)

[AmazinUncleBen]

LMFAO SLAVERYY WOOOOOOOO Batman wins though.

[Mr.Jacobs]

Batman has two things that can greatly crush the slaving south.

1) teeth

2) A small boy in elf shoes.

Now, in theory Robin in his elfshoes and pantyhose could scare the cowardly white slave owners into thinking magic pixies are in thier dreams. Thus they would free thier slaves and follow the pixie boy's commands.

As for the teeth, well Batman can make that bad-ass evil smile he does so well with them pearly whites.

[rudeboy1326]

Batman vs. A Bowel Movement
http://www.leconcombre.com/serials/comics/img11/batman-aaargh.jpg
"I am vengeance... I am the night *pfft-clunk*"

____________________
This town needs an enima.

[AGL]

We must consider the possibility of Batman's strategy. Knowing history and being only one man, the most surefire way to end slavery quickly is to run for President and win. I'd say Batman knows enough about history to take advantage of it.

However, Batman's job is twofold if and when he becomes president. Outlaw slavery AND keep the union intact without resorting to war if at all possible. That's a tall order...

This seems like the best theory to me. Since Bruce Wayne is, in fact, a billionaire, I'm sure that he could win the Presidency, but he would still need the nation and the senate to be behind his policies.

[Bapman]

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA !! Man these are HILARIOUS !!
What about

SPIDER-MAN VS Violence against kids at school
GAMBIT VS Sexual relationship with minors
Captain Mar-vell / Genis-vell VS World Peace
DAREDEVIL VS discrimination against the handicapped
HULK VS Discrimination against the mentally challenged

Wow... the possibillities ARE endless !!

[Superman13]

WHAT TYPE OF THREAD IS THIS :mad:

[Zev]

This seems like the best theory to me. Since Bruce Wayne is, in fact, a billionaire, I'm sure that he could win the Presidency, but he would still need the nation and the senate to be behind his policies.

My God! I know where this is going! BRUCE WAYNE IS HIS OWN GREAT-GRANDFATHER!

[AGL]

Batman is winning. Apparently slavery isn't very popular.

If only this poll actually decided whether or not slavery in the real world would be annihilated.

[Cax40]

Well actually, according to the novel 'Batman:Knightfall' Bruce Wayne's ancestors were abolitionists and the batcave was used to hide runaway slaves.

[AGL]

Bump!
Yes! It's back!

The greatest thread in the history of threads.

[AGL 2]

If Lincoln could end slavery then so could Batman.

(banned, ha! F U C K you!)

[CConn]

The greatest thread in the history of threads.
IT IS!!! :hyper:

Batman will last longer than slavery....
I'll be looking foward to the next 15,000 years of Batman. :up: :(

[The Navigator]

What about Batman vs. Communism? That'd be interesting to see.

[kathryn]

If batman wanted to he could win
but bruse wayne would probably have some slaves milling about the house
unless eh lvied in the north but i always imagined the wayne manor being a plantation

[Cax40]

If batman wanted to he could win
but bruse wayne would probably have some slaves milling about the house
unless eh lvied in the north but i always imagined the wayne manor being a plantation
That is absurd! Batman's sense of justice and righteousness comes from Bruce Wayne, You can't separate the two. As a matter of fact, His ancestors were abolitionists and the batcave was used at that time to hide runaway slaves.

[kathryn]

touche
but for soem reason id imagine playboy bruce havign an affair with a black servant
haha just kidding
.....

[CConn]

touche
but for soem reason id imagine playboy bruce havign an affair with a black servant
haha just kidding
.....
You have a sick, sick mind...


...alright, I was thinking it too. :(

[Cax40]

touche
but for soem reason id imagine playboy bruce havign an affair with a black servant
haha just kidding
.....
As a Black Man, I have no problem with the idea of Bruce Wayne falling in love with a Black Women. My Wife is Caucasian, so I certainly understand that love transcends race and color, and so would Bruce Wayne.

[Lucid]

Batman will last longer than slavery....I'll be looking foward to the next 15,000 years of Batman. http://www.superherohype.com/forums/images/smilies/icon14.gif http://www.superherohype.com/forums/images/smilies/frown.gif
LOL!

[swifty]

Batman vs. A Bowel Movement
http://www.leconcombre.com/serials/comics/img11/batman-aaargh.jpg
"I am vengeance... I am the night *pfft-clunk*"

____________________
This town needs an enima.

http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/36/36_11_6.gif

http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/36/36_2_33.gif

[Lucid]

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[Beelze]

Robin Vs. Homosexuals' adoption rights
Captain America Vs. "Terrorism"

Eh, that's all I got. Either way... how much prep time does slavery get?

[Lucid]

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