WHats the best way to tell a nosy neigbour to mind their own business in a nice way?

[Deathlok2001]

There is this nosy neighbour. You talk to her once & she figures your her best friend. I realize she is a lonely old lady, never married, with few friends. But why does she keep dropping by my place unannounced? I am nice enough to chat with her when I see her, but this is crazy.

Any suggestions?

you see she just rang my doorbell, my patrio door was open, so was my front door but screen door was locked, but I did not answer the door.....
she went away after 2 rings...she is about 55-60 years old.....

[Iceman]

Just don't answer the door and pretend you never heard anything.

[Deathlok2001]

LOL.. I just might do that!

[Iceman]

It's probably something she'll be able to relate to ;) and it's definitely easier than trying to come up with the right words.

[Deathlok2001]

hahaahhaha...... she was ringing my doorbell just a few min ago. I was up in 1 of my spare bedrooms, reading SHH threads! LOL.... I could hear her as my window was open.

[jaguarr]

Tell her you would appreciate it if she didn't come by unannounced as you are a very private person and do not like surprise company. If she keeps doing it, answer the door in one of your sexy little outfits you like to dress up in and put as much bass as you can into your voice when you greet her at the door, inviting her in for some tea. She'll probably leave you alone after that. :up:

jag

[Deathlok2001]

Tell her you would appreciate it if she didn't come by unannounced as you are a very private person and do not like surprise company. If she keeps doing it, answer the door in one of your sexy little outfits you like to dress up in and put as much bass as you can into your voice when you greet her at the door, inviting her in for some tea. She'll probably leave you alone after that. :up:

jag

NO, she saw me in guy mode with nail polish & it di dnot faze her. Besides, she is a BIG gossip! :eek:

[Deathlok2001]

I dont want to be mean to her.

[Yurka]

tell her youre a sex offender but instead of targeting children you target old women

[jaguarr]

tell her youre a sex offender but instead of targeting children you target old women

This threat is only good if you are willing to follow through on it. :o

jag

[jaguarr]

NO, she saw me in guy mode with nail polish & it di dnot faze her. Besides, she is a BIG gossip! :eek:

I still stand by the first part of my post, Nancy Boy.

jag

[Deathlok2001]

LOL

I usually say I am in the middle of something. She changes the subject & keeps talking. I just walk away, then she says, oh I will see you later! WTF??????

[Iceman]

tell her youre a sex offender but instead of targeting children you target old women

That could qualify as slightly mean? :O :(

[Yurka]

That could qualify as slightly mean? :O :(

Sometimes you have to be to these old folks so they understand

[Deathlok2001]

She came over 3 times on sunday & once on Monday! How can a person be that dense?????:eek::eek::o

[Silverstein]

The next time she rings, just be like "Hey" or whatever and have a small talk. But make sure you mention that you hate it when people come by unannounced. And then forget to give her your phone number. And simply move on. If she stops by to ask for your number, tell her you were just leaving.

If she keeps annoying you, get a huge ****ing water gun, piss in it and then shoot that ***** to hell!!! And if she comes back after that, light her on fire. If she comes back trying to sue you, get a big dog and have it chase her and bite a chunk out....if she comes back after that then call the cops, because you've got a stalker, my friend.

[Iceman]

Sometimes you have to be to these old folks so they understandA headlock always helps with the process of understanding :up:

[Deathlok2001]

In fact, a few years ago, she use to sell me avon ( I liked their nail polish & other stuff)

[Abaddon]

Just be honest and tell them. But in drag.

[Mr. Walters]

Just be honest and tell them. But in drag.

I do that all the time.

At the apartments I live in we have a really twisted policy. If someone is making noise -any kind of noise- we are supposed to call the cops. Cops don't care about a loud stereo, so we're just supposed to call them and say there is a disturbance or something. Then when the cops come, the landlady says, "I can't have the cops showing up, you'll have to move out." Keep in mind this is the landlady's policy. She makes it so easy to get our fellow tenants kicked out. Basically, if I just plain didn't like someone I could have them removed. Kind of messed up isn't it?

[Zaed]

i say get an attack monkey. everytime she knocks on the door the monkey will run out and piss on her legs. that should keep her away.

or you could get some pepper spray. just wait in hiding until she comes to the door and just as she's about to knock spray her in the face. pretty effective if you ask me.

if she's really persistant you can use both. spray her while your attack monkey pees on her legs. :up:

[Ronny Shade]

say "please mind your business and stop being nosy, kthanxbye"

[RogueLDN]

come on to her, that way she'll either get lost or get nekkid.

[Danalys]

well the only way i can think of right now which isn't particulary nice depending on the nosy person, is to get naked and write "some privacy would be nice." on yourself, but that could get you into trouble.

[Spider-Man Luvr28]

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/images2/lovethyneighbor.jpg

Problem solved.:up:

[Erzengel]

Answer the door naked.

[logansoldcigar]

say "please mind your business and stop being nosy, kthanxbye"

or, as i would phrase it "feck off"

[Ronny Shade]

Answer the door naked.
That reminds me of Grandma's Boy. "Your ass is tanner than my face"

[Danalys]

only if they aren't going to fight back. see if someone did that to me i'd reshape it in the night to look like they were masturbating.

[Bad Superman]

There is this nosy neighbour. You talk to her once & she figures your her best friend. I realize she is a lonely old lady, never married, with few friends. But why does she keep dropping by my place unannounced? I am nice enough to chat with her when I see her, but this is crazy.

Any suggestions?

you see she just rang my doorbell, my patrio door was open, so was my front door but screen door was locked, but I did not answer the door.....
she went away after 2 rings...she is about 55-60 years old.....

Easy. Pop in a porn DVD every time she comes in unannounced and raise the volume to a credible level where she can listen and I'm sure she'll get the message you are "busy". :D


:mad:

[Spider-Man Luvr28]

I think my idea's better.:o:p

[War Lord]

There is this nosy neighbour. You talk to her once & she figures your her best friend. I realize she is a lonely old lady, never married, with few friends. But why does she keep dropping by my place unannounced? I am nice enough to chat with her when I see her, but this is crazy.

Any suggestions?

you see she just rang my doorbell, my patrio door was open, so was my front door but screen door was locked, but I did not answer the door.....
she went away after 2 rings...she is about 55-60 years old.....

I've found that the best way to handle it is tactful honesty. If she drops by, be willing to chat for whatever time you really have and then when you need to break it off, do it gently.

You could also be willing to take the time out for an occasional visit.

[ang_hulk]

well
set up torches in your yard,nothing special just fire on a stick.walk outside really early in the morning with boxers and large boots with a winter coat on no matter the season
practice with big flashy weapons in the yard
yell alot
if she ever is attracted to these things then you have fun and tell her a terrible story about somone who came in your yard.thats the end.

[November Rain]

There is this nosy neighbour. You talk to her once & she figures your her best friend. I realize she is a lonely old lady, never married, with few friends. But why does she keep dropping by my place unannounced? I am nice enough to chat with her when I see her, but this is crazy.

Any suggestions?

you see she just rang my doorbell, my patrio door was open, so was my front door but screen door was locked, but I did not answer the door.....
she went away after 2 rings...she is about 55-60 years old.....you're in too deep, you'll have to wait for her to bite the dust...

un-lucky....

[Corinthian™]

dress in drag, unshaved and with a very deep voice... and call her susan just because


OR


Try to disguise as a Satanist and try to invite her

OR

pretend you were having Sex with a Girl

[Octoberist]

Just stare at the sky when they're around. Keep on staring and they'll go away.

[kainedamo]

She's just a friendly neighbour. I know it's an old fashioned concept, but neighbours used to drop in on each other all the time.

If you really want rid of her you'll just have to tell her. Use your common sense and just say "look I like my privacy and I don't really like unannounced visits". Let us know how it goes.

Alternatively, get her msn and tell her on msn.

[LEX]

Just tell her straight-out nicely and politely that you want her to respect your privacy. Simple as that.

If you want to be subtle instead, just let her in, listen to your CD player with your headphones on and read a book. She'll get the message.

[redmarvel]

Here's a thought.... give her a taste of her own medicine.

Drop by her place at 5 in the morning, saying, "Hi. I woke up early and wondered if you could make me a cup of coffee." Then drop by her place around midnight and ask if she could give you a "shot". Then try 3am, saying "Hey, I figured since we were such good friends you wouldn't mind making me an omelet, I've run out of eggs". Keep doing this and she'll tell you to get lost.