When comic book characters see their movies

[PyroChamber]

What do you think comic book characters would say after watching themselves being portrayed on the big screen?

[Mee]

Batman: Hmm...where was the prep time?

[3dman27]

catwoman
"i think i'd better call my lawyer thats NOT the movie i authorized warner bros. to make"

[FOG3]

Superman
I thought the camera was supposed to add ten pounds?

[Obi-Ron]

Ben Grimm: It's clobberin' time!

[ShadowBoxing]

There is a great DareDevil comic in Twister ToyFare Theatre where he gets the blind version of DareDevil. He puts it in the DVD player and it starts off "DareDevil, starring Ben Affleck, yes that Ben Affleck" and DareDevil spits his coffee all over the TV screen. The voice over guy goes on to tell him "Okay in this scene DareDevil fights Elektra on a seasaw and you what, I quit...". Then DareDevil goes on to sure Ben Affleck for making DareDevil. Ben Affleck is charged with the crime of "every movie since Good Will Hunting". Hysterical.

[3dman27]

spidey"i wish i looked as good as tobey"

[3dman27]

the monk with no name[bulletproof monk]
"i didn't know i was a chow yun fat lookalike not bad"

[FOG3]

Superman
Who the hell is Jason White?

[Pink Ranger]

Alfred:
"Since when is Batgirl my f##kin' niece? F##kin Schumacher!"

Sue Storm:
"Wow. She makes the 1960s version of me look like a goddamn brain surgeon by comparison."

Batgirl:
"Getting shot and molested by the Joker wasn't as painful as watching this movie."

Robin:
"Getting shot and molested by the Joker wasn't as painful as watching this movie."

Punisher:
"Wait, wait ... I'm lost. What's with this bit about the fake fire hydrant and illegally parking the car at the hotel again? I'm not following the story."

Hulk:
"I knew it. Everything in my life goes to hell when Peter David's not writing me."

Rachel Dawes:
"I think ... waitaminute, I was never in the comics. I shouldn't even be!"
**vanishes into a cloud of logic**

[X-Ray]

Cyclops: "Why am I such an pussy in this film ? I'm the goddamn leader for crying outloud, & I barely say a damn thing !? ..."


**adjustes his goggles to blast away at will**



Gambit: "3 movies and I'm still not in it! ..."


**charges up an whole deck of cards**

[spidey-dude]

Punisher:
"Wait, wait ... I'm lost. What's with this bit about the fake fire hydrant and illegally parking the car at the hotel again? I'm not following the story."


errrrm??? comic book punisher isn't an idiot i'm sure he would figure it out

[NHawk19]

Superman:

"Does my Suit really look that bad?"

[November Rain]

i think the hulk would be satisfied with his rendition

we already know how ultimate spidey woudl eact like and he's practically the same as normal parker. as a youngster

[Spider-Kurt!]

Bane "Ain't this **** about a mutha ****in *****?"

Mr.Freeze "Co-sign."

Batman to Joel Schumacher,Arnold Swazzenegger,Vil Kilmer,Tommy Lee Jones,Chris O Donnell and George Clooney "From now on,none of you are safe."

Spider-Man "C'mon Maguire! One joke. Say at least one joke!"

Green Goblin "This is an outrage! I look ridiculous! Where are my purple panties and elf shoes? Where is my pumpkin purse???"

Hulk "Zzzzz"

Judge Dredd "Dang, I do kinda look like Sylvester Stallone!"

The Black Panther's grand-child "Well,It's about damn time!"

Johnny Storm "Sis, I soooo wanna do you now!"

Sue Storm "I soooo wanna do me too!"

Elektra "Who is this movie based on again?"

[3dman27]

the gutver why are the depicting me as a white american civiliani'm a japanese soldier?

[true316]

http://superman.ws/tales3/cartoonhero/

:D

[Speedball]

Spider-man: I'm not really that boring in real life. *Turns to MJ* Am I?

[3dman27]

Spider-man: I'm not really that boring in real life. *Turns to MJ* Am I?
mj "nope not boring agrivating as hell sometimes but not boring":spidey:

[3dman27]

sue storm richards
"they could have done worse than jessica alba to play me they could have gotten ROSANNE"

[Speedball]

mj "nope not boring agrivating as hell sometimes but not boring":spidey:
I'm not talking about the film, I'm talking about Tobey's performance.
One of the problems I have with the films is him.

[Isildur´s Heir]

If they saw their movies, every single superhero would say the same thing..

WTF IS THAT??
He/she looks like me, he/she dresses like me (sort of), and has my name, but he´s/she´s definitely not me.
Sure, some traits are right or close, but damn, they got so much wrong...

[CConn]

If they saw their movies, every single superhero would say the same thing..

WTF IS THAT??
He/she looks like me, he/she dresses like me (sort of), and has my name, but he´s/she´s definitely not me.
Sure, some traits are right or close, but damn, they got so much wrong...You think so, huh? :o

http://img2.imagepile.net/img2/63474supesmovie.jpg

[slater74]

Dr Doom (Right after killing everyone who participated to the FF movie and having every copy destroyed): Dr Doom doesn't like the way he's portrayed in this movie. Do it again.

[3dman27]

aunt may after watching the spider-man movies
"that actress looks and sounds right but i wish they'd have her tell peter that with "great power comes great responsibility" has NOTHING to do with taking the law into your own hands":spidey:

[theShape]

Spidey:

"Since when do my webs actually come out of my ****ing wrist?"

Batman:

"Shumacher, I won't kill you, but...Oh, **** it. I'm gonna kill you, you bastard."

[3dman27]

mj watching spider-man on hearing the line i think i've got a superhero stalker
"WHAT dunst thinks having a stalker is aGOOD thing ?i'd like to tell her about jonathan cesar"

[Dr. Fate]

Superman after seeing SR: "Why the Hell would I leave for five years without telling anyone or even at least leaving a post it note on the fridge for Lois? And why do I look so much younger after being gone for 5 years? Why is Lois looking so much younger after 5 years? Is it even possible for Lois to carry my child? Since when do I get caught up in Spider-Man esque unfulfilled love angst scenarios? And why would Lex try the another ham fisted land grab scheme? Why..."

Lois Lane after seeing SR: "Why do I look like a high school kid?"

Lex Luthor after seeing SR: "Why the Hell would I try another land grab scheme? And why would I employ someone as dimwitted as Kitty?"

Batman after seeing the 1989 Batman film: "Well, production wise, it looks great, and I love Jack Nicholson as much as anyone else, but why is Michael Keaton so short and skinny?"

Catwoman after seeing Batman Returns: "Why do I have blonde hair in this movie?"

The Penguin after seeing Batman Returns: "Where is my dignity?! Where?!"

Two-Face on Batman Forever: "Since when are we ever that hyper?"

Riddler on Batman Forever: "I never worked for Bruce Wayne! And I am not that flamboyant! I'm all man!"

Hulk on Hulk: "Hulk smash Ang Lee!"

The Punisher on both Punishers: "Why did they dress Dolph Lundgren up like a poor man's Terminator? And what was Thomas Jane doing in the Caribbean? And how could they misuse Roy Scheider like that? Disgraceful."

Daredevil commenting on the mischaracterization of Elektra: "I need an adult! I need an adult!"

Norman Osborne on Spider-Man: "Why doesn't my Green Goblin mask allow for actual visible mouth movements?"

Mary Jane Watson on Spider-Man: "Where was my fiery personality?"

Wolverine on the X-Men: "Damn I look good when I stand a foot taller."

Cyclops on the X-Men: "I'll get you for this, Bryan Singer! You too, Ratner!"

Rogue on the X-Men: "What the Hell have they done to me?!"

Xavier on X-Men: "Why do I keep expecting myself to say #1?"

[3dman27]

Daredevil commenting on the mischaracterization of Elektra: "I need an adult! I need an adult!"


i don't get the joke

[MulligaN Stew]

Batman[after seeing everyone in succession]: *phew* Full-Circle. Patience is everything.

*five minutes later*

Ok, I have let my anger go; now I am going to kick Schumacher's ***.
__________________________________________________ ______
Superman:
*sees the 1st one and smiles*

Ma and Pa were like that. Luther was a little too campy, but that would make my job easier, so all in all, it's a great movie.

*sees the 2nd*

??? Uh, . . . it's good. . .

*sees 3 & 4*

*starts searching for Kryponite to punish himself for inspiring such crap*

*sees SR*

Hey, Routh really does look like me. Tom Welling my ***. __________________________________________________ ________
Catwoman[after seeing herself in Batman Returns]: Is there anything that Michelle Pfieffer can't do. . .besides you know, convince people that she's me?

[after seeing CINO]: . . . are you ****ing kidding me? Ugh, not even jewelry can cheer me up after that. I feel . . . lost.
__________________________________________________ ________
Iron-Man: Well, it was Robert Downey. . . so, why not? Huh?

*nervous laughter*
__________________________________________________ ________
Joker[after seeing Jack in Batman]: Pfft, he's only so good at it because he wants to be me; ***hole.

[after seeing Heath Ledger]: He's only so good at it because he wants to be like me; ***hole.
__________________________________________________ ________
The Punisher: [after seeing the 1st one]*silence*, *moments later*, *silent tears*, *decides to retire*

[after seeing the latest one] *speechless* . . . It's. . . not bad, nor good. Why did they shoot this again? Losing relatives was NOT this painful. So close to good, yet so far from great. *consoles himself* At least it wasn't a Nick Fury movie.
__________________________________________________ _________
Nick Fury: *anger*
*rising anger*
*coordinates SHIELD task force to assassinate David Hasselhoff*
__________________________________________________ _________
The Penguin: Ugh, I don't eat fish you jack***. Danny Devito isn't civilized, and I'm not that creepy. I kill people. I don't glare at them. It's unbecoming. Batman wouldn't defeat me THAT easily.
__________________________________________________ _________
The Riddler[after seeing Batman Forever]: . . . was he on cocaine when he did that?

Could somebody find out? Thanks.
__________________________________________________ _________
Two-Face: I was the best part in that movie. Too bad it sucked.
Riddler: No you weren't. You were the best . . .um, co-star.
Two-Face: Let's flip on it.
Riddler: You do that Jr.
Two-Face: *grumbles* At least my brain wasn't fried!
Riddler: *shocked* I have no comeback for that; Bats made me like you. What could I say?
__________________________________________________ __________
Spider-Man: Pfft, the ladies give me a little bit more credit than that.
Mary Jane: ditto.
Green Goblin: ?? That guy was a ****ing criminal. I liked him. He had panache

Doc-Ock: That bastard ruined me. NOOOOOOOOOOO is exactly what I thought when he was saying it. I'm cemented in history with such an inferior statement as this? I am a sage and they make me say that? He said it like a school child. *snickers* At least I'm not Darth Vader. There's a villain who was really screwed.
__________________________________________________ ___________
TMNT:
Leo - Movies suck.
Donatello - I had work to do, and I feel as if I've been molested. . . .
Ralphael - I'm no Donny, but even I could've done better than that.
Michaelangelo - That movie made me hungry. Pizza anyone?
*They haze Michaelangelo*
*Then they order 3 large w/ everything . . .except anchovies*
__________________________________________________ ___________
Xavier: Well done Bryan. Mr. Ratner, I'm usually not a violent man, but you have 5 minutes to enlighten me as to why I shouldn't make your head explode.

Magneto: I was magnificient. Does anything else matter? I even endured betrayal in a prudent manner. Yes, I am a god; for that reason, I am going to watch with glee as Charles destroys a certain 'Rat'.

Cyclops: eh, 2 out of 3. Jean WOULD NEVER KILL ME!! *cries*

Wolverine: I'm taller. . .but he's gay.

*confused, decides to reserve judgement for sequel starring only him*

Kitty Pryde: Ugh, she's fat; I'm going shopping. *eats Hagen Daaz*

Mystique: . . . .I'm too good for that ending. I feel used. Why were my children clueless imbeciles? Hollywood really does ruin things.
*plots Tim Rothman assassination attempt*
__________________________________________________ __________
Sue Storm: She's not a real blond. She can't even act like me. I'm not just eye candy. . . Am I? Reed, come here a min. . .*confused*

Reed: Well, I guess that's me. Ha, it could be worse.

Johnny: That guy was a sniveling jack***. I like him.

Ben Grimm: That suit was an insult. Johnny's the funny one.
*clobbers Tim Rothman right before Mystique takes the shot*
__________________________________________________ __________

[Max J Power]

Nick Fury: (stares at the blank screen for a few minutes after the movie ends and then shoots himself in the face).

Batman (after seeing Batman and Robin): "That's not me. I'm the goddamn Batman."

[MulligaN Stew]

Tsk, tsk, silly me. I forgot THE MOST important one in the history of movies.

Dick Grayson also known as the Boy Wonder:

Robin: . . . that. . . was nice.

*moments later*

Robin: [Rodney Dangerfield] AHhHhHhhhhh, who am I kidding! I don't get no respect!!! [/Rodney Dangerfield]

As long as Batman's in the film, I'm delegated to the side-kick. Enough of this! I won't let the old man ruin me anymore! I'll never be Robin again.

*cries and runs to Barbara for consolement*

Three weeks later:

Dick: I've had it old man; I'm done with this! Go find another lackey!

Bruce: You want out? There's the door; I suspect you can use it better than your utility belt.

Dick: No respect! No respect! *cries but not in front of Bruce*

All in all, Batman Forever and Batman and Robin are both primary reasons as to why Nightwing actually came in existence today. It's true I tell you.
Screw chronology and don't worry yourself with the details of time line. It's to intricate for any mere hypster to understand. Just know that 'Nightwing' is doing fine, and he's taking counseling to deal with the dark depression of being in Batman's shadow. Judging from his name change, his will to rise above his past[esp those green psuedo-speedos that he was subjected to], and his determination to be something unique, I think he'll make it.

True Story.

[OmeletDeFromage]

Magneto: "McKellen's good, but I don't look that old."

Norman Osborn: "That's one realistic-looking Goblin mask on Dafoe there... Huh? What do you mean he's not wearing a mask?!"

Reed Richards: "My gray hairs were a side-effect of the cosmic rays? Why... Yes, yes they were!"

Lex Luthor: "I'm surprised Singer didn't have Spacey call himself 'The greatest criminal mind of our time!'"

Storm: "I want to know what happens when Halle Berry gets struck by lightning."

Catwoman: "So do I!"

Two-Face: (Flips his two-headed coin. Unscarred side comes up.) "Two thumbs up!"

[3dman27]

ben grimm "good job chickie but i dont mumble "its clobberin' time i say it LOUD AND CLEAR:thing:

[ShadowBoxing]

Batman: Wait, how the f*** did hollywood figure out I was Bruce Wayne.

[ScarletSpider]

The Thing: Wotta revoltin' development.