*Official* Relationship Advice Thread

[dark_b]

Well answer the question first.

Is she like the only girl in your life right now?yes. but i know what you are trying to say.

[dark_b]

Whoa nelly!!!
There is a significant difference between what a woman says she likes and what she falls for. I could tell you the number of my female friends that have a "type" (like one girl, Julie, LOVED shorter guys with dark hair and dark eyes, who dressed the 'metro' style...she swore she'd marry a guy like that. She married, and had two wonderful kids with, a tall, blonde, blue eyed, 'rugged, outdoorsy' guy)

Essentially, if there is chemistry between you two then you should give it a shot...just because you don't match her physical/emotional/character description means nothing. The important thing is chemistry and mutual attraction.

Incidentally, what DID she say she looks for in a guy that you don't have...just for analysis sake.this is about how they looked.

[Erzengel]

yes. but i know what you are trying to say.

That it's very common to fall for your friend because they are the only person of the opposite sex giving you attention?

It's very common. And it'd be really easy to see her with rose colored glasses, "she's perfect"?

As for "not being her type", people sometimes don't actually know what they want. I always thought I'd be with a dark haired girl, light eyed, white girl. I'm with a mulatta. :huh:

If there's attraction, common interests, etc. "type" might just go out the window.

[Superman79]

this is about how they looked.

what I said or what she said? (for my clarification)

[Superman79]

If there's attraction, common interests, etc. "type" might just go out the window.

Bingo!

Especially physical 'types'. Those preferences can change constantly.

[Erzengel]

Verbal praise of my posts are allowed btw until the end of your suspension. :up:

[Superman79]

Verbal praise of my posts are allowed btw until the end of your suspension. :up:

lol...fair enough.

Though in my defense, I am doing much, much better. :up:

[hammy]

now comes the ''se7en'', ''sixth sense'' twist. the more info i am finding about her the more i am noticing that i am not her type.
it doesnt help that she give you the impression that she is in to you.

Forget what she has told you is her type. Is she showing interest? That's all that matters. I have been attracted to completely different types of guys. What really matters is how well you get along and the chemistry.

[Val]

Oh wow, thank you guys for replying.

^he def seems interested, but I feel you on not wanting to show too much interest . . .

Heh yeah there is a fine line between showing interest and sounding like a psychopath stalker isn't there?

also, the whole Thursday thing sounds a bit off . . . it's possible he's seeing someone else (don't get too worried, just maybe probe a bit like saying "well, I'm busy on Thursday, are you free on the weekend") . . .

He could be a little bit shy about asking you out, Val. Lots of different ways to handle and interpret that, but there could be some of that going on. He may not want to put you off or scare you, thus the Thursday date because it's "safer" than a weekend date. Just thinking out loud.

Well, you might have made him think you weren't interested when you weren't able to go out when he wanted to. About the Thursday thing, I personally think that's a better day for a first or second date, it doesn't hold the pressure of a weekened date, but is still very close to the weekend.

Hm okay, that's good to know, see for me, a thrusday date just sounds like "well, I have better things to do on the weekend but I'm bored on thrusday, may as well go out with you", but it's good to know it's not really what you guys mean.

I did invite him to come hang out with us a couple of times since a few of my roommates other HS friends were in town and he knew them, but he couldn't make it so I'm guessing we are kinda even on the asking out territory.

You guys say women are complicated but men are not very far behind... :oldrazz:

[Superman79]

Oh wow, thank you guys for replying.



Heh yeah there is a fine line between showing interest and sounding like a psychopath stalker isn't there?







Hm okay, that's good to know, see for me, a thrusday date just sounds like "well, I have better things to do on the weekend but I'm bored on thrusday, may as well go out with you", but it's good to know it's not really what you guys mean.

I did invite him to come hang out with us a couple of times since a few of my roommates other HS friends were in town and he knew them, but he couldn't make it so I'm guessing we are kinda even on the asking out territory.

You guys say women are complicated but men are not very far behind... :oldrazz:

Complicated?? No.
Dumb as dorknobs and dense as brick?? Yes.

;) :woot:

[dark_b]

That it's very common to fall for your friend because they are the only person of the opposite sex giving you attention?

It's very common. And it'd be really easy to see her with rose colored glasses, "she's perfect"?

As for "not being her type", people sometimes don't actually know what they want. I always thought I'd be with a dark haired girl, light eyed, white girl. I'm with a mulatta. :huh:

If there's attraction, common interests, etc. "type" might just go out the window.we are not good friends. :yay:
its not like i see her every week .

[Erzengel]

But you've stated she's essentially the only girl in your life which could result in the same type feelings.

[The Amazing Lee]

Complicated?? No.
Dumb as dorknobs and dense as brick?? Yes.

;) :woot:

I agree with this statement 100% :o

[Val]

Complicated?? No.
Dumb as dorknobs and dense as brick?? Yes.

;) :woot:

Well, that makes you guys complicated! :oldrazz:

[jaguarr]

Complicated?? No.
Dumb as dorknobs and dense as brick?? Yes.

;) :woot:

Well, that makes you guys complicated! :oldrazz:

You heard it here first, guys; women find doorknobs and bricks complicated! I have the proof in writing! :D

jag

[Superman79]

You heard it here first, guys; women find doorknobs and bricks complicated! I have the proof in writing! :D

jag


ZING!!!

lol. :woot:

[Val]

You heard it here first, guys; women find doorknobs and bricks complicated! I have the proof in writing! :D

jag

Cute... :whatever:

[Superman79]

Cute... :whatever:

You can't throw a meatball over the plate like that and not expect jag to swing for the fences...;)

[jaguarr]

Cute... :whatever:

:grin:

jag

[Master Chief]

I met my girlfriend's friend who flew in from Italy and I think her friend is trying to get me to makes all the sex but I love my girlfriend and don't love her friend and she keeps texting me and leaving voice mailies what should I do holy frik? :(

[Ash J. Williams]

Ok, so I suggested her and I go to Winter Ball or see a movie. Just had to get it off my chest.

[Superman79]

Ok, so I suggested her and I go to Winter Ball or see a movie. Just had to get it off my chest.

Nice. :up:

And she said????????

[hammy]

I met my girlfriend's friend who flew in from Italy and I think her friend is trying to get me to makes all the sex but I love my girlfriend and don't love her friend and she keeps texting me and leaving voice mailies what should I do holy frik? :(

Tell her in no uncertain terms that you are and will continue to be faithful to your girlfriend. Then tell your girlfriend what her friend has been up to. I suspect they won't be friends for much longer.

[bullets]

I met my girlfriend's friend who flew in from Italy and I think her friend is trying to get me to makes all the sex but I love my girlfriend and don't love her friend and she keeps texting me and leaving voice mailies what should I do holy frik? :(



what if its bait?? tell her your all set. then regret not having another notch in the tool belt 4eva.

[jaguarr]

I met my girlfriend's friend who flew in from Italy and I think her friend is trying to get me to makes all the sex but I love my girlfriend and don't love her friend and she keeps texting me and leaving voice mailies what should I do holy frik? :(

Best thing you could do? Exactly what bullets and Casey said; tell her she's a nice girl, but you'd rather she didn't contact you without your girlfriend being involved. Could be a trap your girlfriend set to see if you'd be faithful, might not be. Either way, set this girl straight. :up:

jag

[Badger]

...or hit it likes it's 1999. :ninja:

[hammy]

...or hit it likes it's 1999. :ninja:

I'll hit you. :cmad:
http://bestsmileys.com/hitting/25.gif

[Superman79]

I'll hit you. :cmad:
http://bestsmileys.com/hitting/25.gif

casey...remember violence never solved anything! But its still fun ;)

[amazingfantasy15]

I met my girlfriend's friend who flew in from Italy and I think her friend is trying to get me to makes all the sex but I love my girlfriend and don't love her friend and she keeps texting me and leaving voice mailies what should I do holy frik? :(

Threesome!

[Superman79]

Threesome!

Ah the magical, mythical threesome. As elusive to most men as the Sasquatch or the Loch Ness Monster...seen on occasion, but the existence thereof is never completely proven.

[GuardianofOa]

How exactly did this person get your number? If you gave it out, it's your own fault. And you should expect something of this nature.

[tzarinna]

Ugh, some guy at work approached me at work yesterday. It was very odd. I'm not attracted to him at all, but I'm trying to be nice 'cause he was almost begging and that made me really uncomfortable. Him: I'm a sag. (as in sagittarius) Me: :dry: :help: Once I gave him my number he seemed to investigate it, questioned if it was a Baltimore number. He continually eluded to coming over to my place. That **** is not happening, ever. Of course he called last night and today he came to talk to me twice at work to find out what I was doing when I got off, again trying to come over. :down
Called tonight and I think he finally got it that he will not be coming over here. I don't know why I gave that man my number.

My coworkers were making fun and giving me **** about it yesterday and today. One of them seems like he likes me too, ugh but I can't stand his needy ass. I'm trying to be nice, they both seem so pathetic. :csad:

[amazingfantasy15]

Ugh, some guy at work approached me at work yesterday. It was very odd. I'm not attracted to him at all, but I'm trying to be nice 'cause he was almost begging and that made me really uncomfortable. Him: I'm a sag. (as in sagittarius) Me: :dry: :help: Once I gave him my number he seemed to investigate it, questioned if it was a Baltimore number. He continually eluded to coming over to my place. That **** is not happening, ever. Of course he called last night and today he came to talk to me twice at work to find out what I was doing when I got off, again trying to come over. :down
Called tonight and I think he finally got it that he will not be coming over here. I don't know why I gave that man my number.

My coworkers were making fun and giving me **** about it yesterday and today. One of them seems like he likes me too, ugh but I can't stand his needy ass. I'm trying to be nice, they both seem so pathetic. :csad:

Be nice, but to accidently lead them on, it's a fine line, but you crossed it with the one guy, giving him your number.

[Eggyman]

Ugh, some guy at work approached me at work yesterday. It was very odd. I'm not attracted to him at all, but I'm trying to be nice 'cause he was almost begging and that made me really uncomfortable. Him: I'm a sag. (as in sagittarius) Me: :dry: :help: Once I gave him my number he seemed to investigate it, questioned if it was a Baltimore number. He continually eluded to coming over to my place. That **** is not happening, ever. Of course he called last night and today he came to talk to me twice at work to find out what I was doing when I got off, again trying to come over. :down
Called tonight and I think he finally got it that he will not be coming over here. I don't know why I gave that man my number.

My coworkers were making fun and giving me **** about it yesterday and today. One of them seems like he likes me too, ugh but I can't stand his needy ass. I'm trying to be nice, they both seem so pathetic. :csad:


Sounds like you've got your mind set; that's a good thing. I've just stopped seeing a girl from work, and it really has taught me to stay away from colleagues in that type of situation.

This is a horrible saying, but it's so true: Don't **** where you eat.

[tzarinna]

I told him I wasn't looking for a relationship. But like I said the guy was standing in front of me, almost begging me. So I did it really just to get him out of my face and my coworker is backing him saying that I should be nice, that it took a lot for him to come up to me on the job. :csad:

[amazingfantasy15]

I told him I wasn't looking for a relationship. But like I said the guy was standing in front of me, almost begging me. So I did it really just to get him out of my face and my coworker is backing him saying that I should be nice, that it took a lot for him to come up to me on the job. :csad:

Ah, that's bs, you shouldn't be guilt tripped into giving a guy you don't like your phone number. It always takes courage to put yourself out there, but you've gotta be prepared for it not to go your way.

[jaguarr]

I told him I wasn't looking for a relationship. But like I said the guy was standing in front of me, almost begging me. So I did it really just to get him out of my face and my coworker is backing him saying that I should be nice, that it took a lot for him to come up to me on the job. :csad:

Tell him point blank that you do not want to go out with him. You are not interested in dating him, period, and don't want to hear anything more about it from him. You have to be blunt with guys like this. If he persists after that, utter the words "sexual harassment suit" to him, preferably if your boss is within earshot, and that should cool his jets.

jag

[tzarinna]

Okay, that was really weird. I feel bad now.
He called and was again very persistent about coming over, so I finally got around to telling him that I didn't think it was a good idea for us to go out. He again tried to change my mind. I got to tell ya he was really pissing me off with the pushiness.
He sounded pretty bummed that I let him down. *sigh*
Work should be fun on Monday.

[tzarinna]

And Jag, if he does bug me on Monday I will have to go there with the harassment. I don't think he's going to give up that easy. I think he's looking for a wife, and a mother for his 6 year old daughter. I'm not the one.

[jaguarr]

And Jag, if he does bug me on Monday I will have to go there with the harassment. I don't think he's going to give up that easy. I think he's looking for a wife, and a mother for his 6 year old daughter. I'm not the one.

Don't be afraid to do it. I know you work with a lot of Cro-Magnon type men in your field. Some of 'em don't understand that it's inappropriate as hell to bug women to go out with them on the job and have to have it drilled into their skull. You shouldn't have to put up with that crap.

That said, NEVER give anyone you really don't want calling you your phone number. Period. :up:

jag

[tzarinna]

Don't be afraid to do it. I know you work with a lot of Cro-Magnon type men in your field. Some of 'em don't understand that it's inappropriate as hell to bug women to go out with them on the job and have to have it drilled into their skull. You shouldn't have to put up with that crap.

That said, NEVER give anyone you really don't want calling you your phone number. Period. :up:

jag

:O I'm too nice! :mad:
I need to get back into ***** mode. :cmad:

I can't believe the guy kept trying to come over here, wtf. So bizarre.

[bullets]

:O I'm too nice! :mad:
I need to get back into ***** mode. :cmad:

I can't believe the guy kept trying to come over here, wtf. So bizarre.



you should pretend your going out with one of your guy friends . tell em sorry i am with someone else. idk

[tzarinna]

you should pretend your going out with one of your guy friends . tell em sorry i am with someone else. idk

There are some cute guys on the job. :p
But I just thought we could hang and I'm pretty sure I made that clear to this guy. The man has no tact at all, lol, I gave the guy such an earful for not respecting my decision to meet at a neutral place. He was just so pushy about coming over, maybe a brick upside the head would have gotten the point across better.

[jaguarr]

There are some cute guys on the job. :p
But I just thought we could hang and I'm pretty sure I made that clear to this guy. The man has no tact at all, lol, I gave the guy such an earful for not respecting my decision to meet at a neutral place. He was just so pushy about coming over, maybe a brick upside the head would have gotten the point across better.


Any guy that asks you out, even if he SAYS it's just to hang out, is not interested in JUST hanging out.

jag

[ShadowBoxing]

Any guy that asks you out, even if he SAYS it's just to hang out, is not interested in JUST hanging out.

jag
To quote Deep Thinkin'.....chyeah!

[DV8]

^yeah, that's a guy's way of getting his 'foot in the door', so to speak . . . we'll say whatever we have to sometimes just to get a chance to get to know a lady better . . . but of course, there are a lot of dumbasses like this guy that just have no tact at all . . .

[ShadowBoxing]

Yeah, I mean I totally started a conversation with the chick making my protien shake (let's not go there...) today just because she was hawt. She seemed interested, but I was just planting the seed today. (Hopefully) F***ing the plant will come much later.

[Steve Rogers]

Any guy that asks you out, even if he SAYS it's just to hang out, is not interested in JUST hanging out.

jag
A gay guy maybe :ninja:

[tzarinna]

Any guy that asks you out, even if he SAYS it's just to hang out, is not interested in JUST hanging out.

jag

Well, I think I was the one that put the we can hang out bit on there. I don't mind going out, I like meeting new people and ****. I just expect people to respect my boundaries and the stipulations I've placed. He just completely disregarded all of it as if he never heard a word I said. Now he pays the consequences. :twisted:

[DV8]

Yeah, I mean I totally started a conversation with the chick making my protien shake (let's not go there...) today just because she was hawt. She seemed interested, but I was just planting the seed today. (Hopefully) F***ing the plant will come much later.

well that's how smooth pimps like us do it, you know :D

[ShadowBoxing]

well that's how smooth pimps like us do it, you know :D
Of course, don't hate the playa, hate the game.

Anyways, I'm thinkin', since I'll obviously see her again within the next say three to four days the next tactic will be to passively ignore her. Not blow her off, but a "hi" when I walk him the door and maybe a half smile at most should do it. I have to make her feel like she needs to try a little harder to get my attention next time...so we'll see how that works.

[aaron]

youre into yourself huh?

[Deep Thinkin'!]

Ok, there are 3 guys I'm interested in. All of them I know fairly well, and they all like me just about the same... (to my knowledge)

Guy A: I talk to him on and off, and when I do see him, there have been several flirtatious hints. I haven't had a long discussion with him in a while, they've been short. Sweet. Caring. 1 week older.

Guy B: I see him everyday, and we talk frequently. A complete gentleman, family oriented. Though not much in common. 6 months older.

Guy C: I see him every other day, and we talk a little bit. We have a few things in common, very witty and hilarious. Has flirted with a few times. I have his number, but haven't talked to him through the phone yet.

Which one should I go for?

[ShadowBoxing]

youre into yourself huh?
A little.:hehe:

[aaron]

guy c

[ShadowBoxing]

Ok, there are 3 guys I'm interested in. All of them I know fairly well, and they all like me just about the same... (to my knowledge)

Guy A: I talk to him on and off, and when I do see him, there have been several flirtatious hints. I haven't had a long discussion with him in a while, they've been short. Sweet. Caring. 1 week older.

Guy B: I see him everyday, and we talk frequently. A complete gentleman, family oriented. Though not much in common. 6 months older.

Guy C: I see him every other day, and we talk a little bit. We have a few things in common, very witty and hilarious. Has flirted with a few times. I have his number, but haven't talked to him through the phone yet.

Which one should I go for?
As Erz said: never settle DT, never settle. If you think one is worth the time of day then pursue him, but don't make it about a behind door number A, B or C thing.

[ShadowBoxing]

I'd also like to add Deep Thinkin!, that you're a smart girl and obviously you don't need someone to prove you're worth a damn. I wouldn't try to force it too much. Attraction is not a choice. That girl today I mentioned seemed attracted to me, and whether she was or wasn't is immaterial...because ultimately it's not her choice to be. I can't really do anything to influence her aside from being who I am. Any game or con you try to use people will see through eventually. If you're genuinely attracted to someone ask them out, or give them the opportunity to ask you out.

But don't play this game of pick and choose. When you meet the person you think is right for you there won't be a choice of A, B and C...you'll know which one you want. The fact that you're mulling this over in your head suggests to me you don't really want to be with any of these guys.

Also, we really can't validate that type of choice for you. Or rather if you need someone else to tell you someone else is right for you...they probably aren't.

[Colossal Spoons]

Look at SB, givin advice lol

[hammy]

casey...remember violence never solved anything! But its still fun ;)

You're still thinking of that paddles comment. :O

[Ash J. Williams]

Nice. :up:

And she said????????

She asked if I was asking her out cuz I guess she thought I was kidding or something. I said, "In a way, yeah", in response, so now it's kinda wait-and-see.

[ShadowBoxing]

She asked if I was asking her out cuz I guess she thought I was kidding or something. I said, "In a way, yeah", in response, so now it's kinda wait-and-see.
That doesn't sound too promising. How did she end it exactly?

[Ash J. Williams]

That doesn't sound too promising. How did she end it exactly?

I did it through MySpace, so I guess I'm waiting for a response. In case you're wondering, she goes to my school.

[ShadowBoxing]

I did it through MySpace, so I guess I'm waiting for a response. In case you're wondering, she goes to my school.
God, you kids with your f***in' Myspace:csad: . If she goes to your school why didn't you just ask her out...I dunno...in person. Don't people do that anymore, or is talking to someone just a lost art.

[Ash J. Williams]

God, you kids with your f***in' Myspace:csad: . If she goes to your school why didn't you just ask her out...I dunno...in person. Don't people do that anymore, or is talking to someone just a lost art.

Probably cuz I felt it was easier.

[Badger]

She asked if I was asking her out cuz I guess she thought I was kidding or something. I said, "In a way, yeah", in response, so now it's kinda wait-and-see.

You needed to be more confident or seem more confident. The answer should have been a simple, "Yes, I am."

Don't sit back too long, if you're interested make sure there is no doubt.

[Ash J. Williams]

You needed to be more confident or seem more confident. The answer should have been a simple, "Yes, I am."

Don't sit back too long, if you're interested make sure there is no doubt.

All right.

[Badger]

I did it through MySpace, so I guess I'm waiting for a response. In case you're wondering, she goes to my school.

Ugh...

Let this be a lesson, never ask anyone out of the internet. Phone's fine, internet not fine.

[ShadowBoxing]

Probably cuz I felt it was easier.
Easier, but it just comes off as totally sketchy. I mean a girl is going to, I hope, be a lot more impressed by you having the guts to walk up to her, look into her eyes, and ask her out straight rather than sending her some Myspace e-mail

"Hey do youz wants to goes out with mee, lolz.

Check yes
Check no"

"Are u askin me out"

"IDK, ITS, brb, lolz"

[Manosman]

asking somone out on myspace or IM or anything similar to that is totally lame, imo. do it in person, or at least over the phone, no texting either. it shows the other person that you dont have confidence in yourself by doing it in messages, and why would they accept the offer if you cant even face them, or actually talk to them.

[Superman79]

Yeah, I mean I totally started a conversation with the chick making my protien shake (let's not go there...) today just because she was hawt. She seemed interested, but I was just planting the seed today. (Hopefully) F***ing the plant will come much later.

"Yeah, plant that seed. Plant it with your finger. Then you wait for the seed to grow into a plant and you f*** the hell out of it!!"

Ah, 40 Year Old Virgin...is there no relationship conversation that you're quotes can't apply to??? :woot:

[Superman79]

I did it through MySpace, so I guess I'm waiting for a response. In case you're wondering, she goes to my school.

No Ash!!! Bad monkey!!!

Ash. Because I care, I'm gonna put this bluntly:

Get your ass on the phone tonite/tomorrow and ask that girl to your formal!!!!:cmad:

If that is not convenient then ask her the first time you see her on Monday.
No more internet "ask outs".

[ShadowBoxing]

"Yeah, plant that seed. Plant it with your finger. Then you wait for the seed to grow into a plant and you f*** the hell out of it!!"

Ah, 40 Year Old Virgin...is there no relationship conversation that you're quotes can't apply to??? :woot:
No probably not. I should totally pull the Jade routine next time...shame I still haven't seen that film.

[Metamorpho1977]

Ok, here's my issue. A few years ago, I went with my church on a mission trip to Russia. While there, I met a girl. We hit it off pretty quick, before long, the pastor was getting on to me for spending so much time at the girl's house over night. I'm a Christian, but I'm not perfect. Anyway, about 8 months ago, I start getting emails from her. On a regular basis, we'd talked since being in Russia, but mostly just a couple times a month. Then she says she wants to come live with me in America and that she wants to get married. I really liked her and when she visited, I fell in love, and I thought she loved me, but a couple of friends of mine at work, told me she was just here for citizenship. I was blinded by love, and married her. Last month, she told me what my friends at work told me. What should I do?

[ShadowBoxing]

Ok, here's my issue. A few years ago, I went with my church on a mission trip to Russia. While there, I met a girl. We hit it off pretty quick, before long, the pastor was getting on to me for spending so much time at the girl's house over night. I'm a Christian, but I'm not perfect. Anyway, about 8 months ago, I start getting emails from her. On a regular basis, we'd talked since being in Russia, but mostly just a couple times a month. Then she says she wants to come live with me in America and that she wants to get married. I really liked her and when she visited, I fell in love, and I thought she loved me, but a couple of friends of mine at work, told me she was just here for citizenship. I was blinded by love, and married her. Last month, she told me what my friends at work told me. What should I do?
Oh wow...you're screwed.:csad: I can't even believe people still fall for that.

[Badger]

Yeah, not much you can do. Get a good lawyer and cut your losses. Sorry Dude.

[Deep Thinkin'!]

As Erz said: never settle DT, never settle. If you think one is worth the time of day then pursue him, but don't make it about a behind door number A, B or C thing.

I'd also like to add Deep Thinkin!, that you're a smart girl and obviously you don't need someone to prove you're worth a damn. I wouldn't try to force it too much. Attraction is not a choice. That girl today I mentioned seemed attracted to me, and whether she was or wasn't is immaterial...because ultimately it's not her choice to be. I can't really do anything to influence her aside from being who I am. Any game or con you try to use people will see through eventually. If you're genuinely attracted to someone ask them out, or give them the opportunity to ask you out.

But don't play this game of pick and choose. When you meet the person you think is right for you there won't be a choice of A, B and C...you'll know which one you want. The fact that you're mulling this over in your head suggests to me you don't really want to be with any of these guys.

Also, we really can't validate that type of choice for you. Or rather if you need someone else to tell you someone else is right for you...they probably aren't.

I see your point, but still doesn't answer my question. :o

Just kidding, but I guess you've got to understand when you're 16 and have yet to have a true boyfriend it gets kind of annoying seeing 12 year olds who have a good relationship. :O

But it's not that big a deal, it was just the kind of thing where was like "hmm, who seems better" ha.

[Badger]

I see your point, but still doesn't answer my question. :o

Just kidding, but I guess you've got to understand when you're 16 and have yet to have a true boyfriend it gets kind of annoying seeing 12 year olds who have a good relationship. :O

But it's not that big a deal, it was just the kind of thing where was like "hmm, who seems better" ha.

No such thing, they're playing house.

[ShadowBoxing]

I see your point, but still doesn't answer my question. :o

Just kidding, but I guess you've got to understand when you're 16 and have yet to have a true boyfriend it gets kind of annoying seeing 12 year olds who have a good relationship. :O
I wouldn't call anyone twelve year old's relationship "a good relationship".

"My Boyfriend is so cool, he sneaks me into PG-13 movies and everything:grin: ".
But it's not that big a deal, it was just the kind of thing where was like "hmm, who seems better" ha.
I know. I wouldn't make too much of a thing about it. Trust me, you've got plenty of time...and you live in ______, I doubt there is a shortage out there.

[Deep Thinkin'!]

No such thing, they're playing house.

Well, playing house seems to work for them.

I wouldn't call anyone twelve year old's relationship "a good relationship".

"My Boyfriend is so cool, he sneaks me into PG-13 movies and everything:grin: ".

I know. I wouldn't make too much of a thing about it. Trust me, you've got plenty of time...and you live in ______, I doubt there is a shortage out there.


lol, I'm not concerned about time. At the moment, I'm keeping myself busy with school and hobbies. Works for me. :up:

[Superman79]

I'd also like to add Deep Thinkin!, that you're a smart girl and obviously you don't need someone to prove you're worth a damn. I wouldn't try to force it too much. Attraction is not a choice. That girl today I mentioned seemed attracted to me, and whether she was or wasn't is immaterial...because ultimately it's not her choice to be. I can't really do anything to influence her aside from being who I am. Any game or con you try to use people will see through eventually. If you're genuinely attracted to someone ask them out, or give them the opportunity to ask you out.

But don't play this game of pick and choose. When you meet the person you think is right for you there won't be a choice of A, B and C...you'll know which one you want. The fact that you're mulling this over in your head suggests to me you don't really want to be with any of these guys.

Also, we really can't validate that type of choice for you. Or rather if you need someone else to tell you someone else is right for you...they probably aren't.

couldn't have said ti better myself :up:

[Master Chief]

THiNKin'!! Relationships are like. Not right unless like. They're. Right. So like. Don't. Force it. Or something. :confused:

Tell her in no uncertain terms that you are and will continue to be faithful to your girlfriend. Then tell your girlfriend what her friend has been up to. I suspect they won't be friends for much longer.

But then I'd feel means. :csad:

what if its bait?? tell her your all set. then regret not having another notch in the tool belt 4eva.

Awesome, lol kKkKkkKkkkKKkK


Best thing you could do? Exactly what bullets and Casey said; tell her she's a nice girl, but you'd rather she didn't contact you without your girlfriend being involved. Could be a trap your girlfriend set to see if you'd be faithful, might not be. Either way, set this girl straight. :up:

jag

Thx to everyone^^^^ :O

...or hit it likes it's 1999. :ninja:

But then I;d be so little. :bh:

Threesome!

I dunno if I'm ready for that lifestyle. :confused:

How exactly did this person get your number? If you gave it out, it's your own fault. And you should expect something of this nature.

I think it was given or gotten off my facebook, lol, I should take that s**t off.

newayz we all had drinkies and it was awesome but now I'm at home so lololololol it's all goooooooid.

[Ash J. Williams]

Easier, but it just comes off as totally sketchy. I mean a girl is going to, I hope, be a lot more impressed by you having the guts to walk up to her, look into her eyes, and ask her out straight rather than sending her some Myspace e-mail

"Hey do youz wants to goes out with mee, lolz.

Check yes
Check no"

"Are u askin me out"

"IDK, ITS, brb, lolz"
Ok, it didn't go like that, so whatever.
asking somone out on myspace or IM or anything similar to that is totally lame, imo. do it in person, or at least over the phone, no texting either. it shows the other person that you dont have confidence in yourself by doing it in messages, and why would they accept the offer if you cant even face them, or actually talk to them.
Yeah, I guess I didn't think of anything else. Sorry.
No Ash!!! Bad monkey!!!

Ash. Because I care, I'm gonna put this bluntly:

Get your ass on the phone tonite/tomorrow and ask that girl to your formal!!!!:cmad:

If that is not convenient then ask her the first time you see her on Monday.
No more internet "ask outs".
Only problem being: I don't have her number and I probably won't see her till Tuesday cuz of how my school is.

[Superman79]

Only problem being: I don't have her number and I probably won't see her till Tuesday cuz of how my school is.

Then ask her Tuesday. The important thing is that you ask her in person. SOON!

[tzarinna]

Ok, here's my issue. A few years ago, I went with my church on a mission trip to Russia. While there, I met a girl. We hit it off pretty quick, before long, the pastor was getting on to me for spending so much time at the girl's house over night. I'm a Christian, but I'm not perfect. Anyway, about 8 months ago, I start getting emails from her. On a regular basis, we'd talked since being in Russia, but mostly just a couple times a month. Then she says she wants to come live with me in America and that she wants to get married. I really liked her and when she visited, I fell in love, and I thought she loved me, but a couple of friends of mine at work, told me she was just here for citizenship. I was blinded by love, and married her. Last month, she told me what my friends at work told me. What should I do?


Does she have a hot brother?
I'll help you dispose of her body if you hook a sister up.

[jaguarr]

Then ask her Tuesday. The important thing is that you ask her in person. SOON!

Agreed. And have a SPECIFIC plan of what you want to go do with her and when. Don't do the "Hey, want to go do something sometime?" routine. Saying "Hey, I was thinking it might be fun if we went to see 'The Golden Compass' on Saturday and then had dinner over at Morty's Steakhouse. Are you up for that?" is a much better approach. It shows that you like her enough to put some thought into what you would like to do with her, are a person of action, and have the confidence to back it all up. It's not wishy-washy. Everyone prefers someone who's confident (not cocky). It's an aphrodisiac.

jag

[jaguarr]

Ok, here's my issue. A few years ago, I went with my church on a mission trip to Russia. While there, I met a girl. We hit it off pretty quick, before long, the pastor was getting on to me for spending so much time at the girl's house over night. I'm a Christian, but I'm not perfect. Anyway, about 8 months ago, I start getting emails from her. On a regular basis, we'd talked since being in Russia, but mostly just a couple times a month. Then she says she wants to come live with me in America and that she wants to get married. I really liked her and when she visited, I fell in love, and I thought she loved me, but a couple of friends of mine at work, told me she was just here for citizenship. I was blinded by love, and married her. Last month, she told me what my friends at work told me. What should I do?

How long have you been married? It may not be too late to seek an annulment. A good divorce attorney can help you. You were basically duped by this girl and lied to about your relationship with her, which may give you some legal wiggle-room with regards to how responsible you may be to her financially. If you've only been married a short time, this could be especially true. I'd get ahold of a good divorce attorney pronto and find out what your options are. The longer you let this wait the worse it's going to be for you. I know you're heartbroken and feeling misled, but you've got to be absolutely ruthless about this because this woman could f**k up your future earnings by seeking alimony, f**k up your credit, put you in debt up to your eyeballs (as long as you're married to her, you'll be responsible for any debt she incurs in most states), and get in the way of you meeting a girl who really will love you and isn't just looking to use you. I say tear this chick a new legal arsehole and get her deported. :up:

jag

[hammy]

But then I'd feel means. :csad:


There's nothing mean about being faithful to your girlfriend. :yay: You said you love her, so you don't want to mess that up. That's good. As for letting her know what sort of 'friend,' she had, it may seem mean but you'd actually be doing her a favor. As long as you didn't misconstrue what her friend was doing, anyway. If you're certain she was coming on to you, your girlfriend would want to know. Then it's up to her to decide if she wants to continue her friendship with that other girl or not. Have faith in her. :yay:

[Deep Thinkin'!]

Ok, guy A just turned into a jerk. :o

[Eggyman]

Ok, guy A just turned into a jerk. :o


Is this similar to the American 'Who's on first (third?) base' puzzle? :huh:

[Superman79]

Ok, guy A just turned into a jerk. :o

Do I need to kill him??

[Superman79]

Agreed. And have a SPECIFIC plan of what you want to go do with her and when. Don't do the "Hey, want to go do something sometime?" routine. Saying "Hey, I was thinking it might be fun if we went to see 'The Golden Compass' on Saturday and then had dinner over at Morty's Steakhouse. Are you up for that?" is a much better approach. It shows that you like her enough to put some thought into what you would like to do with her, are a person of action, and have the confidence to back it all up. It's not wishy-washy. Everyone prefers someone who's confident (not cocky). It's an aphrodisiac.

jag

:up: :up:

:super:79 Approved

:woot:

[jaguarr]

Ok, guy A just turned into a jerk. :o

Be glad that he outed himself so early in the process. Now you won't have to waste any more time on him. :up:

jag

[Metamorpho1977]

Does she have a hot brother?
I'll help you dispose of her body if you hook a sister up.

no brothers, but I'll hook you up with some metamorpho fun. I won't tell her.

[Metamorpho1977]

How long have you been married? It may not be too late to seek an annulment. A good divorce attorney can help you. You were basically duped by this girl and lied to about your relationship with her, which may give you some legal wiggle-room with regards to how responsible you may be to her financially. If you've only been married a short time, this could be especially true. I'd get ahold of a good divorce attorney pronto and find out what your options are. The longer you let this wait the worse it's going to be for you. I know you're heartbroken and feeling misled, but you've got to be absolutely ruthless about this because this woman could f**k up your future earnings by seeking alimony, f**k up your credit, put you in debt up to your eyeballs (as long as you're married to her, you'll be responsible for any debt she incurs in most states), and get in the way of you meeting a girl who really will love you and isn't just looking to use you. I say tear this chick a new legal arsehole and get her deported. :up:

jag

we've been married since April. I've been talking to an attorney. I'm at a point now where I want to divorce her and have her deported. I do find it ironic when I hit 6 figures in income this year that she starts this "just want citizenship" crap.

[jaguarr]

we've been married since April. I've been talking to an attorney. I'm at a point now where I want to divorce her and have her deported. I do find it ironic when I hit 6 figures in income this year that she starts this "just want citizenship" crap.

Give her the boot. Putin will welcome her back with open arms. :D

jag

[Val]

we've been married since April. I've been talking to an attorney. I'm at a point now where I want to divorce her and have her deported. I do find it ironic when I hit 6 figures in income this year that she starts this "just want citizenship" crap.

She needs to stay married to you for 5 years to get her citizenship, if you divorce her now, she won't get it.

[Badger]

Guess she didn't to her due dilignece. :o

Edit: It's actually 3 years, and there's an assload of paper work. Sounds like she's got a one way ticket to the Russia.

http://www.ehow.com/how_2002798_american-citizenship-marriage.html

[Deep Thinkin'!]

Do I need to kill him??


Feel free to do so.

[Fran]

:csad:

[Val]

:csad:

Whats wrong?

[Badger]

He just got his test back. :down

[tzarinna]

no brothers, but I'll hook you up with some metamorpho fun. I won't tell her.

If you don't mind playing dress up and speaking in a russian accent, you've got yourself a date. :hehe:

[Metamorpho1977]

If you don't mind playing dress up and speaking in a russian accent, you've got yourself a date. :hehe:

In the words of the great philosopher, Marvin Gaye, Let's get it on. Besides, I've been playing dress up with a girl with a Russian accent anyway for the last year.

[Ash J. Williams]

Then ask her Tuesday. The important thing is that you ask her in person. SOON!
Well, she denied my offer the first time, so I probably shouldn't ask her again.

[jaguarr]

Well, she denied my offer the first time, so I probably shouldn't ask her again.

Some girls want you to work for it and will make you ask them out several times before they'll say "yes". It's stupid and seems like a giant waste of time, but it's true. Don't give up, yet.

jag

[Ash J. Williams]

Some girls want you to work for it and will make you ask them out several times before they'll say "yes". It's stupid and seems like a giant waste of time, but it's true. Don't give up, yet.

jag
Yeah, but I don't wanna keep asking her to the point that it becomes annoying.

[jaguarr]

Yeah, but I don't wanna keep asking her to the point that it becomes annoying.


I always operated under the three strikes and you're out policy. If I thought that a girl was playing that game with me, I'd give her three chances. If she said "no" to all three, usually spaced out over the course of many weeks or even months and always with a very specific plan of what I wanted to go do with her and when (as I suggested to you earlier), then I'd never ask her again. I'd say 70% of the time I'd get a "yes" on the third try. It's a stupid game a lot of girls play (or at least they did back when I was dating). Man I don't miss all that. Glad I'm married. :)

jag

[Ash J. Williams]

I always operated under the three strikes and you're out policy. If I thought that a girl was playing that game with me, I'd give her three chances. If she said "no" to all three, usually spaced out over the course of many weeks or even months and always with a very specific plan of what I wanted to go do with her and when (as I suggested to you earlier), then I'd never ask her again. I'd say 70% of the time I'd get a "yes" on the third try. It's a stupid game a lot of girls play (or at least they did back when I was dating). Man I don't miss all that. Glad I'm married. :)

jag
Ok, I might try it. Guess I got nothing to lose.

[Badger]

That's the spirit. :up:

[Ash J. Williams]

But there is this other girl...

[Badger]

Be a playa, playa.

[jaguarr]

The Badger is right, ask them both out. :up:

jag

[Val]

The Badger is right, ask them both out. :up:

jag

*sigh*

[jaguarr]

*sigh*

Why the sigh? I'm not encouraging him to cheat on one with the other. I'm encouraging him to open up his dating pool. Only way to find someone worth being with in a committed relationship is to date as much as possible.

jag

[Val]

Why the sigh? I'm not encouraging him to cheat on one with the other. I'm encouraging him to open up his dating pool. Only way to find someone worth being with in a committed relationship is to date as much as possible.

jag

Well yeah and it's fine as long as he lets one go after he makes up his mind, which doesn't always happen... :oldrazz:

[Ash J. Williams]

Well yeah and it's fine as long as he lets one go after he makes up his mind, which doesn't always happen... :oldrazz:
One might be jealous, though.

[jaguarr]

Well yeah and it's fine as long as he lets one go after he makes up his mind, which doesn't always happen... :oldrazz:

Or, he may decide he doesn't like either one of them after he really gets to know them and moves on to another one (or two). ;)

jag

[Val]

One might be jealous, though.

One who knows you are also interested in the other? Yeah that could be very bad.

[Ash J. Williams]

One who knows you are also interested in the other? Yeah that could be very bad.
They kinda do.

[bullets]

eh let em both know . jealously raises your stock , its all good.

[Superman79]

I always operated under the three strikes and you're out policy. If I thought that a girl was playing that game with me, I'd give her three chances. If she said "no" to all three, usually spaced out over the course of many weeks or even months and always with a very specific plan of what I wanted to go do with her and when (as I suggested to you earlier), then I'd never ask her again. I'd say 70% of the time I'd get a "yes" on the third try. It's a stupid game a lot of girls play (or at least they did back when I was dating). Man I don't miss all that. Glad I'm married. :)

jag

:up:

Three strikes is for more than just baseball. It's a policy I live by with the ladies myself.

[Val]

eh let em both know . jealously raises your stock , its all good.

No it doesn't. Girls like exclusivity, knowing the guy you are considering going out with is interested on someone else makes you feel like a "second choice" and that is really bad.

[Gilpesh]

:up:

Three strikes is for more than just baseball. It's a policy I live by with the ladies myself.

Eh, do the one strike rule. Saves time.

[Superman79]

One who knows you are also interested in the other? Yeah that could be very bad.

Or it could be good, as it makes him seem desirable, and it is a truth for both women and men: we always want something after we know someone else wants it too.

Ask them both out Ash, just be up front if they ask about things. Until you are "exclusive" with one, you are just meeting new people. Now of course, if you decide you are really into one of these girls / you become exclusive, then you are obligated to be honest and break off / have the friends talk with the other(s).

[Badger]

Eh, do the one strike rule. Saves time.

Also saves money in the condom department. :up::down

[Superman79]

Eh, do the one strike rule. Saves time.

yeah, but sometimes it's worth the chase.

[Gilpesh]

Also saves money in the condom department. :up::down

Pffft. You don't ask for surprise sex!

yeah, but sometimes it's worth the chase.

Screw the chase. :o

[Badger]

Pffft. You don't ask for surprise sex!

Still gotta wrap the weasel. :up:

[Superman79]

Screw the chase. :o

the chase is half the fun...it's like hunting, just without the rifles :oldrazz:

[Gilpesh]

the chase is half the fun...it's like hunting, just without the rifles :oldrazz:

Meh. Chases blow when you always seem to end up losing the person.

[Superman79]

Meh. Chases blow when you always seem to end up losing the person.

sounds like someone is a wee bit bitter. :csad:

[Gilpesh]

sounds like someone is a wee bit bitter. :csad:

Realistic! :cmad:

[Badger]

Realistic! :cmad:

Sorry, keep your chin up lil' buddy. :csad:

[Superman79]

Realistic! :cmad:

and bitter.

Trust me, as a fellow bitter man, I can sense the strength of "the Bitterness" coursing through your veins young padawan ;) :vader:

[Ash J. Williams]

Or it could be good, as it makes him seem desirable, and it is a truth for both women and men: we always want something after we know someone else wants it too.

Ask them both out Ash, just be up front if they ask about things. Until you are "exclusive" with one, you are just meeting new people. Now of course, if you decide you are really into one of these girls / you become exclusive, then you are obligated to be honest and break off / have the friends talk with the other(s).
I know each girl form a different place, though.

[Badger]

I know each girl form a different place, though.

If you say MySpace and Facebook, so help me God, I will hunt you down. :cmad:

[Ash J. Williams]

If you say MySpace and Facebook, so help me God, I will hunt you down. :cmad:
Nope.

[Superman79]

I know each girl form a different place, though.

either way, at some point you may have to chose one over the other, regardless of whether you know them from the same place, or they know/don't know each other...

Simple directions here:

1) Ask them both out on dates.
2) Take them out on said dates.
3) [if said dates go well] hang out with them (separately of course)
4) Depending on what your feelings say after a few dates/times hanging out, you may have to pick one because you decide you like one over the other.
5) Let the "non-picked" one know you have found a "relationship" and can no longer date her. You can offer to remain friends but that often goes awry.
6) Continue to date and bang the hell out of the girl you chose.

**Caveat here in that of course, the girls in question have to want to continue said dating.


Point here being: ASK THEM OUT!!!! :up:

[Gilpesh]

either way, at some point you may have to chose one over the other, regardless of whether you know them from the same place, or they know/don't know each other...

Simple directions here:

1) Ask them both out on dates.
2) Take them out on said dates.
3) [if said dates go well] hang out with them (separately of course)
4) Depending on what your feelings say after a few dates/times hanging out, you may have to pick one because you decide you like one over the other.
5) Let the "non-picked" one know you have found a "relationship" and can no longer date her. You can offer to remain friends but that often goes awry.
6) Continue to date and bang the hell out of the girl you chose.

**Caveat here in that of course, the girls in question have to want to continue said dating.


Point here being: ASK THEM OUT!!!! :up:

http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b147/gilpeshfreeman/Stupid%20Comics/Monogamy.jpg

[ShadowBoxing]

If you say MySpace and Facebook, so help me God, I will hunt you down. :cmad:
hahahahaha.

[Gary Glitter]

Myspace and facebook, among other i-web sites, usually contain sexual predators and people who arent even what their picture looks like *akward*...its better to meet people in real life..not the i-net..unless u know for sure who it is...like brother or cousin or some friend/relative...

[Ash J. Williams]

either way, at some point you may have to chose one over the other, regardless of whether you know them from the same place, or they know/don't know each other...

Simple directions here:

1) Ask them both out on dates.
2) Take them out on said dates.
3) [if said dates go well] hang out with them (separately of course)
4) Depending on what your feelings say after a few dates/times hanging out, you may have to pick one because you decide you like one over the other.
5) Let the "non-picked" one know you have found a "relationship" and can no longer date her. You can offer to remain friends but that often goes awry.
6) Continue to date and bang the hell out of the girl you chose.

**Caveat here in that of course, the girls in question have to want to continue said dating.


Point here being: ASK THEM OUT!!!! :up:
Ok, well, that's good stuff. The other girl has expressed interest in seeing a movie with me, so I kinda wanna go for it.

[Ghostvirus]

So what is going on with your "situation" DV8? I haven't been near a computer for a week.

[Badger]

Ok, well, that's good stuff. The other girl has expressed interest in seeing a movie with me, so I kinda wanna go for it.

YAY!!!

[Superman79]

Ok, well, that's good stuff. The other girl has expressed interest in seeing a movie with me, so I kinda wanna go for it.

DO IT!!! You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Just make sure you do something before or after the movie so you guys can talk and bond. :up:

[Ash J. Williams]

DO IT!!! You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Just make sure you do something before or after the movie so you guys can talk and bond. :up:
Alright. Next time I see her, I'll talk to her about it.

[Superman79]

Alright. Next time I see her, I'll talk to her about it.

Good man. Just remember one word: confidence. You'll do well :up:

[Ash J. Williams]

Good man. Just remember one word: confidence. You'll do well :up:
Groovy.

[Superman79]

Groovy.

Just remember one other thing:

hold off on telling her to "give you some sugar baby" til about the 3rd date ok??? ;)

[Ash J. Williams]

Just remember one other thing:

hold off on telling her to "give you some sugar baby" til about the 3rd date ok??? ;)
Yeah, you bet.

[Gilpesh]

Groovy.

No, he meant the movie Confidence.

You should show her that.

[Ash J. Williams]

No, he meant the movie Confidence.

You should show her that.
She wants to see the Alvin movie.

[Metamorpho1977]

Let her watch Fatal Attraction

[Superman79]

She wants to see the Alvin movie.

Then take her. The movie should be something she'll enjoy and be comfortable with...this will put her in a good mood and make you the good guy

[Superman79]

No, he meant the movie Confidence.

You should show her that.

Dammit Bitter-man...don't help!!! :cmad::oldrazz:

[Gilpesh]

Dammit Bitter-man...don't help!!! :cmad::oldrazz:

Actually, it may have been a joke. But the movie Confidence is quite good and the lady should enjoy it just as much as a guy would. Plus, it's a dvd... so that means it would be a private screening of just the two of them. :whatever:

[Superman79]

Actually, it may have been a joke. But the movie Confidence is quite good and the lady should enjoy it just as much as a guy would. Plus, it's a dvd... so that means it would be a private screening of just the two of them. :whatever:

I was joking too...hence the :oldrazz:-face after the :cmad:-face.

And you are right...it IS a good flick. Highly underrated.

[DV8]

She wants to see the Alvin movie.

Def take her to the Alvin movie . . . make sure you ask her in person this time, and it would be nice to plan to get coffee or food or something afterwards, so you can both discuss the movie as well as have some friendly roundabout convo in general . . .

make sure you get a hug at the end of the night, and I would sneak a peck on the cheek . . . what's it gonna hurt?

this sets you up for round 2 :up:

[CrypticOne]

Def take her to the Alvin movie . . . make sure you ask her in person this time, and it would be nice to plan to get coffee or food or something afterwards, so you can both discuss the movie as well as have some friendly roundabout convo in general . . .

make sure you get a hug at the end of the night, and I would sneak a peck on the cheek . . . what's it gonna hurt?

this sets you up for round 2 :up:

Dang, this is some good advice. I know its not directed at me, but you give good tips, friend.

[DV8]

so I don't know if you guys remember, but there's this chick that I've been trying to 'get with', 'talk to' for like forever . . . she always ends up screwing me over, and now she's kind of sweatin again :~S

man . . . I REALLY dig this chick; we have a great time together, share the same sense of humor, and she's absolutely stunning . . .

I think she starts to sweat because of a lack of attention, but she throws these off-key hints at me sometimes . . . I just don't fkn get it . . .

her bday recently passed, and she had a party (which I wasn't invited to), but I played if off like no big deal . . . . I think she didn't invite me due to spacial restraints . . . .

anyway, like I said, I played if off, and it was such a crappy weekend that she decided to have another party the following Friday . . . I talked to her that Monday (she works at my job), and she basically invited me this time, but I elected not to show up haha

well . . . she said she was looking for me, yadda, yadda, and I was like "yeah right", jokingly . . . I said that maybe we could catch some dinner sometime since I missed it . . .

well I didn't go visit her yesterday, and she texted me saying "she just wanted to check on me" and I was like oh that's nice, and sent her part of this Lil Wayne song lyric (don't ask), and basically she's just being overly nice . . .

today she called me as soon as she got home and was like "why didn't you come see me today" :confused: and then she said she called me cuz she saw a picture of a hot dog on the side of a truck :dry: I was like "so when you think of wieners, you think of me . . . " :D :dry:

I don't know her deal . . . I don't know if she really likes me, if she's just playing some kind of game; if she wants me for a friend, or if she's just trying to use me for food or other goods :~S

[DV8]

Dang, this is some good advice. I know its not directed at me, but you give good tips, friend.

thanks ;) hindsight is always 20/20 though . . .

[Superman79]

thanks ;) hindsight is always 20/20 though . . .

Ain't it nice when the youngsters can learn from our mistakes/successes/endeavors??? :woot:

[Scarlet spidey]

I don't know her deal . . . I don't know if she really likes me, if she's just playing some kind of game; if she wants me for a friend, or if she's just trying to use me for food or other goods :~S
Ask her.:p

[DV8]

Ask her.:p

I have before, and she's just very illusive about our whole 'situation' . . . I'm not even gonna sweat it, though . . . I'll just keep going along nonchalantly, and if something happens, it happens . . . I'm not gonna try to make any moves or anything (cuz everytime I'd try in the past, she'd shoot me down) . . . . plus there's too many other fish in the sea to worry about one stupid girl (as gorgeous and colorful of a personality as she is) :whatever:

[Ash J. Williams]

Then take her. The movie should be something she'll enjoy and be comfortable with...this will put her in a good mood and make you the good guy
Ok, I'll be like, "So...you still wanna see the Alvin movie?"
Def take her to the Alvin movie . . . make sure you ask her in person this time, and it would be nice to plan to get coffee or food or something afterwards, so you can both discuss the movie as well as have some friendly roundabout convo in general . . .

make sure you get a hug at the end of the night, and I would sneak a peck on the cheek . . . what's it gonna hurt?

this sets you up for round 2 :up:
Yes, yes, I can see how that would work out. I'll see her either Sunday or next Wednesday, so I ask her then.

[Metamorpho1977]

If all else fails, Ash, tell her "Show me your boobs" It'll show her that you mean business. Girls love the funny cocky guy.

[ShadowBoxing]

If she doesn't show them, just rip off her shirt...you know you wanna...

[Ash J. Williams]

Um...ok.

[Metamorpho1977]

While you're walking, hold hands.

[ShadowBoxing]

Now, now he is seeking actually advice here...I, ya know what...say what you want.

[Superman79]

Ok, I'll be like, "So...you still wanna see the Alvin movie?"

Yes, yes, I can see how that would work out. I'll see her either Sunday or next Wednesday, so I ask her then.

Good call. Let us know how it goes.

And when she says 'yes' to your question (above), then say "well then why don't we go see it Friday night? We can hit the movie then maybe grab (insert food here: coffee, ice cream, a beer, etc.). Whaddaya think?"

Just remember, when asking: be CONFIDENT :up:

[Erzengel]

I'm of a different mind of the whole "asking" vs. "telling" a girl you are going out. If she digs you, I'd suggest the latter.

Not stammering "Uh, well, if you want, maybe, if you're free, sometime, we can see a movie, perhaps?" :down

Instead, "Oh, you want to see such and such movie?" "I'll take you this weekend." :up:

[Superman79]

I'm of a different mind of the whole "asking" vs. "telling" a girl you are going out. If she digs you, I'd suggest the latter.

Not stammering "Uh, well, if you want, maybe, if you're free, sometime, we can see a movie, perhaps?" :down

Instead, "Oh, you want to see such and such movie?" "I'll take you this weekend." :up:

I agree, but if I'm not 100% sure she digs, I go with the approach I listed above but in a tone where it's 'asking, but really I'm telling you this'...you know what I mean??

[Ash J. Williams]

Good call. Let us know how it goes.

And when she says 'yes' to your question (above), then say "well then why don't we go see it Friday night? We can hit the movie then maybe grab (insert food here: coffee, ice cream, a beer, etc.). Whaddaya think?"

Just remember, when asking: be CONFIDENT :up:
Yeah, sounds good. I figure we're gonna see the movie at the local mall because it has a theater and a food court, so we won't have to go anywhere.

[Scarlet spidey]

Yeah, sounds good. I figure we're gonna see the movie at the local mall because it has a theater and a food court, so we won't have to go anywhere.Do you have a car? Cause driving her to a special place to eat might not be a bad idea.
Lots of time to talk in the car, too.:)

[Ash J. Williams]

Do you have a car? Cause driving her to a special place to eat might not be a bad idea.
Lots of time to talk in the car, too.:)
No, I don't drive.

[Scarlet spidey]

No, I don't drive.Everything is ruined.:(

[ShadowBoxing]

Yeah, sounds good. I figure we're gonna see the movie at the local mall because it has a theater and a food court, so we won't have to go anywhere.
I don't know what she likes personally, but I'd avoid the food court. I certainly wouldn't go "all out" the first time, but pick a restaurant that you enjoy and is of some quality. I'd say somewhere "casual", on the level of a Ruby Tuesday's or even an Applebee's. I've had success with Doc Chey's and a few of these more yuppie chains too.

Also as Scarlet here suggested, if you pick locations that aren't exactly next to each other you'll be able to drive from location to location which will give you a good amount of time to spark up idle chit chat.

Make sure to look her in the eyes when you're talking to her to, just not while you're driving, then you'll get in an accident.

[Ash J. Williams]

Everything is ruined.:(
Not necessairly.

[ShadowBoxing]

No, I don't drive.
Do you have any brothers or sisters who do? It's generally a littler "cooler" if you can get an older sibling or friend to do it.

[Ash J. Williams]

Do you have any brothers or sisters who do? It's generally a littler "cooler" if you can get an older sibling or friend to do it.
Perhaps I have some friends.

[Scarlet spidey]

I don't know what she likes personally, but I'd avoid the food court. I certainly wouldn't go "all out" the first time, but pick a restaurant that you enjoy and is of some quality. I'd say somewhere "casual", on the level of a Ruby Tuesday's or even an Applebee's. I've had success with Doc Chey's and a few of these more yuppie chains too.

Also as Scarlet here suggested, if you pick locations that aren't exactly next to each other you'll be able to drive from location to location which will give you a good amount of time to spark up idle chit chat.

Make sure to look her in the eyes when you're talking to her to, just not while you're driving, then you'll get in an accident.

Yeah, I make this mistake a lot. Almost got in an accident once, too lol.

And yeah, I kinda would recommend against the food court. The only time I'd go there for a date would be if I've know and been with the girl for quite a while and you're just already in the area.

[ShadowBoxing]

Perhaps I have some friends.
See if you can rope one into chaufering you around a little. Pay him if necessary. It may prove worthwhile.

[ShadowBoxing]

Yeah, I make this mistake a lot. Almost got in an accident once, too lol.

And yeah, I kinda would recommend against the food court. The only time I'd go there for a date would be if I've know and been with the girl for quite a while and you're just already in the area.
The only time I go to a food court is...well, never, I do bodybuilding, I can't eat that crap...but if I were shopping with a girlfriend and maybe it was Christmas and we were gonna be doing a lot of it I might stop there for a bite.

[Ash J. Williams]

The only time I go to a food court is...well, never, I do bodybuilding, I can't eat that crap...but if I were shopping with a girlfriend and maybe it was Christmas and we were gonna be doing a lot of it I might stop there for a bite.
Well...what if we see the movie first and get ice cream from the ice cream place in the mall?

[ShadowBoxing]

Well...what if we see the movie first and get ice cream from the ice cream place in the mall?
Ice cream would be fine.

[The Original Bamfer]

Unless she's lactose intolerant.

[Metamorpho1977]

if your mall has a "Curves" gym in it like the one near me, a fun thing would be to get an ice cream cone and stand in front of the gym and eat ice cream while all the fat chicks are trying to lose weight. that's what I do.

[ShadowBoxing]

Hahahaha...f***in' curves.

[Metamorpho1977]

I don't know why they call it Curves, none of the girls in there have curves plural, they just have one big curve.

[Scarlet spidey]

Hey, I've gone one.
I've been dating this girl for a little over a month now, we aren't really serious yet, but I hope that we will be in the future, and I want to get her a gift for Christmas. The only problem is she seems like the type of girl who would refuse a gift, unless it's something small. So what do you guys think would be a good small gift idea?

[CrypticOne]

Hey, I've gone one.
I've been dating this girl for a little over a month now, we aren't really serious yet, but I hope that we will be in the future, and I want to get her a gift for Christmas. The only problem is she seems like the type of girl who would refuse a gift, unless it's something small. So what do you guys think would be a good small gift idea?

A teddy bear, with something on it that says, "Merry Christmas!"

[Erzengel]

Hey, I've gone one.
I've been dating this girl for a little over a month now, we aren't really serious yet, but I hope that we will be in the future, and I want to get her a gift for Christmas. The only problem is she seems like the type of girl who would refuse a gift, unless it's something small. So what do you guys think would be a good small gift idea?

I started dating a girl like 2 months and I got her an anklet. It was like $150 or something so I felt that was "small".

I know you only have been dating her a month or so but I'm sure you know her pretty well that you could get her something "quaint".

[Gary Glitter]

if your mall has a "Curves" gym in it like the one near me, a fun thing would be to get an ice cream cone and stand in front of the gym and eat ice cream while all the fat chicks are trying to lose weight. that's what I do.

thats hilarious! :woot: :grin:

[Ash J. Williams]

Ice cream would be fine.
Alright, sounds good.

[Bishop]

Hey, I've gone one.
I've been dating this girl for a little over a month now, we aren't really serious yet, but I hope that we will be in the future, and I want to get her a gift for Christmas. The only problem is she seems like the type of girl who would refuse a gift, unless it's something small. So what do you guys think would be a good small gift idea?

something nauseatingly cute, like one of those stuffed animals that chants 'i wuv you' endlessly.

you could easily rig it to explode if you get sick of her as well.

[CrypticOne]

I was just wondering if you are polite about telling a girl you like her and she smacks you, is that like....natural? Or is that supposed to happen? I've never had a girlfriend, and you know, I'm in my senior year of high school. Just trying to get one before prom.

[Mister J]

If your hand wasn't on her ass when you asked, I'd say that's pretty unnatural.

On the bright side, with the way schools overreact to student behavior these days, you could probably get this girl suspended from prom for smacking you. Providing her with such information may get her to reconsider her answer. Just a thought.

[Metamorpho1977]

I was just wondering if you are polite about telling a girl you like her and she smacks you, is that like....natural? Or is that supposed to happen? I've never had a girlfriend, and you know, I'm in my senior year of high school. Just trying to get one before prom.

Was it a hard smack or just something light? I had a girl smack me one time, but that was in 7th grade and I think it had something to do with me asking if her boobs were real.

[CrypticOne]

Was it a hard smack or just something light? I had a girl smack me one time, but that was in 7th grade and I think it had something to do with me asking if her boobs were real.

I'd say it was a pretty good smack, I didn't know the chick, and she was a crush of mine, but whatever, just got to move on right?

I was just thinking, maybe some guys aren't mean't to have chicks in their lives. I want one, but its very hard to get one, to get one that is loyal....

But maybe my chick will come in the future, I mean, I'm in high school, I should just worry about that for now, and build my foundation for life up.

[Scarlet spidey]

I'd say it was a pretty good smack, I didn't know the chick, and she was a crush of mine, but whatever, just got to move on right?

I was just thinking, maybe some guys aren't mean't to have chicks in their lives. I want one, but its very hard to get one, to get one that is loyal....

But maybe my chick will come in the future, I mean, I'm in high school, I should just worry about that for now, and build my foundation for life up.
What exactly did you say...?

[CrypticOne]

What exactly did you say...?

"Hello, I was just wondering....whats your name?"

"Kayla, why?"

"Oh, its cause I've had this crush on you, for awhile now. I just got the guts to ask you after a year, so yeah....how's your day?"

"Okay...."

"Oh, well, I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime?...."

SMACK!

Now I was the most polite and gentle I could be, I don't know what I did, I kept eye contact, a smile on my face. Its been boggling my mind for sometime now.

[Scarlet spidey]

"Hello, I was just wondering....whats your name?"

"Kayla, why?"

"Oh, its cause I've had this crush on you, for awhile now. I just got the guts to ask you after a year, so yeah....how's your day?"

"Okay...."

"Oh, well, I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime?...."

SMACK!

Now I was the most polite and gentle I could be, I don't know what I did, I kept eye contact, a smile on my face. Its been boggling my mind for sometime now.
She must be completely insane. You're better off.

[ShadowBoxing]

"Hello, I was just wondering....whats your name?"

"Kayla, why?"

"Oh, its cause I've had this crush on you, for awhile now. I just got the guts to ask you after a year, so yeah....how's your day?"

"Okay...."

"Oh, well, I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime?...."

SMACK!

Now I was the most polite and gentle I could be, I don't know what I did, I kept eye contact, a smile on my face. Its been boggling my mind for sometime now.
You told her, in essence, you've been obsessing over her for a year and didn't have the guts to talk to her. Any rational person would find that unnerving if they were in her shoes. Opportunities with women have about a week or two, tops, window on them. If you can't ask someone out quickly, or at least build some rapport and relationship with them quickly you're going to lose them forever.

[amazingfantasy15]

You told her, in essence, you've been obsessing over her for a year and didn't have the guts to talk to her. Any rational person would find that unnerving if they were in her shoes. Opportunities with women have about a week or two, tops, window on them. If you can't ask someone out quickly, or at least build some rapport and relationship with them quickly you're going to lose them forever.

Yeah, ShadowBoxing has the right answer, especially since you didn't even know her name. Should have built things more slowly, a little conversation first, not just blurt out "I've liked you for a year, but didn't even have the guts to find out your name"

[Erzengel]

Well the word "creepy" comes to mind as she probably now envisions, people staring at her, probably making her paranoid.

[Superman79]

Well the word "creepy" comes to mind as she probably now envisions, people staring at her, probably making her paranoid.

Just because she's now paranoid doesn't mean that Cryptic isn't out to get her

"It puts the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose again" :p

[amazingfantasy15]

This doesn't mean you're never meant to have a girlfriend though CypticOne, you're still in high school there's plenty of time. Just next time build a little bit of a rapport with a girl first before asking her out. Asking her name, then saying you've been interested in her for a year and asking her out is way too quick, she only said three words to you.

[Superman79]

This doesn't mean you're never meant to have a girlfriend though CypticOne, you're still in high school there's plenty of time. Just next time build a little bit of a rapport with a girl first before asking her out. Asking her name, then saying you've been interested in her for a year and asking her out is way too quick, she only said three words to you.

Indeed. to expand on fantasy's post heres a small step by step checklist (feel free to add guys if you feel I miss anything)

1. See Pretty girl
2. Say casual 'hello' to pretty girl
3. Have light conversations/essentially 'befreind' pretty girl
3A. DO NOT ENTER THE FRIEND ZONE!!!
4. Upon establishing some similar interests/finding the pretty girl has the type of personality you would mesh well with: Ask her out.
4A. BE CONFIDENT when asking her out.
$B. BE SPECIFIC...don't just say, 'do you wanna go out sometime?', give a specific day/weekend, and a specific plan (see 4C).
4C. Ask to do something where you can converse: mini-golf, bowling, movie then ice cream, (since you're in high school) a school dance, something simple.
5. Take her out (provided she says 'yes'). Be cool and just have fun.
6. Pay attention to how she is acting toward you, look for indicators of interest like flirting, touching, etc. (We can expand on those later)
7. Walk her to her door. Tell her you had a great time (if you did).
8. At the end of the night, IF things went well, give her a kiss on the cheek (if things went REALLY REALLY well, then go for lips, but otherwise play it safe). At the VERY least, end the night with a hug if you don't feel the peck is warranted.
9. Talk to her as you see her again (whether its the next day or whatnot.)
10. Ask her out again as warranted (just not immediately the next day).

Now mind you, this is a VERY VERY simplified version of your basic 'ask out' scenario...but it is a start to guide you. :up:

[DV8]

Well the word "creepy" comes to mind as she probably now envisions, people staring at her, probably making her paranoid.

yeah . . . I mean, telling a girl you've liked her for a year w/o knowing her name is basically saying "I've been looking at your ass and boobs and stuff for the past YEAR! girl, whassyo name?"

[DV8]

Ash, I agree that ice cream is a nice touch; chicks like ice cream . . . and yeah, I forgot to mention this, but as Erz and some others have suggested, you need to be more confident when you're talking to these ladies . . .

don't be so passive . . . that's telling a girl subliminally that you don't really care (even if you really do) . . . you have to lay down the law but discreetly . . . not too agressive, but just matter of fact . . . :up:

[Erzengel]

I'd say it was a pretty good smack, I didn't know the chick, and she was a crush of mine, but whatever, just got to move on right?

I was just thinking, maybe some guys aren't mean't to have chicks in their lives. I want one, but its very hard to get one, to get one that is loyal....

But maybe my chick will come in the future, I mean, I'm in high school, I should just worry about that for now, and build my foundation for life up.
Seriously drop the overdramatic, I'm a loner schtick because honestly it's bs. You are no different than almost every other guy who's been in your situation at one time or another. You're 18 not 58. You have a LONG road before you can start spouting I'm not meant to have chicks.

[CrypticOne]

Seriously drop the overdramatic, I'm a loner schtick because honestly it's bs. You are no different than almost every other guy who's been in your situation at one time or another. You're 18 not 58. You have a LONG road before you can start spouting I'm not meant to have chicks.

But I guarentee that most people my age have at least had one girlfriend, yeah? I'm not a loner dude, I have friends, just can't get a girl.

[Erzengel]

Do you know how many people think back at their relationships at high school and don't even count them as anything significant. Like thinking back if you had a gf in Jr. High.

[Gary Glitter]

OK, quick question for the "guys".... what's the deal with the friend zone?
i mean yea there is a barrier for a guy and a gurl but really..

[Bishop]

"Hello, I was just wondering....whats your name?"

"Kayla, why?"

"Oh, its cause I've had this crush on you, for awhile now. I just got the guts to ask you after a year, so yeah....how's your day?"

"Okay...."

"Oh, well, I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime?...."

SMACK!

Now I was the most polite and gentle I could be, I don't know what I did, I kept eye contact, a smile on my face. Its been boggling my mind for sometime now.


bah, you never reveal you have a passing interest in her beyond casual sex. you made yourself vulnerable and she battered you as a result.



then again, i've been going through a seemingly endless dry patch for months, so you may want to take the advice of someone who yields a result other than abject failure

[Erzengel]

OK, quick question for the "guys".... what's the deal with the friend zone?
i mean yea there is a barrier for a guy and a gurl but really..
Guy's excuse as to why women aren't attracted to them. :o Women are either interested in you or not. Befriending them in an attempt to get them to like you is usually the wrong way to go and usually just ends up with the guy being bitter.

[Gary Glitter]

Guy's excuse as to why women aren't attracted to them. :o Women are either interested in you or not. Befriending them in an attempt to get them to like you is usually the wrong way to go and usually just ends up with the guy being bitter.

oh...hm..thats weird..that must be why guys want to be my bf instead on just my friend so i can get to know them...

[Superman79]

Do you know how many people think back at their relationships at high school and don't even count them as anything significant. Like thinking back if you had a gf in Jr. High.

**Raises hand in response** :woot:

[CorpusBlack]

"Hello, I was just wondering....whats your name?"

"Kayla, why?"

"Oh, its cause I've had this crush on you, for awhile now. I just got the guts to ask you after a year, so yeah....how's your day?"

"Okay...."

"Oh, well, I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime?...."

SMACK!

Now I was the most polite and gentle I could be, I don't know what I did, I kept eye contact, a smile on my face. Its been boggling my mind for sometime now.

I would've headbutted her.

[CorpusBlack]

OK, quick question for the "guys".... what's the deal with the friend zone?
i mean yea there is a barrier for a guy and a gurl but really..

Could you elaborate a bit more?

[Superman79]

I would've headbutted her.

And thats why women are afraid of you. :o

[CorpusBlack]

And thats why women are afraid of you. :o

I'd rather have them fear me. I like awkward sex.

[Superman79]

I'd rather have them fear me. I like awkward sex.


Is this before or after you make them put on lotion in the pit in your basement?? :huh:

[CorpusBlack]

Is this before or after you make them put on lotion in the pit in your basement?? :huh:

We don't have basements in FL due to the aquifer.

[Superman79]

We don't have basements in FL due to the aquifer.


Don't bother me with technicalities...I have no time for trivia :oldrazz:

[CorpusBlack]

Don't bother me with technicalities...I have no time for trivia :oldrazz:

It was just a response to the question. I didn't intend to clog your mind w/ unimportant trivia. I apologize. :grin:

[CrypticOne]

What I don't understand is why women these days go after the "gangsters." Can someone explain that?

Or how can you tell that a chick likes you? How would you start a casual conversation with them? Most girls just roll their eyes at me or give me "don't even try it" looks. Its kind of depressing.

I have become pretty good friends with the girl of my dreams though, which is a pretty good feeling for me. I love talking to her. So thats a high point.

If their are any girls on here, what do you guys look for in a guy? I looks, style, personality?

[Bishop]

''What I don't understand is why women these days go after the "gangsters." Can someone explain that? ''



girls really hate guys that make sweeping generalisations. :p

[Superman79]

What I don't understand is why women these days go after the "gangsters." Can someone explain that?

That is because the girls you are referring to are going through a mindless phase. That and the 'gangsters' have that air of confidence about them that attract women. Let's put it simply though, you don't want a girl who digs the 'gangster' type. Something tells me those girls wouldn't be your type (judging from your posts). Just keep your eyes open, women who like regular guys are out there, and there are even more of them in college...ah sweet college. :D

Or how can you tell that a chick likes you? How would you start a casual conversation with them? Most girls just roll their eyes at me or give me "don't even try it" looks. Its kind of depressing.

How are you trying to start these conversations?? Are you just reandomly walking up and talking...or is it during some activity or what?? I need more info to dissect this question.

As for a girl being interested...well,first you have to talk to them to gauge things, but without talking a girl can show interest with eye contact, with playing with her hair a lot while looking at you (sort of a come hither signal) or she can show interest by being the first to approach, or always timing it so she's in the hall, etc. when you are.


I have become pretty good friends with the girl of my dreams though, which is a pretty good feeling for me. I love talking to her. So thats a high point.
Congrats. Wait is this the one that smacked you??? :huh:
As for being friends, sadly, that may be all it is. Once you're in the friend zone it's REALLY though to get out, and then as Erz stated, can lead to bitterness.

If their are any girls on here, what do you guys look for in a guy? I looks, style, personality?

I'm not a chick, but I will tell you, what they look for varies from girl to girl just as no snowflake is the same, no woman is looking for the exact same thing as another. Just be yourself man, relax, enjoy life and the girl that likes you will pop up. You always find the best relationships when your NOT looking.

[Ghostvirus]

So I just watched Little Children, & I got a great idea for a date. I am going to take her to dinner, & if things go well, I am going to have her park outside a school playground at night with no headlights. Then....

[CrypticOne]

What I don't understand is why women these days go after the "gangsters." Can someone explain that?

That is because the girls you are referring to are going through a mindless phase. That and the 'gangsters' have that air of confidence about them that attract women. Let's put it simply though, you don't want a girl who digs the 'gangster' type. Something tells me those girls wouldn't be your type (judging from your posts). Just keep your eyes open, women who like regular guys are out there, and there are even more of them in college...ah sweet college. :D

Or how can you tell that a chick likes you? How would you start a casual conversation with them? Most girls just roll their eyes at me or give me "don't even try it" looks. Its kind of depressing.

How are you trying to start these conversations?? Are you just reandomly walking up and talking...or is it during some activity or what?? I need more info to dissect this question.

As for a girl being interested...well,first you have to talk to them to gauge things, but without talking a girl can show interest with eye contact, with playing with her hair a lot while looking at you (sort of a come hither signal) or she can show interest by being the first to approach, or always timing it so she's in the hall, etc. when you are.


I have become pretty good friends with the girl of my dreams though, which is a pretty good feeling for me. I love talking to her. So thats a high point.
Congrats. Wait is this the one that smacked you??? :huh:
As for being friends, sadly, that may be all it is. Once you're in the friend zone it's REALLY though to get out, and then as Erz stated, can lead to bitterness.

If their are any girls on here, what do you guys look for in a guy? I looks, style, personality?

I'm not a chick, but I will tell you, what they look for varies from girl to girl just as no snowflake is the same, no woman is looking for the exact same thing as another. Just be yourself man, relax, enjoy life and the girl that likes you will pop up. You always find the best relationships when your NOT looking.

Nah, the chick that I smacked me, I don't really see her anymore.

I usually talk to the girls that give me weird looks when we're in class, if we get put into groups or when they stare at me a couple times, so I just say something, you know?

Thanks man, for the advice. It sure does mean alot.

[Ash J. Williams]

Indeed. to expand on fantasy's post heres a small step by step checklist (feel free to add guys if you feel I miss anything)

1. See Pretty girl
2. Say casual 'hello' to pretty girl
3. Have light conversations/essentially 'befreind' pretty girl
3A. DO NOT ENTER THE FRIEND ZONE!!!
4. Upon establishing some similar interests/finding the pretty girl has the type of personality you would mesh well with: Ask her out.
4A. BE CONFIDENT when asking her out.
$B. BE SPECIFIC...don't just say, 'do you wanna go out sometime?', give a specific day/weekend, and a specific plan (see 4C).
4C. Ask to do something where you can converse: mini-golf, bowling, movie then ice cream, (since you're in high school) a school dance, something simple.
5. Take her out (provided she says 'yes'). Be cool and just have fun.
6. Pay attention to how she is acting toward you, look for indicators of interest like flirting, touching, etc. (We can expand on those later)
7. Walk her to her door. Tell her you had a great time (if you did).
8. At the end of the night, IF things went well, give her a kiss on the cheek (if things went REALLY REALLY well, then go for lips, but otherwise play it safe). At the VERY least, end the night with a hug if you don't feel the peck is warranted.
9. Talk to her as you see her again (whether its the next day or whatnot.)
10. Ask her out again as warranted (just not immediately the next day).

Now mind you, this is a VERY VERY simplified version of your basic 'ask out' scenario...but it is a start to guide you. :up:
Quite useful for a lot of us.

[Ash J. Williams]

And...looks like I'll be asking her out tomorrow night.

[Superman79]

And...looks like I'll be asking her out tomorrow night.

Good. Best of Luck to you my friend :up:

[Metamorpho1977]

I'd say it was a pretty good smack, I didn't know the chick, and she was a crush of mine, but whatever, just got to move on right?

I was just thinking, maybe some guys aren't mean't to have chicks in their lives. I want one, but its very hard to get one, to get one that is loyal....

But maybe my chick will come in the future, I mean, I'm in high school, I should just worry about that for now, and build my foundation for life up.

What did you say to her right before she smacked you?

[CrypticOne]

What did you say to her right before she smacked you?

Well it was along the lines, if we could hang out sometime. It was a couple years back. I didn't mean it in a way that would offend her, I was asking like if we would be able to get to know eachother more. Apparenly you never ask girls if they want to hang out.

[Superman79]

Well it was along the lines, if we could hang out sometime. It was a couple years back. I didn't mean it in a way that would offend her, I was asking like if we would be able to get to know eachother more. Apparenly you never ask girls if they want to hang out.

I think we established that its not so much the asking, but how you ask, and how you preface the asking. Thing is, first you have to develop rapport with her, then you ask to hang out. In this case, you failed to develop comfortable rapport with her.(of course her slapping you was a bit extreme) Don't worry, you'll get the hang of it.

[CrypticOne]

I think we established that its not so much the asking, but how you ask, and how you preface the asking. Thing is, first you have to develop rapport with her, then you ask to hang out. In this case, you failed to develop comfortable rapport with her.(of course her slapping you was a bit extreme) Don't worry, you'll get the hang of it.

Thanks man. You're right. All I need is some more development in that department, practice makes perfect, right? I just hope I don't get slapped again, HAHA. This is really a good place to come to for advice. Thanks guys. :up:

[Superman79]

I usually talk to the girls that give me weird looks when we're in class, if we get put into groups or when they stare at me a couple times, so I just say something, you know?

OK, one thing here, weird looks usually = bad.
pleasant looks = good.
Essentially, when initiating conversation, bring it into the situation. For example: When I am at a bar and see a girl standing at said bar I would like to speak with (modify this accordingly for your situation of course) I go to order a drink next to her. The service is slow about 90% of the time so I can usually drop 'wow...wonder who you have to kill to get a drink around here' or 'so do I need a signal flare to catch the bartenders attention'. I direct that in her general direction (not directly at her). Most of the time, if the girl is worth her salt, she'll respond. Ice broken. I then proceed to continue with the usual small talk 'what are you drinking' /' so what is your name' etc. Then if there is interest we continue conversing, if there is not we go our separate ways with a 'nice to meet you, have a good one.' Then at the very least I left her with a good impression in case we meet again under better circumstances. If there is interest, we talk for a bit and then I ask for the phone #. Majority of the time, I get it.

Basically, that is an example of what I do. Now agreed its a different setting/age group but the same principles apply to how you talk to/ initiate conversations. Its not the end all be all of how to do it, but its an example of casual initiation of a conversation.

Thanks man, for the advice. It sure does mean alot.

Glad to help. Frankly, if you younger guys can learn from Erz, SB, myself and company and the experiences we have had, then our victories and more importantly our mistakes, are all worth while. :up:

[Ash J. Williams]

Good. Best of Luck to you my friend :up:
Yeah. Can't back away this time.

[Superman79]

Yeah. Can't back away this time.

'Theres no easy way out, theres no shortcut home' :D

[Erzengel]

A little over a week for Ghostrider87 and Jill.

[Superman79]

A little over a week for Ghostrider87 and Jill.


I'm waiting with bated breath. I'm more excited for the results of this than I was for the opening of Casino Royale!!! :oldrazz:

Think he'll come back to tell us how it went???

[ShadowBoxing]

A little over a week for Ghostrider87 and Jill.
It'll be a shame, they were such a cute couple. I'm waiting on pins and needles to make the "GhostRider87: It's January 2008, you know what that means..." thread.

[Superman79]

And...looks like I'll be asking her out tomorrow night.

so...did you ask her out Ash????? What'd she say??

[Superman79]

It'll be a shame, they were such a cute couple. I'm waiting on pins and needles to make the "GhostRider87: It's January 2008, you know what that means..." thread.

hells yeah, that should be good for at least a week of entertainment...even longer if GR87 is back for it :up:

[DV8]

Lol! I don't think GR87 will be returning to the hype under that Alias any longer . . . he'll pry pick a different name that's so clever we will never discover it's him . . . something like GR78 . . .

[Superman79]

^^ Lol.

[ShadowBoxing]

You give him far to much credit: he's just some mentally autistic kid who has access to broadband.