MS. MARVEL: "You chauvinist pig! How dare you call yourself a superhero!"
CAPTAIN MARVEL: "Damn Carol. The most I ever asked you for was a sandwich."
MS. MARVEL: "I think you're all [BLEEP] in the head. We're ten hours from the [BLEEP] fun park and you want to bail out. Well I'll tell you something. This is no longer a vacation. It's a quest. It's a quest for fun. I'm gonna have fun and you're gonna have fun. We're all gonna have so much [BLEEP] fun we'll need plastic surgeory to remove our godamn smiles. You'll be whistling 'Zip-A-Dee Doo-Dah' out of you're [BLEEP]! I gotta be crazy! I'm on a pilgrimage to see a moose. Praise Marty Moose! Holy [BLEEP]!
CAPTAIN MARVEL: "Carol, do you want an Aspirin?"
MS. MARVEL: "Don't Touch!"
MS. MARVEL: "Hey! If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, #!$%less, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey **** he is! Hallelujah! Holy ****! Where's the Tylenol?"
CAPTAIN MARVEL: "This is the worst Christmas getaway ever."