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Old 07-31-2006, 01:33 AM   #1
OoAnd1
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Default My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Spider-Man 4: Race To A Cure

Story begins with life going pretty good for Spidey. Love/hate relationship with NYC like usual. He is now working at Doc Connor's lab. (No Lizard in film, Peter graduated college) He still takes pics for the Bugle and dates Betty. (No MJ or Gwen in this film. Storywise, it isn't needed anymore. Studio-wise, I don't like recasts and I doubt they will sign up for one soon.)

We are then introduced to Electronics Engineer Adrian Toomes who works with developing electromagnetic devices for an airline company. He has just been "demoted" due to his long battling sickness.

We then begin to learn that Spidey is becoming stronger (even defeats Rhino easy in short cameo), senses more accurate but is having nightmares. But soon he begins feeling ill (2 ill main characters, sense a theme?) and goes to the only man he trusts to analyze him as Spidey, Doc Connors. Connors informs him that for whatever reason that he gained his powers, his mutation is incomplete as well as his transformation. Spidey frankly asks, "So I'm going to turn into a monster? Some type of giant spider?". "In theory," responds Connors. "To be honest, you probably would not survive the transformation." (Thunder claps)..dun dun dun....

Back to Toomes where we learn that he has cancer due to his work over the years with electromagnetic waves. His battle with chemotherapy (lost all his hair due to chemo) is not improving his condition. After researching his condition he tries to contact Alistaire Smythe a technological genius, working on new technology using a radiation chamber to repair damaged, mutating or cancerous cells. Smythe is hoping it lets him walk again. The device shows good results on mice in everything but repairing spinal cord cells. Smythe is therefore a b*tch & offers no help to Toomes or society until he walks first.

Meanwhile, Spidey's odd condition gets more intense. His strength is still above normal but his nightmares and headaches are getting worse. He begins to wonder if this is really the end of him and if his uncle would be proud of the job he's done. (Input big 5-7 min action sequence here showing off Spidey's new skills: see in dark, more sticky hairs throughout body, ability to perform web-dome)

Toomes, upset and still with clearance, enters the research company with hired help. Toomes hires an albino hitman (Tombstone) to help him steal a harness used for flying using magnetic fields. No one is a match for Tombstone and the mission is a success. Vulture is born (still ill, but powerful due to the harness). Tombstone then introduces Vulture to someone he knows who "also loves toys", Herman Shultz.

Vulture pays the two $$$ for their services in a plan of entering Smythe's facility on the top floor of a REALLY tall building for the purpose of Vulture using it to cure him. Shultz, needing protective gear for two powerful devices that he developed, asks Vulture and Tombstone to steal a uniform made out of a special fabric that would absorb the blasts. (Input 10-15 min big heist and battle when Spidey intervenes.) Spidey gets Tombstone (and eventually information on Vulture's plan) but Vulture gets away with the uniform.

Spidey then questions the morality of getting to Smythe first for the same purpose instead of focusing to stop Vulture. He also wonders what effect the radiation would have on him. Would he go back to his usual Spidey-self or lose all powers entirely? Would he even survive? Deciding to do what's right, he takes off his glove due to an itch and sees that his skin is deformed. He takes off his mask in front of a mirror (off-screen) and he notices (audience gets a hint) that his face is now deformed as well. (Does Spidey have mutliple eyes?) Fearing this to be his final battle he webs off...On to the climax!

Shocker(for the first time in all his glory) and Vulture attack the facility from all angles. (Input military security vs. villians battling.) Spidey arrives and takes on both the villians and security(he's gentle with security). Spidey, too quick for Shocker's blasts finally takes him out. Spidey(and his massive headaches) enters the radiation chamber following Vulture. Door closes behind Spidey while Smythe, outside of the chamber, turns the radiation chamber to dangerous levels. Spidey and Vulture, unable to open the doors, are apparently doomed. But Spidey begins to transform..scaring the $h*t out of Smythe and Vulture. Spidey gets slightly bigger but grows a new arm(looks like a spider leg). Out of desperation Spidey begins slamming his new arm at the door. His new (but stronger) arm eventually knocks the door down, Spidey knocks out Smythe, and turns down the level of radiation. All three men are bombarded with the radiation. Spidey loses consciousness while still transforming. He then wakes...carefully takes off his mask and looks into a broken piece of glass. He's normal again (but touches a new pimple and smiles). Looking for survivors in the wreckage, he finds Smythe, badly deformed (and transformed into Spider-Slayer?) but there's no Vulture. (Survived?) In come police and military...out goes Spidey.

Shocker and Tombstone are now locked up but no word on Vulture. Spidey meets with Doc Connors and gets an A+ grade of health. Spidey's life is back to normal AGAIN. The new powers are gone but so are the nightmares and headaches. Doc Connors tells Spidey that much of Smythe's work with repairing cells has been leaked to the open source after the battle and he finds great potential in using it to continue his own research. They hug and Spidey webs off into the night, aerial moves galore. Then a quick scene of Doc Connors touching his shoulder with his missing arm and saying "Soon enough, I'll be whole again." -Credits-



Last edited by OoAnd1; 04-20-2007 at 04:43 AM.
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Old 08-02-2006, 02:40 AM   #2
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

THAT. WAS. AWESOME.
I have never seen a fan script manage to fit so many villains(and man-Spider!) and still make sense, but this does it perfectly. Great work.

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Old 08-02-2006, 03:44 AM   #3
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Thnx. I believe that all Spidey movies are and should be continued by great stories and themes. The 2 main themes here are 1) The evolution of Spidey's powers. That, what we know as Spidey was gentically never supposed to be the final product but an intermediate stage. And 2) A Death sentence. Vulture and Spidey both know they only have so much time and Raimi would be great at showing what choices both these characters would take knowing they are meant to die.

A couple more notes, I never wanted Spidey to be seen as a giant spider if he actually even transformed. It would be weird to see "Peter Parker" as a giant spider. But hints at it and the last scene would be enough for the story. And I threw in a Rhino cameo cuz so many people want it. Lastly, I think it does a decent job at grasping the essence of the other 3 main villians Shocker, Tombstone and Smythe. And now for SM:5, Lizard (finally) and maybe a little Spider Slayer has potential.

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Old 08-02-2006, 07:30 PM   #4
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Yeah, Rhino seriously needs to be in a movie, cameo or not. 1 fight scene alone would be worth it!

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Old 08-03-2006, 01:46 PM   #5
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Do you not think Rhino might come off overly similar to Juggernaut in X-3?

Unsure about the Man-Spider as it may alienate a larger audience as Peter is gradually losing his humanity, but I do like the idea of a terminally ill Toomes and something possibly fatal going on with Peter as a result of the spider bite of long ago.

I could personally only think of two (possibly) quality stories to continue on from 3. This really does open it up for a Vulture storyline, and that is one that I was struggling to justify. Very well done!

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Old 08-03-2006, 04:09 PM   #6
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Nah, if they did Rhino correctly the audiences would love it. But they better not make him less of a threat just because he's dumb, that would ruin it.

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Old 08-03-2006, 04:55 PM   #7
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

kl script, but shocker and vulture as main enemies..HELLLL NO

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Old 08-03-2006, 05:21 PM   #8
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

This story is great and I think The Shocker/ Vulture thing works as well. I'm glad we see a new beginning and not another boy saving girl story. The Man-Spider can really draw in some curious audiences and still make the die hard fans of the series happy. Plus Tombstone and a Rhino cameo is great. And it opens a huge door for The Lizard in five. OoAnd1, I salute you and your brilliant idea. I hope you can write a good #5.

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Old 08-04-2006, 10:29 PM   #9
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Amm-arD
kl script, but shocker and vulture as main enemies..HELLLL NO
I dunno, seems like a good team-up to me.
I like the way Tombstone was included too.

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Old 08-05-2006, 05:56 PM   #10
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Amm-arD
kl script, but shocker and vulture as main enemies..HELLLL NO
I understand what you're saying but I think there's plenty of eye candy with those two guys. "Spider-Man 1: The Movie" video game had both guys and was pretty cool and unique fighting them. Even though it's the story that drives all Spidey movies I know that everyone wants to see action too.

My S-M5 is almost done and with the characters involved, the action on film would be more intense. I'll post it soon...

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Old 08-07-2006, 04:35 PM   #11
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Here it is, S-M5...the sequel to this fan script. Link below.

http://www.superherohype.com/forums/...d.php?t=245944

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Old 08-10-2006, 09:05 AM   #12
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

That was an awesome fanscript! I love the whole storyline, and it's a side of spidey that not alot of ppl have seen.
THUMBS UP!!!!!!
~Sara~

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Old 08-29-2006, 08:22 AM   #13
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Nice job

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Old 09-02-2006, 11:58 PM   #14
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Spoiler Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Thnx everyone for all of the positive feedback. It was a lot more fun writing sequels 5 and 6 knowing it was being anticipated.

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Old 09-04-2006, 12:28 AM   #15
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

I'm working on my comics based on your plot lines, by the way. Halfway through Spidey #4, and starting on Spidey #5. They're looking pretty good, I'll try to upload them somewhere when they're all finished if I can, but it might take a while.

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Old 09-09-2006, 03:31 PM   #16
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Okay, here is a sneak preview of one of the fight scenes from my comic!



LOL, just kidding. Thought it was a funny pic though!

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Old 09-09-2006, 11:21 PM   #17
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

^^^ That's pretty funny. Good luck with your drawings.

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Old 09-10-2006, 07:04 AM   #18
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Quote:
Originally Posted by cosbydaf
Okay, here is a sneak preview of one of the fight scenes from my comic!



LOL, just kidding. Thought it was a funny pic though!
lol

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Old 09-10-2006, 11:07 AM   #19
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Im going to be honest. When I first saw the topic title, I thought this was going to be another crappy fan script. I've seen lots of them on here. But after reading it, I gotta that was actual pretty good. I really like how you were able to incorperate Shocker, Vulture and the other villains in the movie so well without it seeming overwhelming, even though they are not big villains. Good job

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Old 09-21-2006, 11:46 PM   #20
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

^^^ Thnx. Even if they don't decide on making another trilogy, I think they should at least go with a 4-movie saga. If that's the case, I think my fan script would be an interesting way of ending it. Maybe, dare it be done? Spidey loses his powers for good?!

Either way, I NEED to see Shocker in a Spidey film. He's a true bad@ss!

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Old 09-22-2006, 09:32 AM   #21
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

i really think you have some talent with script writing. it's good mix of different issues...

just one thing... the middle seamed to be missing action... it seemed like their was only like 1 big battle...

also, Vulture and Shocker, even though their cool, aren't really BIG enough to be a main villain.. when someone thinks of a main villain, usually it's: Green Goblin, Doctor Octopus, Sandman, Venom, Carnage, Electro... someone like that... but not... Shocker, Rhino, Tombstone, or Vulture...

though the script was good, i don't think it would sell as much as one with Doc Ock or Venom, etc...

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Old 09-22-2006, 03:00 PM   #22
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Quote:
Originally Posted by spideyman101
when someone thinks of a main villain, usually it's: Green Goblin, Doctor Octopus, Sandman, Venom, Carnage, Electro... someone like that... but not... Shocker, Rhino, Tombstone, or Vulture...
Uh those in bold, most people do not think of them as main villains (though Carnage might seem like one at times). When people found out Sandman was going to be the main villain of Spider-Man 3, people were shocked. Most of general public dont even know who Sandman is (well until the movie comes out that is).

As long as theres a good story, such as this guys script, they could easily have whoever as the main villain(s).

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Old 09-22-2006, 09:34 AM   #23
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

let me clarify... adding Shocker and Vulture is a good tocuh... i just think a bigger villain should have the main role along with them... maybe if Venom survived in SM3, then have him... if not, adding Carnage at the very end would be a great touch... i'm currently working on my own script right now...

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Old 09-22-2006, 03:18 PM   #24
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

well, maybe their not as popular as Doc Ock, Venom, or Goblin... but they sure are better than "Spot", "Grizzly-Man", "Kangaroo-Man" and the like. :P

maybe i should have said that in terms of the more FAMOUS ones...

or the Original ones... the original ones would be Chameleon, Vulture, Doc Ock, Sandman, Lizard, Mysterio, Green Goblin, Kraven, etc.

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Old 09-22-2006, 03:42 PM   #25
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Default Re: My S-M4 (Man-Spider & Vulture/Shocker Story)

Quote:
Originally Posted by spideyman101
maybe i should have said that in terms of the more FAMOUS ones...
Sandman is not famous or well known.

Quote:
or the Original ones... the original ones would be Chameleon, Vulture, Doc Ock, Sandman, Lizard, Mysterio, Green Goblin, Kraven, etc.
Shocker and Rhino are classic (originial) villains too, though you may already know that.

EDIT- Also after reading your post, I kinda lost what some of your point was.

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