The JJ Abrams Superman script

[ultimatefan]

Just read the second draft of the JJ Abrams script. There´s a lot that I like about it. I kinda dig the Star Wars-like scenario, even though it may bother the more purist fans. A lot fo the stuff with Clark manifesting his powers as a kid is charming and fun and funny, even though there´s a little too much of it.There´s great banter between Lois and Clark, love the final battle, the fight with the Rouser.

My main problem, however is in many ways this is as much a Donner remake as SR, if not more. It kinda reads like Superman ! meets Superman 2, it has a lot of the same bits from both movies, even though written with some tweaks and twists. While the script took off the main thing that annoyed fans, Luthor as a Kryptonian, it still implied there was a chance we´d see him with super powers in a sequel. I was actually more excited by the ending than by the script itself, the prospect of Superman going to Krypton to save his home planet, that was fresher than anything else about it.

I also thought, was it necessary to make Clark the laughingstock of the school to protect his secret. I know he pretends to be a mild-mannered, sometimes even bumbling reporter, but he´s a grown man, he knows what he´s doing, for a kid all the humiliation seems unnecessarily cruel.

This is a well-executed script for what it intends to be, but is this how I feel Superman should have been rebooted? No, not really. I know Superman Returns wasn´t the movie that resurrected Supes as a pop culture icon, but I don´t this would have been the one either. I keep insisting that we need something more different, and that there´s nothing wrong with starting with an established Superman, even if you do some digging into his past during the movie.

[BH/HHH]

Well we all know there wasnt the final draft so there's no telling what changes were made but I'd say with a rewrite this Superman film could have worked.

[ultimatefan]

Originally Posted by BH/HHH

Well we all know there wasnt the final draft so there's no telling what changes were made but I'd say with a rewrite this Superman film could have worked.

It needed very drastic changes IMO. It wouldn´t have been fixed with a polish, it needed major story point changes.

[BH/HHH]

Originally Posted by ultimatefan

It needed very drastic changes IMO. It wouldn´t have been fixed with a polish, it needed major story point changes.

Well yeah I was gonna say a few rewrites but the structure of the script was good.

[Alonsovich]

Wait... 2nd draft?

[Bad Superman]

One of my biggest problems with the script was that Krypton didn't explode, which is the main reason Superman was sent to Earth: To be saved from Krypton's explosion.

[SuperDaniel]

Yeah...2nd draft? How the hell did you read it?

[ultimatefan]

I´m not at liberty to divulge how I got it, but I remember right after the Moriarty review on AICN, based on the 1st draft that more or less killed the project, Harry did talk about the 2nd draft and how it improved things that weren´t working on the 1st. This draft doesn´t have Lex as a Kryptonian, even though it implies that he may have gotten super powers from a mental contact to Ty-Zor, who´s a cousin of Kal-El and the main villain of the script. It still has the stuff where Krypton is at war and doesn´t explode completely, the prophecy thing and the Superman death scene with a sort of new ageish solution that also rubbed Moriarty - and myself - the wrong way. It follows a lot of bits from the first two Supes movies, even takes about an hour to show him in action in costume, after a brief appearance in the beginning.

[SchumacherFan]

I havent read the script, but could you tell me if Krypton wasn't blown up, why was Superman sent to Earth ? ? ?

[ultimatefan]

Originally Posted by SchumacherFan

I havent read the script, but could you tell me if Krypton wasn't blown up, why was Superman sent to Earth ? ? ?

A piece of Krypton was blown up during the war, but it suggests that the planet may be close to its demise. Superman is sent to Earth in the beginning, thee are some cool moments of him as a kid discovering his powers and scaring Pa and Ma Kent, which actually were chosen by Jor-El in this version. We see him meet Lois for the first time, Daily Planet, etc.

[Alonsovich]

I'm more interested in knowing how did they solve the Kryptonian Lex stuff... the LR script review stated that basically Lex was a failed salesman that somehow gets in contact with some fallen Kryptonian ship which allows him to be from a nobody to the founder of Lexcorp in almost no time... is this the case? And in this case... is he somehow still connected in any form to Krypton? I don't actually mind the idea of chunks of Krypton surviving (Kandor has been done in the comics anyway)... but does this prophecy thing still survive there? This is highly interesting, btw... you're possibly the only person on superhero boards that actually has read this thing... the 1st draft is out there... there is someone that gave a detailed review on the Schwartz rewrite... but from this 2nd draft (which was the possible Ratner shooting script) the info is very lacking...

[SuperDaniel]

I`ve read the 2nd draft now and i have to say i REALLY like this script. It does feel like a Superman movie and a great one. It`s a great improvement over the 1st draft.

Some things i don`t like:

1- Civil War on Krypton - I really see no point in this, inventing new villains, making Jor-el the king of Krypton or something, when they can use Brainiac invading Krypton, Zod trying to protect it and Jor-el as just the scientist who save his son like it`s always been in the comics. Makes no sense to alter so much the myhtos. A little re-write there would make the story perfect.

2- Pa Kent dying and Jor-el visiting the Earth before makes no sense. I feels forced and i just don`t like the idea that Jor-el knew where his son would end up. I like luck aspect in the comics that so many things could`ve been different if the kents didn`t find Clark. I like the fate thing...

3-Jor-el sending Superman`s costume with the ship. Makes no sense for him to send an adult costume. Just make Clark and Ma Kent making it after saving Lois from the plane.

4-Superman ignoring the president. I know where JJ was going with this but this is something that he just wouldn`t do.

5-Luthor gaining knowledge and powers from Kryptonians. That just makes no sense at all. It`s ok for him to find the body, it`s ok for him make LexCorp out of this knowledge on alien tech but i`d like to see Lex finding one of Jor-el`s probe or even Braniacs. I hate that Ty-zor transfers him his powers, as it is intended. Hate this with passion.

6-Superman dying. Well, all this crap about prophecy, bla bla bla, Jor-el in transe. Hated it. This almost ruins the whole awesomeness of the script for me. It`s just dumb nonsense and a re-writing of the mythos that just DIDN`T NEED TO be done.

HOW TO FIX THE MISTAKES?

Just replace the Krypton War with Brainiac invading Krypton to steal Kandor and Krypton`s knowledge and technology. Krypton explodes, Jor-el and Lara dies. Brainiac is the main villain, invades Earth and all that. Everything else would fall into place. No crap about civil war, brothers, prophecy BS, Superman returning to Krypton,etc.



OTHERWISE, it`s an amazing script and IT IS SOOOOOOOO MUCH BETTER THAN SUPERMAN RETURNS. One more re-write and would make this PERFECT.

[Excel]

Man I been saying it for years ever since I read the damn thing.

It ****ing ROCKS. It would be awesome to see made.

[Alonsovich]

WTF? Now everybody read the goddamn draft?

[SuperDaniel]

Yeah, Excel, its really good. I just hate this download consciousness thing to Lex Luthor, Superman dying and the whole Civil War on Krypton. Just a little tweaks and it would be perfect. THe Smallville scenes are amazing and Lois is just so well-written...

[batman44]

I'm jealous. I've been searching ages for the second draft (or third for that matter) and I still haven't found it. But since you guys found it has to be out there somewhere....my search continues.

[Ultimate_Superman]

The third draft is the best one. It gives you the Superman movie everyone wanted to see some what. I mean it still read like a cross between Spider-Man and Iron Man but it gave you Lexcorp and Lex as a human as well as Krypton blowing up and other things. The third draft to me is much like Superman Returns TDC. Where in SR TDC that movie explained more and showed more emotion and gave a complete story. The same can be said for his third draft where it gave us the reboot most wanted. However I wanted a more serious type of story (cross between Superman Returns-The Dark Knight) then what he wrote.

[Alonsovich]

Originally Posted by Ultimate_Superman

The third draft is the best one. It gives you the Superman movie everyone wanted to see some what. I mean it still read like a cross between Spider-Man and Iron Man but it gave you Lexcorp and Lex as a human as well as Krypton blowing up and other things. The third draft to me is much like Superman Returns TDC. Where in SR TDC that movie explained more and showed more emotion and gave a complete story. The same can be said for his third draft where it gave us the reboot most wanted. However I wanted a more serious type of story (cross between Superman Returns-The Dark Knight) then what he wrote.

Isn't that the one where they changed Jor-El to be the villain and Ty-Zor was Supes' half brother?

[Ultimate_Superman]

Originally Posted by Alonsovich

Isn't that the one where they changed Jor-El to be the villain and Ty-Zor was Supes' half brother?

Nope thats the one where Krypton blows up and Superman and Lex are like post crisis Superman & Lex.

[Excel]

Who has the 3rd draft....PM FTW!

[Excel]

Howd you read it/ pm ftw

[batman44]

Edit:

[Juggernaut33]

Could someone be kind enough to MP me the 2nd and 3d drafts of the FlyBy screenplay, please? That would really be awesome!

[Juggernaut33]

Originally Posted by Juggernaut33

Could someone be kind enough to MP me the 2nd and 3d drafts of the FlyBy screenplay, please? That would really be awesome!

Nobody, really?

[Alonsovich]

Ok... finally read this one. My take on this:

Kata-Zor to Zod, Ty-Zor to Jax-Ur, all planet Krypton destroyed because of that kryptonian bomb thing except for Kandor, make the reason for the civil war a new one (possession of the Eradicator, created by Jor-El), add the FOS (make it the place to keep the Eradicator technology, sent with Kal-El to Earth), no dubitative Supes in the plane sequence, when Supes dies he's awakened through the Eradicator in the FOS which gives him Jor-El's prophecy speech as something pre-recorded...

Change that... and this is the BEST GODDAMN SUPERMAN SCRIPT EVER...