Mike Tyson Quotes: You Have To Read These

[Assassin32]

“[He] called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse.’ I’m not a recluse.”

"My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Praise be to Allah!"

"My main objective is to be professional but to kill him. Craig Wilson is the greatest."

"I want to rip out his heart and feed it to him. I want to kill people. I want to rip their stomachs out and eat their children."

"You're sweet. I'm going to make sure you kiss me good with those big lips. I'm gonna make you my girlfriend. Choke on it biatch!"

Tyson on Tyrell Biggs' complaining to him about low blows "Low blows? Low blows? Huh! Mother****er you're fittin' to die!"

"He was screaming like my wife."

"If I don't kill him, it doesn't count."

"When you see me smash somebody's skull, you enjoy it."

"I try to catch him right on the tip of the nose, because I try to push the bone into the brain."

"How dare these boxers challenge me with their primitive skills? It makes me angry. They're just as good as dead."

"My power is discombobulating devastating; I could feel his muscle tissues collapse under my force. It's ludicrous these mortals even attempt to enter my realm."

"Anyone with a grain of sense would know that if I punched my wife I would rip her head off. It's all lies. I have never laid a finger on her."

"Look at you scared now, you hoe. Scared like a little white pussy. Scared of the real man. I'll **** you 'til you love me, ******."

“I wish one of you guys had children so I could kick them in their ****in' head or stomp on their testicles, so you could feel my pain because that's the pain I have, wakin' up every day."

[To a female reporter] "It's no doubt I am going to win this fight and I feel confident about winning this fight. I normally don't do interviews with womens unless I fornicate with them. So you shouldn't talk anymore... Unless you want to, you know."

"If I take this camera and put it in your face for 20 years, I don't know what you might be. You might be a homosexual if I put that camera on you since you were 13 years old. I've been on that camera since I was 13 years old."

"All praise is to Allah, I'll fight any man, any animal, if Jesus were here I'd fight him too."

"Champions don't quit. The only way you quit is when you're face down on the floor. Not taking a beating like a man is unethical."

"I just have this thing inside me that wants to eat and conquer. Maybe it's egotistical, but I have it in me. I don't want to be a tycoon. I just want to conquer people and their souls."

"I'm not Mother Teresa. But I'm also not Charles Manson!"

"I love to hit people. I love to. Most celebrities are afraid someone's going to attack them. I want someone to attack me. No weapons. Just me and him. I like to beat men and beat them bad."

"I don't do anything. My life sucks."

"I'll never be happy. I believe I'll die alone. I would want it that way. I've been a loner all my life with my secrets and my pain. I'm really lost, but I'm trying to find myself. I'm really a sad, pathetic case."

"My whole life has been a waste -- I've been a failure."

"I need some discipline over myself; I need some emotional intelligence."
"They would give Jeffrey Dahmer a second chance before they gave me another one. If you saw a [police] lineup and saw Tyson and Dahmer and they asked, 'Who killed and ate those people?' you would pick me and not Jeffrey."

"I'm on this Zoloft thing, right? But I'm on that to keep me from killing y'all! ... "

"Having no hope is the worst thing that could happen to anybody. I've been through that. I've come too far to turn back now."

"I don't react to a tragic happening any more. I took so many bad things as a kid and some people think I don't care about anything. It's just too hard for me to get emotional. I can't cry no more."

"I'm crazy. Crazy like a fox mother****er!"

“My biggest weakness is my sensitivity. I am too sensitive a person”


For more: http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Mike_Tyson

[Carter]

"My power is discombobulating devastating; I could feel his muscle tissues collapse under my force. It's ludicrous these mortals even attempt to enter my realm."

LMFAO

[The Lumberjack]

"Look at you scared now, you hoe. Scared like a little white pussy. Scared of the real man. I'll **** you 'til you love me, ******."

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[BK]

“[He] called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse.’ I’m not a recluse.”

I didn't even have to read past this first line. Classic post.

[oakzap425]

Originally Posted by Assassin32

“[He] called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse.’ I’m not a recluse.”

"My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Praise be to Allah!"

"My main objective is to be professional but to kill him. Craig Wilson is the greatest."

"I want to rip out his heart and feed it to him. I want to kill people. I want to rip their stomachs out and eat their children."

"You're sweet. I'm going to make sure you kiss me good with those big lips. I'm gonna make you my girlfriend. Choke on it biatch!"

Tyson on Tyrell Biggs' complaining to him about low blows "Low blows? Low blows? Huh! Mother****er you're fittin' to die!"

"He was screaming like my wife."

"If I don't kill him, it doesn't count."

"When you see me smash somebody's skull, you enjoy it."

"I try to catch him right on the tip of the nose, because I try to push the bone into the brain."

"How dare these boxers challenge me with their primitive skills? It makes me angry. They're just as good as dead."

"My power is discombobulating devastating; I could feel his muscle tissues collapse under my force. It's ludicrous these mortals even attempt to enter my realm."

"Anyone with a grain of sense would know that if I punched my wife I would rip her head off. It's all lies. I have never laid a finger on her."

"Look at you scared now, you hoe. Scared like a little white pussy. Scared of the real man. I'll **** you 'til you love me, ******."

“I wish one of you guys had children so I could kick them in their ****in' head or stomp on their testicles, so you could feel my pain because that's the pain I have, wakin' up every day."

[To a female reporter] "It's no doubt I am going to win this fight and I feel confident about winning this fight. I normally don't do interviews with womens unless I fornicate with them. So you shouldn't talk anymore... Unless you want to, you know."

"If I take this camera and put it in your face for 20 years, I don't know what you might be. You might be a homosexual if I put that camera on you since you were 13 years old. I've been on that camera since I was 13 years old."

"All praise is to Allah, I'll fight any man, any animal, if Jesus were here I'd fight him too."

"Champions don't quit. The only way you quit is when you're face down on the floor. Not taking a beating like a man is unethical."

"I just have this thing inside me that wants to eat and conquer. Maybe it's egotistical, but I have it in me. I don't want to be a tycoon. I just want to conquer people and their souls."

"I'm not Mother Teresa. But I'm also not Charles Manson!"

"I love to hit people. I love to. Most celebrities are afraid someone's going to attack them. I want someone to attack me. No weapons. Just me and him. I like to beat men and beat them bad."

"I don't do anything. My life sucks."

"I'll never be happy. I believe I'll die alone. I would want it that way. I've been a loner all my life with my secrets and my pain. I'm really lost, but I'm trying to find myself. I'm really a sad, pathetic case."

"My whole life has been a waste -- I've been a failure."

"I need some discipline over myself; I need some emotional intelligence."
"They would give Jeffrey Dahmer a second chance before they gave me another one. If you saw a [police] lineup and saw Tyson and Dahmer and they asked, 'Who killed and ate those people?' you would pick me and not Jeffrey."

"I'm on this Zoloft thing, right? But I'm on that to keep me from killing y'all! ... "

"Having no hope is the worst thing that could happen to anybody. I've been through that. I've come too far to turn back now."

"I don't react to a tragic happening any more. I took so many bad things as a kid and some people think I don't care about anything. It's just too hard for me to get emotional. I can't cry no more."

"I'm crazy. Crazy like a fox mother****er!"

“My biggest weakness is my sensitivity. I am too sensitive a person”


For more: http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Mike_Tyson

...The single greatest thing ever.


Am I allowed to put this in my sig?!?

[Webmistress]

Ear tastes like chicken.

[oakzap425]

Originally Posted by The Lumberjack

"Look at you scared now, you hoe. Scared like a little white pussy. Scared of the real man. I'll **** you 'til you love me, ******."

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

...I agree...

[Assassin32]

Originally Posted by oakzap425

...The single greatest thing ever.


Am I allowed to put this in my sig?!?

Hell yeah. I did.

[Webmistress]

Not all of them.....

[unknownuser]

Originally Posted by Assassin32

“[He] called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse.’ I’m not a recluse.”

"My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Praise be to Allah!"

"My main objective is to be professional but to kill him. Craig Wilson is the greatest."

"I want to rip out his heart and feed it to him. I want to kill people. I want to rip their stomachs out and eat their children."

"You're sweet. I'm going to make sure you kiss me good with those big lips. I'm gonna make you my girlfriend. Choke on it biatch!"

Tyson on Tyrell Biggs' complaining to him about low blows "Low blows? Low blows? Huh! Mother****er you're fittin' to die!"

"He was screaming like my wife."

"If I don't kill him, it doesn't count."

"When you see me smash somebody's skull, you enjoy it."

"I try to catch him right on the tip of the nose, because I try to push the bone into the brain."

"How dare these boxers challenge me with their primitive skills? It makes me angry. They're just as good as dead."

"My power is discombobulating devastating; I could feel his muscle tissues collapse under my force. It's ludicrous these mortals even attempt to enter my realm."

"Anyone with a grain of sense would know that if I punched my wife I would rip her head off. It's all lies. I have never laid a finger on her."

"Look at you scared now, you hoe. Scared like a little white pussy. Scared of the real man. I'll **** you 'til you love me, ******."

“I wish one of you guys had children so I could kick them in their ****in' head or stomp on their testicles, so you could feel my pain because that's the pain I have, wakin' up every day."

[To a female reporter] "It's no doubt I am going to win this fight and I feel confident about winning this fight. I normally don't do interviews with womens unless I fornicate with them. So you shouldn't talk anymore... Unless you want to, you know."

"If I take this camera and put it in your face for 20 years, I don't know what you might be. You might be a homosexual if I put that camera on you since you were 13 years old. I've been on that camera since I was 13 years old."

"All praise is to Allah, I'll fight any man, any animal, if Jesus were here I'd fight him too."

"Champions don't quit. The only way you quit is when you're face down on the floor. Not taking a beating like a man is unethical."

"I just have this thing inside me that wants to eat and conquer. Maybe it's egotistical, but I have it in me. I don't want to be a tycoon. I just want to conquer people and their souls."

"I'm not Mother Teresa. But I'm also not Charles Manson!"

"I love to hit people. I love to. Most celebrities are afraid someone's going to attack them. I want someone to attack me. No weapons. Just me and him. I like to beat men and beat them bad."

"I don't do anything. My life sucks."

"I'll never be happy. I believe I'll die alone. I would want it that way. I've been a loner all my life with my secrets and my pain. I'm really lost, but I'm trying to find myself. I'm really a sad, pathetic case."

"My whole life has been a waste -- I've been a failure."

"I need some discipline over myself; I need some emotional intelligence."
"They would give Jeffrey Dahmer a second chance before they gave me another one. If you saw a [police] lineup and saw Tyson and Dahmer and they asked, 'Who killed and ate those people?' you would pick me and not Jeffrey."

"I'm on this Zoloft thing, right? But I'm on that to keep me from killing y'all! ... "

"Having no hope is the worst thing that could happen to anybody. I've been through that. I've come too far to turn back now."

"I don't react to a tragic happening any more. I took so many bad things as a kid and some people think I don't care about anything. It's just too hard for me to get emotional. I can't cry no more."

"I'm crazy. Crazy like a fox mother****er!"

“My biggest weakness is my sensitivity. I am too sensitive a person”


For more: http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Mike_Tyson

nice find!

[JStorm]

Our lunch ladies in school would deny us food if we mocked Tyson. I didn't eat for a month cause I said Tyson would lose to Ali.

[The Hellrider]

Originally Posted by Assassin32

[To a female reporter] "It's no doubt I am going to win this fight and I feel confident about winning this fight. I normally don't do interviews with womens unless I fornicate with them. So you shouldn't talk anymore... Unless you want to, you know."

"All praise is to Allah, I'll fight any man, any animal, if Jesus were here I'd fight him too."

"Champions don't quit. The only way you quit is when you're face down on the floor. Not taking a beating like a man is unethical."

I liked those three.

Tyson's a weird dude, right up there with Michael Jackson and Anna Nicole Smith.

[Addendum]

One morning I woke up and found my favorite pigeon, Julius, had died. I was devastated and was gonna use his crate as my stickball bat to honor him. I left the crate on my stoop and went in to get something and I returned to see the sanitation man put the crate into the crusher. I rushed him and caught him flush on the temple with a titanic right hand he was out cold, convulsing on the floor like an infantile retard

F'ing hysterical

[Assassin32]

Originally Posted by Webmistress

Not all of them.....

The one he highlighted.

[The Hellrider]

Originally Posted by JStorm

Our lunch ladies in school would deny us food if we mocked Tyson. I didn't eat for a month cause I said Tyson would lose to Ali.

You had some crazy lunch ladies. Ali would've owned Tyson.

[psychocheeseman]

thoase are gold!but i wouldn't laugh at them if i were near him when he saoid them.


hey why does mike tyson cry after sex?












....The Mace.

[The Lumberjack]

INAFANTILE RETARD?! Oh my god.......holy s**t......I don't think I've ever ead anything as funny as that........hehehehehehe.

[BK]

You'd wait 'till after the sex to bust out the mace?

[Assassin32]

"Look at you scared now, you hoe. Scared like a little white pussy. Scared of the real man. I'll **** you 'til you love me, ******."

^^I actually saw him say this to the reporter on ESPN Classic. It was amazing. By the way he was talking, it sounded like he was on the verge of tears.

[Matthew_Murdock]

i thought the funniest one was "My main objective is to be professional but to kill him. Craig Wilson is the greatest." but they were all great, lol.

[Webmistress]

I know that, silly...

[oakzap425]

Originally Posted by Assassin32

The one he highlighted.

*glares* I'm a girl.

[Assassin32]

"There are nine million people who see me in the ring and hate my guts. Most of them are white. That's okay. Just spell my name right."

"Prison was worth it, because I got pussy, SHE got money for selling the story, and I was hungrier than before to kill a mother****er"!

"I paid a worker at New York's zoo to re-open it just for me and Robin. When we got to the gorilla cage there was one big silverback gorilla there just bullying all the other gorillas. They were so powerful but their eyes were like an innocent infant. I offered the attendant $10,000 to open the cage and let me smash that silverback's snotbox! He declined."

[The Lumberjack]

Originally Posted by oakzap425

...I agree...

You little minx, you.

[Webmistress]