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05-02-2009, 02:30 AM
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#1 |
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Side-Kick
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 12,482
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The Venom Within
edit.
Last edited by Arcturus; 04-09-2011 at 07:51 PM. |
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05-02-2009, 10:45 AM
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#2 |
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More Than Amazing
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Canada, Dammit!
Posts: 4,441
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Re: The Venom Within
Kick ass, Arcturus. Nice to see you back with the writing
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05-02-2009, 11:52 AM
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#3 |
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Anti-Hero
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Burlington, NC
Posts: 1,204
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Re: The Venom Within
Very nice, friend. I’m really looking forward to the first entry.
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05-03-2009, 03:51 PM
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#4 |
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Side-Kick
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 12,482
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Re: The Venom Within
edit.
Last edited by Arcturus; 04-09-2011 at 07:54 PM. |
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05-03-2009, 04:17 PM
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#5 |
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More Than Amazing
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Canada, Dammit!
Posts: 4,441
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Re: The Venom Within
I'm liking this, so far, 'Arcturus'. Adrian reminds me of Michael Douglas' character from the movie 'Falling Down'. My only real problem with this part is that you pulled out the cliche "Thug Wannabe" trick, where the thugs provoke the character into his coming (extreme) action. Anyhow, all I'm hoping for (from this) is that you build up some real pathos behind Adrian's crazed nature (instead of just making him a loose cannon for villainous intentions).
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05-03-2009, 05:08 PM
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#6 |
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Side-Kick
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 12,482
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Re: The Venom Within
Cool, thankyou for the response! I'm glad you like it.
However, I think I could have done much better. I don't know what's going on, I can't seem to stay on focus as of late when it comes to writing. |
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05-03-2009, 05:40 PM
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#7 | |
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More Than Amazing
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Canada, Dammit!
Posts: 4,441
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Re: The Venom Within
Quote:
Anyhow, whatever you do... I'll (pretty much) always be there to check it out. Good luck, my friend 
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