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Old 07-03-2011, 08:50 PM   #151
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

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This movie never lied to you. Bay didnt lie to you. He said there would be more story. And there was. There was a story, a better on the ROTF. He said the humor would be toned down...and it was. Only one scene stood out as godawful...the bathroom one. There was also some pretty good acting from Shia. I mean, c'mon...the dude did the scene justice.

So there you go. Another rant by me over this stupid ass movie. It's ment to entertain you. You dont like movies that exist to purely entertain you? Fine. It's cool. But watch something else.
On the contrary Bay blamed that disaster of a film ROTF on the writers' strike. This time he didn't have that excuse. We got literally the same movie with no sense of coherency except he jam packed it with even more characters/people.

This pervasive excuse that it's a "summer blockbuster" is cheap. I've seen many fun summer blockbusters that weren't this poorly put together.

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Old 07-03-2011, 08:55 PM   #152
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

It felt like an extended episode of Generation 1. It really did. It borrowed the plots of "The Ultimate Doom" and "Megatron's Master Plan" and followed them fairly well. It think if you were a fan of the show you'd see this. Even the weak characterization and hokey villain scheme of world domination seemed like it was ripped right out the 1980s cartoon. I loved that. Dylan reminded me an awful lot of Dr. Arcaville and the humor was toned down. Even the humor seemed slightly like an edgier version of the 'toons humor, except for that deep wang scene. Although I thought Bay brutality did a nice job of counterbalancing the humor.

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Old 07-03-2011, 10:09 PM   #153
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

Why the hell did Sam suddenly know parkour at the end? You'd think he'd have used that **** before. So stupid.

The movie felt exactly like 'Revenge of the Fallen'. I'm a big fan of the first one, but these last two are so unforgettable. I wish someone would give Bay a decent script, he'd show all the haters.

That shot of BB on the highway transforming and catching Sam was kickass, though. Epic.

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Old 07-03-2011, 10:14 PM   #154
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

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Why the hell did Sam suddenly know parkour at the end? You'd think he'd have used that **** before. So stupid.

The movie felt exactly like 'Revenge of the Fallen'. I'm a big fan of the first one, but these last two are so unforgettable. I wish someone would give Bay a decent script, he'd show all the haters.

That shot of BB on the highway transforming and catching Sam was kickass, though. Epic.
Bay has shown he can deliver a good and coherent story from some of his past movies. But it appears he needs someone rein him in (maybe Bruckheimer) when he tries to be funny.

After the 1st movie made so much money the studio probably said do whatever you want as long as you rake in that dough. So even if the 2nd and 3rd movie had good scripts I believe Bay will somehow still mess it up with no one controlling his impulses.

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Old 07-03-2011, 10:31 PM   #155
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

this may sound off topic but can someone help me clarify the part where optimus was accidentally tangled from the construction metal ropes during the scene where his flight tech was shot.

there was a scene there where 2 autobots (not sure about their names) came below and shouted to help him get untanggled.

as far as im concerned, optimus is equipped with one of the most advanced weaponry, and i regularly see his burning katar when he fights, was wondering why doesnt he just uses that to cut the ropes around him.

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Old 07-03-2011, 10:35 PM   #156
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

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this may sound off topic but can someone help me clarify the part where optimus was accidentally tangled from the construction metal ropes during the scene where his flight tech was shot.

there was a scene there where 2 autobots (not sure about their names) came below and shouted to help him get untanggled.

as far as im concerned, optimus is equipped with one of the most advanced weaponry, and i regularly see his burning katar when he fights, was wondering why doesnt he just uses that to cut the ropes around him.
You are pointing out a plot contrivance of that end battle scene. Bay did that so Optimus could come in at the last second and save everyone. I don't even think those ropes are strong enough to support Optimus' weight for very long either. Yes he should've just been able to cut through them but Bay didn't want him to.

One of many reasons that last act battle was kind of tedious with poor narrative.

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Old 07-03-2011, 10:42 PM   #157
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

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Can I just call you a snob?

Do you sit there and analyze theme park rides? Do you try and understand the meaning behind Buzz Lightyear: Laser whatever?

Do you attack the character development and motives of John Connor and the T-800 in Terminator 2 3D: Battle Across Time?

Because that's all these movies are. Attractions. Things to take your mind away from everything else in the world.

And they're even more so with 3D.

So stop your *****ing, and get the **** over it. Dont even give me **** after this post, because you are wrong. Plain wrong.

The fact is this. These movies are shallow, explosion fests with quick rushed stories, simple character development, and amazing special effects.

Dispite your constant *****ing about the american public, there is not that many of these types of flicks that came out this year. Most of the Summer flicks HAVE been well made, character driven, movies, with actual plot, and some...very little, but some depth. But at the same time, sometimes I just dont ****ing want that.

These movies exist to thrill you. Nothing more. If you cant have fun during them, then what-the-****-ever. Watch something else.

It's one thing if you were lead to believe these would be films of the highest caliber, and if you were, insert insult here....

This movie never lied to you. Bay didnt lie to you. He said there would be more story. And there was. There was a story, a better on the ROTF. He said the humor would be toned down...and it was. Only one scene stood out as godawful...the bathroom one. There was also some pretty good acting from Shia. I mean, c'mon...the dude did the scene justice.

So there you go. Another rant by me over this stupid ass movie. It's ment to entertain you. You dont like movies that exist to purely entertain you? Fine. It's cool. But watch something else.



This is the worst possible excuse in defending this trash. A movie doesn't have to be pretentious "high art" (let's say..."The Fountain") nor does it have to be bottom of the barrel, brainless robots smashing stuff and explosions (Transformers, natch). As with everything, moderation is key. Inception did the summer blockbuster the RIGHT way. It had a good story, a brain and most importantly, a HEART.

Transformers is an endlessly shallow, pathetically painful excuse for escapism. If you need to watch robots smash stuff up and great SFX, more power to you, but some of us want a little more from our movies.

I guess Pixar has had the wrong idea all along then, huh?

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Old 07-03-2011, 10:44 PM   #158
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

Why can't you have both?

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Old 07-03-2011, 10:54 PM   #159
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

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Why can't you have both?


That's exactly what I said.

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Old 07-03-2011, 10:57 PM   #160
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

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You are pointing out a plot contrivance of that end battle scene. Bay did that so Optimus could come in at the last second and save everyone. I don't even think those ropes are strong enough to support Optimus' weight for very long either. Yes he should've just been able to cut through them but Bay didn't want him to.

One of many reasons that last act battle was kind of tedious with poor narrative.
It seems kinda illogical to me altho i got no problems with it, im just merely asking for other's reaction about that scene. and were talking about "optimus prime" here. theyve shoulda thought of something that would really cause optimus to delay saving chicago not by just letting him accidentally stumble on a metal rope wire.

the moment he got tangled, it quickly came to my mind that its the best opportunity for decepticons to attack optimus since he was very helpless, but it didnt happen. considering decepticons army were everywhere.

nevertheless, it was a good movie. enjoyed it.

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Old 07-03-2011, 11:55 PM   #161
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

First things first..
I used to watch Transformers cartoons as a kid, but if you asked me to name all the Transformers I couldn't do it, I liked the cartoon but was never a "mega-fan".
I loved the first Transformers movie, when it was first released and Michael Bay came under a lot of fire from "REAL" Transformers fans, I couldn't quite understand why. Afterall the movie IMO was great with SFX that at the time hadn't been equaled anywhere.
Then came Transformers:ROTF.. Now, I liked ROTF, ok it wasn't as good as the first movie, but I enjoyed it.. Loved it actually.
And now TransformersSOTM.. A movie i'd been excited about ever since I saw the first teaser trailer, the movie Michael Bay said HAD to be seen in 3D, the movie that would make up for any short comings (if any) of ROTF.

Watched DOTM last night, granted the SFX were spectacular...
However, It was a movie I just didn't enjoy.

Pointless (aimed at the teenage boys in the audience) shots of Rosie Huntington-Whiteley.

Dialogue so cheesey it made me cringe.. Optimus Prime "Give up on us but never give up on yourselves" bollocks.

One scene in Chicago where it was daytime with Sentinal Prime going on about showing Earth who it's true masters were, then suddenly it's night time.. Badly edited or did I just fall asleep?

Optimus prime hung up on cables doing bugger all, totsl sitting duck and no decepticon attacks him... Only to turn up the cheese and save us all near the end of the battle.

No comedy for most of the movie (sadly missed IMO) only to have huge comedy scenes shoe horned in (Deep wang anyone) to make up for the lack of comedy.

3D.
The movie Michael Bay said HAD to be seen in 3D.. A movie I expected to leave me in 3D overload, I expected things flying out of the screen left right and center..
Did I get it it? No.
Should I have saved a few quid and watched it in 2D instead? probably.

Transformers: DSOTM... The best of the Tarnsformers trilogy? No.
A fitting end to the (Michael Bay directed) series? No.

Not by any means the worst film i've seen.. But honestly, it left me feeling a little disapointed.

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Old 07-04-2011, 12:20 AM   #162
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

Wow I just came back from seeing this and my god what a flamming turd. I can't believe green lantern got worse reviews than this all the stupid humor was still in it and the only good parts where with optimus prime I'd give it a 3/10

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Old 07-04-2011, 12:23 AM   #163
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

^@Adenjo
Very surprised at some of your comments. Especially the fact that you missed the comedic moments of the second movie, which I found horrendous to the point of making me hate the movie. It's still there in DOTM but just toned down while still being unfunny.
Secondly, IMO the best 3D is not one where objects fly out and try to get you to jump back. That's annoying and pointless. The best 3D is where it immerses you in the environment and adds depth to what your seeing. Great set pieces (wingsuit jumps etc.) with the 3D in this movie, the best since Avatar.

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Old 07-04-2011, 01:29 AM   #164
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

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Wow I just came back from seeing this and my god what a flamming turd. I can't believe green lantern got worse reviews than this all the stupid humor was still in it and the only good parts where with optimus prime I'd give it a 3/10
Did you watch the same movie as me? Anyway compared to GL this movie is oscar worthy for best picture of the year.

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Old 07-04-2011, 10:11 AM   #165
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Did you watch the same movie as me? Anyway compared to GL this movie is oscar worthy for best picture of the year.
Dude come on it's an hour and 1/2 of crap for 40 min of little cool stuff gl is leagues above this.

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Old 07-04-2011, 10:42 AM   #166
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

DOTM isn't great but GL is worst. Way worst

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Old 07-04-2011, 01:03 PM   #167
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

It's kind of pointless comparing one bad movie to another, but compared to other summer blockbusters like Fast Five, Thor, XFC, Pirates, this movie is no where close to any of those in terms of quality and even action.

This movie is stupid, Bay thinks his audience is equally stupid, so he wrote a stupid movie, with stupid characters, and a stupid plot

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Old 07-04-2011, 01:34 PM   #168
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One thing that I hate about about the movie is that...you never see Shockwave go into his pet/driller nor do you see him inside of it working it. Without any of that being on display in the movie it makes the driller totally come off as a mindless mechanical creature.

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Old 07-04-2011, 01:59 PM   #169
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

I also didn't care for how he rarely spoke. I get that may have been to showcase how cold he was, even compared to other Decepticons, but it didn't fly.

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Old 07-04-2011, 02:01 PM   #170
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What the **** did I just watch?

...

Alright, I'll admit that this Movie was more watchable than ROTF, but that's not really saying much. The raunchy humor got dialed way down, but the humor that is there is still stupid. This Movie is like a view inside Michael Bay's brain. In his world there seem to almost only exist hot women, military badasses and goofballs.

The tone of this Movie is so freaking inconsistent, I get taken out of the moment every freaking time I try to immerse myself into the world. You have a grand sci-fi adventure, with moments that have you on the edge of your seat and the next second it's like you're watching a bad sitcom. Honestly, red and yellow cups? The green purse? Or what's with slightly gay/psychotic/expert hacker/super butler? What's with these stupid characters and their quirks? Do not want.

Rosie, I will also admit, didn't do bad on her first acting gig. But good lord... you thought Megan Fox was nothing but eye candy? Bay takes it with her on a whole new level. I could almost hear Bay fapping in the background. All these dress changes, it was like she was on stage of some fashion show. And I hate how the girlfriend character completely regressed in this Movie. She's nothing but the object of desire - oh look at me, I'm blond, smile a lot and have firm tits - and the damsel in distress. At least Megan's character was a hands-on girl, with attitude and who got some **** done. Bay should have done the smart thing and simply re-cast Mikaela. At least then the conversation she had with Megatron wouldn't seem to come out of the blue. Not to mention that this new relationship felt completely superficial. At least with Mikaela there was history, and they bonded like crazy because of this whole Transformer war.

Now on to the Transformers. When Megatron is the one suggesting a truce, and Prime is all like "F**k that!", then there's something wrong with the picture here. Overall the Autobots seem excessively more violent than the Decepticons. What the heck is up with that? Yeah, the Decepticons are the evil ones, but every time they kill you they are nice enough to just shoot you a couple times. Autobots? They tear your head or face off, rip you limb from limb till you are just a torso, tear out your ****ing spine. I'm talking obviously about ROTF as well. What did they do with Prime in these damn Movies? He's been turned into judge, jury and executioner. Even the Decepticons were planning on taking prisoners before a human got pissy about it. Prime, he guns down defenseless and beaten Decepticons.

Now since this is dragging on way longer than I intended, I try to keep it short with other things I didn't like.

- Starscream going down like a pussy.
- Megatron went down without a fight.
- Shockwave was just there and got ****ed up bad by humans and their parachutes.
- Prime and wires. 'nuff said.
- Prime lets Chicago and probably hundreds of humans get wasted to make a point. (You've got to be ****ing kidding me.)
- Deep Wang.

Right now I only own the first Movie. And it's going to stay that way.

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Old 07-04-2011, 02:04 PM   #171
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

Amen Nathan ... A-freakin-men ....

Watching Rosie confront Megatron was one of the most embarrassing moments in film history.

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Old 07-04-2011, 02:05 PM   #172
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

complete and utter donkey ****

what little pros they had

optimus tearing **** up
she was hot to look at, but come on a little subtly would be nice( ass full screen)
laser beak was cool

cons

crap story
extreme character assassination
poor ending
annoying human characters
moronic plot elements
frat house unfunny jokes
we get it megan fox is gone no need to beat the horse anymore
and the biggest cock tease of a franchise big fight i have ever seen, seriously megatron lasted what 20 seconds

seriously i could go on but this movie was flat out crap. and whats scary is reports are coming in a of standing ovations in cinemas.

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Old 07-04-2011, 02:08 PM   #173
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This film was an insult to the viewer just like the one before it.
It just makes me sick how an action garbage like this makes such profit in the States, while intelligent films like "First Class" are being ignored and overlooked.
This Bay person must be persecuted for destroying the film as an art and for all his hate and discriminations he advertises in his work.

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Old 07-04-2011, 02:09 PM   #174
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

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One thing that I hate about about the movie is that...you never see Shockwave go into his pet/driller nor do you see him inside of it working it. Without any of that being on display in the movie it makes the driller totally come off as a mindless mechanical creature.
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I also didn't care for how he rarely spoke. I get that may have been to showcase how cold he was, even compared to other Decepticons, but it didn't fly.
Yeah, I was also disappointed with Shockwave's one line and two brief appearances. There was no reason why he couldn't have met up with Megatron, Starscream and Soundwave in Africa in the beginning. That way we could have finally had the big four Decepticons on screen at the same time. He could have also been present during the highway chase with the Dreads, maybe without the Driller in that case. I just expected more screentime from him considering he was a big part of the marketing campaign being advertised as the big bad of the movie. I realize that they needed to keep Sentinel's treachery as a surprise, but they could have found more room for Shockwave.

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Old 07-04-2011, 02:13 PM   #175
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Default Re: OFFICIAL Dark of the Moon REVIEW THREAD - Part 1

Spot on, Nathan!

I too, had heard of some theaters giving a standing ovation at the end.

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