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Old 01-24-2013, 10:52 AM   #876
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/batman

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Batman.
BY Mike Richardson-Bryan

- - - -
The five stages of grief if you’re Batman:
1. Fight crime
2. Fight crime
3. Fight crime
4. Fight crime
5. Fight crime
http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/t...e-wonder-twins

Quote:
The Personal Journal Of Zan, The Male Half Of The Wonder Twins.
BY Sean Hewlett

- - - -

January 21
Thinking of talking Jayna into quitting the Super Friends with me. It’s not that I don’t believe in what we do. It’s just embarrassing. I mean, how do I fit in with these guys? What’s that, Superman? You reversed time today by forcing the Earth to reverse its rotation? And, Batman, what’d you say? No superpowers and you still beat up a gang of 37 thugs and saved the president from being assassinated? Yeah, I had a good day, too. I turned into a bucket full of water and my monkey sidekick dumped me on the bad guy. It didn’t really stop him, but I bet his sweater shrunk a little … Yeah, go team.

January 22

Batman is an *******. As he’s assigning tasks to each Super Friend during an attack by the Legion of Doom, he tells me and my sister to mop the meeting room while everyone else fights the fight. Pretty certain he thinks of us as the Wonder Janitors.

January 23
Discovered great new use for superpower that makes me rethink leaving. Took the form of Wonder Woman’s shower water. Way better than initial toilet-water plan.


January 24
New low today. As Black Lightning and Green Lantern were harassing Aquaman for lame superpower of talking to fish, he responded by saying, “At least I can do more than take the ‘form of’ an ice ladder!” and stormed out of the room. And he did that air-quote thing when he said “form of.” Somehow, that made it much worse.
Quote:
January 25
Jayna not down with plan to leave. She says it’s because of the Super Friends insurance package. Admittedly, hard to beat the dental here, but I think her not wanting to leave has more to do with her crush on Robin. Gaydar obviously not one of her hidden superpowers. Also, can’t get her to agree to new, more aggressive battle plans. She seemed to consider my puddle-of-water/electric-eel combo, but won’t even entertain ideas about her choosing more lethal animals with poison or claws or big teeth. I mean, wouldn’t a pond/great-white-shark combo be more efficient than our stupid ice-wall/kangaroo combo?

January 26
We’re less visible than Wonder Woman’s jet around here. No one ever tries to get to know us. No one ever asks, “Hey, how’d you get your powers?” or “How is your power activated by contact with your sister?” or “How does your costume become a form of water, too?” or “Why the **** are your ears pointy like that?” Hell, no one even asks, “Hey, what’s your name?” We’re just “the twins.” People know the freakin’ monkey’s name, though.

January 27
Pulled off greatest prank ever today. At the mayor’s ceremony awarding the Super Friends the key to the city, took the form of a big ****ing wet spot on the crotch of the Flash’s tights as he addressed the crowd. Guess he found out there are more embarrassing things than getting made fun of for wearing purple tights in front of a bunch of grade-school kids, huh?

January 28
I want to die. I don’t have the words to describe the horror that was today. Apache Chief took a big swig of me when I was in water form and I had to wait it out. Yeah, as in pass through his digestive system. So, now, not only did I have to get pissed out of a giant Indian—and I’m positive there isn’t enough therapy in the world to get me to forget the things I saw—but I’m pretty sure I smell like urine. That means there’s probably a little of him left in me … I want to die. So much worse than the time I lost two fingers because that little ******* Gleek spilled some of me out of the bucket.

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I was at some diplomatic party once. Got to talking to this princess who told me that when it came to Superman, I was missing the point. She told me, "His real strength lay in his generous spirit and sense of what's fair." - King Faraday

"
Hes much more of a working class superhero, which is why we ended the whole book with the image of a laboring Superman. Hes Everyman operating on a scifi Paul Bunyan scale." - Grant Morrison

"Self Portrait" By Batman
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Old 01-24-2013, 02:04 PM   #877
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Old 01-24-2013, 04:43 PM   #878
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

It's not going to end too well for Clark or Karen up there.....is it??

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Old 01-24-2013, 05:19 PM   #879
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6


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I was at some diplomatic party once. Got to talking to this princess who told me that when it came to Superman, I was missing the point. She told me, "His real strength lay in his generous spirit and sense of what's fair." - King Faraday

"
Hes much more of a working class superhero, which is why we ended the whole book with the image of a laboring Superman. Hes Everyman operating on a scifi Paul Bunyan scale." - Grant Morrison

"Self Portrait" By Batman

Last edited by Lencho01; 01-27-2013 at 07:13 PM. Reason: Had to change the pic.
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Old 01-24-2013, 06:17 PM   #880
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A hero can be anyone. Even a man doing something as simple and reassuring as putting a coat around a young boy's shoulders to let him know that the world hadn't ended.

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Old 01-24-2013, 06:19 PM   #881
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

haha, awesome.

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Im done. Im leaving this website. I promise i will not be spiderman or attempt to be. I have a ral careerr to fulfill. Please don NOT tell anyone about this. I would appreciate if you all kept this a secret.
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Old 01-24-2013, 06:53 PM   #882
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

VIDEO-CLick to Watch!:


VIDEO-CLick to Watch!:


VIDEO-CLick to Watch!:


VIDEO-CLick to Watch!:


VIDEO-CLick to Watch!:

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I was at some diplomatic party once. Got to talking to this princess who told me that when it came to Superman, I was missing the point. She told me, "His real strength lay in his generous spirit and sense of what's fair." - King Faraday

"
Hes much more of a working class superhero, which is why we ended the whole book with the image of a laboring Superman. Hes Everyman operating on a scifi Paul Bunyan scale." - Grant Morrison

"Self Portrait" By Batman
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Old 01-24-2013, 07:06 PM   #883
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

Whats up with flash and ice cream?

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Old 01-24-2013, 07:16 PM   #884
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

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Originally Posted by Enriquespy View Post
Whats up with flash and ice cream?
He and Green Lantern had a feud over if Cake was better than Ice-Cream.

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Old 01-24-2013, 09:44 PM   #885
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

One day they must learn that cake and ice cream are both good in their own way, similar to apples and oranges or Coke and Pepsi.

EDIT 1/26/2013 -



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Last edited by Panthro; 01-26-2013 at 09:32 PM.
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Old 01-25-2013, 07:12 AM   #886
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

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One day they must learn that cake and ice cream are both good in their own way, similar to apples and oranges or Coke and Pepsi.

Missed the bit where it says "Hails himself as a loner"

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Old 01-25-2013, 07:13 AM   #887
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Old 01-25-2013, 07:26 AM   #888
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Old 01-26-2013, 02:49 AM   #889
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

Nooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!

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Old 01-26-2013, 11:44 AM   #890
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6


so basically WB are using the cutscenes from the game and turning it into a full length movie.

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Old 01-26-2013, 03:56 PM   #891
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

A movie based on a game based on a toy and a comic!

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Old 01-26-2013, 04:08 PM   #892
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

inception

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Old 01-26-2013, 07:57 PM   #893
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

Or you could watch one of the many compilations of it on youtube for free.

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Old 01-27-2013, 07:08 PM   #894
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

http://deadlymike.deviantart.com/gallery/








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I was at some diplomatic party once. Got to talking to this princess who told me that when it came to Superman, I was missing the point. She told me, "His real strength lay in his generous spirit and sense of what's fair." - King Faraday

"
Hes much more of a working class superhero, which is why we ended the whole book with the image of a laboring Superman. Hes Everyman operating on a scifi Paul Bunyan scale." - Grant Morrison

"Self Portrait" By Batman
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Old 01-27-2013, 07:36 PM   #895
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lencho01 View Post

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New 52 Flash SUCKS
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Old 01-27-2013, 08:01 PM   #896
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inception
Adaptception!

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Old 01-27-2013, 08:33 PM   #897
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I was at some diplomatic party once. Got to talking to this princess who told me that when it came to Superman, I was missing the point. She told me, "His real strength lay in his generous spirit and sense of what's fair." - King Faraday

"
Hes much more of a working class superhero, which is why we ended the whole book with the image of a laboring Superman. Hes Everyman operating on a scifi Paul Bunyan scale." - Grant Morrison

"Self Portrait" By Batman
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Old 01-27-2013, 09:37 PM   #898
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Default Re: LOL "I'm Batman" - Part 6

[QUOTE=Panthro;25050519]

And yet, not telling a friend the truth - that her feelings are not reciprocated - is even more hurtful. There in lies the tragic conundrum - should he lie or should he just tell her the truth and have done with it? He shouldn't pretend to like her when he doesn't, because then he's unhappy, and when the truth does eventually come out she'd be even more hurt for the lack of honesty. Or he could just ignore her until she finally figures out that he doesn't like her and hope she gets over it. He's pretty much screwed no matter what he does.



[\QUOTE]

You don't account for two things in this:

Clark does like Karen,... Just not the way he does Diana.
Who knows what would've happened if Superman had looked at Powergirl as someone other than his cousin from another dimension?
(Steering real close to one of my complaints about DC universe relationships.)

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Old 01-27-2013, 10:29 PM   #899
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You don't account for two things in this:

Clark does like Karen,... Just not the way he does Diana.
And that's why he should be up front with Karen and tell her "I'm sorry but I'm just not into you." I'm not saying he'd enjoy hurting her feelings but seeing as how he obviously doesn't like her the way he liked Diana there's nothing to gain from being dishonest about it.

Quote:
Who knows what would've happened if Superman had looked at Powergirl as someone other than his cousin from another dimension?
(Steering real close to one of my complaints about DC universe relationships.)
I have a feeling it wouldn't work out.

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Old 01-28-2013, 03:34 PM   #900
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I was at some diplomatic party once. Got to talking to this princess who told me that when it came to Superman, I was missing the point. She told me, "His real strength lay in his generous spirit and sense of what's fair." - King Faraday

"
Hes much more of a working class superhero, which is why we ended the whole book with the image of a laboring Superman. Hes Everyman operating on a scifi Paul Bunyan scale." - Grant Morrison

"Self Portrait" By Batman
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