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Old 01-14-2014, 10:46 PM   #1
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Old 01-14-2014, 10:46 PM   #2
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Old 01-14-2014, 10:46 PM   #3
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werk it gurl.

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:46 PM   #4
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And that is how you start a new thread, kids.

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:47 PM   #5
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bravo

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:49 PM   #6
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Pfft. I've seen better guy butt than that.

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:50 PM   #7
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People need to show Aquaman some respect.

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Aquaman, King of the Seven Seas, Has ****ing Had It With You, Man.

BY Glen Weldon

- - - -
First off, I don’t talk to them. OK?

That’s, like, the first thing. Let’s start there.

It’s not like I’m all, Hey, Peter Pufferfish, what’s up? and he’s all, Yo, nothing much, brah.

It doesn’t work like that, all right? I mean, most of them don’t even have brains, for one thing. They have maybe a bump at one end of their spinal cord, a pimply little swelling of ganglia, if they’re lucky.

Language is not a looming issue, is what I’m saying.

No, how it works is: I command them. Period, the end. Command, as in bend them to, you know, my will and whatnot. ****in’ A.

Even the ones with actual for-real brains, the cetaceans. If I want, you know, a pod of Burmeister’s porpoise to ram the hell out of Black Manta’s Manta Sub, that **** gets done. If I totally want, like, a southern minke whale to go hump a giant squid (its most hated enemy, by the way), I just go doodoodoodoodoodoo and it’s like Show World down there. Not that I would, because, you know, gross, but I’m just saying: I don’t ask. I’m not going to be all, If you wouldn’t mind terribly much, please, Mr. Southern Minke Whale, go get your nasty freak on with that giant squid.

Just, you know, FYI.

And it’s not training. I read that on some blog: “He just trains them to do all that.”

Dude, I can get 6 million krill to gunk up the engine of a getaway ship by having them hurl themselves up the intake jets. Mass sea-monkey suicide. OK? Try that **** with operant conditioning, with some big-titted blondie waggling a smelt, see what you get. Think they’re meting out kick-ass sea justice over at EPCOT? Shyeah.

But everyone takes their shot. ****ing YouTube and ****. Cartoon Network. Suddenly every hacky comic’s got a tight five-minute chunk on lame old Aquaman. “Haw haw haw, he’s so laaaaame, hee hee hee, go talk to a guppy!”

It’s all good. Somehow I manage to suffer through it. I soldier bravely the **** on, comforted only by the small but telling fact that I’m absolute goddamn ruler of—what was it again?—oh, yeah: the EARTH.

The PLANET.

And you, you’re, like, star of open-mike night at the Mirth Shack in Jacksonville. And your MySpace blog? OMG! ROTFLMAO!

You used to be cool, man.

When you were a kid, you’d sit at the bottom of the Stupaks’ pool, remember? Used to sit there and pretend the kickboard between your knees was Storm the Giant Seahorse, and you’d stay under for as long as you could, going doodoodoodoodoodoo.

Remember there was that orange T-shirt you had? Remember that? That was cool.

You sure seemed like a happy little kid.

But, you know, I get it. Whatever, that was a long time ago. Now you’re all, Wonder Woman never even let him fly her plaaaane, and whatnot. And that’s, you know, fine.

I could command you. You, those Robot Chicken *******s, alla y’all. Command you all to, you know, quit it.

I don’t make, like, a big deal about that, but I could. You’re just a fish at heart, dude. Down deep in your forebrain. I ****in’ could.

But I won’t. That’s not how I roll. I’m a hero. Plus, I’m King of the Seven Seas, so, you know, I got **** to do, right?

No, it’s fine. You rock on with your bad self, dude. Mazel tov.

Seriously, though, leave my lady out of it. That’s not cool, man. Mera, she doesn’t get it like I do. She’s sensitive. I start hearing you talking **** about her, or her hard-water powers, or that time she turned evil, and I will **** your **** up. Count on it.

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:50 PM   #8
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Pfft. I've seen better guy butt than that.
Henry Cavill in The Tudors?

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:50 PM   #9
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You want I should post a few gifs of better guy butt?

I'll do it, people. I'LL DO IT.

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:51 PM   #10
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Meh; before you know it, we'll get a "supposed scoop" that goes along the lines of this.




*BIG SCOOP*

- Amy Adams was spotted dragging a bed on the set of BVS. When asked about it, she responded by saying that Snyder had originally wanted to do a love scene between Lois and Clark at the lake house, but because they couldn't find the right bed, he opted to do a simple kiss scene instead. In response, Amy rushed to her trailer and took out her own bed so that she could move things forward as originally scheduled.

Source: El Cosmic Fridge


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Old 01-14-2014, 10:52 PM   #11
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Henry Cavill in The Tudors?

More like the Tooters. He tooted that thang up and swung it around to daddy.


I'm daddy, btw.

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:52 PM   #12
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Henry Cavill in The Tudors?
That sounds delightful, but this is neither the time nor the place.

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:53 PM   #13
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Pfft. I've seen better guy butt than that.

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:53 PM   #14
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Originally Posted by herolee10 View Post
Meh; before you know it, we'll get a "supposed scoop" that goes along the lines of this.




*BIG SCOOP*

- Amy Adams was spotted dragging a bed on the set of BVS. When asked about it, she responded by saying that Snyder had originally wanted to do a love scene between Lois and Clark at the lake house, but because they couldn't find the right bed, he opted to do a simple kiss scene instead. In response, Amy rushed to her trailer and took out her own bed so that she could move things forward as originally scheduled.

Source: El Cosmic Fridge

And JETT can confirm this!!

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:54 PM   #15
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Originally Posted by ThePowerCosmic View Post
More like the Tooters. He tooted that thang up and swung it around to daddy.


I'm daddy, btw.
I thought you were momma and I was daddy?

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:56 PM   #16
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VIDEO-CLick to Watch!:


I always loved this scene. It shows how useful Batman is to the Trinity despite him being powerless. Superman/Batman: Apocalypse is basically a Trinity film, I wouldn't be surprised if some elements from it are used in Batman vs Superman.

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:57 PM   #17
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I thought you were momma and I was daddy?
I'm androgynous, so I go back-and-forth.

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:58 PM   #18
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People need to show Aquaman some respect.
This is some funny s**t! Oh my god, I'm rolling over here!

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Old 01-14-2014, 10:58 PM   #19
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After reading that, Aquaman NEEDS to be in this movie!

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Old 01-14-2014, 11:00 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mclay18 View Post
It was Robert Burnett's tweet: "Oh COME ON people...EVERYONE knows Dwayne Johnson is playing DARKSEID in the JLA movie. Wait...was I not supposed to say that?"

I wouldn't take that at face value.
The Rock is perfect for Darkseid. He has that Darkseid arms folded behind the back intimidating stance thing down.





Last edited by Masone; 01-14-2014 at 11:03 PM.
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Old 01-14-2014, 11:03 PM   #21
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This is some funny s**t! Oh my god, I'm rolling over here!
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheNextNolan22 View Post
After reading that, Aquaman NEEDS to be in this movie!



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Old 01-14-2014, 11:03 PM   #22
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The Rock is perfect for Darkseid. He has that Darkseid arms folded behind the back intimidating stance thing down.



Spoiler!!! Click to Read!:
I'm not a fan of his voice for Darkseid. He has the look, though I'd expect heavy makeup to make him look like his face is a rocky substance.

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Old 01-14-2014, 11:08 PM   #23
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oh look, its Thad Castle

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Old 01-14-2014, 11:08 PM   #24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by herolee10 View Post
Meh; before you know it, we'll get a "supposed scoop" that goes along the lines of this.




*BIG SCOOP*

- Amy Adams was spotted dragging a bed on the set of BVS. When asked about it, she responded by saying that Snyder had originally wanted to do a love scene between Lois and Clark at the lake house, but because they couldn't find the right bed, he opted to do a simple kiss scene instead. In response, Amy rushed to her trailer and took out her own bed so that she could move things forward as originally scheduled.

Source: El Cosmic Fridge

But seriously… What is this from?

And whats with that huge red stan??

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Old 01-14-2014, 11:11 PM   #25
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The Rock is perfect for Darkseid. He has that Darkseid arms folded behind the back intimidating stance thing down.




But, erm...that's not a hard thing to do. And it surely isn't a reason to say the Rock is ideal for such a role.

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