What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
The funeral costs would be prohibitive.
If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?
Nah. I think mimes hate noise.
If a word in the dictionary were mispelled, how would we know?
Google it.
Is there another word for synonym?
is there?
Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
Probably, but then they'd go on a guilt trip.
Do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
Of course, safety first.
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
It might give them indigestion.
If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
Yes, he'd be insane talking to himself.
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
nah. he's just nuts.
How young can you die of old age?
50
If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?
I despise heat, so no.
How many people does it take to change a searchlight bulb?
It all depends on their IQ
Is it still real to you?
is it?
Post 5 songs/singles you want us to listen.
Pumped Up Kicks, Maybellene I Hofteholder, Daylight Dies, Dying Breed, & Through the fire & flame
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
Yes. He didn't pay his mortgage.
Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?
to keep everyone happy, I suppose.
What do batteries run on?
people's adrenaline
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
Yes, take him to the cleaners.
Do you have any infractions? If so, do you care to tell us how you got them?
None at this time.
What is your least favorite word?
Bills or Payments
What turns you on?
Good looking women
What turns you off?
People who consider themselves "know it alls"
What sound do you love?
Rain
What sound do you hate?
Blaring trains
What is your favorite curse word?
Ryhmes with luck
What profession other than yours would you like to attempt?
Acting
What profession would you not like to do?
The medical field
If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?
Nothing special, only to be welcomed.
Are there any questions?