Best excuses to call out of work with?

[Drakon]

"Last night, my family was killed by a rival ninja clan. I must avenge them. I'll be a little late tomorrow, too."

 

[Cunning Stunts]

"I just pissed my pants."

 

[Ace of Knaves]

I got pissed out of my head last night and ended up sleeping with an albino midget hooker.

 

[Shuley]

i'm not off til next saturday, and have been off one day since may 24-ish. i just need some me time

need time off? To what draw?

 

[simplysuperhero]

It's easy to say you're not feeling well over the phone. It's another to explain to your co-workers what happened when you get back, especially the ones who have a strong work ethic and expect the same from you.

I rotate my excuses: between g-i issues, back problems, and migraine.

I try not to call in sick (if I'm not) when others at work are going to have to work more to cover for me.

 

[The Impaler]

Once called in sick claiming alcohol poisoning... I was actually hungover.

 

[Wiseman]

"Last night, my family was killed by a rival ninja clan. I must avenge them. I'll be a little late tomorrow, too."

Then I call in to your work tomorrow and pretend to be the leader of a rival ninja clan looking for you

 

[SuBe]

I just go to work. Sick Days are for the weak.

 

[simplysuperhero]

I just go to work. Sick Days are for the weak.

You're hired!

 

[Drakon]

Then I call in to your work tomorrow and pretend to be the leader of a rival ninja clan looking for you

Man, that'd be so epic win.

 

[Majic Walrus]

Dude Wiseman. I seriously do plan on calling in on Friday of this week. If you'd like I'll PM you my bosses number.

 

[Wiseman]

Dude Wiseman. I seriously do plan on calling in on Friday of this week. If you'd like I'll PM you my bosses number.

You plan your days to call in 5 days in advance? I like your style

 

[Majic Walrus]

You plan your days to call in 5 days in advance? I like your style

I like to be prepared, also I've got stuff to do on that day.

 

[Kane52630]

Drakon, are you slowly becoming a T-800?

 

[Colossal Spoons]

Bill, not again lol

 

[AndThePickles]

We all have those days where we just need a day off. What's your best excuse to get out of work with?

Go to work, you!

 

[Jennifer Walters]

Go to work, you!

Haha. I'm totally not calling out. What do you two think I am?! A slacker?!

 

[NewYorkSpider]

Best excuse? Tell them you accidently watched both Fantastic Four movies. They'll feel sorry for you.

I rarely call off work. I did earlier in February because of a bad leg and had the stomach flu.

 

[Doomed_hero]

"I just went back in time in a delorin and had to find a way to fix the car and also reunite my parents at a dance since my mom fell in love with me and not my dad and only them kissing would make sure i was not whipped from history. It worked and I found a way back to find info i gave Doc saved his life from terrorist mad cause he stole platonium from them"

 

[Drakon]

Drakon, are you slowly becoming a T-800?

Error 404: Answer not found.

I rarely call off work. I did earlier in February because of a bad leg and had the stomach flu.

I should try this.

 

[redmarvel]

Hi, boss, you know that thing we did last night? Well, you managed to get me sooo tired, I just don't think I could handle you today. Mark me out sick, would you? Thanks, you're such a honey.

 

[Ace of Knaves]

"I'm sorry I won't be able to make it in today. I got bang on the jack and jills last night and was having sex with a 57 year old prostitute named Bertha till 6 o'clock this morning"

 

[Kane52630]

^^ and your Fired!
lol

Drakon, *reprogram him* Im John Connor! Do you Compute!?

 

[Shemtov]

Drakon, are you slowly becoming a T-800?

He's alraedy on his way to being a cyborg.

 

[Ahura Mazda]

When I am truly sick, I call my secretary to say I am not coming in. With technology nowadays, I can follow my emails from home.