Action-Adventure Borderlands - The Movie

Like I said in my review, it's so wild that Kevin Hart was funnier than Jack Black in this movie and Kevin Hart was not even trying to be the funny guy.

The movie has money on screen but that script, story, and dialogue are so terrible.
 
Maybe it's because of the insane backlash but I honestly didn't think it was as bad as I expected it to be. Sure it's not good, and most of the characters feel miscast but I've seen many other bland blockbusters on this same level get a lot better reviews. I wouldn't really recommend it though, for me it was like a 2/5 "fine to see once but wouldn't rush to see it again" but by no means would I put it in the same rating category as like a Madame Web for example.
 
I mean if we are to give any positives I thought they did pretty well with the look of the film in terms of capturing Pandora and the character designs themselves felt pretty good (even if we've discussed some of them feeling miscast but that's a separate issue). Unfortunately the rest is just so by the numbers, the script is very generic and there's no memorable lines. Characters just feel pretty flat and one note and arguably has a lot more to them in the games.

For me the biggest issue with this movie is that it's a decade too late though. This really should have come out in like 2013, capitalizing on the success of Borderlands 2 (the most beloved game of the franchise). Because back then the Borderlands games were something fresh and exciting. The issue for me is that in 2014 you have 2 movies that in different ways are very Borderlands-y. Mad Max Fury Road has a lot in common with this (Borderlands obviously taking a lot from the original Mad Max trilogy) and you have a big desert setting movie with some weird characters and the war boys and Immortan Joe definitely have that same sort of energy as the psychos in Borderlands. Then you also have Guardians of the Galaxy which does the whole "misfit group of adventurers go on a quest" set to different rock and pop songs.

This should have been something fresh and exciting in 2013 before you got another 2 Mad Max movies and multiple GotG movies (and similar vibing films like Suicide Squad etc) but instead this just slips out the back like a wet fart and fails to live up to any of the bars set by some of those other films. When I saw the runtime was 1 hour 40 minutes for a film of this 'level', I just knew.
 
I can't see that image of them all looking down that hole without thinking of the scene in the trailer where you clearly see a guy from the film crew at the top helping them open the hatch. I guess you shouldn't expect more from a 100 million dollar movie these days. :D
 
Eli Roth (or Tim Miller or whoever the hell really directed this crapfest) should challenge Uwe Boll to a fight over his comments. He would probably accept.
 
Would a Uwe Boll directed Borderlands really have turned out that much worse than this? If nothing else I'm guessing box office would be higher because some people would watch it just because they handed a 100m movie to Uwe Boll.
 
Would a Uwe Boll directed Borderlands really have turned out that much worse than this? If nothing else I'm guessing box office would be higher because some people would watch it just because they handed a 100m movie to Uwe Boll.
It probably would have been worse, only because there's no chance in hell the likes of Cate Blanchett and Jamie Lee Curtis would have signed on to a Uwe Boll movie.
 
It probably would have been worse, only because there's no chance in hell the likes of Cate Blanchett and Jamie Lee Curtis would have signed on to a Uwe Boll movie.
I'm surprised they signed onto an Eli Roth movie honestly
 
I saw this last week personally I enjoyed it but then again other than I think the tiny tina game I have not played any of the games in the series so I did not really have a frame of reference but I thought the characters were great and Jack Black stole the film as claptrap funny how he has been in the most money making video game movie and the worst money making video game movie ;) .
 
Never played any of the games. This didn't make me want to. Holy crap this was a mess. Madame Web at least is somewhat funny to reflect on. This was just....bad. Worst movie of the year so far I have seen
 

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