Boy's Family Sues over "Bullicide"

[Lighthouse]

Really? Is it the schools responsiblity to protect students or the parents responsiblity to train their kids not to bully and how to handle bullying

How exactly do you handle bullying?

 

[BlackLantern]

Really? Is it the schools responsiblity to protect students or the parents responsiblity to train their kids not to bully and how to handle bullying?

I would guess in most cases, the bullys parents see nothing wrong with that type of behavior...

bullying is serious and can cause serious damage...both menta and physical...Ive still got the scars...

 

[moraldeficiency]

Its a rough situation. There is no completely right train of thought or solution. There will always be bullies, there will always be victims. ANd yes, there will always be casualties. The only thing we can do is try to reduce the numbers of each the best we can.

The quote came out funny. I know it makes you feel weird and less yourself (I had a friend go through this) but if you don't you risk truely losing yourself in a very bad way. There's no easy answer or out here and I wish there was something better, but please take that ****.

I know they did commit suicide but that's also what happens when your cries for help are ignored. One kind word can really make a difference and the lack of it can be devistating. I'm just saying there's no way of knowing which type this person was.

Way I figure, and this has always served me well, the best way to deal with bullies is to not get scared of the idea of pain. Best way I can explain this is it's not getting punched in the face people are terrified of; it's the thought of getting punched in the face. We back down because the idea of violence either mental or physical is almost always worse than the actualitity of it. If a bully comes at you with words fire words back, if it's fists give them the same. Maybe you get your ass handed to you, maybe you win, but no matter what you're no long just prey in their eyes, you're something that will fight fire with fire. You get one good comment or punch in and that person will think twice before they come at you again and now you've just learned to stand up for yourself, not only that but you've just learned bravery cause chances are you were scared ****less at the time. Nothing wrong with a black eye or a broken bone, and much less paralyzing than the personal shame and fear that doing nothing causes.

 

[Spider-Who?]

Okay, I got some time to address your post...

So suicide hotlines are all bunk too? I think that kids that are suicidal could avoid being suicidal if they had a good family life with plenty of love and support.

I never said suicide hotlines are bunk. I do believe that you should try helping a suicidal person till the very end, until they get better or not. But the sad truth is, sometimes, no matter how hard someone tries to help, no matter how much the person is loved, there is no going back; their minds are too unhealthy and their outlooks too bleak. It is an illness, like cancer. You can take treatment after treatment, and some people get better, some don't. Doesn't mean you should stop treatment, nor call it "bunk".

Really? Is it the schools responsiblity to protect students or the parents responsiblity to train their kids not to bully and how to handle bullying?

Seriously? ...Damn straight its the schools responsibility to protect thier students and the parents responsibility to train their kids. Sadly, either one can fail, or completely disregard their responsibility.

For what? Being a *****ebag isn't a crime. Like I said earlier even if he gets charges of harrassment it will be a light light sentance.

Valid point, I'll give you that. Legally, there might not be anything one can do to punish the bully, unless his harrassment became physical. Doesn't make it right, or that he doesnt deserve any amount of punishment. My point was that he does deserve some amount of punishment, some kind of penence for his assisting in the death of this kid, but that the likley outcome would be nothing.

 

[terry78]

Don't shoot yourself, shoot the bully.



Wait....

 

[amazingfantasy15]

The quote came out funny. I know it makes you feel weird and less yourself (I had a friend go through this) but if you don't you risk truely losing yourself in a very bad way. There's no easy answer or out here and I wish there was something better, but please take that ****.

I know they did commit suicide but that's also what happens when your cries for help are ignored. One kind word can really make a difference and the lack of it can be devistating. I'm just saying there's no way of knowing which type this person was.

Way I figure, and this has always served me well, the best way to deal with bullies is to not get scared of the idea of pain. Best way I can explain this is it's not getting punched in the face people are terrified of; it's the thought of getting punched in the face. We back down because the idea of violence either mental or physical is almost always worse than the actualitity of it. If a bully comes at you with words fire words back, if it's fists give them the same. Maybe you get your ass handed to you, maybe you win, but no matter what you're no long just prey in their eyes, you're something that will fight fire with fire. You get one good comment or punch in and that person will think twice before they come at you again and now you've just learned to stand up for yourself, not only that but you've just learned bravery cause chances are you were scared ****less at the time. Nothing wrong with a black eye or a broken bone, and much less paralyzing than the personal shame and fear that doing nothing causes.

I'm not sure about this, I was small as a kid and as such picked on by bullies and the first thing I did was attack back, that didn't work. My parents told me I should just ignore them because all they really want is a response, to get a rise out of you, so I stopped fighting back (I never got too much physical bullying, more verbal), when they called me names I just ignored them. Sure it got worse for a short period, they were scared of losing their "punching" bag, but then stopped altogether because what's so fun about yelling or fighting someone who won't fight or yell back.

 

[moraldeficiency]

I'm not sure about this, I was small as a kid and as such picked on by bullies and the first thing I did was attack back, that didn't work. My parents told me I should just ignore them because all they really want is a response, to get a rise out of you, so I stopped fighting back (I never got too much physical bullying, more verbal), when they called me names I just ignored them. Sure it got worse for a short period, they were scared of losing their "punching" bag, but then stopped altogether because what's so fun about yelling or fighting someone who won't fight or yell back.

I had a similiar situation growing up. I was very small till I had a hell of a growth spurt at 14, so I was picked on. One of the best lesson's my father ever taught me was there's no shame in losing, the real shame is in giving up without trying. I never backed down and routinely got my ass kicked but as time went on it was less and less, I might have been small but I'd get a good shot or two in and no bully wants a shiner from a kid half his size to explain to other people. After 14 when I went from 5'8" and 100lbs to 6' and 165 I had a fun time "catching up" with some of those individuals.

Ignoring people never works, IMO. You confront and deal with the issue or it cannot be resolved. But that's true about anything.

I've unfortunately known far too many people that wouldn't mind hurting a defenseless kid at all. In fact they'd probably enjoy it more.

 

[amazingfantasy15]

I had a similiar situation growing up. I was very small till I had a hell of a growth spurt at 14, so I was picked on. One of the best lesson's my father ever taught me was there's no shame in losing, the real shame is in giving up without trying. I never backed down and routinely got my ass kicked but as time went on it was less and less, I might have been small but I'd get a good shot or two in and no bully wants a shiner from a kid half his size to explain to other people. After 14 when I went from 5'8" and 100lbs to 6' and 165 I had a fun time "catching up" with some of those individuals.

Ignoring people never works, IMO. You confront and deal with the issue or it cannot be resolved. But that's true about anything.

I've unfortunately known far too many people that wouldn't mind hurting a defenseless kid at all. In fact they'd probably enjoy it more.

I'm not saying it's always the best policy, really probably depends on the bully too, the bullies I had to deal with just seemed to want the attention. When I stopped giving them that attention, rising to their bait, it became a lot less "fun". Plus the large majority of it was verbal, not physical.

In high school, I did have to deal with some physical stuff, but that's when I changed tactics again and started using pranks to humilate the person. Don't really want to start anything with someone if it means after lunch you've gotta spend the rest of the day explaining why someone spilled chocolate milk down you're back.

 

[Nivek]

Most of the people I had issues with seemed to be sociopaths in training. The only thing violent bullies respect is their victim returning the violence in greater measure.

I have no sympathy for anyone that shrugs off bulling. The kids should be punished and given shaming psych help in school, not just the victims of the taunting... That was the hardest thing I had to live down in Jr. High after being attacked with Thugs with softball Bats, I got sent to the school psych councilor, but the thugs that threatened my life just got 3 days suspension. Guess what everyone remembered? That's right, the psych help...