G.I. Joe Anti-Hype

[That-Guy]

Just like a typical thread where you would discuss how excited you are for a film and predict it's box office, critical reception, sequel potential, etc., the purpose of this thread is to determine just how bad G.I. Joe will suck. I really do try to go into things with an open mind, but I have lost all hope for this movie.

Thus, the only way I can look at it in a positive light is to look forward to G.I. Joe as potentially the worst movie of the summer, and maybe the year (though I think Dragonballs: Pollution and Cheap Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li already have a monopoly on that title). So...

Who do you think will deliver the worst performance in the film?

How badly will this film bottom out at the box office?

Will there be a DTV sequel? (or prequel?)

Will this movie get above 10% on Rottentomatoes?

Will this be the final nail in Stephen Sommers' coffin as a mainstream director? Will they finally ship him off to The Asylum (where he should have been making movies all along)?

How many Razzies will G.I. Joe win, and for which categories?

How long will it take before G.I. Joe gets a reboot?

 

[Ace of Knaves]

The negativity in this thread is, disturbing. Don't get me wrong I think this movie will be crap. But is there really much point in creating a thread that will inevitably cause arguments and probably trolling?

 

[M.E.H.Z.E.B]

Negative reviews will fill this thread in no time.

 

[Hotwire]

Negative reviews will fill this thread in no time.

They're aparently overflowing from teh other negative reaction thread.

 

[bunk]

I think it'll make good money. Plenty of action and it has no competition.

Both Mummy movies probably have at least a better RT rating than Wolverine.

 

[I SEE SPIDEY]

Rotten tomatoes score: 25% Fresh.

Boxoffice: Opening weekend, 38mil total 95mil It should do over 100mil internationally.

Most will hate it so it won't get a sequel.

 

[Darkness Falls]

it looks pretty bad, from the trailer footage

 

[UltimateJustin]

I'm not gonna lie. Movie looks great. The accelerator suits sealed it for me; they look ta-dowwww. I was wondering how they were going to pull off G.I. Joe onscreen without having the multi-colored, differently themed characters looking like a bunch of, well, G.I. Jokes... but the accelerator suits make it mad believable, brah. Now THIS is a movie I won't be ashamed to go see opening night!

J/p, looks like the worst movie this summer, maybe the worst movie since summer 2004. Man, iRobot, Captain Skyhawk, Garfield, Catwoman, Van Helsing, AvP, The Village... what a harrowing year.

 

[thegameq]

Be warned, this movie is going after the same crowd ("it was fun, I was entertained") that made Transformers a big hit. Suffice to say, it was Transformers success that spurred this film's direction. So don't be surprised if it does well or at least better than expected. Like Transformers, GI Joe is an 80s icon (the toons anyway).

Personally, I hope it fails.

 

[Darthkush]

I still don't understand the hate. I really don't. Why does this look so bad to people and transformers looked so good. To me, they look IDENTICAL in quality. The only reason I'm more hyped about this than Revenge of the Fallen is I've already seen one Transformers movie suck but I haven't had a sucky gijoe yet. If this movie is awful, I'll treat it's possible sequel with the same distain and skepticism I now have for new Transformers films but until we see it, the negativity probably needs to calm down.

Neither of these things were REALLY made for fans as with Transformers we were thrown a bone of "we got Optimus' voice from the cartoon", here the bone is we "got Snake Eyes to LOOK like Snake Eyes". There's no difference...yet. On August 7th, we'll know.

But I think some of this hate just comes from the concept not being as popular with today's youth as Transformers or Star Wars or whatever.

 

[Ace of Knaves]

Yea from the trailers I've seen Transformers doesn't look much better than this. They will both be big, loud and explosive action films with crap acting, unfunny jokes and ridiculous plots.

 

[JRPJCDJC]

Just like a typical thread where you would discuss how excited you are for a film and predict it's box office, critical reception, sequel potential, etc., the purpose of this thread is to determine just how bad G.I. Joe will suck. I really do try to go into things with an open mind, but I have lost all hope for this movie.

Thus, the only way I can look at it in a positive light is to look forward to G.I. Joe as potentially the worst movie of the summer, and maybe the year (though I think Dragonballs: Pollution and Cheap Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li already have a monopoly on that title). So...

Who do you think will deliver the worst performance in the film? Rachel Nichols

How badly will this film bottom out at the box office? It'll clear it's budget by a couple dollars

Will there be a DTV sequel? (or prequel?) No

Will this movie get above 10% on Rottentomatoes? Yes

Will this be the final nail in Stephen Sommers' coffin as a mainstream director? Will they finally ship him off to The Asylum (where he should have been making movies all along)? No

How many Razzies will G.I. Joe win, and for which categories? Zero but it will probably be nominated.

How long will it take before G.I. Joe gets a reboot? Hopefully soon.

 

[thegameq]

I still don't understand the hate. I really don't. Why does this look so bad to people and transformers looked so good. To me, they look IDENTICAL in quality. The only reason I'm more hyped about this than Revenge of the Fallen is I've already seen one Transformers movie suck but I haven't had a sucky gijoe yet. If this movie is awful, I'll treat it's possible sequel with the same distain and skepticism I now have for new Transformers films but until we see it, the negativity probably needs to calm down.

Neither of these things were REALLY made for fans as with Transformers we were thrown a bone of "we got Optimus' voice from the cartoon", here the bone is we "got Snake Eyes to LOOK like Snake Eyes". There's no difference...yet. On August 7th, we'll know.

But I think some of this hate just comes from the concept not being as popular with today's youth as Transformers or Star Wars or whatever.

Everything that's been heard or seen speaks to the level of quality they are aiming for with this film. You don't need to be psychic to see what kind of film this is going to be and it ain't good...mind you, I'm sure no one here was expecting Shakespeare meets GI Joe. But sheesh, could their intentions to make a dumb actioner be any obvious.

Factor in the names involved with this film, etc., etc.

It doesn't exactly inspire confidence.

Oh, and you're right, it is on the same level as Transformers--which isn't something to brag about.

 

[That-Guy]

Well, personally, I may be one of the few people who liked Transformers... It wasn't brilliant filmmaking, but to me, I felt like it captured the essence of the series enough that I could enjoy it. Some things about it (the Allspark stuff, Megatron's design, Jon Voight) didn't work for me, but I still enjoyed the film. I thought the effects were good, I liked LaBouf and some of the other actors, I like Optimus and Bumblebee, etc.

I guess it's because as much as I love Transformers, I never viewed it as something that took itself too seriously. G.I. Joe is much the same way, but I guess it's just that (from what I've seen) it looks like they just made another forgettable, run-of-the-mill CGI action movie. At least Transformers had good effects going for it.

The effects look bad, the acting looks awful, the characters all look the same, and nothing other than Snake Eyes even remotely resembles its cartoon counterpart. And then there are the robo-suits, which are thrown in just add eye-popping visual stunts, all of which will likely look completely fake.

And of course, that horrible, horrible Cobra Commander design, which I think was the final nail in the coffin for a lot of us.

 

[UltimateJustin]

This is absurd.. G.I. Joe will be no where near the quality of Transformers. TF was not a prestige film, but there are very few PG-13 action films this decade as entertaining. On top of that, it delivered something new (big ass robots with generally accepted better-than-average CGI) and didn't desecrate the source material to Dragonball: Evolution levels, which G.I. Joe is doing. Were the "accelerator suits" used in the movie from a completely unrelated script? Where did that come from? The G.I. Joe team is a group of dudes who all wear the same special suit which allows them to jump around. That is a completely unrelated concept from the G.I. Joe we know, at least TF had car changing robots from the planet Cybertron engaged in a civil war.

And just look at the people behind the two films. Michael Bay doesn't direct smart action movies like James Cameron, Bay is notorious for ******ed, meaningless action movies, but at least he is the best at it and not the worst at it like Steven Sommers proved himself to be with Van Helsing. And now everyone adores the new Star Trek, but Orci and Kurtzman all ready proved their ability to ressurrect and update a franchise with TF. The G.I. Joe movie on the other hand is written/rewritten by guys who wrote The Watcher and Australia. Cool......

 

[Theweepeople]

I don't think the movie looks as bad as most are making it out to be. However, I'm perplexed at how the quality of Stephen Sommers movies appears to be going down while the budgets dramatically increase. The Mummy and Mummy Returns both had quality effects resulting from budgets under 100million. Van Helsing had mediocre to downright silly looking effects for a movie with a 160million budget. I personally don't think the effects for GI Joe look as bad as Van Helsing but, after seeing the trailers I can't believe Stephen Sommers spent 170million on this film.

 

[Timstuff]

Good lord... Have fanboys really sunken this low?

 

[UltimateJustin]

Good lord... Have fanboys really sunken this low?

Of course. Nice Wolverine rating.

 

[Antrax255]

This entire G.I. Joe Board is anti-hype.

 

[ClintF]

As much as I hate to agree with most, unless they got a 6 year old to direct this movie, that would be the only way to make it true to the comics/toons. They are more targeting people who have no idea what Gi Joe is, hence the idea of "just a movie to go see and be entertained", now Im sure they were trying to keep it as true to comics/toons as they could but of course didnt. If they did indeed look a lot like their toy counter parts then some characters would look like members of the village people, think thats why they went with the all sleek black outfits, now Im as upset as the next guy about the outfits/movie dont get me wrong.

 

[Ace of Knaves]

I think the suits look pretty bad ass to be honest.

 

[UltimateJustin]

I think the suits look pretty bad ass to be honest.

Where are the parrots, basketball jerseys and big-ass backpacks, most ask.

 

[JRPJCDJC]

Where are the parrots, basketball jerseys and big-ass backpacks, most ask.

Yeah, it's not necessarily garnering so much hate because they strayed from the source maerial but because they put absolutely ZERO EFFORT into staying close to it. That's really what's wrong with this movie... they didn't even try to get close to the source material.

We could be wrong but...

A. No 'Roadblock?' - they lost alot of people right there
B. Ripcord is now black? - That lost the rest of the people right there
C. Cobra Commander has a jellyfish for a head? - That scared of an other potentila fans

It don't look like we'll be seeing Duke in khaki's, Hawk in his bomber jacket, or Cobra Commander as... Cobra Commander, so this movie has problems.

I'd like to start working on a reboot right now but I think this is going to bomb so badly that their is no way a major studio will back another G.I. Joe movie.

How could it be made so it was closer to the source material? How could it be possible that an elite military organization has know conformity or any set uniform? Simple. They really don't want to do it. They really don't give a crap whether COBRA takes over the world or not. That's why Bazooka can chew bubblegum and wear a football jersey, that's why Shipwreck has a beard and a talking parrot, that's why their is fraternization, and that's WHY THEY"RE THE ONLY ONES WHO CAN COMBAT COBRA!

THAT'S WHAT G.I. JOE IS SUPPOSED TO BE YOU FLIPPIN' MORONS! NOT THIS!!

YOU CAN HAVE A WORLD OF FUN WITH MY VERSION OF G.I. JOE, HAHAHAHAHHA!!!!

 

[Ace of Knaves]

I don't know much about G.I Joe but if there was a soldier dressed as a pirate with a talking parrot I would laugh my ass off. That would just be ****ing stupid.

 

[JRPJCDJC]

I don't know much about G.I Joe but if there was a soldier dressed as a pirate with a talking parrot I would laugh my ass off. That would just be ****ing stupid.

If one were to write this script under the pretense that none of the JOES really want to do it, with the exception's of Duke and a few others then, well, the dialogue pretty much writes it self. Seriously, this could be some highly entertaining ****!

It makes perfect sense too. Duke has always been the character no one liked. So of course, he'd come off as just that by harpin' on everyones uniform and basic military etiquette to start off with. AND THAT"S how you keep Duke as the main charcter because it's kind of about his evolution as a charcter and winning over the team.

IT WOULD BE SO GREAT if early in this potential movie Duke is nitpicking on Snake Eyes about something and as Duke turns away Snake Eyes, black mask and all, flips him off.

You could make an entire movie without Cobra using this concept, just Duke nitpicking all the military etiquette and standards of everyone.

1. Gung Ho's attire
2. Bazooka's gum chewing and jersey
3. Roadblock's insistense on talking rhyme
4. Scarlett and Cover Girl's long hair and too revealing clothing
5. Shipwreck keeping a parrot in quarters
6. Snake Eye's not taking off his mask - EVER!
7. Breaker's beard

I think this is one aspect of G.I. Joe no one really talked about and one that really should've been included.