G8: Still Just As Action-Packed!

[Majik1387]

Honestly, I'm kind of inclined to agree.

Everyone on Grindr isn't a ****e, but I know for a fact there are a lot of people on there who have boyfriends and are still cruising for hookups.

While I agree with that, I don't agree that it's Grindr that's the problem.

Don't like Grindr... never will.

If your in a relationship, then come off the app. You may not be looking for anything, but even so most people on it are only looking for one thing and it's not healthy for the individual or their partner.

But what makes it unhealthy? I only ask because again, while I still browse on it, it hasn't been for hookups ever since getting in a relationship. Most the time I get messages from guys who are in the same place as me but are too shy for whatever reason to first say hello to me in person, but instead testing a hi on Grindr.

Idk in my single days in LA Im not even sure i met anyone on grindr i met more friends/dates/and occasional hookup on probably a much grimier place (adam4adam) (hey don't judge at least its not craigslist or a bath house lol)

And i oddly met several of my best friends in LA there. Meeting friends can be very hard in a city where you don't know many people.

As for my time using grindr i maybe only met someone once or twice.... Most of the time it was just late at night and it was fun to flirt with someone and i felt attractive when they'd flirt back. But it was late at night and i know i was never serious about meeting up.. And once the chat was over id pass out lol.

That also seemed to be what my friends would use it for 80% of the time....

So Im not very harsh about it. My straight girlfriends have described dating sites the same way...

Its just simply very hard to meet people

Agreed, but I also somewhat think that online chat does help people meet a bit too.
Personally I get annoyed by aimless flirting, but that's just me.

lol, i do love the fact someone said "what happened to the old way of meeting people?" umm... does he not realize gay men use to meet other gay men mostly by Bathhouses and Bars? Not exactly classy either... and a bathhouse is easily more disgusting than a phone app imo... it's incredibly difficult for a gay guy to walk into a coffee shop and just assume someone is gay (this is also why imo we find so many "flamboyant" guys.. not necessarily because it's there personality.. but because they want hit on, so they don't want people questioning if they're gay or not. They want people to know it.

also.. Apps arn't to blame imo.. it's gross people and stupid people that are the blame... You don't cheat, you don't have unsafe sex with a hookup, and you just don't be stupid.

not to mention.. this josh guy is an idiot.. he's throwing a fit over grindr and saying how disgusting it is, and it's just used for hookups, than states how he doesn't use it for such things ... i mean really? 1) either he's lying or 2) he's being honest but illogical. Surely if he's not using it for such purposes ... there's others who arn't either. it's a bit hypocritical he said "id never date anyone off grindr because "once a ****e always a ****e" when.. he's still using the app? sorry.. but logic works both ways... it can't be ok for you but not for them.

i sorta feel like this is nothing more than a gay rant because he's lonely and angry. I was always taught that people who are happy with there lives don't judge, because they have no room for it. Miserable people judge. This guy seem's miserable as all hell to me. This stuff (if what he says is true) has no reflection on him so it shouldn't bother him (if he was happy)

$10 says josh has a shirtless pic on grindr

Nope, but his Facebook, Jack'd, and I'm sure other profiles on sites/apps do.

On a related note, he does have a reason for being so bitter against Grindr, however, his bitterness wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for him; but that's getting into someone's personal life who's not even a member here.
I'll just say reading his post I felt like I was on the hype with a troll on full blast.

 

[Marx]

I'm not a fan of things like Grindr.

 

[Marx]

...so I was told this past weekend that my grandmother is of the belief that "if you let gays in the boy scouts...they'll all become gay".

 

[Hellion]

...so I was told this past weekend that my grandmother is of the belief that "if you let gays in the boy scouts...they'll all become gay".

 

[Schlosser85]

It's an epidemic, I tell you!

 

[Pfeiffer-Pfan]

How have I not seen this before... It's so wonderful.

http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/odd/new...-letter-of-acceptance-to-gay-son-picture.html

 

[Grillz]

So I decided that I was Bi, but I may have made one of biggest mistakes in my life.

Here is my wonderful story for anyone, careful though, it's a doozy

Spoiler

Okay, so I have a friend at college *let's call him John* (I know, never heard that before) who broke up with his girlfriend a few days before Valentine’s Day, so all of his friends (myself included) were there for him. So one night I was the only one he could hang out with, and he wanted to play some music. I went along with it because I knew he needed to keep his mind off his ex (even though he was over her quick). He played the piano, and I stood around, but he wanted me to sit by him on the bench, I did. He started giggling and played romantic music (one of them being Flightless Bird&#8230, and I just enjoyed the music, then later that night he wanted to play his guitar, and he started playing and singing more romantic music, then I think “he must really miss her”, but as we were leaving, he started glancing at me as we walked. I didn’t think anything of it, but that week we start to commonly exchange looks, sit right next to each other ( and if he sits in front of me with our friends, he constantly puts his foot on top of mine), glances at me while we walk, makes me laugh, always has his body pointed towards me. To me at least, these are tell all signs that he's interested. So one Sat. I text him (due to me being out of town) asking if I feel a “vibe” from him, and he said “Sorry no I’m strait”. So, one Monday (about 5 weeks ago) was the first time I saw him since we talked about “it”. We didn't mention what we discussed, but we both knew. He acted different around me, he would talk to me by way of our friends. What tipped me off that he felt uncomfortable was that he would turn his back on me, and even ignore me. Well, Tues. he sat right next to me with his back turned, so I "texted" to some people and I saw him turn his head towards me, so I was really confused. Then, at lunch and dinner he left about 20 min. in (which is strange because he never has before *nitpicking*), aka he always would stay and we would walk together about 45 min. after lunch starts. He looked really depressed, as was I. Anyway, today he was sitting in a room with one of our friends and he looked at me and invited me over to watch some funny vids with him and his friend. Eventually, our eyes met when we were talking and he was acting funnier (making funny jokes) than before, he was spinning around in his chair looking at me, and what was funny was that I think he got a bit excited because he "left" to the bathroom and came back wearing his jacket, covering up his "you know what". What confuses me the most is that, when he was leaving (now remember there are four of us in there), he leaves saying "by *my name*, see you later guys". So, I try to be just friends with him, and our eyes met and it was like electricity between us. I though “there’s something there” because he cannot stop looking at me, and he copies my exact movements, and he plays footsie with me, he knows I'm checking him and out and vice versa because I glanced at him, and he would constantly look right at me. So then one day, three of us were in his room, and I had to go out of town for the day, and he didn't want me to leave (aww). Then, I took a step back to see everything without a rose tint. I noticed that when our friends would see the two of us together, they would smile and be all giddy. At Dinner, I was waiting for him in "our spot", and of course, a very annoying girl decided to sit down and talk, moving my intrest a seat over. He didnt seem very happy about it, but anyway, we tried to play footsie, but we we're too far away, and it would be too obvious, so I figured that would be the perfect time to try something. I more or less gave off the "you slightly amuse me" vibe (because in the back of my mind I'm thinking he's just playing with my heart) , but I tried my best not too, needless to say, he left early kind of down. So here I am hating myself for what I did, so me and some friends and I layed in the grass, then you know who shows up with another one of our friends, and they start playing some music. We all enjoy it, but he isnt very enthusiastic, so they start playing lovey dovey songs, and one by one our friends start leaving, and the more romantic the music gets, the more into it he gets ( he was "shy" about singing amongst friends at first apparently) *even though he played it flawlessly with me*, and eventually it was just us two and a girl that was singing (she has a girlfriend btw), so we start to glance at each other, and we were back to the flirting. So one day I decide I'm ready to confront him due to his constant eye lingering (and his pupils constantly dilate), his body pointed towards me, and his quick (but noticeable) glances. The only problem, some *****e thought "hey, I like him too...", and totally tried to erase me out of the picture. My crush drives, and four of us are going to the movies, and I always get shotgun (hehe), and this other guy wanted shotgun for once, well my other friend (who I'm pretty sure knows about us) says, "hey *my name*, you get shotgun", his words pretty much trump either of us because he's my crushes best friend and roommate. So we're driving, and "our driver" constantly glances, and puts him arm by mine, you know same old same old, but when we get to the movies, our new friend wants to sit between us (grr). So the next day, some of us are in his room, and I'm right by his bed in another chair while our new friend is on his bed sitting by him, and wouldnt you know it: he has his whole body turned toward me, with a hand draping over the edge of his bed towards me. We decide to get something to eat, and our friend gets shotgun (grr), and wouldnt you know it, my crush isnt looking at him at all, except if he makes a joke, and his arms are so close to the wheel you think he's an old lady. *sigh* You still here? So with all of that you would think "he likes you dumbass", but the problem is when I try to actually do something about it, there's always an interruption. Always a friend popping in, and always that one guy attempting to get close to him.
One day I gave off the body language I wasnt interested, and behold he was quiet as a mouse (he always makes jokes during something we watch), then I started to warm up to him, and he was laughing and all that good stuff again; the cute part is, I couldnt help but have a little smirk on my face, and I look over and he does too. So yesterday, I more or less told him via text that I have feelings for him, and he replied "Is there anything I can do to help those feelings? Like have I been doing anything that I can help?", and he was apologizing to me because I told him my feelings for him are pretty new to me. I also noticed he really wants to help me any way he can because he constantly replied with things like "I still want to be friends and ill help if i can". Then when I told him we should talk in person, he says "Ok man if that's what your feeling we can".

So, here I am, feeling a bit accepting for whatever's to come, but somewhat defeated. Any advice on what to do when we talk (it wont be or two weeks because of Spring Break)?

 

[spideyboy_1111]

So I decided that I was Bi, but I may have made one of biggest mistakes in my life.

Here is my wonderful story for anyone, careful though, it's a doozy

Spoiler

Okay, so I have a friend at college *let's call him John* (I know, never heard that before) who broke up with his girlfriend a few days before Valentine’s Day, so all of his friends (myself included) were there for him. So one night I was the only one he could hang out with, and he wanted to play some music. I went along with it because I knew he needed to keep his mind off his ex (even though he was over her quick). He played the piano, and I stood around, but he wanted me to sit by him on the bench, I did. He started giggling and played romantic music (one of them being Flightless Bird&#8230, and I just enjoyed the music, then later that night he wanted to play his guitar, and he started playing and singing more romantic music, then I think “he must really miss her”, but as we were leaving, he started glancing at me as we walked. I didn’t think anything of it, but that week we start to commonly exchange looks, sit right next to each other ( and if he sits in front of me with our friends, he constantly puts his foot on top of mine), glances at me while we walk, makes me laugh, always has his body pointed towards me. To me at least, these are tell all signs that he's interested. So one Sat. I text him (due to me being out of town) asking if I feel a “vibe” from him, and he said “Sorry no I’m strait”. So, one Monday (about 5 weeks ago) was the first time I saw him since we talked about “it”. We didn't mention what we discussed, but we both knew. He acted different around me, he would talk to me by way of our friends. What tipped me off that he felt uncomfortable was that he would turn his back on me, and even ignore me. Well, Tues. he sat right next to me with his back turned, so I "texted" to some people and I saw him turn his head towards me, so I was really confused. Then, at lunch and dinner he left about 20 min. in (which is strange because he never has before *nitpicking*), aka he always would stay and we would walk together about 45 min. after lunch starts. He looked really depressed, as was I. Anyway, today he was sitting in a room with one of our friends and he looked at me and invited me over to watch some funny vids with him and his friend. Eventually, our eyes met when we were talking and he was acting funnier (making funny jokes) than before, he was spinning around in his chair looking at me, and what was funny was that I think he got a bit excited because he "left" to the bathroom and came back wearing his jacket, covering up his "you know what". What confuses me the most is that, when he was leaving (now remember there are four of us in there), he leaves saying "by *my name*, see you later guys". So, I try to be just friends with him, and our eyes met and it was like electricity between us. I though “there’s something there” because he cannot stop looking at me, and he copies my exact movements, and he plays footsie with me, he knows I'm checking him and out and vice versa because I glanced at him, and he would constantly look right at me. So then one day, three of us were in his room, and I had to go out of town for the day, and he didn't want me to leave (aww). Then, I took a step back to see everything without a rose tint. I noticed that when our friends would see the two of us together, they would smile and be all giddy. At Dinner, I was waiting for him in "our spot", and of course, a very annoying girl decided to sit down and talk, moving my intrest a seat over. He didnt seem very happy about it, but anyway, we tried to play footsie, but we we're too far away, and it would be too obvious, so I figured that would be the perfect time to try something. I more or less gave off the "you slightly amuse me" vibe (because in the back of my mind I'm thinking he's just playing with my heart) , but I tried my best not too, needless to say, he left early kind of down. So here I am hating myself for what I did, so me and some friends and I layed in the grass, then you know who shows up with another one of our friends, and they start playing some music. We all enjoy it, but he isnt very enthusiastic, so they start playing lovey dovey songs, and one by one our friends start leaving, and the more romantic the music gets, the more into it he gets ( he was "shy" about singing amongst friends at first apparently) *even though he played it flawlessly with me*, and eventually it was just us two and a girl that was singing (she has a girlfriend btw), so we start to glance at each other, and we were back to the flirting. So one day I decide I'm ready to confront him due to his constant eye lingering (and his pupils constantly dilate), his body pointed towards me, and his quick (but noticeable) glances. The only problem, some *****e thought "hey, I like him too...", and totally tried to erase me out of the picture. My crush drives, and four of us are going to the movies, and I always get shotgun (hehe), and this other guy wanted shotgun for once, well my other friend (who I'm pretty sure knows about us) says, "hey *my name*, you get shotgun", his words pretty much trump either of us because he's my crushes best friend and roommate. So we're driving, and "our driver" constantly glances, and puts him arm by mine, you know same old same old, but when we get to the movies, our new friend wants to sit between us (grr). So the next day, some of us are in his room, and I'm right by his bed in another chair while our new friend is on his bed sitting by him, and wouldnt you know it: he has his whole body turned toward me, with a hand draping over the edge of his bed towards me. We decide to get something to eat, and our friend gets shotgun (grr), and wouldnt you know it, my crush isnt looking at him at all, except if he makes a joke, and his arms are so close to the wheel you think he's an old lady. *sigh* You still here? So with all of that you would think "he likes you dumbass", but the problem is when I try to actually do something about it, there's always an interruption. Always a friend popping in, and always that one guy attempting to get close to him.
One day I gave off the body language I wasnt interested, and behold he was quiet as a mouse (he always makes jokes during something we watch), then I started to warm up to him, and he was laughing and all that good stuff again; the cute part is, I couldnt help but have a little smirk on my face, and I look over and he does too. So yesterday, I more or less told him via text that I have feelings for him, and he replied "Is there anything I can do to help those feelings? Like have I been doing anything that I can help?", and he was apologizing to me because I told him my feelings for him are pretty new to me. I also noticed he really wants to help me any way he can because he constantly replied with things like "I still want to be friends and ill help if i can". Then when I told him we should talk in person, he says "Ok man if that's what your feeling we can".

So, here I am, feeling a bit accepting for whatever's to come, but somewhat defeated. Any advice on what to do when we talk (it wont be or two weeks because of Spring Break)?

unfortunately sexuality isn't always black and white, we've all been in situations like this. Sometimes our intuition is right, and other times we want it so badly that we over analyze and try to make sense of what we really want to see. Also, sometimes it's really hard for others to make sense of what they're feeling, he might not be able to figure out his own emotions either. I think what's most important is to nto ruin your friendship over it. And it might be best to take a step back and try to figure out a way to lessen those feelings towards him. Try to let go of those feelings, and if they're meant to be... it will happen.

Just don't chase after something he says isn't their while you miss-read all the signs.

 

[Grillz]

That's what I've come to the conclusion of, matter of fat I think the screw up part was when I said "we should talk" because I have no clue as to what I will say.

 

[spideyboy_1111]

That's what I've come to the conclusion of, matter of fat I think the screw up part was when I said "we should talk" because I have no clue as to what I will say.

yeah, I had a best friend who called me every morning to wake me up and come hang out with him, he made me mixed tape CD's and wanted to spend every waking moment with me... and he was gay on top of all that. I took it all as signs when he just really enjoyed my company as a friend. We see things we want to see sometimes unfortunately. And we want to blame them for leading us on when ... they really had no intention of it.

 

[Ultimatehero]

How have I not seen this before... It's so wonderful.

http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/odd/new...-letter-of-acceptance-to-gay-son-picture.html

Amazing letter.

 

[Lightning Strykez!]

How have I not seen this before... It's so wonderful.

http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/odd/new...-letter-of-acceptance-to-gay-son-picture.html

Brought tears to my eyes.

 

[Grillz]

yeah, I had a best friend who called me every morning to wake me up and come hang out with him, he made me mixed tape CD's and wanted to spend every waking moment with me... and he was gay on top of all that. I took it all as signs when he just really enjoyed my company as a friend. We see things we want to see sometimes unfortunately. And we want to blame them for leading us on when ... they really had no intention of it.

Too true, at least I'm not blaming him; I'm just debating whether or not I should actually talk to him about it (and it seems he wants too), but I dont want to ruin an awesome friendship.

 

[spideyboy_1111]

Too true, at least I'm not blaming him; I'm just debating whether or not I should actually talk to him about it (and it seems he wants too), but I dont want to ruin an awesome friendship.

just apologize to him, and say you're just going through some stuff and figuring things out. And thank him for trying to help you with that.

Just remember, you want a guy that WANTS you. Not a guy who has to fight himself figuring out if he wants you or not... that also just means it'd be a long up hill battle to try to get the "normal" kind of relationship you deserve and probably want.

So, if he figures it out and wants you... awesome. But don't expect it, don't hope for it, and try to find a guy or gal out there who does like you for you and knows it.

 

[Schlosser85]

I pretty much agree with spideyboy.

The #1 priority should be, don't do anything too rash or poorly thought-through and damage your friendship. You're friends first and foremost, so don't risk what you have right now, on a possibility.

Let him come to you, if he wants to. Don't pressure him. If he's confused, you don't want to freak him out.

One final bit of advice...it's very easy to read too much into things and overanalyze and convince ourselves that we're seeing what we want to see. Spideyboy has done it, I've done it, I think most gay people have done it, especially with straight friends (or gay ones that we have more-than-platonic feelings for, for that matter). I've done it several times. I am NOT saying you're mistaken, because I am in no position to know that. I'm just saying...tread carefully and don't do anything hasty.

 

[Grillz]

Thanks for the support and sound advice guys.

The #1 priority should be, don't do anything too rash or poorly thought-through and damage your friendship. You're friends first and foremost, so don't risk what you have right now, on a possibility.

Let him come to you, if he wants to. Don't pressure him. If he's confused, you don't want to freak him out.
I am NOT saying you're mistaken, because I am in no position to know that. I'm just saying...tread carefully and don't do anything hasty.

Yeah, now that I've had some time really think about it, yeah there are signs that could easily be mistaken, then there are some that aren't, but I will let it happen if it happens, and if not, I have a great friend and that's all that matters.

Edit: I texted him eariler, telling him more or less that as long as we're friends that's all that matters. Long story short, he agrees and said as long as we know that we are good, everything's good.

 

[Marx]

I pretty much agree with what spideyboy and Schloss have said.

 

[Marx]

...finally came out to my younger brother earlier today. It went very well!

 

[Lightning Strykez!]

Wonderful news Marx.

 

[Ultimatehero]

Congrats Marx. Awesome news.

 

[spideyboy_1111]

<------ is a proud and happy bf

 

[Pfeiffer-Pfan]

Congratulations Marx... Wish I had your courage.

And your very very lucky Spideyboy. When you love someone you just want to let everyone know about it... t:

 

[spideyboy_1111]

Congratulations Marx... Wish I had your courage.

And your very very lucky Spideyboy. When you love someone you just want to let everyone know about it... t:

i'm just very very proud of Marx, and glad he got the exact response he deserved and needed after struggling with some not so great coming experiences with others.

 

[Marx]

Thank you guys! I also came out to a cousin and he reacted very well too!

 

[Mad Ones]

So I'm going to a gay bar for the first time in a couple weeks, but the problem is I don't know how to dance. Actually I can't dance. Despite all my efforts and wishing I have no rhythm or style. Especially compared to other gay boys.

I'm also going with my boyfriend so I don't know what kind of dancing is gay-bar-with-boyfriend dancing. I just don't know the etiquette haha. I've been so bored lately that I just want to go crazy and dance!