Has Anyone Ever Had a Quarter-Life Crisis?

[Warhammer]

I am having a quarter-life crisis. Long story short, I am 22. I graduate college in May. For three years, I thought I knew exactly what I wanted to do (the cliché pre-med/medical school path). Then one day this past January, I wake up and realize that I only wanted to do it for the money, not because I was interested in it. I have a hard time studying in something I am not interested in. After a long chain of events, here we are today. I am reluctantly taking the classes I have left in my major in order to graduate since I'm 80% done. And here I am now. No focus. No real initiative. Scared. Well, enough about me.

Anyone currently in or went through a quarter-life crisis?

And for those who don't know, a quarter-life crisis is exactly, here's good ol' Urban Dictionary's definition of it: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=quarter-life+crisis

 

[Ultimatehero]

I've went through a couple. Not in being confused on what I wanted to. I've always known, I'm doing it... But there have been a couple of times where I needed to take a big step back and look at my life and ask, "why am I doing this? Where's the fun and energy that used to be there? Where's my love for this rather than working for them?" Basically there have been times where my career starts becoming work and trying to please others rather than just doing it just because I love it pure. I'm unsure if this even would be considered quarter-life, since it's probably what leads to many temporary retirements for those in the arts or in sports or etc. Just the need to get back to that love for doing it. That's what my quarter-lifes have revolved around.

It's an average movie, but a speech in 'Driven' has always stood out to me during these times:

"You don't know who you are anymore! Somebody put it into your mind that you've gotta be perfect every time out or you're a failure. Well, forget that. Just forget it. (hands a trophy over) That's the first thing I ever won. And the last time I've ever felt pure victory. No pressure. Nobody breathing down my back. Just driving because I loved it pure. And that's what you gotta get back to. Doing what you do naturally just for you. I mean, I don't have your gift. But I got a couple of things that you don't have - I got will and I got faith. Wait, don't laugh, I'm serious. Because I believe you can will yourself into anything or do anything. And faith that's like having a good disease, it's contagious. If you hang around people who have it, you're going to catch it. And that's going to change your attitude. And winning? Is an attitude. So if you trust yourself, by the end of this season you'll either be on top or you won't. But, I guarantee you're going to know what you're really made of."

 

[PacificBoy]

I think such crisis is getting quite common. With the tech, the media, the popular culture as they are, we tend to grow up fairly quickly these days.

Note I said 'grow up', not 'mature'.

 

[knowsbleed]

I am having a quarter-life crisis. Long story short, I am 22. I graduate college in May. For three years, I thought I knew exactly what I wanted to do (the cliché pre-med/medical school path). Then one day this past January, I wake up and realize that I only wanted to do it for the money, not because I was interested in it. I have a hard time studying in something I am not interested in. After a long chain of events, here we are today. I am reluctantly taking the classes I have left in my major in order to graduate since I'm 80% done. And here I am now. No focus. No real initiative. Scared. Well, enough about me.

Anyone currently in or went through a quarter-life crisis?

And for those who don't know, a quarter-life crisis is exactly, here's good ol' Urban Dictionary's definition of it: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=quarter-life+crisishttp://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=quarter-life+crisis

I think you'll find practicing medicine a lot more fulfilling than just studying theories about it. You've invested so much time, energy and work to throw it all away without giving it a shot... you owe it to yourself and to your family to finish what you started and try to make your initial goal a reality.

That being said, if there is something you are truly passionate about and you know what it is... then go for it and make that your reality. But most people I know don't really know what they want to be "when they grow up"... including a lot of 40+ year olds... so count yourself lucky if you do know.

 

[Hobgoblin]

Today is my 33rd birthday. I guess I am having a 1/3 life crisis as I am in danger of losing my job, school is going kinda "iffy" at the moment and I still live with my father.

 

[Piper Maru]

I'm going through a crisis this very moment, and I don't see a positive outcome.

 

[runawayboulder]

I'm 34 and I've had a crisis like that. I'm fortunate to have a job right now and I'm taking classes online but man after seeing the recent events with the US gov't, I am not feeling too positive about the future. I'd like to own a house one day but things have been so lousy for so long, it makes me wonder if it's ever going to get any better.

I was talking to my father the other day about this stuff and I asked him if he's ever seen it this bad and he told me no. He's 65 and wants to retire in less than 2 years but isn't sure if he'll be able to. I've pretty much convinced myself that I'll be working until the day I drop dead. I asked him if things were this dreary for him when he was my age, in hopes that maybe I'm just taking it all to heart, but he said it wasn't that bad when he was in his 30's because the economy was booming back then. FML

 

[Steyin]

I'm 28 and still in mine sort of. Supposedly, according to some study (I forget what is was specifically), the typical quarter life crisis lasts for about 3-4 years, within the 24-29 age range.

Although this study was more so related to astrological stuff, and actually rang/rings quite true for what I've dealt with and am going through.

 

[Nathan]

I guess I am in one. The only reason I work is so I am not on the streets. But I don't do anything because I actually like doing it. I really have no drive, ambition, don't really see a purpose in leading this life.

I'm basically just running out the clock right now.

 

[Anita18]

I had a post-college crisis, for sure. It was mostly around the thought of, "So, this is what life is gonna be now? Get a job, get married, have kids, die?"

I have no yearning for "the American dream." That stuff has too much external factors for me to get worked up over. Who knows if we'll ever earn enough to buy a house here. Honestly, the thought of intentionally settling down for decades still bothers me. There's too much flux in the world now to take a bet like that. I'd rather have the freedom and the ability to adapt.

I'll be honest. Medical school is HARD, and frankly, if you're in it for the money, there are much faster and easier ways to do that. (Also, there's starting to be more focus on compassionate, patient-centered doctors, so I don't think people who are doctors for the money are gonna be in high demand in the future anyway.) Medical school puts you $200K in the hole first, with no chance to start making that back until you hit 30. My relatives and classmates who work on Wall St make a ton of money and could start right after college, if you're into that sort of thing. My cousin, who graduated with a biomedical engineering degree, actually had the choice of working on Wall St vs medical school, and my sister and I talked him into medical school because we're hippie idealists.

You have to take stock of your options, and there's no shame in feeling things out. I graduated 7 years ago with a biology degree and got a job at a research lab because it's what I could do with my degree, and it's only in the past few years that I figured out what I really wanted to do, and started working toward it. (I was lucky I had a very understanding and supportive boss who supported the move from science.) Money is nice, but I have no need for loads of money or power. I just want to help people, and I figured out a way to do it. That's what makes me happy, now and in the future.

You have time to figure things out. But, life is too short, even at our age, to be doing what doesn't make us happy. There has to be a balance. Obviously, you're going to need a job. But that doesn't mean you HAVE to pursue that career for the rest of your life. It also doesn't mean you have to be a slave to work if you don't enjoy it. My mom has her own hobbies, and her job was just a job. She never lost herself in it. My dad is quite the opposite - he'd happily work until he dropped dead, but lucky for him, it's thinking work, haha.

There's no one right way to live your life. The only person who can decide that is you, and you have to remember to stop, look around, and ask, "Am I enjoying what I'm working toward? Am I living life honest to myself?"

Good luck!

 

[Enriquespy]

I had/currently have one.

I believe that what is helping me a lot is focusing on choosing and prioritizing the rigth objectives. Truly knowing what you want can help you find a direction, and sometimes a little direction is all you need.

 

[Rorschach2012]

Enrique, dawg, get on those internet dating sites

 

[Enriquespy]

Ha, now Rorschhach2012 post makes no sense!