Have you ever not known what to do for a loved one?

[Ring Deacon]

I am at a loss. My wife went to a denist in December to have some cavitys filled. Just normal dental work. But since then she has had stabbing pain in the left side of her face that doesn't go away with any type of pain meds. She called the dentist a week after she had her work done and he said it was normal and would go away in a day or two. A week later she was still hurting so he said you must need a root canal done, come in and I will do it. When she went in he x-rayed her teeth and said he couldn't see anything wrong and to just go home. After that we did so research on webmd.com and found that her symtoms were very much like trigminal neuralgia. TN is a disorder that is caused by disruption of the trigeminal nerve. The trrigeminal nerve is a nerve that starts behind your ears and fingers out to areas of your face ( eyes, nose, mouth hairline and chin).

So we went to our doctor and told him what was going on. Before we could even ask about TN, he says i think i know what this is and runs out of the room. He comes back with a text book and another doctor and they say she has TN. Neither has ever seen it before thus the need for the book. So they put her on three different meds. One is a nerve blocker, the other a steriod and lastly a pain pill. For the week she was taking the meds she was fine, but now the pain is worse.

Experts call TN the suicide dissorder, and I can see why. My wife is in so much pain she is begging for death. She has even asked me to kill her. I will not do that and will not let her end her life over this. It could be fixed with surgery but the doctors will not go that route till all others have been taken. Why in the hell if she is in so much pain will they not do anything that they know will work? This is what is wrong with the medical system you can't just go to who you need to see or get what you need with out going through red tape.

My wife has been missing work and college over this due to she is not sleeping at night because when she lays down the pain is even worse. And the weather doesn't help because cold air makes it hurt more too. When she does sleep it is only after doubling up on pain pills to knock herself out. So she is then zombie like the next day. That ruins her ablity to work and study. So she has a choice everyday be in so much pain you want to die and could try to kill yourself at any minute or be drugged up out of her mind. She should have to do either.

I have asked her to call a lawyer over this. This would never have happened had the dentist not screwed up. But she said our family doctor doesn't think it's a good idea. I told her of course he is going to say that. No doctor wants to get sued or see one of their own sued.

Sorry for venting, but maybe someone on here knows someone with TN and has some advice.

Thanks
Rob (AKA Ring Deacon)

 

[AndThePickles]

I wish I had some advice, but unfortunately I do not. I just wanted to wish you the best, and I hope that all of this works out. I'm really sorry to hear about your situation...I can't imagine having to go through that kind of pain

 

[chaseter]

Just be with her and support her as much as you possibly can. But yes I would look into a lawsuit. Maybe then she can get properly treated at their expense.

 

[Ring Deacon]

I wish I had some advice, but unfortunately I do not. I just wanted to wish you the best, and I hope that all of this works out. I'm really sorry to hear about your situation...I can't imagine having to go through that kind of pain

Thank you. Like I said, I am at a total loss. All she does is cry from hurting so bad. I am helpless to do anything for her. As a husband I have done everything in my power to keep her happy, and safe fro harm. Hell I have even gone to a store at 3 am just to get her motrin and a heating pain when she hurt her back once. But this is something that is getting to me too. I hate to see her in so much pain. I would gladly trade places with her if I could.

 

[GuardianofOa]

Wow. Dude, I am so sorry to hear that. I wish I knew what to do, or had some kind of help to offer. The only thing I can say is just be there for her, no matter what. Don't leave her side, and most of all, don't let this stress you out because it's obvious that you need to be the stronger one here, for the both of you. I wish you all the luck in finding her the help she needs.

Oh, and go to a lwayer, this is malpractice, friend.

 

[Drakon]

I'm sorry to see this happening to you guys.

 

[Majic Walrus]

You probably don't want your wife to die so suicide or assisted suicide is out of the question.

You don't sound like a doctor so I doubt you're going to be able to cure her.

You could sue the pants of the dentist (which is something that I advise) but adding more problems and situations to your plate isn't going to help your wife no matter how much money you make.

Hopelessness breeds courage and bravery. My advice to her is to wake up every day and suffer through the pain, keep on keeping on. My advice to you is to encourage her and be there for her.

Just because you're powerless to make any real changes to the situation doesn't mean you can't change your attidutes outlooks.

 

[SuBe]

http://www.endthepain.org/

The Link is a Suppport Group for people and family with this condition. I hope you the best, and see what options you have with specialists.

 

[November Rain]

It's all about support, trying to instill some mind over matter and probably attempting to coach her with plenty of stress relief and meditation type qualities.

you should probably also ask to have your doctor refer you to a specialist.

you also can't lose hope, you have to be her rock and be completely positive throughout this ordeal, it's now that she needs you more than ever.

if you're religious pray but i would seriously suggest attempting meditation sessions or perhaps even going down the route of alternative medicine until the time comes for her surgery.

don't worry about suiing yet, that's what you think about once the problem has gone but in the mean time you need to 100% focussed on the pain management issue.

 

[SuBe]

You have 2 years to sue over malpractice also, seek help first, then talk to a lawyer later.

 

[Ring Deacon]

Pain managment is my main focus for her now. I have been surfing the web trying to find something that will work for her and not make her a zombie. But it is hard since she is already on the top med used for this. And since it isn't working she has had to just suffer through it. She thanked me today for not letting her just end it all. But it still doesn't take the pain away. I personaly am all for none alternitve meds that don't make her so sleeply. I have emailed a lawyer I know of today. I hope to hear from his office soon. I am also looking into a pain clinic for her in the meantime. I am being as strong as I can be in front of her. I can afford to break down right now.

 

[chaseter]

Go to a different doctor...get a second opinion. Sounds like she needs surgery now.

 

[moraldeficiency]

Now I know I'm gonna sound like a wiseass for saying this, but try weed. I had a friend that passed with cancer and weed was one of the few things that really helped her out in the end.

 

[DorkyFresh]

i'm sorry to hear about your predicament, but if i were you i'd follow this guy's advice.

Go to a different doctor...get a second opinion. Sounds like she needs surgery now.

this guy's advice ain't half bad either.

Now I know I'm gonna sound like a wiseass for saying this, but try weed. I had a friend that passed with cancer and weed was one of the few things that really helped her out in the end.

weed, while illegal in America, is a very underrated drug.

 

[Darthphere]

Now I know I'm gonna sound like a wiseass for saying this, but try weed. I had a friend that passed with cancer and weed was one of the few things that really helped her out in the end.

I was actually going to recommend this.

Also, seriously, you guys should go to the hospital, Emergency Room probably. They have a lot more powerful drugs than anything a doctor can prescribe to you right now.

 

[AndThePickles]

Also, seriously, you guys should go to the hospital, Emergency Room probably. They have a lot more powerful drugs than anything a doctor can prescribe to you right now.

I'd be afraid of her becoming addicted to some of those drugs. Working at a hospital has shown me just how much painkillers can affect people. I'd say that it's a last resort, as most of them would also make her very confused and out of it all of the time. Sounds like she needs surgery ASAP.

 

[Darthphere]

I'd be afraid of her becoming addicted to some of those drugs. Working at a hospital has shown me just how much painkillers can affect people. I'd say that it's a last resort, as most of them would also make her very confused and out of it all of the time. Sounds like she needs surgery ASAP.

The fact that she is calling on her own death and even asking to be killed pretty much means last resort to me. They need to make her as comfortable as possible now, they can worry about the side effects later. My dad is constant pain everyday, I know how bad it is. I don't wish this on anyone. Get the surgery, but get her pain free or as close to that possible now.

 

[moraldeficiency]

The fact that she is calling on her own death and even asking to be killed pretty much means last resort to me. They need to make her as comfortable as possible now, they can worry about the side effects later. My dad is constant pain everyday, I know how bad it is. I don't wish this on anyone. Get the surgery, but get her pain free or as close to that possible now.

Completely agree, I'm not a fan of prescription drugs or doctors but there are cases when they're needed and this is one.

 

[chaseter]

Drugs aren't needed...surgery is needed now.

 

[Darthphere]

Drugs aren't needed...surgery is needed now.

Of course surgery is needed, but surgery isn't going to happen 5 minutes from now. Get her comfortable, get her the surgery, get her pain free.

 

[chaseter]

I'd be afraid of her becoming addicted to some of those drugs. Working at a hospital has shown me just how much painkillers can affect people. I'd say that it's a last resort, as most of them would also make her very confused and out of it all of the time. Sounds like she needs surgery ASAP.

I have worked at a Pain Management office and you wouldn't believe half of the stories some of those people cooked up and how they act if they don't get their meds. I agree with surgery. Being drugged up for the rest of your life is not the way I would want to live either and I am sure that is a facet of suicidal thinking.

Surgery may fix it and if not...you are at the last straw anyways it sounds so you need to do something now. Waiting only makes it worse.

 

[chaseter]

Of course surgery is needed, but surgery isn't going to happen 5 minutes from now. Get her comfortable, get her the surgery, get her pain free.

They didn't go to the doctor yesterday...drugs aren't working.

 

[Darthphere]

They didn't go to the doctor yesterday...drugs aren't working.

The drugs the doctor gave them isn't working. There are many other alternatives and heavier drugs out there.

 

[Ring Deacon]

I'd be afraid of her becoming addicted to some of those drugs. Working at a hospital has shown me just how much painkillers can affect people. I'd say that it's a last resort, as most of them would also make her very confused and out of it all of the time. Sounds like she needs surgery ASAP.

We have done the ER thing and yes the med they gave her there worked. But for one thing they wouldn't send her home with dilaudid, and for another thing she doesn't want to be drugged out of her mind. She doesn't want to be an addict. we got her in with a nerologest next week, but that still doesn't mean we will get her the surgery.

 

[Darthphere]

We have done the ER thing and yes the med they gave her there worked. But for one thing they wouldn't send her home with dilaudid, and for another thing she doesn't want to be drugged out of her mind. She doesn't want to be an addict. we got her in with a nerologest next week, but that still doesn't mean we will get her the surgery.

They didn't do anything else at the ER?