Comics Marvel's House of WTF

[Auntie May]

Well, I still think Peter is the love child of Mary Parker and another man...she had an affair with

Spoiler

Nick Fury

 

[Auntie May]

Mary-Jane is hired to play the lead in a multimillion-dollar action flick by Michael Bay, being shot on location in the Deep South. There, Peter learns that Ben Reilly is still alive. Ben poses as Peter's cousin, dying his hair blonde. The Parkers so love the traditional Southern cooking that they decide to stay even after the movie wraps. Since there are no skyscrapers to swing off of, Peter rebuilds the Spider-Mobile. They dub it the "Uncle Ben."

The Parker boys, assisted by Mary-Jane (who now wears almost exclusively cut-off jeans) and Aunt May, fight the corrupt practices of County Commissioner Boss Norm (now the White Goblin, due to only wearing white, even after labor day) and Sheriff Otto J. Octavius. They also receive aid from the bumbling Deputy Enos Brock and mechanic Robbie Robertson in their quest for justice.

Proving some things never change, local paper magnate J. Jonah Jameson writes scathing editorials about Ben and Pete, despite them being just a couple of good ol' boys, never meanin' no harm...

OMG..this is funny. I can't get that Waylon Jennings song out of my head since I read it (and I don't even like country music )

Those cutoffs are actually called Daisy Dukes..when I was living in Texas many years ago and was volunteering for a day at a local community charity they actually warned me not to wear anything inappropriate (including Daisy Dukes)

 

[3dman27]

hey kenny mCcall whats your take on this thread?

 

[JLBats]

While fleeing a crime scene Spidey is shot. A little boy recovers the bullet, coated in blood, and sets out to make his own spidey. The new one which he creates by some miraculous coincidence kills Norman Osborn for some reason, then removes his mask in public. Real Peter is taken into custody, but escapes and realises he must track down the little boy... who is revealed to be the reincarnation of Norman Osborn for some reason even though he was born before Norman died! The arc ends when the clone Spidey kills the real Spidey, brings Harry back from the grave with Flash Thompson's blood and kill KidNorman. Clone Spidey proceeds to live the regular life like nothing happened... until 7 issues later when Harry tells MAry Jane what happened to real Peter...

 

[Ultimate_Superman]

Sounds like a plan to me.

You should make the thread though because they don't like me over there I spoke out on how Marvel's comics are right now and they got mad

 

[shinlyle]

You should make the thread though because they don't like me over there I spoke out on how Marvel's comics are right now and they got mad

They are living so far in denial that it is pathetic. I read alot of Marvel, always have, always will, but I knwo when I'm reading crap.

Amazing Spider-Man, New Avengers, Every X-book with the exception of Wolverine and Astonishing X-Men, Daredevil (which I used to like SO much) and so many others are sucking so hard right now. They really are.

DC isn't perfect by any means, considering the monosyllabic, growling, monologuing imbecile Batman that half of the writers use. They at least try not to screw the fans over for the sake of "Shock"....althought they do turn out a P.O.S. like "Identity Crisis" every once in awhile.


Both companies are the best they can be when they are focusing on the characters and what attracts readers to them in the first place. Dc just seems to be doing it alot more lately than Marvel. Look at the upcoming All-Star batman & Robin and All-Star Superman! DAMN! You don't see Marvel doing s*** like that anymore.

Until Peter David comes back to Spidey next year, I remain unhappy. Right now, I have Young Avengers, Runaways, Spider-Man: Breakout, Ultimates 2, Ultimate X-Men, Ultimate Fantastic Four, Astonishing X-men, and Hulk to keep me entertained.

 

[LarryLegend]

Harry Osborn comes back from the dead and reveals that the Norman we've recently seen is a clone. Harry then kills the Norman clone. Then its revealed that the Harry is also a clone created by Miles Warren. Warren kills the clone and then reveals he's been working all along for Aunt May, who blames Peter for Ben's death.

 

[dan1]

Harry Osborn comes back from the dead and reveals that the Norman we've recently seen is a clone. Harry then kills the Norman clone. Then its revealed that the Harry is also a clone created by Miles Warren. Warren kills the clone and then reveals he's been working all along for Aunt May, who blames Peter for Ben's death.

Who we find out is a genetic construct and not the real Aunt May. Norman was pulling the strings all along and Warren is miffed. He doesn't want to work for the guy who killed Gwen. But Norman lets him in on a secret. He didn't kill Gwen. That was a Gwen clone. Norman has been shagging Gwen for the last 10 years. He says she gets off on opium and magnetism. Norman is willing to share. This makes Miles happy. But Norman isn't really willing to share. He makes another Gwen and gives her to Miles. But heck, everyone's happy right? Well Peter feels like a million bucks until he finds out they are tossing his old girlfriend around like a salad. But Norman tells Peter, "Look son, I can keep cloning this girl, make genetic constructs that look like her too if I'm in the mood for constructs that day, you'll never know if you saved her or If I'm still shagging her. Plus you know I can make a white Goblin out of her and have her attack you where it hurts. So Give up on my schtick, will you? She made the first move Pete." After thinking about how he can raz Norman with a Mr. Coffee remark or hurt him with a Pizza Pie, he scratches his head and realizes, wow, I am Pathetic!"

I think I'll go have sex with my 10 year lying, also in on the joke, wife I have at home. If she IS my actual wife that is?.....

 

[3dman27]

pete finds out that he was born in the last part of the 21rst century and sent back in time to escape the cataclysm of 2099

 

[Orpheus]

May had an affair with Pete's Dad while his parents were together.

 

[mre]

May had an affair with Pete's Dad while his parents were together.

...This actually happened, you know?

 

[Electro UK]

Norman was the one who killed Peter's parents after he'd raped Peter's mum

 

[Ultimate_Superman]

Seeing this thread http://www.superherohype.com/forums/showthread.php?t=183991 lets me know it is time to bring back MARVEL'S HOUSE OF WTF

 

[Citizen_Kaine]

...This actually happened, you know?

Argggggg no mentioning the Trouble Miniseries here please, I have no idea what Milliar was on while writing it but lets just act like it never happened

 

[Sauron]

Argggggg no mentioning the Trouble Miniseries here please, I have no idea what Milliar was on while writing it but lets just act like it never happened

I guess we have to do that with a few things. (covers ears and rocks back and forth on the floor.) "It didn't happen, it didn't happen. I'm at Disney land and Gwen had no babies, Aunt May didn't do that."

 

[3dman27]

peter and mj are arrested on a public streetby the military police for being awol from th us army how can CIVILIANS be arrested by mps? mistaken identities the mp wanted brother and sister sgt peter parker and cpl.mary jane parker when our pete and mj keep getting mistaken for them spidey has to capture the awol twosome before not only are their reputaions ruined but mj and aunt mays protection by the avengers is lost

 

[Zev]

In a shocking plot twist, Mary-Jane takes off a wig and contacts to reveal that SHE is Gwen Stacy! All the times Gwen and Mary-Jane were in the same place was just chaos magic. The new woman has traits of both Gwen and Mary-Jane, thus keeping the comics more in line with the films, as it should be.

 

[Miss Webb]

Peter finds out he's not really a Parker. He's the love child of the Spider God and Queen Bee...

 

[Ultimate_Superman]

In a shocking plot twist MJ turns out to be a hologram. Wait that almost did happen in the comics.

 

[3dman27]

Seeing this thread http://www.superherohype.com/forums/showthread.php?t=183991 lets me know it is time to bring back MARVEL'S HOUSE OF WTF

every time i click this link i get a page saying
"error cannot find showthread"

 

[Citizen_Kaine]

In a shocking plot twist MJ turns out to be a hologram. Wait that almost did happen in the comics.

101 Ways to end the Clone Saga right?

 

[3dman27]

mj as H.O.M.E.R.?

 

[Ultimate_Superman]

A great movie for the house of wtf http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/251383

 

[3dman27]

Well, I still think Peter is the love child of Mary Parker and another man...she had an affair with

Spoiler

Nick Fury

are you sure it wasn't captain america?

 

[zanos]

MJ is really Peter's biological sister.