story reel

[Marvin]

hey guys

just looking for some input on this assignment i'm working on

it's a kid vs a train, and in it i'm going to animate the 5 seconds of train pushing

it's just the leica at this stage so it's a few of the inspirational drawing put together in continuity

the drawings themselves i'm going to change and put my own spin on.

[YT]PecmKBPibsk[/YT]

 

[wellsy]

I'd certainly be interested to see the finished result. Unfortunately, I'm an animation layman, so you'll excuse (I hope) my lack of any real help.

 

[WallCrawl]

I'd certainly be interested to see the finished result. Unfortunately, I'm an animation layman, so you'll excuse (I hope) my lack of any real help.

You don't need to be an animation expert to help since it's an animatic. At this point of the process a storyboard/animatic is used to work out the storyline, the story beats, the timing, the use of shots, composition, angles and layout.

The piece has a really good sense of pace and buildup throughout the beginning, but the time allotted to the payoff is much too short. I know that lengthening the climax means having to do more animation, which means more work, but as it is right now I think the moment passes so quickly that we can barely process it. There isn't enough time in the shots for the viewer to get lost in the emotional weight of it.

I also think you need to make it more clear that it's a runaway train in need of help. First time watching it I didn't notice the help sign that one of the passengers was holding.

All in all though, looks pretty sweet. Hope you post the pencil tests and the final up here.

 

[oliver_jones_37]

I liked it, good diea to not only do something cool, but to convey a sence of weight and gravity...which I know can be a *****!. Did you do all those walk cycles and the super girl being mugged? If so, very cool!

 

[Marvin]

thanks guys

i understand if u don't think u could help do to "laymaness" but the truth is that doesn't stop thousands of ppl from judging films (animated or otherwise) and sharing their opinion on how they could be better with others

i'm not asking for technicalities(tho i wouldn't mind) it's more about if it works for u, if it resonates, if it makes sense....plot holes, motivation, etc.

Thanks for the input WallCraw, i felt the same way about build up pacing, the problem is this is a Sheridan college Action Analysis assignment, which means exactly 30secs of story reel(boards) and within it 5 seconds of animation.
and as u can see at this stage i'm at 40 seconds. I've played around with different images and story points but the problem is to get every image to read i need aleast .30 secs to a 2seconds and i have about 35 drawings...
27 of which are essential in my opinion.

i may put the final up i'm not sure, keep in mind i won't be done for a few months
if you are interested i'll put it here when the time comes
http://kingmugabi.blogspot.com/

I also think it's a good idea, most of the stuff that comes out of this program is (understandably) simple and concise and redundant
no i didn't do the mugging one(s)
but yes some of it is mine
if ur interested in which ones, again check the blog.

peace

 

[WallCrawl]

Thanks for the input WallCrawl, i felt the same way about build up pacing, the problem is this is a Sheridan college Action Analysis assignment, which means exactly 30secs of story reel(boards) and within it 5 seconds of animation.
and as u can see at this stage i'm at 40 seconds. I've played around with different images and story points but the problem is to get every image to read i need aleast .30 secs to a 2seconds and i have about 35 drawings...
27 of which are essential in my opinion.

I think you just laid out the problem right there. In order to be effective, the story you've chosen needs to be longer than 40 seconds. It should probably be a minute to a minute and a half. Cramming it into a 35 second runtime does a disservice to the story since the climax suffers. If this were an actual 35 second short you were going to finish, I'd advise picking another idea that's more suitable to the amount of time allotted, but since it's just an assignment I guess you could just leave it.

 

[Marvin]

thanks for the advice, i've been getting that vibe from alot of ppl actually

i'm changing it now, the first and second act
with only 30secs to play with it should be much more focused

hopefully i'll be able to post that soon

 

[Marvin]

new version

[YT]C8Ug9yMs2OQ[/YT]

with explanation

http://kingmugabi.blogspot.com/2008/10/sisymetheanstxy.html

 

[wellsy]

Well, certainly, it looks good (and I love how the kid screams, and the music almost makes you think he's screaming).

I also like the Classical Greek mythological references in there (Styx, the chain, Prometheus, etc).

Really, I can't say much in the way of any flaws (that aren't being cruelly nitpicky) that are apparent to me in the video.

Good job (and I read the blog too).

 

[Marvin]

thanks man