Stupid People Doing Stupid Things Thread - Part 2

[Marvolo]

Sex Ed Teacher Cops to Banging Student in Teachers' Lounge

http://www.enidnews.com/news/waynok...al&utm_source=***********&utm_campaign=buffer

I guess she took sex ed really seriously. Seems like I've been reporting on tons of teachers banging their students as of late

I had the wrong sex ed teacher. My teacher only covered "theory" she didn't bother with the practice. Probably for the best. She...well she looked how I imagine Jim Belushis grandmother must have looked.

 

[KevanG]

I know of one sex ed teacher my sister had that refused to actually cover the material and basically tried to tell them that abstinence until marriage was the only solution. She was promptly removed from that position and they got someone who would actually do the proper job.

 

[TheDreamMaster]

I had the wrong sex ed teacher. My teacher only covered "theory" she didn't bother with the practice. Probably for the best. She...well she looked how I imagine Jim Belushis grandmother must have looked.

I had all the wrong teachers. Where were these teachers when I was in school?

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Fox News Host: Invasions like Iraq "Saved the Planet"

[YT]edzZ5mNv5z8[/YT]

Remember the planet before America started invading parts of it? God, what a craphole. Just a total mess. Since then, though: pretty much perfect, right? That's the improbable assessment Fox News' Charles Payne delivered on Sunday while discussing criticism of American Sniper.

"It's a pretty simple thing, you watch the movie, he saved American lives," said Payne of Navy SEAL Chris Kyle. "And he went through a tough struggle to do it, but it was a job that had to be done." A mostly empty if not unfamiliar sentiment about the war in Iraq. Payne, however, was just getting started:

Look at the death toll that we had protecting people in a different country because that's what America does. We've been the world's policeman, and guess what's happened over the time we've become the world's policeman?

A billion people in other countries have moved into the middle class. We had India on TV earlier. If it wasn't for Americans dying around the world, the rest of the world would be in abject poverty.

"We have saved the planet," concluded Payne, "and if we go away as [the world's] policeman, it's going to be hell to pay for everyone."

In most places—including the opinion page of The Wall Street Journal—America's role as "the world's policeman" is treated as a question, but to the Fox Business host, it's just a neat fact. In case you were having trouble keeping track, here are all the accomplishments Payne attributes to American interventionism:

- A billion people moving into the middle class

- India being on TV

- The rest of the world staying out of (?) abject poverty

- The planet's salvation

"So, true," agreed co-host Anna Kooiman.

What a delusional moron

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Twitter Troll Grounds Two Planes with Bomb Threat

On Saturday, CNN reported that two passenger planes had been escorted by fighter jet to Atlanta's Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport to be searched, the result of an online bomb threat military officials "deemed credible." It soon became clear, however, the threat came from a source most of us would treat pretty skeptically: some dumb tweets from an obvious troll.

As BuzzFeed, The Verge and others reported, the threat was apparently made by the Twitter account @kingZortic, which, by playing coy, got Delta Airlines to flesh out a key detail about the supposed bomb.

At 6 p.m., an FBI representative announced that bomb squads and canine units were unable to find anything suspicious on either plane. "We haven't found anything at this point," Special Britt Johnson told reporters. "Nothing's been found."

Shortly afterward, the airport announced normal operations had resumed.

Of course, in an age where murderers sometimes brag about their crimes on social media, taking online threats seriously makes a degree of sense. But that doesn't make it any less depressing when NORAD scrambles F-16s over terrorists like this:

http://www.cnn.com/2015/01/24/us/atlanta-bomb-threat/index.html

I understand the need for safety but how was that deemed a credible threat?

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Dish Network Violated the 'Do Not Call' Registry 57 Million Times

Dish Network, it seems, has been rather partial to telemarketing. A little too partial. The TV provider has been found guilty of violating the Federal Trade Commission's "Do Not Call" list a staggering 57 million times.

The final ruling on a complaint lodged way back in 2009, the District Court for the Central District of Illinois also found Dish culpable for abandoning or causing telemarketers to abandon nearly 50 million outbound telephone calls. Those calls are cases where a call was "not transferred to a live sales agent within two seconds of the recipient's completed greeting"—in others, mis-management leading to telephone spam.

The ruling includes some pretty horrible examples of it affecting everyday folks, including one night worker who couldn't turn her phone off during the day because of her husband's medical condition:

"After getting repeated calls about Dish service, she took steps to put an end to the annoyance. She listened to the whole recorded sale pitch, hoping a live person would pick up so she could beg them to stop calling. When she finally got somebody on the line, she told them to put her on their Do Not Call list. She started sleeping on the couch with pencil and paper in hand so she could document the calls when they woke her up. Ultimately, she filed two complaints with her State Attorney General. Dish responded that she probably already was on the company's entity-specific Do Not Call list, but she would be added 'in an abundance of caution.' But despite all that, the calls kept coming – and according to the government's motion, she was never put on the entity-specific list."

Perhaps the worst news for Dish, though, is the FCC penalty for infringing the Do Not Call list. It can be up to $16,000 for each outbound call. Ouch.

http://www.examiner.com/article/dis...network-call-you-up-you-and-57-million-others

I hope they get fined for each call. I know from personal experience in the telemarketing game that those companies do not care about the do not call list

 

[Teelie]

So all those fraudulent calls I got from Dish Network weren't so fraudulent afterall. Just illegal.

 

[KevanG]

Fox News Host: Invasions like Iraq "Saved the Planet"

[YT]edzZ5mNv5z8[/YT]



What a delusional moron

It's Fox. I can't even make myself watch the network. They've been garbage for years and if not for the billionaire financing them they probably would have gone under years ago.

 

[Marvolo]

Fox News Host: Invasions like Iraq "Saved the Planet"

[YT]edzZ5mNv5z8[/YT]



What a delusional moron

Sad thing is that a majority of their audience likely believe this nonsense.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Burger King Screws Up Woman's Order, Hands Her $2,600 at Drive-Thru

Ugh, Burger King messed up a New Hampshire woman's order again this week, putting a $2,631 cash drop in her bag instead of the Spicy Crispy Chicken Jr. and sweet tea she asked for.

Janelle Jones first noticed the mistake—which is just so typical—when she was driving home and saw there was no food in her bag, just a couple bank deposit bags and a $100 bill.

And no, Jones didn't try to keep the money. From the Associated Press:

[Husband] Matthew Jones says the couple briefly considered keeping the money, which they certainly could have used. But he says he and his wife are Jehovah's Witnesses, and that "Jehovah sees everything."

After she returned the cash, the store's manager offered Jones five free meals, which, with her luck, will probably all be stupid diamonds or something.

http://www.fosters.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20150124/GJNEWS_01/150129575

Why are they putting there deposits in food bags?

 

[Asgard]

Look at how this lady handles this stupid reporter and his inane questions.

http://www.myfoxmemphis.com/clip/11...y-after-letting-drug-dealer-in#at_pco=cfd-1.0

 

[KevanG]

A One Direction video proves the Illuminati have taken over the world.

[YT]48tdL3Assn0[/YT]

Man, I don't know what the ****. This hurts my brain. A couch represents the red horse of War of the four horsemen of the Apocalypse. Danny is the antichrist due to 3 non-consecutive sixes on his license plate. He's just so ****ing serious talking about how sumo wrestlers, masked ballet dancers and monkeys.

 

[Duran Man]

Burger King Screws Up Woman's Order, Hands Her $2,600 at Drive-Thru

http://www.fosters.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20150124/GJNEWS_01/150129575

Why are they putting there deposits in food bags?

It was probably meant for someone else, someone with nefarious dealings with one of the employees.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

CIA Officer Guilty of Espionage for Leaking Classified Docs to Reporter

A former CIA officer who leaked classified documents to a New York Times reporter was convicted of espionage today in federal court and could potentially face decades in jail.

Jeffrey Sterling, who was fired from the CIA in 2002, had a contentious relationship with the agency, at one point unsuccessfully suing for racial discrimination. Not long after, prosecutors said, he began leaking information to Times reporter James Risen.

He was eventually indicted in 2011 after Risen published information about a failed CIA plan to sabotage Iran's nuclear program by giving the country "intentionally flawed nuclear component schematics," in a 2006 novel, State of War.

The court was prepared to compel Risen to testify against Sterling, but prosecutors ultimately declined to call him to the stand, relying instead on circumstantial evidence.

Via the Times:

The trial was part Washington spectacle, part cloak and dagger. Former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice testified, as did C.I.A. operatives who gave only their first names and last initials, with their faces shielded behind seven-foot-high partitions. A scientist was referred to only by his code name, Merlin. His wife was Mrs. Merlin.

He'll be sentenced in April.

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/27/u...ffrey-sterling-is-convicted-of-espionage.html

How are you going to go to work for the CIA and then leak weak stuff about Iran?

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Porn Star on Drake's Thirsty DMs: "The Whole Thing Was Cringeworthy"

Drake is the gooberest cool rapper on Earth, and the following story will only further cement his goober legend. Last night, in an interview with a Miami sports radio station, Mia Khalifa—the number one ranked porn star on Pornhub—told a story about someone who is almost definitely Drake sliding into her Instagram DMs, to send her a series of enthusiastic messages she described as "so cringeworthy."

Khalifa was asked by host Brian Papa which celebrity men had personally contacted her since her sudden rise to fame. After initially demurring, Khalifa said that she was hit up by a famous man whose name... rhymes with "rake." She then begins to cackle before gathering herself to say that the "rake" man's DMs were "so cringeworthy." "The whole thing was cringeworthy," she reiterates.

Papa then jokes that the man they both non-verbally agree is Drake probably sent Khalifa a photo of himself "lying on the bed, shirtless, kinda sad looking"—a cutting Drake caricature if there ever was one—to which she responds, in between laughter, that the radio host is "halfway there."

So, which man whose name rhymes with "rake" tried to bang Mia Khalifa via Instagram DM? Could it be Blake Shelton? Maybe Jake Gyllenhaal?

Long live the Goober Prince.

http://mancave.cbslocal.com/2015/01/26/drake-sends-message-to-mia-khalifa-porn-star/

I'm a big fan of Mia's work t:

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Remember the Lady With 3 Breasts?

A Tampa woman who made headlines after claiming she had a third breast implanted last year has been arrested for driving under the influence.

21-year-old Alisha Jasmine Hessler, aka Jasmine Tridevil, was arrested early Monday morning in Tampa, on one count of DUI.

Hessler became an Internet sensation last September, when she told media outlets she had a third breast implanted to become "unattractive," and that she hoped to land a reality show on MTV.

10 News even spoke with her in an exclusive interview.

However, her dubious claims were quickly exposed as a fake, after 10 News found a Tampa International Airport incident report Hessler filed, where she claimed her prosthetic fake breasts had been stolen with her luggage.

Her stolen property was later recovered.

There's no word on if Hessler ever did land that reality show.

http://www.wtsp.com/story/news/weird/2015/01/26/three-breasted-woman-dui-arrest/22343461/

God I love Tampa Bay haha

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Emile Hirsch Allegedly Put a Female Film Exec In a Headlock at Sundance

Page Six reports that an incident involving Emile Hirsch is under investigation after the actor allegedly assaulted Paramount exec Dani Bernfeld at Park City's Tao Nightclub early Sunday morning.

The alleged attack, first reported Sunday, reportedly occurred around 3:30 a.m. during the Sundance Film Festival, when an anonymous source tells Page Six he or she saw Hirsch "aggressively picking on Dani." The source continues:

"He got even more aggressive and aggro. He pushed Dani up against a table, and then he put her in a headlock."

Another source claims that Hirsch "attacked her from behind" and put her in a "chokehold."

"He completely blindsided her after he'd been s***-talking and was already led away from her once."

According to an earlier report, no arrests were made that night, though police were called and spoke to Hirsch before sending him home.

Park City police confirmed to Page Six that they are investigating the incident. As of Tuesday, no charges had been filed.

http://pagesix.com/2015/01/27/emile-hirsch-had-female-film-exec-in-headlock/

What a scumbag, I'm sure Elisha Cuthbert would not approve

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Stanford Swimmer Raped Unconscious Woman in Public

A Stanford University swimmer was caught raping a drunk, unconscious woman near a fraternity house earlier this month, Santa Clara county prosecutors say.

According to reports, 19-year-old Brock Allen Turner was arrested early Jan. 18 when two students riding bikes across campus spotted him on top of an unconscious woman. They tackled him to the ground while another student called authorities, the LA Times reports.

Turner—who swam in the 2012 Olympic trials and was reportedly heavily recruited by Stanford—was released after posting a $150,000 bail.

This week, he voluntarily withdrew from the university, which barred him from reentering the school's campus. The school also reportedly deleted his profile from the swim team's website.

On Wednesday, prosecutors are expected formally charge him with five felonies, including rape and sexual assault with a foreign object.

http://www.latimes.com/local/lanow/...urce=dlvr.it&utm_medium=twitter&dlvrit=649324

Disgusting, this jerk should do time for this but I'm sure his parents will buy his way out of it. They already posted $150k in bail money

 

[KevanG]

**** that guy. He needs a hell of a beating daily until he understands that is wrong.

Emile Hirsch Allegedly Put a Female Film Exec In a Headlock at Sundance

http://pagesix.com/2015/01/27/emile-hirsch-had-female-film-exec-in-headlock/

What a scumbag, I'm sure Elisha Cuthbert would not approve

I'd be pissed if someone put me in a headlock. Definitely call the cops on that.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Facebook Went Down, FIVE People Called 911

Facebook went down for a little bit on Monday, which for most people was a slight inconvenience. Others, however, lost their **** a little.

CBS San Francisco report that shortly after the service stopped working, not one, not two, but FIVE PEOPLE called 911.

"Our lines are [sic] dedicated to handle life and death calls, and even though Facebook is important to a lot of people, it's not a matter of life and death when it stops working," a dispatcher told CBS (via Boing Boing). "One caller even called back to tell me I was being rude because I told her it wasn't a life threatening emergency."

Hey, morons: emergency lines are for emergencies, not your whining.

http://sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com/20...calling-911-when-facebook-goes-down-claycord/

There goes 5 of the stupidest people to ever walk this green Earth

 

[KevanG]

I have around 30 people on FB. I mostly use it to talk to a friend and my sister. I almost never post anything and really don't care what people post, for the most part anyway. I honestly don't see what the big ****ing deal about it is.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

I have over 1,000 friends on there and use it mostly to kill time at work. I don't post anywhere near as much as I used to. Just the occasional quip here and there. I do like being able to keep in touch with old friends easily though

 

[KevanG]

How many of those friends have you talked to personally in the past year?

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

How many of those friends have you talked to personally in the past year?

Well you have to remember I'm a DJ Kev, a lot of those people are either fans of my music or people in the music scene I want to stay up with. One thing though, I always thought I screwed up doing that profile under my real name and not my DJ name but now they are making everyone with fake names use their real names so I win! haha

 

[KevanG]

I'm just messing with you. I know people who have 2000 friends and know maybe 30 of them and have talked to maybe 10 of them.