Stupid People Doing Stupid Things Thread - Part 3

[KevanG]

This is going to have to be renamed the Trump is an idiot thread since he's running for president.

10 Stupid Things Trump Said During His Announcement Speech.

When Mexico sends its people, they’re not sending their best. They’re sending people that have lots of problems. They’re bringing drugs. They’re bringing crime. They’re rapists.

Some of the candidates, they went in and didn’t know the air conditioner didn’t work and sweated like dogs, and they didn’t know the room was too big because they didn’t have anybody there. How are they going to beat ISIS?

We have a 5 billion dollar website. I have so many websites … I hire people. They do a website. It costs me three dollars.

When was the last time anybody saw us beating, let’s say, China in a trade deal? They kill us. I beat China all the time.

I will be the greatest jobs president that God ever created.

I will build a great wall — and nobody builds walls better than me, believe me —and I’ll build them very inexpensively. I will build a great, great wall on our southern border, and I will make Mexico pay for that wall. Mark my words.

They built a hotel. When I build a hotel, I have to pay interest. They don’t have to pay interest because they took the oil when we left Iraq, I said we should have taken. So now ISIS has the oil.

I watch the speeches of these people, and they say the sun will rise, the moon will set, all sorts of wonderful things will happen, and people are saying, ‘What is going on? I just want a job.’

Free trade is terrible. Free trade can be wonderful if you have smart people. But we have stupid people.

And finally is most compelling reason on why he needs to be president:

We need a leader that wrote The Art of the Deal.

Watch the whole thing here if you dare.

[YT]q_q61B-DyPk[/YT]

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

UPDATE: Conrad Hilton Is the Luckiest Idiot on the Planet

Conrad Hilton, a barred-out air terrorist with a famous last name, was looking at 20 years in prison after an insane 11-hour meltdown on an international flight last summer. So will he be serving 20 years in prison? Hell no!

Hilton was arrested last July after spending the entire British Airways flight from London to Los Angeles acting like a trust fund madman.

According to witnesses, the petite prince stalked up and down the airplane aisles, ranted that passengers wanted to “f*** or fight him,” accused flight attendants of “taking the peasants’ side,” and attempted to punch one male crew member, missing him by “about ten centimeters.”

He also reportedly smoked weed in the bathroom and extended an invitation to one of the pilots to fight him, which was respectfully declined.

One thing that did not bother him at all? His pending arrest.

“I could get you all fired in five minutes,” he reportedly said. “I know your boss! My father will pay this out. He has done it before. Dad paid $300k last time.”​

All in all, his crimes amounted to a potential 20 year sentence in a federal prison, which obviously he will not be serving. Guess the lil Hilton was right after all.

Conrad Hilton has been sentenced to three years probation and ordered to undertake 750 hours of community service after pleading guilty to disrupting a flight last July.

The 21-year-old was also ordered to pay a $5,000 fine and have mental health and substance abuse treatment at a hearing on Monday after previously pleading guilty to a misdemeanor count or simple assault.​

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbi...ice-disrupting-London-Los-Angeles-flight.html

Money may not be able to buy you happiness but it sure seems to be able to keep your ass from going to prison

 

[Marvolo]

A $5000 fine....for acting like a maniac on a plane.

Meanwhile a 15 year old involved in the Baltimore riot from a family below the poverty line received a $500,000 bail for busting out a single window in a single cop car.

Ahhhh justice.

 

[KevanG]

UPDATE: Conrad Hilton Is the Luckiest Idiot on the Planet

Money may not be able to buy you happiness but it sure seems to be able to keep your ass from going to prison

750 hours of community service which he probably won't have to do, a $5,000 fine which is nothing and an assement that he probably won'r have to do either. If he wasn't rich he'd have been in prison for the past few months with a bail amount near a million if he could even get one.

And they say Americas justice system is useless.

 

[TheDreamMaster]

Texas says bring on the deep fryers and soda in schools

So basically they're ditching health regulations so they can save money in the short term. Very nice for the children who are supposed to be the main concern.

As someone who is fat and trying to work on getting my health back in order....what the **** Texas?

 

[KevanG]

We should just call this the T&T thread, Texas and Trump.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

750 hours of community service which he probably won't have to do, a $5,000 fine which is nothing and an assement that he probably won'r have to do either. If he wasn't rich he'd have been in prison for the past few months with a bail amount near a million if he could even get one.

And they say Americas justice system is useless.

That's why they gave him so much community service, you can pay to get rid of it at $20 an hour. That's nothing for the Hiltons

 

[KevanG]

So they have to pay maybe $20,000? FFS.

 

[TheDreamMaster]

So did anyone read the recent Cracked/com article on the person who went undercover trying to uncover child pornography rings? I can't link due to language, but even given Cracked trying to lighten things a little, it literally made me cry. Those are some incredibly disturbed people.

Not exactly the stupid people of this thread, but we don't have a generally horrible people thread, so...

 

[Teelie]

I read that this morning. Truly disturbing.

 

[KevanG]

Comcast forces people to sign NDAs to get refund of their own money.

When John and Carol Lehman tried to get a $600 refund from Comcast for payments on a cable box they say they gave back to the company five years ago, Comcast offered them the money on one condition: sign a non-disclosure agreement.

The NDA might seem like a good tactic for avoiding the kind of bad press that has long plagued Comcast, but it didn't work—the NDA was apparently given to the customers after they had already gone to the media. 6ABC Action News in Philadelphia had the story this week. The news spot played a recording of a Comcast representative telling the Lehmans, "we will issue a $600 even credit, pending that you sign a non-disclosure agreement."

Read the entire NDA at the link. Having worked at Bell Canada for years I am not surprised at them doing this then saying "oops, we didn't mean to do that." once the news started calling with questions.

I'd love to see any company try to do that to a family member of mine. My uncle worked for Rogers and was fairly high up in the Cell Division, my Aunt is a techno geek and my parents both did legal work for the Canadian government before they retired. It would be so much fun.

 

[redmarvel]

A few weeks ago in another thread, I made a joke about how all Canadians are considered the nicest people.....and a Canadian poster chewed me out for perpetuating that myth......so if you go up there, don't tell them why because they may kick you out......but they may also give you a nice going away gift basket.

Naah, we don't kick anyone out. We drive 'em away by paying less wages than they can get in the U.S. and charging 'em more at the stores.

(You wouldn't believe how much stuff we buy on-line from the States and have shipped to Canada cause even with border tax and tariffs it's still cheaper than trying to buy it here.)

Sorry, my own personal rant.

 

[KevanG]

North Korea is just the greatest science country ever!

They’ve made miniature nuclear warheads, are in the midst of a baby boom of triplets, and now they’ve managed to cure AIDS — or so North Korea claims. And why stop there? According to the official Korean Central News Agency, their new drug also cures MERS, Ebola, and SARS.

Apparently, they’ve had the drug — called Kumdang-2 — for the past 23 years, but somehow failed to tell the rest of us. Well, thankfully for us all, they’re now imparting their knowledge and even giving us the chance to buy it ourselves. If you’re lucky enough to be living in Europe, you can get your hands on it from an official distributor in Russia for the not unreasonable price of $27.79 (£17.50).

According to the website set up for the drug, scientists in the authoritarian state have developed the drug from ginseng grown in “rare-earth molecular fertilizer,” and it contains “micro-quantities of gold and platinum.” It works as an anti-inflammatory, anti-bacterial, and anti-virus, absorbing and removing anything that has “not originally been in the human body.” Not only that, but apparently it also cures addiction. Can this wonder drug get any better?!

As I’m sure I don’t need to remind you, this isn’t the first time North Korea has made outlandish claims. In 2006, they made a similar announcement about the same drug during both the 2006 and 2013 outbreaks of bird flu. It’s just a shame that North Korea can't also develop a drug that combats the tuberculosis that’s apparently rife in the country. Oh wait, that already exists.

Who else wants to move there to experience their wonderful and advanced health care?

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

All hail the supreme leader!

 

[KevanG]

Who else loves weddings as much as these people?

As per the police report

The wedding night fight at the Blue Falls Grove venue started when a guest noticed that the 14-year-old was drunk. The woman scolded the boy’s mom for letting the teen guzzle beer at the reception.

“The mother responded with a punch to that woman’s face,” [Northern Berks Regional Police Chief Scott] Eaken said.

As the two women started to brawl, a third wedding guest tried to break up the fight — but the dueling women punched him and broke his glasses, police said.

By the time cops arrived, there were drunken “fights everywhere,” Eaken said.

“We went there with the intent of telling everyone to leave and go home, but that unfortunately didn’t happen,” Eaken said.

Instead, the groom challenged the cops to a duel.

The man, Brian R. Pelker, 46, of the 400 block of Hill Road, South Heidelberg Township, refused to get out of the way, yelled at officers and took on a fighting stance. After warning him to get out of the way. Barrow used a stun gun on him to no effect. He tried to use the stun gun again but Pelker only got more aggressive, so Barrow took him down with a baton.

Once on the ground, Pelker struggled with officers and grabbed one of them in the crotch before he was subdued.

And they say the sanctity of marriage is facing a crisis.

 

[KevanG]

Gay marriage opposers threaten to move to Canada to get away from Gay Marriage which just celebrated a decade of legal gay marriage.

The SCOTUS ruling upset right-wingers across the Internet today, and in the immediate wake of the ruling, many of them partook in a the fine American tradition of threatening to leave the country on social media.

But where would they go? You would assume a country like Iran, Afghanistan, Saudi Arabia, or Uganda would be to their liking. But, incredibly, no. Instead, to escape marriage equality, these bigots threatened to flood America’s northern border — and move to Canada.

Please don't.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Brilliant

 

[Asgard]

Teacher in Florida gets 22 years for having sex with three students.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/jennifer-fichter-florida-teacher-sex-article-1.2280215

Good riddance. The woman has a long history of preying on children.

 

[Teelie]

Man mocks alligators, jumps in water and is killed in Texas

This is almost certainly a lock in for a Darwin Award.

A man who apparently mocked alligators, then jumped in the water -- despite warning signs -- is dead after being attacked in Texas.

Orange County Police were called to Burkart's Marina near the Louisiana state line early Friday morning after reports that Tommie Woodward, 28, and an unidentified woman were swimming in a bayou and had been attacked by a large alligator.

Woodward's body was found several hours later. The woman was not injured.

Orange County Justice of the Peace Rodney Price told CNN affiliate KFDM that Woodward ignored verbal warnings and a posted "No Swimming Alligators" sign and seemed to mock the deadly creatures before going in the water.

"He removed his shirt, removed his billfold ... someone shouted a warning and he said 'blank the alligators' and jumped in to the water and almost immediately yelled for help," Price said.

The "No Swimming Alligators" sign was posted this week after a 10-foot alligator was spotted in the bayou waters.

Witness heard 'An alligator's got him'

"Please do not go swimming, there's a bigger alligator out here. Just please stay out of the water," witness and marina employee Michelle Wright said she told Woodward.

She said the next thing she heard was the woman screaming, "An alligator's got him." Wright said she used a flashlight in the darkness to scan the water.

In an emotional interview with KFDM, Wright said, "I saw his body floating face down. And then he's out there for a couple of seconds and then he's dragged back down. And then he comes back up still face down and then he gets pulled down again. And then he just disappears."

Wright, who said she knew the victim and his family, said it was a moment she would never forget. She described the events that started out as a late night swim as "heartbreaking."

Woodward had recently moved to the area from St. Louis with his twin brother and was working at a nearby shipyard.

'If the sun is down, stay out of the water'

Alligators are predatory and territorial. According to Texas Parks and Wildlife, the creature "will eat anything it can catch," and should be treated with caution.

"If the sun is down, stay out the water. That's when they're eating. That's when they're hunting," alligator expert Arlie Hammonds told the affiliate.

Although there have been numerous fatal alligator attacks in Florida, the Orange County attack may be the first of its kind in Texas.

CNN

 

[KevanG]

Well it's his own ****ing fault. I hope they don't try and kill the gators over this. If they had come out and ran after people, sure, but this moron basically covered himself in BBQ sauce and rang a dinner bell.

 

[Teelie]

There should be no punishment or attempt to capture the gator(s) responsible since this was a clear case of provocation. It is like you said, chumming the waters then jumping in.

 

[Marvolo]

Man Dies Instantly After Setting Off A Firework From His Head

22-year-old Maine man who was drinking and celebrating the Fourth of July with friends is dead after he set off a fireworks mortar from his head.

Devon Staples was in a friend's backyard in the eastern Maine city of Calais, near the Canadian border, when he placed a fireworks mortar on his head and set it off, Maine State Police told the Portland Press Herald.

The explosion caused a head injury that killed Staples instantly.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/07/05/devon-staples-firework_n_7731128.html?utm_hp_ref=tw

Dumbass. Too bad his friends were either too drunk or dumb or too worthless to stop him.

 

[Victarion]

Blank the alligators.

 

[KevanG]

Should the last two be considered suicide?

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Hopefully the fireworks guy was not able to procreate