Talking to girls online

...I have arms, freak.

But there's this thing she does with a tablespoon...

How the heck did A-Man win creepiest poster, and not kaine?
I first thought this was about men posing as girls, and the risks of it.
But seeing that first post, I usually think it would be the other way around. If I was talking to a girl and she asked to meet, I would be interested, but nervous all at once.
So... 'tis a tricky business talking to girls. It's like, one word wrong, and all of a sudden you're too "pushy". Whatever that means. "Just date me already or I'll beat the **** out of you". How's that for pushy? I have this vision of girls who say they've been "creeped" out by something you said going back home, and hugging themselves naked in the corner, crying, like they've been raped or something. Grow some balls, women.

So anyway. I've been talking to this girl online for a good 2 months or so. That clearly means she digs me. We send messages back and forth on this website and ****. So I'm thinking, when the **** can we meet up already. But girls are weirdos, right? I mean, bat**** insane. If you asked the question "when can we meet up" her female bull**** kicks in and she thinks "he's too pushy - NEVER GONNA TALK TO HIM AGAIN!". Or, "but I only ever thought of him as a friend", as though somehow they didn't recognise that you have a penis.

So I thought I'd post a message or two of hers and you guys could tell me what you think, plus I'd post my latest response.

My response...

Yeah thats right, she knows I'm into comic books! When I briefly brought it up at first, she responded by saying how she liked Batman Begins. So there.

The part I put in bold is the key. "we should have a dvd night" could be falsely interpreted by the female mind as "he wants me at his house?? ewww how creepy! he wants to sex me straight away", when I simply like the idea of having a dvd night.

p.s This post is about 80% satire. Its so I don't look so loserish asking for advice on how to talk to girls ONLINE, asking on a messageboard of all things.

no, you don't sound like some weird obsessed internet guy right now at all.
Passing on of "the" spoon and the possible on line chat.
Whoa, you've gotten fiesty. I like it.

How are things, Tzar?
I'm fighting sleep.
Did you go to the Cake show?
Actually even being friendly can freak a girl out, thanks to all the *******s and jerks in this world, the decent guys always get pushed away in fear of being treated the same way. In a sense, you can't really blame them for being a little paranoid. I know i'm paranoid at times, in fear of meeting the same ****ty and dishonest girl again.

But of course, if a girl is talking to someone online, that's always reason to be cautious, because it's a little hard to trust words on a screen, imo.

But if she's just toying with you, saying "oh I wanna meet you" and "oh youre so cool!" yet whenever you respond to that she reacts like you've just murdered her entire family, then yes...somethings wrong.

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