The Dark Knight Caption Thread!

[Miranda Fox]

I know its ten pages later, but that's funny.

You did good ones Miranda Fox.

CRANE: "U2!"
BATMAN: "Queen!"
CRANE: "U2!"
BATMAN: "Queen!"

Heh, praise from Dr Fate! It doesn't get any better than that.

Seriously though, you cannot go wrong with Monty Python for a caption. Ever.

 

[Lunar_Wolf]

JIM: I have some terrible news Batman.
BATMAN: What is it Jim?
JIM: They're not selling cheese with the cracker sticks anymore...oh and Robin is dead.
BATMAN: You lie Jim, you lie!!!
JIM: I swear it to be true, they say no one is eating the cheese.
BATMAN: I'm talking about Robin, what happened?
JIM: Oh, it's the Joker, he left a bannna peel on the floor and the poor critter slipped.
BATMAN: Joker will pay for this!!!

JOKER: BATMAN!!!!
BATMAN: You killed Robin and for that you shall die.
JOKER: Killing me won't bring Robin back.
BATMAN: Too bad!!!

*fires 20 rounds*

 

[Morgoth]

JIM: I have some terrible news Batman.
BATMAN: What is it Jim?
JIM: They're not selling cheese with the cracker sticks anymore...oh and Robin is dead.
BATMAN: You lie Jim, you lie!!!
JIM: I swear it to be true, they say no one is eating the cheese.
BATMAN: I'm talking about Robin, what happened?
JIM: Oh, it's the Joker, he left a bannna peel on the floor and the poor critter slipped.
BATMAN: Joker will pay for this!!!

JOKER: BATMAN!!!!
BATMAN: You killed Robin and for that you shall die.
JOKER: Killing me won't bring Robin back.
BATMAN: Too bad!!!

*fires 20 rounds*

heh heh. t:

 

[Lunar_Wolf]

JIM: Did you hear that CW is making a tv show about you?
BATMAN: Are you serious?
JIM: Yeah, it's on at 8pm tonight.
BATMAN: I wonder how they will protray me?
JIM: And me.

later that night.

BATMAN: Good idea ol chum, The Joker must be behind the old cream factory explosion!
ROBIN: Gee whiz Batman, this is worst then the time The Riddle gave you the ever lasting riddle.

The next night

BATMAN: WTF is a gee whiz?

 

[ultimatefan]

BATMAN: Hmm, apparently The Joker has crippled comissioner Gordon´s daughter, Barbara, took pictures of her bleeding naked body, than kidnapped the comissioner, took him to an abandoned park ride, took his clothes off and exposed him to the pictures as he sang a dark and sardonic song.
ROBIN: Holy deranged psychopath, Batman!
BATMAN: Indeed, ol chum!


(if you think about it, there´s a bit of a reference there too, the hint is: a recent cartoon makes fun of an old cartoon)

 

[titan101]

I hope there IS a reference, otherwise you're a very odd-minded individual.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smXBVbuJUOw&search=word around the office

 

[Batman*]

Not exactly a one picture caption but

Part 1

IN HIS STUDY, ORPHAN BRUCE WAYNE CONTENPLATES HIS DISGUISE FOR CRIME FIGHTING...

"Criminals are a superstitious and cowardly lot, so my disguise must be able to strike terror into their hearts!"

AS IF IN ANSWER, BRUCE'S FUTURE DISGUISE WALKS BY THE OPEN WINDOW

"A male stripper? OMEN!"

ON HIS FIRST NIGHT OF CRIMEFIGHTING BRUCE DECIDES TO PAY COMMISSIONER GORDON A VISIT IN HIS NEWLY FOUND DISGUISE

"Grab a plate, commissioner! this MAN-BUFFET is OPEN!"

"ARG! BURNED INTO RETINAS FOREVER! MUST... COUNTERACT WITH SMOKING!"

STRIPPER-MAN IS MET WITH MIXED REVIEWS, BACK IN HIS STUDY BRUCE CONTENPLATES ANOTHER DISGUISE!

"I can't believe Gordan burned me with his cigarette like that! perhaps if I hadn't jumped in his lap....."

FATE STRIKES AGAIN!, AS THROUGH BRUCE'S WINDOW WALKS.....

"Evening Bruce"

"Commissioner?, Its an omen! I shall become......Gordon-Man!

TO BE CONTINUED

 

[Batman*]

Part 2

GORDON-MAN IS A HIT !

"Gordon-Man, you are one handsome devil!, but I'd rethink fighting crime! you're far to handsome to be safe from jealous thugs!, have you considered Male-Stripping?

THAT NIGHT OUTSIDE BRUCE WAYNE'S STUDY...

"A crook!, what a nuisance!"

"This is a STICK-UP, buddy! I'll take those pearls!"

"An OMEN!, I shall become a MUGGER!. No, wait. I shall become A WOMAN BEING MUGGED FOR HER PEARLS!. No, wait. I shall become A SOBBING ORPHAN BOY!"

OVER THE MONTHS GOTHAM CITY IS GREETED TO "JEHOVAS WITNESS-MAN","TWO SQUIRELLS-MAN", "MOON-MAN" AND "CURTAINS-MAN!".

EVENTUALLY, BRUCE VOWS TO PETITION THE GOTHAM CITY ZONING BOARD TO DIVERT THE WALKING PATH RUNNING THROUGH HIS BACK YARD.

"I am going to cement this goddamn window!"

SUDDENLY, VIGILANTE LEGEND BATMAN APPEARS!

"CITIZEN!"

"What the swiss?"

TO BE CONTINUED

 

[Batman*]

Part 3

"Good evening, citizen! could I borrow your phone?"

"That is one SWANK-LOOKING COSTUME!"

"So dapper! sporty, yet SUMPTUOUS!"

"Citizen?"

"The muted tones say "BUSINESS UP FRONT!" but the cape screams "PARTY IN THE BACK!"

"Hello?"

BRUCE THINKS FAST!

"I'll take those pearls buddy!"

TO BE CONTINUED

 

[Batman*]

Part 4

"What? I--"

SLASH!

"...Only wanted...To use phone...Car on fire...People trapped"

"Thats nothing! I'll set the whole WORLD on fire with THIS costume!"

"Wait. Not MY car, right? It's okay?"

"kaff...Urkkk..."

"Don't make me go look for it myself!"

TO BE CONTINUED

 

[Batman*]

Part 5

THE NEXT DAY BRUCE DISCOVERES THAT HIS PARENTS SURVIVED

"I look like a million bucks over here!"

HE DOESN'T CARE!

 

[Dr. Fate]

Funny stuff all of that Batman*.

BATMAN: "Can't bend my knees in this thing..."

 

[Batman*]

Thanks, Dr Fate

"It looks as if you have a minor concussion, come back in one week."

"Three years old, you're a big boy now Bruce"

"You can't win Cash, I'm staring champion of Gotham"

 

[Dr. Fate]

Staring champion of Gotham... nyehehehe.

BATMAN: "Hello, is your refrigerator running?"

JOKER: "Yeah."

BATMAN: "Then it probably runs like you - homosexually." [hangs up]

JOKER: "Son of a b@#$!"

 

[Miranda Fox]

Batman: So, your new info said this guy wears purple, right?
Gordon: Yes.
Batman: And he likes theatrics?
Gordon: Yes.
Batman: Dude, I totally figured out who this is...

Gordon: You're a dumbass.

Halle: I'm Catwoman!

Michelle: Girl, please!

 

[LadyMoira]

Barbara-"Noooooo!"

Batman and Robin-"What is it Batgirl?"

Batgirl-"I just saw a publicity photo for the new movie about us..."

Batman-Batgirl-Robin-"Nooooo!"

 

[Dr. Fate]

Batman: So, you're new info said this guy wears purple, right?
Gordon: Yes.
Batman: And he likes theatrics?
Gordon: Yes.
Batman: Dude, I totally figured out who this is...

Gordon: You're a dumbass.

Halle: I'm Catwoman!

Michelle: Girl, please!

Bwahahaha

Yours was funny too Lady Moira.

SELINA: "I'm not the chick from Bound!"

DUCARD: "Dude, she is so the chick from Bound..."
BRUCE: "Ah Bound... so many fond memories of that film..."

 

[Lunar_Wolf]

ROBIN: Oh ****, you bastard Bruce, I have no where to land, you've taken all the room on the ledge, help...HELP!! WHY WON'T YOU HELP???

BATMAN: Because I'm Batman?

 

[Dr. Fate]

ROBIN: Oh ****, you bastard Bruce, I have no where to land, you've taken all the room on the ledge, help...HELP!! WHY WON'T YOU HELP???

BATMAN: Because I'm Batman?

Hahaha.

CATWOMAN: "If I didn't have revealing cuts around my ass and my legs I'd be dying of skin suffocation right now."

 

[Lunar_Wolf]

ROBIN: It's kinda cold in here, I'll up the thermostat.

NIGHTWING: Don't touch the termostat, you know how Batman gets.
ROBIN: Aw come'on this thing goes up to 90.
*turns termostat*

*batman bursts in the door*
BATMAN: Who touched the termostat?
ROBIN: How does he always know?
BATMAN: Brain inplant Robin, every superhero has one, tells us when the sidekicks are messing with the termstat.

SUPERMAN: Hey Batman my thing went off, your termostat ok?
BATMAN: Yeah it's alright.

HAWKMAN: Hey is everything ok?
SUPERMAN: Yeah false alarm.

 

[Hotwire]

ROBIN: It's kinda cold in here, I'll up the thermostat.

NIGHTWING: Don't touch the termostat, you know how Batman gets.
ROBIN: Aw come'on this thing goes up to 90.
*turns termostat*

*batman bursts in the door*
BATMAN: Who touched the termostat?
ROBIN: How does he always know?
BATMAN: Brain inplant Robin, every superhero has one, tells us when the sidekicks are messing with the termstat.

SUPERMAN: Hey Batman my thing went off, your termostat ok?
BATMAN: Yeah it's alright.

HAWKMAN: Hey is everything ok?
SUPERMAN: Yeah false alarm.

Good one!

 

[Dr. Fate]

ROBIN: It's kinda cold in here, I'll up the thermostat.

NIGHTWING: Don't touch the termostat, you know how Batman gets.
ROBIN: Aw come'on this thing goes up to 90.
*turns termostat*

*batman bursts in the door*
BATMAN: Who touched the termostat?
ROBIN: How does he always know?
BATMAN: Brain inplant Robin, every superhero has one, tells us when the sidekicks are messing with the termstat.

SUPERMAN: Hey Batman my thing went off, your termostat ok?
BATMAN: Yeah it's alright.

HAWKMAN: Hey is everything ok?
SUPERMAN: Yeah false alarm.

Bwahahahahahaha! Brilliant!

CRANE: "Catholics!"
BATMAN: "Protestants!"
CRANE: "Catholics!"
BATMAN: "Protestants!"

 

[Batman*]

Crane: David Prowse!
Batman: James Earl Jones!
Crane: David Prowse!
Batman: James Earl Jones!

 

[elorenishii386]

Crane: "Ouch!!! Why do you have to do this to me all the time? I didn't even do anything this time!"

Batman: "Don't hate the player, hate the game!"

Crane: "Wtf are you talking about?"

 

[Lunar_Wolf]

Crane: "Ouch!!! Why do you have to do this to me all the time? I didn't even do anything this time!"

Batman: "Don't hate the player, hate the game!"

Crane: "Wtf are you talking about?"

lol I'm one bad mood because my food as not arrived and this made me a bit better