Revenge of the Fallen TransPORNers.....?

[4NutzinYoface]

Ok first off I know there is a review thread but I just got back from the movies and have to HAVE to get this of my chest.....this film was a giant, steaming (..loved the first one by the way despite some goofy moments) pile of elephant **** that has been sitting on the sidewalk in the festering blistering heat for a few days....that was just peed on by Mojo..

NOW onto the real question here....did anyone else feel that this movie should have been called 'Transporners' intead of 'Transformers'?

I mean hey, I'm as rude and crude as the next sailor (I mean...take a look at my username for petes sake!!) but HOLY JUMPIN' there were waaaaayyy too many sex jokes in this movie! Like...literally every two seconds...I'm not kidding.

-Sam mom telling kids how he just recently 'popped his cherry'
-The shot of the dogs humping...ummm yeah so ...not once..but TWICE!!!
-The horny perverted College Professor flirting with those two ****es giving a sleazy innuendo filled lecture
-John Turturros hair pimply (did I mention hairy?) arse (seen in IMAX no less....geezus couldn't they have, for that shot at least made it you know...non IMAX...so didn't need to see all that detail) arse in that thong
-The HUMPING 'Vinny Da Goon Bot' from Brooklyn WTF?!
-When the old (BRITISH?!?!...what, do they get Monty Python on Cybertron?) Jetfire teleports everyone to Egypt and Boobs McGee there wakes up on Leo, Sams roommate, face down in his crotch
-The Cybertronian ****e Bot who tongues sams nads.....

...OH and SPEAKING OF NADS.....Will someone.....anyone.....please, PLEASE tell me what in the FLYING FAAACK they were thinking when putting giant balls on Devestator?!

"Im right under the enemy's testes sir!"......sigh...........what I am not understanding is that that single effects shot..you know, of Devestatos devestating ******** o' doom? Yeah, that probably took a few dudes locked in a room for days and nights coupled with thousands and thousands of $$$...at any ****ing point during this work, didn't anyone realize this isn't funny or stupid or ...I dunno......stupid?!?!...I'm sure there are more examples as well but those were the ones that stood out.


Now first off having a thinly veiled sexual innuendo is one thing, that is you know....funny for the grown ups in the crowd or people who 'get it'...but to have the movie peppered with sooo many of them watching all the nervous parents tug their shirt collars looking at their kids is another!

I nearly spat out my drink when I heard a little girl go "Daddy whats a cherry? What did Sams Mommy mean when she said that....eh?"


Like I said, the first movie was beautiful! Something about it, it was sooo awesome the action the story the way it was shot...this movie seemed lazy rushed and something written by a horny 14 year old for chrissakes!! I mean in the 1st movie I have to admit it was a little odd when Sams mom asked if he was yankin' off in his room and called it 'Sams Happy Time' or whatever...but this movie was FRIGGIN' ridiculous!



OH and P.S.---I want rights for the name 'TransPORNers'....I KNOW it's gonna catch on you watch!

 

[BLACK-SPIDEY]

you should´ve been with me in the theater, my crowd was great, when they show Tuturros ass everyone was laughing, and when Sam screams like a ***** everyone laughed their asses off, i think some people clapped at the end.

 

[Jake Cassidy]

^ I doubt anyone would miss you.

You better hope I never find out where you live.

 

[dark_b]

you should´ve been with me in the theater, my crowd was great, when they show Tuturros ass everyone was laughing, and when Sam screams like a ***** everyone laughed their asses off, i think some people clapped at the end.

in my theater it was similar.

 

[Aesop Rocks]

Flame war.

 

[4NutzinYoface]

you should´ve been with me in the theater, my crowd was great, when they show Tuturros ass everyone was laughing, and when Sam screams like a ***** everyone laughed their asses off, i think some people clapped at the end.

No no it's not like people weren't laughing or whatever it just that I dunno...something about anticipating a movie that sounds and looks so cool.....based of a kids toy line, awesome robot aliens battling each other, epic action sequences.....expecting that and then....one of the coolest robots in the movie has a giant swinging pair of ****ing balls.....or the chosen human teenager who fights alongside the leader of the Autobot soldiers in a race to save the world having his mom....after eating pot brownies yell out how her son got his 'cherry popped' recently....


I dunno it was just like pouring a big bowl of Reese Pieces peanut butter puff cereal and having the milk taste.....a little sour.

Again I'm not waving my finger saying 'NO SEX JOKES NO SEX JOKES'...just so many?! ..and some brutal ones....in a Transformers movie?!

Whats next...in the upcoming Masters of the Universe movies Man at Arms is going to give Orko a 'reach around'? Or Battlecat gives Hordak a Feltcher?

 

[Aesop Rocks]

Ok first off I know there is a review thread but I just got back from the movies and have to HAVE to get this of my chest.....this film was a giant, steaming (..loved the first one by the way despite some goofy moments) pile of elephant **** that has been sitting on the sidewalk in the festering blistering heat for a few days....that was just peed on by Mojo..

NOW onto the real question here....did anyone else feel that this movie should have been called 'Transporners' intead of 'Transformers'?

I mean hey, I'm as rude and crude as the next sailor (I mean...take a look at my username for petes sake!!) but HOLY JUMPIN' there were waaaaayyy too many sex jokes in this movie! Like...literally every two seconds...I'm not kidding.

-Sam mom telling kids how he just recently 'popped his cherry'
-The shot of the dogs humping...ummm yeah so ...not once..but TWICE!!!
-The horny perverted College Professor flirting with those two ****es giving a sleazy innuendo filled lecture
-John Turturros hair pimply (did I mention hairy?) arse (seen in IMAX no less....geezus couldn't they have, for that shot at least made it you know...non IMAX...so didn't need to see all that detail) arse in that thong
-The HUMPING 'Vinny Da Goon Bot' from Brooklyn WTF?!
-When the old (BRITISH?!?!...what, do they get Monty Python on Cybertron?) Jetfire teleports everyone to Egypt and Boobs McGee there wakes up on Leo, Sams roommate, face down in his crotch
-The Cybertronian ****e Bot who tongues sams nads.....

...OH and SPEAKING OF NADS.....Will someone.....anyone.....please, PLEASE tell me what in the FLYING FAAACK they were thinking when putting giant balls on Devestator?!

"Im right under the enemy's testes sir!"......sigh...........what I am not understanding is that that single effects shot..you know, of Devestatos devestating ******** o' doom? Yeah, that probably took a few dudes locked in a room for days and nights coupled with thousands and thousands of $$$...at any ****ing point during this work, didn't anyone realize this isn't funny or stupid or ...I dunno......stupid?!?!...I'm sure there are more examples as well but those were the ones that stood out.


Now first off having a thinly veiled sexual innuendo is one thing, that is you know....funny for the grown ups in the crowd or people who 'get it'...but to have the movie peppered with sooo many of them watching all the nervous parents tug their shirt collars looking at their kids is another!

I nearly spat out my drink when I heard a little girl go "Daddy whats a cherry? What did Sams Mommy mean when she said that....eh?"


Like I said, the first movie was beautiful! Something about it, it was sooo awesome the action the story the way it was shot...this movie seemed lazy rushed and something written by a horny 14 year old for chrissakes!! I mean in the 1st movie I have to admit it was a little odd when Sams mom asked if he was yankin' off in his room and called it 'Sams Happy Time' or whatever...but this movie was FRIGGIN' ridiculous!



OH and P.S.---I want rights for the name 'TransPORNers'....I KNOW it's gonna catch on you watch!

All of this coming from the guy with the most abstinent-based user name I think I've ever came acrossed.

 

[4NutzinYoface]

All of this coming from the guy with the most abstinent-based user name I think I've ever came acrossed.

How do you know that 'Nutz' isn't referring to cashews...or almonds perhaps? What...did you help out in the writing of this movie you perv? Get your mind out of the gutter....


Also are you blind moron? Did you not read my post?! I said I AM ALL FOR SEX/RUDE/CRUDE Jokes....look at my username......BUT in a Transformers movie?


Also all the babies who are getting all cranky and poopy and need to suck on a wittle milk bottle can take a chill pill...if you like the movie that's fine, I didn't say anything about anyone who enjoyed this piece of garbage....power to ya...I just know I won't ask any of you any recommendations when I want to rent a movie LOL! t:

 

[bkey]

I thought the sex jokes were way way over the top for a film like this. Also, the whole part at college felt like watching a bad porno to me. Just everything about it was ridiculously over the top and not in a good way.

 

[dark_b]

how was the college part like a porno?

 

[bkey]

Rainn Wilson's sexually metaphorical dialogue and flirting with those girls, the girl that was trying to get with Sam, I think her name was Alice. Maybe I'm the only one who felt that but that's the vibe I got from those scenes.

 

[Tony Stark]

I'm going to agree here. I'm no prude, but this movie really pushed it over the edge, especially for a "family" movie. I mean when Star Trek has less sexual content by comparison, you know they went overboard.

I did like the movie, but really alot of this stuff could have been cut. I personally don't want my kids to see mom eating marajuana brownies and having a trip.

This could have been a great, great movie, but going overboard on this stuff, really held the movie back.

 

[dark_b]

a lot of people are writting '' family''

well this is not a movie for 5 year olds. they have PG movies nad PIXAR movies for that.

 

[Jake Cassidy]

Exactly. It's not a 'family' movie. It's aimed at teenagers.

 

[8Diagrams(WU)]

The film was full of pointless things but mostly about sex. Way too much.

Balls on a transformer is as over the top as it gets.

If they had improved that over the previous movie this would have been a much more interesting film.

 

[Jake Cassidy]

I wanna know what kinda lame porn some of you guys are watching. t:

 

[hitmanyr2k]

I nearly spat out my drink when I heard a little girl go "Daddy whats a cherry? What did Sams Mommy mean when she said that....eh?"

 

[Tony Stark]

a lot of people are writting '' family''

well this is not a movie for 5 year olds. they have PG movies nad PIXAR movies for that.

No one said it was, but when there's more sexual/questionable content in this movie than in Star Trek, there's a problem.

 

[Tony Stark]

Exactly. It's not a 'family' movie. It's aimed at teenagers.

And alot of parents would have issues with some of the content for their teenagers, especially the younger teens.

You're not a parent so I don't expect you to understand.

 

[hitmanyr2k]

a lot of people are writting '' family''

well this is not a movie for 5 year olds. they have PG movies nad PIXAR movies for that.

If that's the case then I have no idea why Michael Bay is referring to kids when talking about the conception of characters like Skids and Mudflap. Wasn't he saying "young kids love these robots" and so on?

 

[Nivek]

This isn't Prince Caspian or Up, people. It's PG-13, and I love that Bay & Spielberg push it to it's limits.

 

[Jake Cassidy]

He probably means teenagers. I refer to teens as kids all the time.

 

[Mr. Earle]

This isn't Prince Caspian or Up, people. It's PG-13, and I love that Bay & Spielberg push it to it's limits.

It was Bay alone this time. Couldnt you tell? Hehe...

 

[dark_b]

If that's the case then I have no idea why Michael Bay is referring to kids when talking about the conception of characters like Skids and Mudflap. Wasn't he saying "young kids love these robots" and so on?

i think he didnt mean little kids that watch aladin. i think he meant from 10 and up.

 

[Tony Stark]

i think he didnt mean little kids that watch aladin. i think he meant from 10 and up.

And most of the stuff we are talking about is inappropriate for a 10 year old, and some even for a 15 year old.