I like the "difficult" Batman, as well. It suits him, and it fits his circumstances. There's a solid thematic reason as to why Batman is controlling, why he doesn't trust the superpowered set, and why he separates himself from them. Batman represents an athiestic (or at least humanist) perspective on life, where Superman and other superpowered folk represent a theistic perspective. I've said this in the past: Superman, sent from the skies to save us; Wonder Woman, made by the Gods themselves to bring us peace--they are nearly perfect in terms of morality, their power is a gift, and they use it to save the rest of us. They represent the idea that God will always be there to catch us when we fall, and, less mystically, the idea that mankind is fundamentally good.
Batman is different: the perspective he communicates is that of an atheist, humanist, and a realist: God isn't going to save us, people aren't fundamentally good (or bad), so we can't count on some ideal of righteousness to win the day unless we make it happen. The responsibility is ours to make the world work the way it's supposed to. Batman sees superpeople as a delegation of responsibility; human beings not wanting to deal with having to make the world better, so they let the Supermen do it. In Batman's mind, the ultimate responsibility to decide what is right and enforce it is in the hands of mankind, so he is fundamentally opposed to superheroes making decisions for anyone else.
More practically (as opposed to thematics I've been discussing), Batman is a control freak for a reason. It's integral to his character. I don't like it when writers say he feels guilty for not being able to save his parents. That's ridiculous. The truth is that he knows that the situation was beyond his control, and that's what he hates. Not that he could have done something to save them and didn't, but that there was nothing he could do. Everything in that moment was beyond his control, and he has resolved to never be out of control again.
So, naturally, he becomes a control freak. He plans and re-plans for everything. Sometimes that means manipulating people, sometimes it means planning against them just in case. That's Batman's approach to everything: just in case.