Apparently, Everyone's Good at Writing Bad Poetry

[pavlovs dogfood]

No joke, friends. Everyone is a poet in their own right these days, the awfulness of each poem only superceded by the awkwardness of the next. Every single girl my age I know thinks they're the next Emily Dickinson, or so it seems. Except they lack one thing that, certainly, is woeful to lack: any semblance of talent.

I'm not being harsh. Heck, even I get into the spirit. I present to you all, exclusive before to those lucky few awesome enough to be my friend on Myspace, my Very First Bad Poem:

the pain falls like rain
on my heart
torn apart
i have to fart
go to K Mart
why
i wanna fly
so high
like a ki...
TE!
oh yes.
oh my heck.
what the feck.
i like beck.
but only a little
i play my fiddle
not a violin
it wouldn't encompass my sadness
ness, ness...
i want to die
WHY?!
wither
away.
i bray
like a mule
i'm a fool
4 u

end.

Like it? Love it? Really love it? Let me know what you think.

 

[Halcohol]

My soul is crying.

 

[pavlovs dogfood]

I'm glad.

 

[Fried Gold]

Also, everyone is bad at writing good poetry

 

[pavlovs dogfood]

I've never tried, but I bet I'd be good at it. I excel at most things.

 

[Ash J. Williams]

It's almost so bad that it's good.

 

[Halcohol]

ness, ness...

I think this is my favourite passage.

 

[pavlovs dogfood]

I think I just accidentally wrote a really awesome poem. Surprise! It's totally simple.

In it, I compared a rocky relationship to the sun and the moon. But it's way more original than that.

Yeah, anyone can do this junk.

 

[GoldenAgeHero]

ehh did you even try?

 

[pavlovs dogfood]

It took me approximately four minutes, and it's quite lengthy.

It even rhymes.

I'm a poet, didn't know it (<--- zomgz! It's in my blood!)

 

[jimmy]

It transcends into my soul -- IN A DARK ABYSS OF TEARZ.

 

[GoldenAgeHero]

It took me approximately four minutes, and it's quite lengthy.

It even rhymes.

I'm a poet, didn't know it (<--- zomgz! It's in my blood!)

no its not. your poem has no real depth..its meaningless.

 

[jimmy]

But that's the point -- it's not supposed to mean anything.

Or is it?! What if, by meaning nothing, it actually has the opposite effect on the reader!

Wow. You just blew my mind.

 

[pavlovs dogfood]

I'm sure it applies to someone. Everything has meaning, dip.

 

[GoldenAgeHero]

pavlov, the ****e of my life
so possibilly trife
i decided to stab her with my knife

blood drips down her lovely lips
so thick and red
i laid on her on my bed

carefuly undressed,arms acrossed her chest
bleeding to death

tears stream down her face as she slowly suffocates
her pounding chest,her phanting breaths

with this gun, I'll end her misery
see ladies its not the end of chivalry

this one shot through this glock
when she told me she would'nt give a ****

with this bullet piercing through your chest
I'll finally put your lazy ass to rest

standing over your body remembering so fondly
the memories we shared,the tears we shed
has all come to an end.

With this chainsaw, i'll remove your legs and arms
I swear to god i never meant you any harm
Vrriiiin,Vrriiin,Vrriiiin, as the blood splatters on my face
you facking ****e i never knew how good you'd taste

with this poem i'll end my craziness,just to let you know that all i wanted was happiness.



and this ainta personal attack pavlov.




updated for pavlov.

 

[pavlovs dogfood]

GoldenAgeHero, a master poet
that awesome prose above should show it
he can do it better than you know
with the language of words he's a virtuoso

it's a little freaky, i mean, "maudlin"
he's desperately searching for a pan to flash in
his writing's a bit creepy
he wrote about killing me

and delighted in it

just because it has a rhyme but not a hint of wit
does not mean anyone should have to give a shhhhhh..
this is the close of my poem, since i have tact
i'll end it before it becomes a personal attack

 

[Ghostvirus]

No joke, friends. Everyone is a poet in their own right these days, the awfulness of each poem only superceded by the awkwardness of the next. Every single girl my age I know thinks they're the next Emily Dickinson, or so it seems. Except they lack one thing that, certainly, is woeful to lack: any semblance of talent.

I'm not being harsh. Heck, even I get into the spirit. I present to you all, exclusive before to those lucky few awesome enough to be my friend on Myspace, my Very First Bad Poem:

the pain falls like rain
on my heart
torn apart
i have to fart
go to K Mart
why
i wanna fly
so high
like a ki...
TE!
oh yes.
oh my heck.
what the feck.
i like beck.
but only a little
i play my fiddle
not a violin
it wouldn't encompass my sadness
ness, ness...
i want to die
WHY?!
wither
away.
i bray
like a mule
i'm a fool
4 u

end.

Like it? Love it? Really love it? Let me know what you think.

It certainly seems like you went out of your way to write bad. It seems you didn't even try to write a good poem. So kudos at failing purposefully.

At least the people you insulted were trying to do something good. Can't fault a person for trying to find there passion.

 

[GoldenAgeHero]

GoldenAgeHero, a master poet
that awesome prose above should show it
he can do it better than you know
with the language of words he's a virtuoso

it's a little freaky, i mean, "maudlin"
he's desperately searching for a pan to flash in
his writing's a bit creepy
he wrote about killing me

and delighted in it

just because it has a rhyme but not a hint of wit
does not mean anyone should have to give a shhhhhh..
this is the close of my poem, since i have tact
i'll end it before it becomes a personal attack

lol nice one.

 

[Wilhelm-Scream]

Here is my poem today:


Where do I sit?
This mobile Japanese peace garden?
No chef cooks here.
No bathers bathe.

The gentle sound
a whisper, out-singing man's engine
Outliving commuted-roar
and sighs multiplied

Seen, heard, a trillion times
and timeless
But now, crowned "rare" by time, and place...
Don't ****ing PISS on the ****ing BUS, Champ!

 

[Mr Sparkle]

ok so this thread is funny.
however, Pav seems to miss the point the point that almost always (but not in all cases for you overly technical ****s out there) to be "good"at something you first have to be outstandingly bad.

go fig.

 

[SLVRSR4]

I'm taking a creative writing class here is something i'll most likely hear.

though the scars of yesterday remain

i'll hold you till i can no longer contain

a love like this can never wane

just take a look from the blood stains

 

[Capt Throbberson]

oh my heck.
what the feck.
i like beck.

 

[terry78]

Now that was a handsome man. And I feel i am secure enough to say that.

 

[Eddie Brock]

This is a poem.
It doesn't rhyme.
I don't give a ****.

 

[The Geek Vault]

If life is so fair why do roses have thorns?