Hard choice

[Caliber]

Ok its me with another problem, ok I'm in a long distance relationship with this girl. So me a her were fine for a long time but now things seem different. We haven't talked as much as we used to and I feel distance from her. Yet I get this cold feeling from her when I say things like I miss you or I love you. I know it sounds stupid but its seriously bothering me. Shes spending time with her friends more and its seems shes more interested in them.

I'm really feeling from this and I'm feeling angry. I can't help anymore but I feel more like giving up because I don't talk as much with her, and I understand if shes busy. I'm thinking of giving up though I love her. Whats the common sense thing to do since I don't know what to do. Should I just break it of and find someone where I live or try to continue this but have a feeling of doubt?

 

[November Rain]

oooo, this one slipped under the radar....


let me ask, how long have you two been going out and what fraction of this time have you two been doing the long distance thing then?

 

[Childlike Wild]

Long-distance is hard, and not worth it unless you're both fully committed. It sounds like she wants to have a life without a phone glued to her ear, and I don't know your ages, but I'm guessing you're both pretty young and in need of some time to live without being tied down.

...And even if you're not that young, people grow apart. It seems like she has. Might be time to have an honest chat about the status of things.

 

[Erzengel]

Long distance relationships are doable if the light at the end of the relationship revolves around someone actually moving.

However in your situation, abscence sometimes makes the heart forget. She could A) be keeping herself busy to cope with you not being there B) found someone else.

If it's the former, you might want to talk to her about your whole relationship and where you and her see it going in the next few months.

 

[unstoppable]

yahoo messenger


if you have that already get her to get a web cam to know what she's doing

 

[Rambo, John J]

Ok its me with another problem, ok I'm in a long distance relationship with this girl. So me a her were fine for a long time but now things seem different. We haven't talked as much as we used to and I feel distance from her. Yet I get this cold feeling from her when I say things like I miss you or I love you. I know it sounds stupid but its seriously bothering me. Shes spending time with her friends more and its seems shes more interested in them.

I'm really feeling from this and I'm feeling angry. I can't help anymore but I feel more like giving up because I don't talk as much with her, and I understand if shes busy. I'm thinking of giving up though I love her. Whats the common sense thing to do since I don't know what to do. Should I just break it of and find someone where I live or try to continue this but have a feeling of doubt?

You're not gonna wanna hear this pal, but that little 'cold feeling' that you get - chances are it's spot on the money. If she's acting like she doesn't really care, it's her not-too-subtle way of giving you a hint and chance to end it before she has to. And women think we don't know how to read them.

In any case caliber, the fact that you're even questioning the entire situation speaks volumes. You know yourself what the deal is without having to come on here.

 

[Superman79]

Should I just break it off and find someone where I live or try to continue this but have a feeling of doubt?

In a word...YES.

Dude, I did the long distance thing, and frankly, when it gets to the point you are at (which my relationship did) it's fizzling out past saving. Just move on, life is not meant to be lived on the phone or driving back and forth from town to town. Life is meant to be lived as is...You'll find someone else, closer, who, I'm gonna bet, will care about you more than this chick.

I know it sounds calloous, but i really wish someone had told ME that when I was going through the same as you...move on bro.

 

[Erzengel]

I know it sounds calloous, but i really wish someone had told ME that when I was going through the same as you...move on bro.

You wouldn't have listened.

 

[Superman79]

You wouldn't have listened.

If you said it, then yes, I wouldn't have listened

 

[November Rain]

Long distance relationships are doable if the light at the end of the relationship revolves around someone actually moving.

However in your situation, abscence sometimes makes the heart forget. She could A) be keeping herself busy to cope with you not being there B) found someone else.

If it's the former, you might want to talk to her about your whole relationship and where you and her see it going in the next few months.

dude, open up another web window, go to youtube and load up this video, and look at your avatar move to it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CF03CN-YuVA

 

[Erzengel]

Just saying I never believed that hindsight was 20/20 because looking back is never the same as looking forward.

 

[Superman79]

Just saying I never believed that hindsight was 20/20 because looking back is never the same as looking forward.

yeah, I know...

 

[Erzengel]

dude, open up another web window, go to youtube and load up this video, and look at your avatar move to it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CF03CN-YuVA

I don't have speakers in the office.

 

[November Rain]

good lord, you're missing out on the funniest 10 seconds of your day



it's the outhere brothers, boom boom boom. try it when you get home, it's fairly humourous if you have a childish sense of humour...

 

[Caliber]

You're not gonna wanna hear this pal, but that little 'cold feeling' that you get - chances are it's spot on the money. If she's acting like she doesn't really care, it's her not-too-subtle way of giving you a hint and chance to end it before she has to. And women think we don't know how to read them.

In any case caliber, the fact that you're even questioning the entire situation speaks volumes. You know yourself what the deal is without having to come on here.

I'm only doubtful because it seems like thats the hint yet when I talked to her, she felt bad about kind of ignoring me.

 

[Caliber]

yahoo messenger


if you have that already get her to get a web cam to know what she's doing

We both have msn messenger but I can't afford a web cam right now.

 

[kane9321]

listen to your gut, if shes acting like she doesnt care anymore..well it might be true

 

[Caliber]

listen to your gut, if shes acting like she doesnt care anymore..well it might be true

I was thinking that but me a her talked and she felt bad. It confused me.

 

[Erzengel]

You're also 20 years old with what 2 years left in school. That's a long time to be with someone who you can only see every few months and also since you do a lot of growing up, soul searching and finding yourself at college.

 

[Caliber]

You're also 20 years old with what 2 years left in school. That's a long time to be with someone who you can only see every few months and also since you do a lot of growing up, soul searching and finding yourself at college.

I know what you mean and I have more than two years left. I feel I ofund myself already but I just seem to screw up by not finding someone good or making good choices.

 

[Cyma]

Erzengel is right. You’re too young to be tied down. My older cousin stayed in touch with his girlfriend when they were thousands of miles away for more than a year before they got married. As for my younger cousin….the relationship sadly ended.

If you love each other enough to marry then instead of playing hide-and-seek, why not just confront the problem instead of delaying it?

 

[Erzengel]

How far do you live away from her?

 

[Caliber]

Erzengel is right. You’re too young to be tied down. My older cousin stayed in touch with his girlfriend when they were thousands of miles away for more than a year before they got married. As for my younger cousin….the relationship sadly ended.

If you love each other enough to marry then instead of playing hide-and-seek, why not just confront the problem instead of delaying it?

I did confront but this is like the third talk about something like this. I have talked witha nd she blames herself but I understand that she goes out. I do want to try to fix but I don't think its going to be fixed. Dumping her seems like a good option now but I have to talk to her again.

 

[Caliber]

How far do you live away from her?

Really far away.

 

[Erzengel]

How many time zones?