I'm Quite Concerned...

[The Original Bamfer]

Who would have ever thought that something so innocent and sweet could have caused so much pain and suffering?

On the Eve of September 30th, 2008, I traveled through the long isles of my local Wal-mart with a few dollars to spare and a sweet tooth that would not ****! I paused my journey at the endless bags of candy. You know, the ones in the orange and black boxes, advertising them for Halloween. Well, let me tell you something, Wal-Mart, I am one sharp tack, my friend. I know you sell that candy year-round... Don't try to fool me. My skin began to itch at the cornucopia of chocolate (it really sucks being allergic to chocolate). All of a sudden, a breath of fresh air! A bag of white chocolate Reese's miniatures gazed back at me romantically. It was as if it were written in the cosmos. Do I believe in love at first sight? I do now...

But little did I know just how heartbreaking love can be.

I purchased the bag and it was time to head home. But, when I finally opened the bag... I was shocked. I found a wrapper with no white chocolate Reese's miniature in it. It was collapsed and scrunched together, you know, like folks do after they eat one... they collapse the wrapper. I can't find a better word. Anyway. How does this happen? How, in a sealed bag, is there a candy-less wrapper? Did the machinery make a mistake back at the factory? Did some asshat factory worker eat one of my precious white chocolate Reese's miniatures? Should I be concerned about my health and/or safety? Why am I making a thread about this?!

Anyway, I'm eating them right now and they couldn't be more delicious.

 

[JP]

Who's gonna play you in the movie?

 

[AndThePickles]

Oh man, you're allergic to chocolate?! I would die, because I'd end up stuffing my face one day out of the intense cravings.

 

[Zephyr Alexian]

All of a sudden, a breath of fresh air! A bag of white chocolate Reese's miniatures gazed back at me romantically. It was as if it were written in the cosmos. Do I believe in love at first sight? I do now...

Was there a long pause as you hurdled in slow motion towards the object of your affection?

I purchased the bag and it was time to head home. But, when I finally opened the bag... I was shocked. I found a wrapper with no white chocolate Reese's miniature in it. It was collapsed and scrunched together, you know, like folks do after they eat one... they collapse the wrapper. I can't find a better word. Anyway. How does this happen?

Maybe you ate one and didn't realize it because your mind was elsewhere. Either that or magic.

How, in a sealed bag, is there a candy-less wrapper?

Spite.

Did the machinery make a mistake back at the factory?

Error. Illogical query. Machines do not miscalculate.

Did some asshat factory worker eat one of my precious white chocolate Reese's miniatures?

Not one. Many friend. Many.

Should I be concerned about my health and/or safety?

What happened to love at first sight? The lure of the healthily forbidden?

Why am I making a thread about this?!

To ensure that somewhere along the many posts in this thread, you leave enough evidence to loosely determine the true nature of your will. . . .god forbid, but just in case.

Anyway, I'm eating them right now and they couldn't be more delicious.

Eat another pack for the Hype.

 

[JP]

I have diabetes.

 

[Mee]

Reese's suck.


Yeah, I said it.

 

[Abstract]

Mmmm. White chocolate is my favourite.

Your story reminds me of the other day when I opened up one of those fruit bar things and found 3/4 gone. Weird eh?

I love those things too . . .

 

[Jennifer Walters]

Who's gonna play you in the movie?

Tori Spelling.

 

[Majic Walrus]

White chocolate is gross. It's like chocolate without any of the goodness and extra pontification.

 

[Jennifer Walters]

White Chocolate can be quite delicious in some cases. The gross chocolate is dark chocolate.

 

[AndThePickles]

White Chocolate can be quite delicious in some cases. The gross chocolate is dark chocolate.

Blasphemy!

 

[Untilteld]

White Chocolate can be quite delicious in some cases. The gross chocolate is dark chocolate.

White Chocolate owns all.

 

[Jennifer Walters]

Blasphemy!

It's too fricking bitter. Chocolate should be sweet.

 

[AndThePickles]

It's too fricking bitter. Chocolate should be sweet.

I felt that way when I was younger, but then I really acquired a massive taste for it. Really good dark chocolate doesn't taste bitter, just absolutely delicious :heart:

 

[PWN3R]

I think it's both hilarious and poetic that I just happened to be randomly eating a Cadbury Fruit & Nut chocolate bar while reading this tragic tale.

I'm a fattie

 

[The Original Bamfer]

Oh man, you're allergic to chocolate?! I would die, because I'd end up stuffing my face one day out of the intense cravings.

I think I've come close before.

Luckily, it's not a severe allergy, so I can have some in moderation. But even then, I get very uncomfortable.

Eat another pack for the Hype.

I might have to!

Reese's suck.


Yeah, I said it.

Go to bed!

Mmmm. White chocolate is my favourite.

Your story reminds me of the other day when I opened up one of those fruit bar things and found 3/4 gone. Weird eh?

I love those things too . . .

Food is strange!

Blasphemy!

I agree! Dark chocolate is frequently delicious. Hershey's has amazing, pure Extra Dark Chocolate with Cranberries, Blueberries and Almonds. I definitely recommend it.

It was totally worth the hives.

It's too fricking bitter. Chocolate should be sweet.

You are beyond ridiculous!

 

[JP]

Dark Chocolate >>>>>>>>>> White (Not)Chocolate

 

[PWN3R]

Dark Chocolate >>>>>>>>>> White (Not)Chocolate

truth

 

[Untilteld]

truth

pwn3r.

 

[The Original Bamfer]

If I had a choice, I certainly wouldn't be binging on that synthetic (though sometimes delicious) garbage.

 

[Noon]

http://www.beastiemixes.com/images2/othersites/reeses.htm

yum

 

[PWN3R]

pwn3r.

White chocolate is the ******ed and arm-less cousin of the oh so handsome dark chocolate.

It's science.

 

[AndThePickles]

I agree! Dark chocolate is frequently delicious. Hershey's has amazing, pure Extra Dark Chocolate with Cranberries, Blueberries and Almonds. I definitely recommend it.

Mmm, I love dark chocolate with fruit in it. Hershey's kind is good, although I tend to prefer other brands of chocolate. I'd still eat Hershey's whenever though, because I'm no chocolate snob Any dark kind with 70+ percent cacao is amazing. I also love going to Godiva whenever I'm in a mall and getting one of their dark chocolate frozen drinks. Man, now I'm craving

 

[PWN3R]

http://www.beastiemixes.com/images2/othersites/reeses.htm

yum

Oh dear Jesus, if I were the one to have opened that, I'm pretty sure I would have dropped dead from terror right then and there.

O. M. G. W. T. F.

 

[Badger]

Oh, poor poor Shortstack. How can one be allergic to chocolate!??!?? It is unnatural, further proof that you are indeed a hobbit.

On a somewhat related note... I have given up sweets for the most part, but I love, I mean love, Oreos. Not so much the creme, but the cookie. I swear to God they are made by angels. So understandable I was very upset, that I could no longer enjoy Oreos. But then, I found that they had 100 calorie pack Mini Oreos without the creme. It was the best day of my life, well beside getting married or all the other important things.