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The Crow


Oct 21, 2014
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This is a vigilante-fable I couldn't resist writing before retiring, and it's inspired by one of my favorite comics-adapted dystopian movies, The Crow (LINK).

Thanks so much for reading (signing off!),


Ajay Satan moved from Algeria to America in the 1980s and began work at a modeling agency as a photographer after graduating from Dartmouth College with a degree in photography. He liked to wear special ornamental plastic masks while taking photos of the female models for Vogue and Vanity Fair. He was told one day that the modeling agency was secretly going to be paid to supply celebrity party guests with model-escorts. Ajay discovered these models were being abused and exploited at the celebrity parties and decided to put on one of his iconic plastic masks and go to work (underground!) as a vigilante named 'The Crow' (inspired by a series of comics about an urban mystical angel of justice!).


The 1980s saw a miraculous profligation of mobile handheld phones ('cell-phones') with handy-dandy built-in cameras. Ajay Satan ('The Crow') decided to carry a special T-Mobile cell-phone and use it to take photos and mementos of some of the beautiful models at his agency who'd be sent to the decadent celebrity parties as 'trophies' of sin! The Crow would use these mobile photos to scare indulgent celebrities into thinking these endangered party-models were society symbols of exploited magazine imagination! He distributed photos of one model named Alexandra to members of the US Senate in D.C.


The Crow then took his Polaroid instant-camera in a hot air balloon and used the handy-dandy camera to take instant-photos of the endangered party-models (stored in his equally handy-dandy cell-phone). The Crow dropped thousands of these Polaroid photos of the models all over Manhattan on Valentine's Day! He then sent the New York Post newspaper an editorial describing his special 'hot air balloon' sentimental deed as a 'heroic act' of modern-day anti-consumerism evangelism. The Crow was being called a modern-day Thomas Nast!


However, an insidious actor-celebrity connected to the real-life 'Crow' media/comics franchise retaliated against Ajay Satan, since this celebrity was one of the indulgent 'power-merchants' benefiting from the exploitation of the models sent to the celebrity-parties in cities such as D.C. and Manhattan! This subversive celebrity accused the idealistic Ajay Satan of being nothing more than an anti-capitalism punk, and he dared Ajay to produce substantive media/entertainment activities that could glorify American daydreams. This real-life 'Devil's Advocate' became a deflating thorn in Ajay's anti-glamour crusade!


The Crow (Ajay Satan) met the new challenge by making terrific paintings of Polaroid cameras on small Hallmark greeting-cards and placing these cards on the footsteps of churches all over NYC. When the Crow sent an editorial to the Post describing this new evangelical deed, claiming it illuminated an important principle regarding American merchandising, people started calling the Crow a 'cool messenger' of urban psychiatry. The Crow had refuted the ugly claim that modern-day anti-exploitation 'art' couldn't be a real thing of social dance. He turned glamour into a conversation about human materials!


The Crow (Ajay Satan) single-handedly resurrected the popularity of the comic book franchise presenting vigilante characters with super-heroic optimism! In fact, some of these comic books now featured stories about everyday people working to confront urban moral paranoia! The Crow was thrilled this trend might translate into tangible values-driven experimental merchandising. After all, the comic book marketplace represented real American dials, and consumers were becoming more conscious of modern piracy!


The Crow (Ajay Satan) decided to then distribute artistic images of leviathan-like red snakes to various MTV music-video producers, in the hope they'd make rock-band videos with some kind of snake imagery! These broadcast images of snakes on TV would represent an 'American awakening' towards justified media vigilance. Snakes, after all, symbolized social imagination towards life-vitality caution, and the Crow sought to promote Christian ideas about urban lifestyle dollars. Was he a DJ?


Years later, the Post featured a piece about 'The Crow' (Ajay Satan) as a modern world urban 'fiddler' of commercial sanity fears. They described him as someone who just might make American consumers more thoughtful towards the lifestyle amenities that remind everyone of First World dances. After all, it's the 'toys' that make real life seem more...democratic (and dioramic).



:ali: IMG_0353.PNG IMG_0355.PNG
Venger & Harley Quinn

I liked how that vigilantism parable worked out, so here's a more mystical addendum about customs controversy, inspired by the film Legally Blonde.


"All these intriguing civilization activities prompted two mystical characters from the underworld to ascend to Earth and debate about the parametrics of capitalism and vain ambitions and why perhaps such worldly controversies created intrigue regarding the customs of developed societies. These two characters from the underworld, Sheol, were Venger (a red warlock) and Harley Quinn (a firebrand-woman). Venger was more conservative than Harley Quinn and represented the standards of gender-expectations in developed governed society, though he was quite liberal in view!"


"Harley Quinn was a maudlin-like anarchist and messenger of social uncertainty. She wore tons of make-up and enjoyed punk-rock music and held an interest in Communism. Harley Quinn was much more liberal than Venger and disagreed with him about the 'fixtures' of social customs geometry and wondered in vigilantism emerged as a necessity in America because of people's desire for entreating the 'vagaries' of justice. Harley Quinn was therefore excited to challenge anyone who debated about 'normal' etiquette!"


VENGER: It seems Americans are pensive about robust vanities.
HARLEY QUINN: Media creates interests in commercial lust!
VENGER: Americans don't like censorship.
HARLEY QUINN: Vigilantism emerged out of an interest in anarchy!
VENGER: Well, perhaps 'magazine-imagination' constructs pedestrian thrills.
HARLEY QUINN: Are you an advocate of Facebook?
VENGER: American social networking websites symbolize consumerism pride.
HARLEY QUINN: What's wrong with pride?
VENGER: Nothing, as long as it doesn't breed customs-outlaws.
HARLEY QUINN: You're rather conservative in the arena of democracy!
VENGER: I prefer views catering to the history of law.
HARLEY QUINN: Why are you a warlock?
VENGER: I'm interested in the 'magic' of capitalism.
HARLEY QUINN: Isn't America really a reflection of power?
VENGER: The construction of democratic variables leads to debate.
HARLEY QUINN: So power is negotiable?
VENGER: Since power can be personal, it promotes objectivity.
HARLEY QUINN: I disagree that consumerism is a system!
VENGER: Doesn't it seem that Facebook represents macro-customs?
HARLEY QUINN: The desire for vigilantism arises from the sea of traffic.
VENGER: In that case, lets agree that American media is constructive!
HARLEY QUINN: I'll concede that media is a thing of inventiveness.
VENGER: I'll concede that fashion-models represent true potential.
HARLEY QUINN: It seems American pride is all about inventiveness!
VENGER: Maybe we should watch some American movies about socialism.
HARLEY QUINN: Alright; we can continue this argument about social vanities.


The Blue Ninja

This extra section necessary for good wholesome chatter is about selecting the right causes and was inspired by the vigilantism-parody movie Kick-Ass.



A new vigilante burst onto the scene, inspired by the iconic Crow. This vigilante was from Australia and at first called himself Raven before settling on the alias Batman. After this Aussie Batman took down a lethal armed robbery gang called Black Mask, people were calling this 'Hazy-Jane Aussie' the Dark Knight!


Batman, not unlike the Crow, took images of media dolls, actresses off the Internet and carried them around on his iPhone. Batman wanted to walk by random pedestrians and show them these phone-pics of attractive actresses and ask them what they thought about safe-sex in the 21st Century. You see, Batman wanted Americans to think about what comprised real-life dangers linked to moral apathy.


The Lampoon was calling Batman a natural eccentric, saying he was raising social consciousness through layman-guerrilla tactics! They felt Batman should blog on the Internet using some clever and catchy hero icon/avatar. Batman wondered what a modern-day crusading avatar would fit his offbeat street-mission. He wanted something that would suit or reflect his passion.


Batman considered using a simple and basic fencing athlete icon as his blog-avatar, but it'd been years since he was a skilled practicing fencer and didn't feel confident. Batman wanted an avatar with some kind of mask or helmet. He was getting anxious!


Finally, Batman chose a nifty Blue Ninja as his avatar. Using the Blue Ninja for his blog-persona, Batman talked about meeting actresses in nightclubs and engaging in promiscuous sex without attention to medical hygiene. As the Blue Ninja, Batman could talk about the appearance of apathy as a side-effect of commerce and entertainment and urbanization. He became quite popular!


Batman afforded his Blue Ninja avatar a set of nifty street-weapons such as a blue gun and suggested the urban crusader would use such weaponry to take down vandals employed by crime syndicates. Batman ('Blue Ninja') asked, "How can we destroy urban sin without addressing the vices accessible enough to make social ruin pedestrian (e.g., AIDS)?" The Blue Ninja quickly became an STD-avatar referenced by the online LGBT community.


Batman enrolled at the affordable Babson University business-school to learn more about social marketing. He wanted to learn how to make Blue Ninja a thing of economIc use! He kept a bunch of relevant books in his girlfriend's apartment which were relevant to his research, and he kept them by a piggy-bank doll his girlfriend kept!


His girlfriend, Talia, had connections to the art world and was intrigued by how his Blue Ninja avatar had quickly become an underground political icon cited by the LGBT community! She arranged for a society journalist to talk about how the Blue Ninja had become a worldly Aunt Jemima. Batman was so grateful to his girlfriend.


Batman wrote a series of short stories about him meeting a European art world woman named Talia al Ghul who'd introduce him to the complex world of urban journalism. Talia was obviously modeled after Batman's girlfriend. Batman believed he was honoring the vigilantism of the Crow.


BATMAN: You're very beautiful.
TALIA: You can use beauty for marketing.
BATMAN: Do you think it's safe, dear?
TALIA: You're so paranoid for a crusader!
BATMAN: The world is mad, my love.
TALIA: All this teleology is making my butt sweat!
BATMAN: We have to inspire lifestyle hygiene.
TALIA: Medicine is the new laurel.
BATMAN: Hey, medicine-men are superheroes too.


The Glass House

One extra piece about finding podiums in everyday psychology (in America!).


An intelligent Ivy League student who loved to make color-pencil doodles made a strange 'capitalism-astrology' avatar named Aquarius who symbolized democratic idealism. This student, Amlan, wanted to pit his funny capitalism doodle-avatar against a fictional wolffish Transformers (Hasbro) jet-fighter robot named Cyclonus. Amlan was passionate about usin or referencing 'imaginarium avatars' for cool stories about modern madness in online fanzines, making Amlan a rather iconic online social critic.


Amlan's 'Aquarius' character was to defend the pillars of 21st Century American capitalism and find ways to fend off any wolffish critique posed by the fictional robot Cyclonus. Aquarius was regal in appearance but also strangely resembled an 'outlander' or 'warrior' who represented basic chivalry. Amlan wanted to measure the social weight of consumerism and entertainment by using his 'Aquarius' to talk about American pride.


Cyclonus was already quite a popular folk character in robot cartoons and was sold as a toy to many youngsters. Cyclonus symbolized complex wolffish Machiavellian focus on the profitability of piracy in competitive systems or scenarios. He was therefore a useful avatar for Amlan's offbeat political dioramas about the sensitivity of modern sociology and terrorism folklore. Cyclonus was, after all, pure evil.


Amlan showed his clever Aquarius-Cyclonus fanzine piece to a Hollywood actress who was attending a California comics-fanzine convention that celebrity Leo DiCaprio was attending to promote his new eco-conscious Captain Planet movie. Amlan met this intelligent actress and told her he wanted to see how many ways a modern layman social critic could dissect capitalism rhetoric for hip young audiences. The actress was impressed and texted Amlan and invited him to her house where he'd meet a comic book publisher who'd sponsor his works for a broader American audience. Amlan was lucky to have met this connected actress.


The gracious actress showed Amlan her collection of gorgeous glass sea-horses and told him they symbolized eco-consciousness about water pollution to her. He admitted they were quite lovely, and he started seeing flashes of brilliance, connecting her glass sea-horses to various fantastic 'avatars' he'd be excited to use for his comic book oriented political dioramas. She gifted the clever young Ivy League student with two of her fine glass sea-horses.


Amlan decided to then create an inspired Aquarius-Cyclonus political cartoon with the Marvel Comics heroine-avatar Scarlet Witch. Amlan cast Scarlet Witch as an Occult practitioner, grading Aquarius and Cyclonus as they debated about capitalism vigilance. Amlan remembered the heroism folklore of the 'Crow' when he decided to pair the aesthetic and amazing Scarlet Witch.


AQUARIUS: America is an invention!
CYCLONUS: Capitalists liberally exploit fashion.
AQUARIUS: Piracy does not nullify profit-sharing!
CYCLONUS: American tales about vigilantes reveal emotionalism.
AQUARIUS: Consumers have a right to entreat urban masquerade!
CYCLONUS: Capitalism can feel like a charade because of envy.
AQUARIUS: The duty of the patriot is to champion merchants!
CYCLONUS: Perhaps there's wiggle-room for serious romance.



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