He could see the fish, flitting here and there like aquatic birds; too quick and too far to spear. But he could wait to strike. He was always good at waiting. He gripped onto the bank, his fingers digging into the dirt as the world tilted again.
Gambit shifted, and Wolverine spared a glance over, but the kidd just rolled onto his side without waking.
He looked back down at the water, but then frowned, distracted from the fish by his reflection. His image shone back clear in the water, his hair shorter after having been burned off during the fight. He brought up a hand slowly, feeling the growing stubble the side of his face before pushing his hair from his forehead.
In his blurred vision, he really looked like a man, with the shorter hair. He could see his eyes, his face. Could have been almost any mans face, any mans eyes.
No shirt again, and his face and arms were smeared dark with drying bloodand now that he noticed it, it was rather uncomfortable. He must really be out of it to have forgotten all the blood. It stank like hell. But without his wide hair he could see his face, his eyes.
He didnt recognize himself.
Hell, he doubted he could have recognized himself out of a lineup.
A what?
Wolverine? Dat you?
Wolverines head snapped up and around, and he threw out a hand to keep from falling clean over as his head spun.
Stupid question. Who else would be out here like this?
Gambit sat up, rubbing his face and smearing a spot of mud across his cheek. Glad to see you up, mon ami. You alrigh'?
Wolverine ignored him, rubbing his eyes and looking back down at the water and his reflection.
Remy stood and stretched as he came over. Mon dieu, you look awful, petit. How you walk here, like dis?" He paused. "What you lookin at?
Too much a bother to think right now. Food. Drink. Then maybe hed listen to the kid. Right now he was just getting in the way.
He couldnt think. The words jarred in his ears, like metal on metal. It hurt his teeth, and he grimaced, trying to block him out. Maybe hed get the hintgo back to sleep. Let him sit, not thinking.
Gambit knelt down next to him a safe distance away, but peered inhis reflection falling next to Wolverines.
Ah, he said.
They were silent for a moment. A rabbit screamed and was cut off sharply as something killed itfar away. The kid probably couldnt hear it. A blue bird flitted overhead, casting an eye on them before darting away.
You think dey come back? Gambit asked, almost a whisper. For a second he stank of fear, and actually looked his young age.
Wolverine ducked his head, swallowing roughly. Maybe the kidd go away if he ignored him. Couldnt think to talk right now. His stomach was rolling, and the kids human stink wasnt helping. God, they were coming after them still, werent they? He shouldnt be stopping, he couldnt stop . . . .
Be after him again. Gunfire ricocheting off rocks around him, off his bones, slicing through his skin and driving him down. Fire and gas and hate ripping him to shreds
Blood and rage clotting up his lungs. He was going to be sick.
Breathe.
It didnt matter. They werent here now; the forest was silent. The kid wasnt them. They werent there.
Block the kid out. Look for the fish. He had to get food first. Then hed think.
Gambit pulled at grass on the banks edge absently. Dose people . . . dey . . . dey da ones who gave you da claws, petit?
Gave him his claws?
How the hell would they do that? Why the hell would they . . . ?
Damn, his head hurt. Heart pounding around in there like a gong.
It didnt matter. Itd go away as he healed. He was just still weak from getting shot to pieces. Couldnt remember ever getting hit so bad.
Dats it, Gambit mused out loud, seemingly unbothered by being studiously ignored. Dey gave you dem claws, and somehow you got way, but not fore dey drove you crazy first.
Wolverine glanced over at that, giving him an unreadable stare before turning back to the water. Encouraged for some reason by this, the kid continued.
But you gettin better. You not da animal dey think you are. Dats how you got dem, didnt you? Dey thought youd go down easier, non?
He stepped forward, drawing close enough that Wolverine shuffled over a step to keep his personal space. Listen, Canuck. I know you talk. You understan what Gambits sayin, non? Deres jus nothin you wan ta say, is dere? He was watching him with a strange intensity, and it made Wolverines skin crawl. He glared at him, baring a canine in a silent warning as he turned his back to him.
Go away.
You don want ta hear dis? You tink disll all go way? Is it dat you don want ta hear da answers, Wolvie, or dat you don know how ta ask da questions?
Fine, Remy tell ya. You a man. You got a namenot Wolverinelike . . . Bob, or John, or Harry . . . . He trailed off at Wolverines sideways glance, holding up his gloved hands. Don lookt me dat way! Gambit not da crazy one, here.
Wolverine looked away. Shut thhell up, he growled. Speaking hurt. Tasted like iron, like a serrated knife against rust.
See? You talk fine. You come wit Gambit. I got da money here still from da bar all dose days agowe go tNawlins. Da best place ta hide from dese guysd be wit uder peopleden we go huntin. You smarter dan you look, Wolvie. Gambit tinkmon dieu!
Wolverine suddenly plunged face-first into the water, and Gambit pulled back with a shout as water splashed over his face and front.
Wolvie, you! Wolverine hadnt resurfaced yet, and Gambit leaned over, water dripping from his hair. The river had gone quiet. Wolverine!
Silence answered.
Damn, Gambit breathed. He started pulling off his coat.
There was a loud gasp as Wolverine surfaced mid-stream. The dried blood was streaming down his face and staining the water around him. He swam towards shore and dragged himself out, shivering.
Gambit shrugged his coat back on and hurried to grab his arm. You crazy, Canuck. Look ready to fall righ over like dat, and you try ta go swimmin?
SNAKT. Wolverine pulled away from him.
Missed the fish. Too slow. Too damn slow.
Water was cold. Got him shivering all over again.
God, for a moment there the water had caught at himdragging him down to the bottom, muscles too tired to pull him back to the air.
Weak. And still hungry. Breath was catching in his chest, like his lungs were half-full of water.
So dats it, Remy concluded, shaking water from his coat. If you not gonna talk, Ill see. We go tNawlins.
Wolverine didnt even look at him, sitting down and shaking his head to scatter water droplets onto the ground, trying to breathe. He pressed against his forehead, twisting his fingers through his hair. He clenched his teeth to keep them from chattering.
Why was the kid still talking?
Dont gimme dat, Gambit said. Oi, you take dese guys by surprise dis timebut deyll be comin again. Gambit crossed his arms, taking a safe step back. What da matter? Scared, Wolverine?
Shut up. Shut up. You dont know what youre talkin about.
Dats it, Remy nodded. You scared. You scared to know what happened. You jus wanna hide. How long you been out here, anyway? You got kids waitin for you somewhere? Maybe a belle donna? You don know? Don you wanna find out?
Wolverine crawled to his feet carefully, panting. He didnt like this. He didnt like the way the kid was looking at him, talking to him, like he knew somethinglike he could understand. Not even Wolverine understoodhow could some damn kid?
His growl deepened in warning.
Shut∙up∙shut∙up∙dont∙watch∙dont∙look∙eyes∙watching∙prying∙asking∙head∙spinning∙dont∙know∙dont∙think . . . .
He put a hand to his head.
You gon ignore Gambit? Very nice, homme. Jus like you ignore dose dreams, jus like you run away from de guys who chase you. You jus run away and hide. Let dem chase you down like an animal, like a goddamn animal, cause dats all you gonna be, like dis, runnin
Wolverine staggeredgrabbing onto a tree as his legs grew weak beneath him and his vision went white.
Always running.
Breathe.
But theyd always find him, wouldnt they? Theyd always find himhunt him, chase him, killing, killing killing. Ripping him open and picking him apart and changing his bones to fire and pain and hate . . . .
Breathe!
His grip was hard and painful on the treehis knuckles white from the grip as his fingernails dug into the bark.
He could hear a voicedistant, rambling. Didnt make sense at first.
when da last time you eat, mon ami? You sleep? You were all but dead, Wolvie. You gon go get killednot wit guns or all dat crazy stuff. You gon get so tired dey get you, cause you always runnin
Wolverine snapped up, his eyes burning as he whipped around, grabbing the kids throat so he hardly had time for a strangled yelp. He whipped him around, slamming him against the tree and leaning close to his face, trembling with fury.
You. Dont. Know. What. The. Hell. Youre. Talkin. About! Wolverine snarled.
Gambits face had gone pale. He gasped in vain for air, struggling to speak.
A flex of his fingers and he wouldnt be his problem anymore.
One twitch, he wouldnt have to listen anymore. Hed be free.
His mouth was dry. He felt feverishthe water on his burning skin felt like ice. The air was freezing in his lungs, choking him.
Wolverine let go and Gambit slumped over, grabbing his throat and coughing as he gasped for air.
Jusjus The kid tried to speak. He looked up, his eyes wide, and for the first time fear shone in their red depths. W-wo
Kill him.
Wolverine stared at him, his fingers twitching.
He was human. The enemy. Watching him and picking over him
Chasing away his prey, making him weak. Get rid of him.
Kill him.
NO!
No. Kid was stupid, but he couldnt kill him. He wasnt like the soldiers. He was a freak, a freak like him . . . .
Not like him.
He pried his fingers from the kids throat, turned, and bolted.
Adrenaline made up for exhaustion. He randisappearing into the wood and not slowing. He sliced at a foot-thick tree and sent it tumbling as he ran, the ripping sound as it fell.
Red colored his vision. His breath came in growls, and he trembled with fury.
But there was nothing to kill, nothing. Even if there was, it wouldnt be enough. He knew it.
This was a different kind of rage.
He bolted, startling a doe across a meadow and sending it darting away.
Something was wrong. Something was wrong.
It was all wrong.
A rabbit darted across the path and he didnt hesitate. He leaped on it, snapping its neck as he caught it in his fingers. He popped his claws, ripping into it. Hed snarfed down half the meat in seconds.
The blood was bitter and hot. He hated it. He hated the claws gleaming with silver and blood in the lighthated the fading pain from popping them. Hated how the pain faded. Hated the damn sun and the damn trees and the damn dirt and smells and sounds and blood and meat. Hated the fur catching in his teeth, hated the dead eyes staring up at himhated how he loved it, needed it, craved it.
His head spun as he twisted away, whipping the rabbit corpse away from him. It slammed into a tree, splashing the tree in red.
He hated crouching there in less than rags. Hated how blood and water stained his chest. Hated the men in his dreams and chasing him and hated menall men. He hated so thick it made bile rise in his throat, mixing with hot blood, choking his breath. Hated ever seeing man, ever knowing he was man, ever knowing, ever thinking. Hated it all.
He turned back to the path, letting the red fill his visionletting go.
RRRRRRRaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh!
It was easier. So much easier.
Weakness and pain forgotteneverything forgottenhe ran.
TBC . . . .