Random Simpsons Quotes Thread

[Wheels]

If Marge marries Artie I'll never be born.

 

[Darkness Falls]

Homers snore system turns on music plays

(to the tune of sweet dreams)

Artie: He's a loser marge.... dump him
I travel the world and the seven seas
i am watching, you through a camera

*marge opens her eyes*

 

[Mdizzle]

"Take 'em away, boys"
"Hey, that's my line! Bake 'em away, toys!"
"What'd you say, Chief?"
"Just do as the kid says."

 

[nite-owl]

Dental Plan!!!

 

[Obi-Ron]

Lisa needs braces!

 

[simplysuperhero]

Homer answering the phone:"You're going to have to speak up, I'm only wearing a towel."

 

[Mdizzle]

Dental plan!!!

 

[Mdizzle]

"I am so smart!S-M-R-T! I mean, S-M-A-R-T!"

 

[Go Web Go!]

"Awww. The Denver Broncos?"

 

[Dr. Evil]

Lisa needs braces!

 

[Darkness Falls]

Patty and selma: so who's gay

(the critic thinks, homer whispers something in his ear)

Critic: Mcguyver's gay.........

(patty and selma tower over critic, homer giggles as he crawls away, next shot the critic hangs from the roof by his underwear)

Bart: ha ha u bad mouthed mcguyver didn't u

Critic: .......

 

[Wheels]

Homer: Save me Chaka Khan! Chaka Khan!

 

[Obi-Ron]

Chief Wiggum: JAMMING!

 

[Go Web Go!]

"Happy Birthday, Mr. Smitherrrs"

 

[K.B.]

[Bart throwing ice cream at Lisa]
Bart:" Texas snowball fight!"

 

[ChaoticPsylocke]

Homers snore system turns on music plays

(to the tune of sweet dreams)

Artie: He's a loser marge.... dump him
I travel the world and the seven seas
i am watching, you through a camera

*marge opens her eyes*

that is one of my favorite simpsons scenes ever!!!!

 

[ChaoticPsylocke]

Bombardment!

 

[Rain]

This is HO-eh-Ma-her's doctor, he is to sick to work today.

 

[nite-owl]

Cheif Wiggum: Yeah and I'm Edward G. Robinson.

 

[Payle Gray]

You must find the Jade Monkey before the next full moon! -Mr. Burns

 

[Milu]

The Red Hot Chili Peppers are performing "Give it Away" at Krusty's Comeback Special in their underwear.

KRUSTY: "Men performing in underwear. How degrading . . . "

*the camera pans out to reveal Krusty wearing a Shirley Temple-esque ensemble*

 

[Mdizzle]

"Your mother has a new job now. She's a slot jockey."

 

[Rain]

Barny: We want chilly willy ! We want chilly willy !

 

[Darkness Falls]

(Homer's first meets Patty and selma

*opens Door*
Homer: Is Marge here..?

Patty: Who

Selma: or what are you ?

Homer: I'm her date

Patty: I suppose u want to come in

Homer: Yes please

(Homer walks in)

Selma: Marge's dates get homlier every year
Patty: That's what happens when u don't put out

 

[BATZARRO WWD]

Legs: Johnny Tightlips, where'd they hit ya?
Johnny Tightlips: I ain't sayin' nothin'.
Legs: But what'll I tell the doctor?
Johnny Tightlips: Tell him to suck a lemon.