Corrupt A Wish - Part 2

[NHawk19]

she didnt she's planning on releasing 9 more rock albums and 1 full of Christmas music. Featuring the song "I am Santa Claus"

I wish for a beer

 

[Duke]

Granted. You're the winner of a lifetime supply of beer, only it's in Europe.

I wish the 49ers would've kicked the Giants out of the playoffs, this year!

 

[NHawk19]

Granted but they loose the super bowl anyway to Tebow. Now everyone everywhere Tebow's and it's your fault.

I wish for Tebowing to end

 

[greenrage36]

Granted, but let me kneel down here for a sec.....




I wish I had a yoga instructor here at the pad...

 

[SE7EN]

Granted except the genie misheard you and sent yogi bear. Now you lie mauled to death on your living room floor rug (which by the way just happened to tie the room together nicely)

I wish I knew how to play piano and chess well.

Edit: same time or separately, either way is fine.

 

[greenrage36]

Granted, you can physically play chess and the piano at the same time starting tomorrow morning. Unfortunately, you can't stop doing either task or you're heart will explode...them pesky Grey aliens snuck in last night and made some 'changes' on yo' a**.....



I wish I had my very own pet Loch Ness Monster

 

[Rylvan]

Granted. It eats you.

I wish I could read at superspeed.

 

[Microchip]

Granted. The information overload drives you insane.

I wish McDonalds still made pizzas.

 

[greenrage36]

Granted, but the only kind they have available is the not-quite-chicken nugget surprise (as in you'd be surprised just what the hell you were actually eating)




I wish I lived inside the trunk of my car

 

[Rylvan]

Granted, you get rear-ended by an 18-wheeler.

I wish I was a werewolf.

 

[greenrage36]

Granted, how's that job at the silver factory workin' out for ya?




I wish I had an 'S' printed on all of my shirts

 

[Rylvan]

Granted, it's hot pink with glitter and rhinestones.

I wish I could lose about 50 lbs.

 

[greenrage36]

Granted, the men in black come to your place and confiscate your laptop, microwave, and a box of your comics...all in all about 50 lbs right there!



I wish I had a new set of tires

 

[Rylvan]

Granted, have fun with your new space shuttle tires. (P.S. - The Feds might come looking.)

I wish for a Chapters/Indigo/Coles gift card.

 

[greenrage36]

Granted, upon receiving it you are so happy and grateful you accidentally set it down on a hot rangetop and it goes up in flames.



I wish I could roast a marshmallow over your newly-created fire...

 

[Rylvan]

Granted, but it tastes like my now burned up Chapters gift card.

I wish I had the rest of your marshmallows.

 

[Sensi]

You have them but so do the ants.

I wish you could tell me a nice song to listen to right now.

 

[greenrage36]

Granted, Angel of Death by Slayer is now queued up for ya! (dang near a Hallmark moment if I do say so myself...)


I wish I could see you headbanging and tearing s*** up...lol.

 

[Sensi]

Ok lol You will see me doing that BUT it will be your stuff I will be tearing up :P

I wish for a really happy and energetic weekend

 

[greenrage36]

Granted, however the energetic part is supplied by a down power-line and now you are headbanging regardless of Slayer playing or not...




I wish I had a blackout

 

[NHawk19]

granted you have been dipped in a vat of black paint and are totally blacked out.


I wish to bump old threads

 

[Sensi]

You can but unfortunately no one will post with you

I wish to go on a vacation to the mountains.

 

[NHawk19]

you do but so does everyone else and they crowd you the whole time.


I wish for some more coffee

 

[Sensi]

You get it but it is old and taste very bitter

I wish for the diner to have a post count.

 

[greenrage36]

Granted...unfortunately they have a negative effect and actually cause folks to LOSE a number each time a post is made...egads!!




I wish more people said "Egads!" in times of crisis.