New study says soda causes cancer uh WTF?

[Shemtov]

Dihydrogen monoxide also causes cancer.

Not only that, but it's also known as hydroxic acid, a major constituent of acid rain, and it contributes to the Greenhouse Effect, and accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals. It is fatal if inhaled, and may cause burns by skin contact.

 

[Immortalfire]

Oh noes, I had a Coke today. I can feel death creeping up any second now.

 

[Ultra Lantern]

We're all going to die.SSH gives you Cancer.

 

[Spider-Vader]

Well, I'm boned then.

 

[WildcatNC]

I have Diabetes, and I Find "Diabeetus" too be mildly offensive.

 

[Cunning Stunts]

I was just watching "Up to the Minute" on CBS and they had a story on a study done by the FDA and they are saying that dark colored soft drinks cause cancer. Um, I'm sorry, but does everything cause cancer now a days? This paranoia is becoming seriously aggravating and is becoming ridiculous. In a world where everything causes cancer nothing causes cancer. Its the same way if everyone is special then no one is special. If everything causes cancer then cancer is not a disease, it is just a way of life. They came to this conclusion by this evidence and I quote: "In the lab, the chemicals in caramel coloring in these sodas caused cancer in some animals so we have to assume it causes it in humans." Assuming makes an ass out of you and me. Chocolate in large enough quantities will kill a dog, but am I too assume it is deadly to all humans? No, that would be ignorant. So why are these "scientists" feeding the fire of paranoia. Now the FDA is calling for these drinks to be taken off the market if they refuse to remove the coloring, and California wants a warning on dark sodas that they may cause cancer! Come on , people, use common sense. People today are terrified of cancer and what might cause it, we don't need to give them another thing to fear.

Here is a link to the story:http://abcnews.go.com/Health/cspi-caramel-coloring-cola-cancer-soft-drink-industry/story?id=12932008

I'd actually heard of studies (and possibly conclusions) like this being done a few years ago. The most prevalent "excuse" to pull soda is that aspartame, the artificial sweetener that's in diet sodas, causes cancer. I've also read that it causes you to make up what calories you don't take in by drinking a diet soda (and then some) by cravings for sweetened things caused by the aspartame. That I could see, having worked at a concession stand before.

Can't really tell if someone has cancer that way, though.

 

[Tacit Ronin]

EVERYTHING causes cancer.

 

[E-Man]

EVERYTHING causes cancer.

Except sex and barbecue, and that's why I am so fond of both.

 

[CelticPredator]

hahaha...funniest post all day...

 

[Ultra Lantern]

If you're reading this,you have Cancer.

 

[Spidey-Bat]

Except sex and barbecue, and that's why I am so fond of both.

There's AIDS for that one.

 

[ALP]

Breaking news: soda is bad for you.

Next, astronauts land on the moon. More at 10!

Don't tell anyone...but I hear Annie Hall is going to beat Star Wars for best picture.

Except sex and barbecue, and that's why I am so fond of both.

Didn't you read the last page? Sex DOES cause cancer.

 

[Danalys]

who would have ever guessed that gluttony might be bad for you.

 

[CelticPredator]

^ Drinking soda isnt gluttony....


Health freaks make me said. And there's a difference between a healthy person, and a healthy freak who rants and raves at people for drinking a soda...OMG!

 

[Danalys]

you ever read the results of that twinkie diet experiment? if not you don't know where i'm coming from. presuming me the things you have is quite unwarranted.

 

[CelticPredator]

I dont know, nor do I care. Drinking a soda or 2 a day wont kill you.

 

[Danalys]

most things kill you just slowly.

 

[The Guard]

This reminds me of...

TV: Beer causes cirrhosis of the liver and cancer of the rectum.

HOMER: Mmm...beer.

 

[Shemtov]

most things kill you just slowly.

Everything is a poison in excess.

 

[hopefuldreamer]

NEWS Flash:
Living causes cancer.
Professor Abe V. Ouse, of Axiomatic University, said "Studies have found that living people have 100% more chance getting cancer then dead people. In fact, there have been no reported cases of a Dead Person Getting Cancer. Being Dead seems to give you immunity too cancer. If you want too avoid this terrible disease, it is recommended that you become dead."


Note: This is all satire. Don't "Become dead" This whole thing is a joke.

 

[wiegeabo]

NEWS Flash:
Living causes cancer.
Professor Abe V. Ouse, of Axiomatic University, said "Studies have found that living people have 100% more chance getting cancer then dead people. In fact, there have been no reported cases of a Dead Person Getting Cancer. Being Dead seems to give you immunity too cancer. If you want too avoid this terrible disease, it is recommended that you become dead."


Note: This is all satire. Don't "Become dead" This whole thing is a joke.

Another reason the zombie apocalypse is unavoidable. They'll be the only ones around.

 

[Ultra Lantern]

In the future the zombies will rule everywhere.They all died of Cancer.

 

[wiegeabo]

I remember a couple of years back studies were saying that carbonation contributed to throat cancer.

 

[Danalys]

Everything is a poison in excess.

which is why moderation is good and far from greed and gluttony.

 

[CelticPredator]

I'm glad i'm commiting sin by drinking soda.