The Original Bamfer
Big, Bald and Beautiful
- Joined
- Feb 16, 2003
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Ah, Matt; alienating people since 2000. 

Ah, Matt; alienating people since 2000.![]()
I wanted my first Recast to be a tribute to the true oldbies of the Hype and what better movie to pay respect to the old timers than.....
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THE EXPENDABLES
Starring only 2Ker Hype Members
Barney Ross (Sylvester Stallone): Scarlet Spidey - Barney was quiet, enjoyed his friends, just searching for his place. SS was the same way on the Hype.
Lee Christmas (Jason Statham): Kevin Roegele - British-ness aside, anyone who knows Kev can see it.
Yin Yang (Jet Li): echostation - Echo loved Asian culture (and may have been Asian) if memory serves. Therefore who better to play Asia's premiere action star?
Gunnar Jensen (Dolph Lundgren): PALADIN - Kinda went bat **** crazy in his later years.
Toll Road (Randy Couture): Matt - I used to box at an amateur level, Couture is a prize fighter of sorts, it fit.
Hale Caesar (Terry Crews): DACrowe - Crowe is kind of the forgotten 2Ker, he's still around and he is still great. He is a solid member who doesn't get much credit, much like Crews. Plus, Crews/Crowe, it fit.
Tool (Mickey Rourke): GreenGoblin - The first of the great oldbies to retire, much like Rourke's character in the film.
James Munroe (Eric Roberts): Danger Mouse - The corrupt government official kinda fit following Tovengate.
Dan Paine (Stone Cold Steve Austin): Slinger - We're both TV forumers, probably two of the most prominent (definitely were back in the day), so it makes sense that we duke it out in the end like Paine did with the Couture character.
The Brit (Gary Daniels): Spider-Man UK - Both have names that are related to the British Empire.
Sandra Garza (Gisele Itie): Honey Vibe - One of two females that joined SHH in 2000. Her personality fit the character better than Webmistress.
General Garza (David Zayas): Bakerboy (Yes, he is a 2K1er, but Zayas didn't really fit with the rest of the cast either, and no 2Kers were crazy, obsessed, psychopathic Spanish speakers)
Lacy (Charisma Carpenter): Webmistress - The only remaining female.
Garza's Bodyguard (Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira): Master Yoda - Okay, he doesn't fit but a 2K casting wouldn't work without Yoda.
Somali Pirate Boss (Amin Joseph): The Amazing Spider-Man/Iceman
Tall Somali Pirate (Senyo Amoaku): AmazingFantasy15
These two both had Amazing in the name, so I figured it gave them a theme since they were both Somali pirates. The leader was cocky, outspoken, and brash, as was the Subzero Hero (but in a good way) so I made him the boss.
Mr. Church (Bruce Willis): Themanofbat
Trent Mauser (Arnold Schwarzenegger): The Lizard
These two are the two Hype Time Achievement Award winners from 2K, therefore it made sense that they play the legendary action movie actor characters.
All of the roles listed are those listed on the Wikipedia page for The Expendables.t:
You just plug any random Community member into a role,
I hardy do anything like that, I too put much thought into my recasts.
Hawkeye- BizarroAids
My dad is Captain Marvel and my mom's a skrull princess! SWEET!
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Eric Roberts is going to be pissed when he reads my post.
But since you gave me such a good opportunity, I think I shall do some alienating....people of the recast thread....for the most part, your recasts suck! You just plug any random Community member into a role, regardless of if they fit! Marx is no Picard, JP is not Xavier (far too combative, if anything he should be Magneto).
I spent an hour thinking up rationals for each cast member of The Expendables (viewable below)! Do you know how ****ing hard it is to analyze the characterization of The ****ing Expendables? But I did it as a labor of love! I urge you to do the same!
See? Ration behind the choices! Anal retentive ration! Use it! Especially you Johnny Drama! In one of your castings I am Geppetto, in another I am Reverend Lovejoy! They are completely contradictory characters! One is a joyless, sarcastic jerk, the other is a kind, loving family man! Which is it!?! Use logic damn it!![]()
Xavier in 'First Class' is an arrogant, sarcastic, alcohol-loving "sex fiend". I probably know JP better than almost anyone else here. I stick behind that casting.![]()
See? Ration behind the choices! Anal retentive ration! Use it! Especially you Johnny Drama! In one of your castings I am Geppetto, in another I am Reverend Lovejoy! They are completely contradictory characters! One is a joyless, sarcastic jerk, the other is a kind, loving family man! Which is it!?! Use logic damn it!![]()
Well in that case I suppose you are a joyless, sarcastic jerk but you also can't deny your creepy "strange old man with candy in his van" vibe you have going. And nothing says "Sexy grandpa" like Gipetto.![]()
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thor
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/thor_(film)#cast
muthaf******samuel l. Jacksonnick fury- e-man
*if you don't know what i'm talking about then watch some conan.
Thor's dubbed voice- JP*
*If you don't know what i'm talking about then watch some Conan.
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Zeke Tyler- Darthphere
Casey Connor- Spider-Fan
Delilah Profitt- NotAhenchWench
Stokely 'Stokes' Mitchell- Star
Marybeth Louise Hutchinson- ComicChick
Stan Rosado- Hush
Nurse Rosa Harper- DBella
Miss Elizabeth Burke- Alexia Dark
Mrs. Karen Olson- Squeekness
Principal Valerie Drake- Dew K. Mosi
Professor Furlong- SuperFerret
Coach Joe Willis- C.Lee
Mr. John Connor- Hunter Rider
Gabe Santora- E-Man
Mr. Tate- Abbadon
Since I'm on a role (see the terrible pun?)/have insomnia I give you my next recast!!!!
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Jeff Winger: Erzengel
Britta Perry: AndthePickles
Annie Edison: Sensi
Abid Nadir: Spider-Fan
Troy Barnes: Colossal Spoons
Shirley Bennett: Kel
Pierce Hawthorne: C. Lee
Senor Chang: Matt
Dean Pelton: JP
Professor Duncan: Hunter Rider
Leonard: Superman
Vaughn: Kane52630
Starburns: Catman (they're both creepy, anyhow)
The Greendale Human Being: TEDDY