"Thriller" belongs in "Slither", NOT "13 Going on 30"

AS a die-hard Michael Jackson fan, I have a complain:

why the hell was "Thriller", a HORROR song, used in "13 Going on 30"?

There was nothing scary about that movie except for Jennifer Garner's acting. It was NOT a horror movie. It was a gender-reversed version of "Big", which was NOT a horror movie.

Wouldn't this be more fitting in "Slither", the self-proclaimed scariest and greatest of all horror movies?

I mean, just check the lyrics (boldfaced are the most poignant ones):

It's close to midnight and something evil's lurking in the dark
Under the moonlight you see a sight that almost stops your heart
You try to scream but terror takes the sound before you make it
You start to freeze as horror looks you right between the eyes
You're paralyzed

'Cause this is thriller, thriller night
And no one's gonna save you from the beast about to strike
You know it's thriller, thriller night
You're fighting for your life inside a killer
Thriller tonight

You hear the door slam and realize there's nowhere left to run
You feel the cold hand and wonder if you'll ever see the sun
You close your eyes and hope that this is just imagination
But all the while you hear the creature creepin' up behind
You're out of time

'Cause this is thriller, thriller night
There ain't no second chance against the thing with forty eyes
You know it's thriller, thriller night
You're fighting for your life inside a killer
Thriller tonight

Night creatures call
And the dead start to walk in their masquerade
There's no escapin' the jaws of the alien this time
They're open wide
This is the end of your life


They're out to get you, there's demons closing in on every side
They will possess you unless you change the number on your dial
Now is the time for you and I to cuddle close together
All thru the night I'll save you from the terrors on the screen
I'll make you see

That it's a thriller, thriller night
'Cause I can thrill you more than any ghost would dare to try
Girl, this is thriller, thriller night
So let me hold you tight and share a killer, chiller
Thriller here tonight

'Cause this is thriller, thriller night
And no one's gonna save you from the beast about to strike
You know it's thriller, thriller night
You're fighting for your life inside a killer
Thriller tonight

And if are STILL not convinced that this belongs in a horror movie, just check this:

Darkness falls across the land
The midnite hour is close at hand
Creatures crawl in search of blood
To terrorize y'awl's neighborhood
And whosoever shall be found
Without the soul for getting down
Must stand and face the hounds of hell
And rot inside a corpse's shell

The foulest stench is in the air
The funk of forty thousand years
And grizzly ghouls from every tomb
Are closing in to seal your doom
And though you fight to stay alive
Your body starts to shiver
For no mere mortal can resist
The evil of the thriller

So, bottom line: this has NO BUSSINESS being in a Jennifer Garner comedy.

 

Well:

Don't Care What You Talkin'
'Bout Baby
I Don't Care What You Say
Don't You Come Walkin'
Beggin' Back Mama
I Don't Care Anyway
Time After Time I Gave You All Of My Money
No Excuses To Make
Ain't No Mountain That I
Can't Climb Baby
All Is Going My Way

('Cause There's A Time When
You're Right)
(And You Know You Must
Fight)
Who's Laughing Baby, Don't
You Know
(And There's The Choice That
We Make)
(And This Choice You Will
Take)
Who's Laughin' Baby

So Just Leave Me Alone
Leave Me Alone
(Leave Me Alone)
(Leave Me Alone)
Leave Me Alone
(Leave Me Alone)
(Leave Me Alone)
(Leave Me Alone)
Leave Me Alone-Stop It!
Just Stop Doggin' Me Around
(Just Stop Doggin' Me)

There Was A Time I Used To
Say Girl I Need You
But Who Is Sorry Now
You Really Hurt, You Used To
Take And Deceive Me
Now Who Is Sorry Now
You Got A Way Of Making Me
Feel So Sorry
I Found Out Right Away
Don't You Come Walkin'-
Beggin' I Ain't Lovin' You
Don't You Get In My Way
'Cause
(There's A Time When You're
Right)
(And You Know You Must
Fight)
Who's Laughing Baby-Don't
You Know?
(And There's The Choice That
We Make)
(And This Choice You Will
Take)
Who's Laughin' Baby?

So Just Leave Me Alone
Leave Me Alone
(Leave Me Alone)
(Leave Me Alone)
Leave Me Alone
Leave Me Alone
(Leave Me Alone)
(Leave Me Alone)
(Leave Me Alone)
Stop It!
Just Stop Doggin' Me Around
(Just Stop Doggin' Me)

('Cause There's A Time When
You're Right)
(And You Know You Must
Fight)
Who's Laughing Baby, Don't
You Know, Girl
(It's The Choice That We
Make)
(And This Choice You Will
Take)
Who's Laughin' Baby

So Just Leave Me Alone
Leave Me Alone
(Leave Me Alone)
(Leave Me Alone)
Leave Me Alone
Leave Me Alone
(Leave Me Alone)
(Leave Me Alone)
(Leave Me Alone)
Stop It!
Just Stop Doggin' Me Around
Leave Me Alone
Leave Me Alone
(Leave Me Alone)
(Leave Me Alone)
Leave Me Alone
(Leave Me Alone)
Leave Me Alone-Stop It!

Just Stop Doggin' Me Around
(Just Stop Doggin' Me)
Don't Come Beggin' Me
Don't Come Beggin'
Don't Come Lovin' Me
Don't Come Beggin'
I Love You
I Don't Want It
I Don't . . .
I Don't . . .
I Don't . . .
I . . .I . . ., Aaow!
Hee Hee!
Don't Come Beggin' Me
Don't Come Beggin'
Don't Come Lovin' Me
Don't Come Beggin'
I Love You
I Don't Want It
I Don't Need It

 

Toungue-in-cheek horror is still horror. Or wouldn't you cal Evil Dead 2 a horror movie?

I STILL don't know what horrore has to do with "13 Going on 30".

 

There are A LOT of good songs from the '80s, why pick the very one that DOESN'T belong in the movie?

 

Namre one, just ONE, horror or otherwise blood-soaked moment about "13 Going on 30".

Just one.