Round One: Tobey Maguire tries to take a few swings at Rino Romano, but soon discovers that trying to punch paper is a lot harder than it looks, so he takes on the one other Spider-Man with any mass, Neil Patrick Harris. Christopher Daniel charges Dan Gilvezan, but soon discovers he's unable to punch anything for some reason. Dan lays Christopher down in one bunch.
Round Two: Rino squares off against Dan, employing a variety of sonic weapons and stingers, which hit Dan, but Dan simply shrugs them off. Meanwhile, both Tobey and Neil have ripped apart each other's costumes. Tobey realizes that he doesn't know how to defeat someone in a fight, since everyone he's come across just sort of killed themselves. "Oh, my back," moans Tobey, who slinks away.
Round Three: Dan and Neil double team Rino, and manage to kick him into a portal that just happened to show up.
Round Four: Dan and Neil shake hands in mutuel respect for each other, and continue the fight. Ultimatly, Neil is just too fast and slippery for Dan's cheap animated punches, and Dan collapses.
Winner: Doogie Howser
