Cave monster killed in Panama!

[SuperT]

Gollum Found Dead in Panama
By Hamilton Nolan, 10:40 AM on Thu Sep 17 2009, 10,821 views

Pretty quiet summer monster season this year, right? Wrong, mi amigo. A distant cousin of the Montauk Monster emerged from its cave in Panama. Then terrified kids beat it to death.

According to reports in Panama, the teenagers spotted the creature crawling out of a cave while playing in the town of Cerro Azul north of Panama City.
Fearing for the safety as it moved towards them, the youths claim they attacked the beast with sticks before throwing its lifeless body into a pool of water.

All it wanted was to play with the children. And now this. A sad statement on our fear of the unknown.

But at least our new friend will leave a legacy. As Telemetro noted in the original (translated) report, "while some say it may be a being from another planet, others simply believe that is an animal."

Some say it's a sloth. We say: It's a lost friend.

http://gawker.com/5361602/cave-monster-killed-in-panama

What is it?!?!?!

 

[WompuM]

E.T.!!!!!!

no. NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[The Lizard]

Drowned sloth with all the hair fallen out, I'm guessing.


Or maybe the baby from Eraserhead all grown up...

 

[Venom 1988]

Poor guy never stood a chance...

 

[ObakeTora]

****ing kids.

 

[Majic Walrus]

I know what it is. Dead and ****ing gross too.

 

[Drakon]

Damn meddling kids and their talking dog and their Don Knots. They finally find a real ghost and they kill it. It's not like it was Old Man Corrouthers under there.

 

[craigdbfan]

Defintely a hairless sloth. Poor thing.

Sloths are incredibly docile and friendly the thing probably had its death clock ticking pretty close to noon anyway. My guess it had some degenerative hair loss disease.

Also take a look at its hands it has the exact claws of a sloth.

Heres pictures of a normal one:

 

[BillyZaned]

Probably a sloth... hook hands

 

[BillyZaned]

Defintely a hairless sloth. Poor thing.

Sloths are incredibly docile and friendly the thing probably had its death clock ticking pretty close to noon anyway. My guess it had some degenerative hair loss disease.

Also take a look at its hands it has the exact claws of a sloth.

Heres pictures of a normal one:

wouldn't call it a "poor thing"... don't blame those kids one bit... your outside, and that thing comes at you... I'm curb stomping it....

 

[craigdbfan]

Um do you realize how slow these creatures are?

You can easily walk away without it ever reaching you. Beating it to death seems a bit senseless.

Of course its a poor thing, sloths are extremely docile it had not intent in hurting those kids.

 

[VenomVsSpidey]

 

[Darthphere]

**** you Bilbo Baggins!

 

[SuperFerret]

wouldn't call it a "poor thing"... don't blame those kids one bit... your outside, and that thing comes at you... I'm curb stomping it....

You need to learn that no matter what happens, if teenagers are involved, it's their fault.

And there's really no excuse to kill a sloth. Ever.

 

[Aesop Rocks]

It's a hairless cave monster. Duh.

 

[BillyZaned]

You need to learn that no matter what happens, if teenagers are involved, it's their fault.

And there's really no excuse to kill a sloth. Ever.

what if it's eating all the Baby Ruth bars... then what... huh??? it's dead

 

[SuperFerret]

Well, since chocolate is poisonous and sloths typically have very specific diets, I'd say yes, it'll die shortly afterwards.

I know you were making a Goonies joke, I just derive pleasure from denying you that satisfaction.

 

[craigdbfan]

^^Sloths everywhere approve the above message.

 

[CelticPredator]

They killed Lindsay Lohan! :horror:

 

[Mike_D202]

Why is it's skin pink, but a regular sloth's skin looks black?

 

[WompuM]

I hope, one day, there will be a cryptic corpse that really is something unidentified. I thought it was gonna be Montauk for sure, but that was just a raccoon.

 

[Kirmit]

Mankind's fear of the unknown claims another victim .

 

[chaseter]

HAHA I love how this thing is hanging out smack dab in the middle of a damn road and it is smiling to take a picture.

 

[Majic Walrus]

I doubt the kids killed it no matter what the scenario. It probably drowned a long time before the kids found it.

 

[terry78]

If a sloth ever gets close enough to injure you with its claws, you deserve to be cut with a knife two more times for being that ****ing lazy.