Corrupt A Wish - Part 2

Granted but you get robbed and the culprit is never found.

I wish I could remember my Japanese vocabulary.
 
Granted, but you just ran an old person over in your ride - best put that money towards your court costs now...


I wish I never have that happen to me!
 
Granted but something even worse happens.

I wish I was better at mathematics.
 
Granted, now you have "A Beautiful Mind" and are completely insane.

I wish I had a boat.
 
Granted, but Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly will stay on it forever singing "Boats n' H***"

I wish I could change my height at will.
 
Yep, but not proportionally. you will look like on one of those circus mirrors every time you morph.

I wish I looked more muscular.
 
Granted, but you look like Strong Guy:
strongguy.jpg


I wish I had Superman's vision powers.
 
Granted, but the X-rays only work on your mother and the lasers just kind of heat things up slowly, like a defroster.


I wish I could sing very well.
 
Granted, but you'll have a girlie voice like Justin Bieber.



I wish I could be in high school again.
 
Granted, but you're gonna be the kid no one wants to talk to.

I wish my skeletal system was made out of adamantium.
 
Granted. However, whenever you stub your toe, bump your elbow, or fall down, the bones push right through the muscles and cut open your skin. You forever have to wear a suit similar to the ones they use as the "attacker" in women's self defense classes.

I wish for an uncorruptable wish.
 
Granted,Satan now has your soul.

I wish I had a magical sexy genie.
 
Granted, but her name is just Magical Sexy Genie (She's a Stripper) and she has no magical powers.....also, she's a lesbian.



I wish I invented Velcro.
 
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Granted, but now you stick to absolutely everything.


I wish I had a book deal.
 
Granted...now get out there and start selling encyclopedia's door-to-door!! (boots him in the hiney)




I wish my hangover would leave me and soon...ai-yi-yi...:barf:
 
Granted, but you still got bummed by a tranny stripper.


I wish I didn't have to shower and always smelled like cookies.
 
Granted...uh..you DID mention 4-year old stale cookies right? You DIDN'T..oh..uh...oops....




I wish I could get a massage in the next half-hour or so...
 
Granted,you get massaged by Charlie Sheen.

I wish I was very famous.
 
Granted. You're very famous for being murdered by Charlie Sheen with breast implants ripped from a Goddess' chest.


I wish I had some donuts.
 
Granted..you wake up next morning to find 'em ring-around your weenie...


*btw..did that bastard Sheen finish my massage yet?? :cmad:


I wish he would have stuck around to finish the job, da**it!!!
 
Granted,you're now on a drug called Charlie Sheen.

I wish I had a T-Bone steak.
 
Granted, but it's got waaay too much floor sauce.....and spit.....and pubic hair......yeah that works. :o


I wish I had a pair of shoes that let me walk up walls.
 
Granted..but they were issued with a pair of socks which expel the wearer at random times...have a nice landing! :word:


I wish I had some fries..like..right now!!
 
You will. But it'll be Victor Fries, then he'll turn into Mr. Freeze, then he'll freeze you alive while spouting things in an Arnold accent.

I wish I was more likable.
 

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