Corrupt A Wish - Part 2

[Ultra Lantern]

Granted,I come by and cut your tongue off.

I wish I had a super computer.

 

[Anubis]

Granted, it crashes in the middle of downloading Ultra Porn.


I wish there really was Ultra Porn.

 

[greenrage36]

Granted, but because its so Ultra your hormones would explode if you even watched one second of it..


I wish I could send an e-mail with an Ultra Porn attachment..

 

[Anubis]

Granted, but the police track you down for distribution of Ultra Porn and and murder!



I wish knew what would happen if a Horse got bitten by a Werewolf.

 

[PSYLENTGuardian]

Granted, but whatever the horse turns into tries to kill you.

I wish my dog could talk.

 

[Anubis]

Granted, he informs you that he doesn't like you very much.



I wish my enemies would get worms.

 

[Spidermatrix53]

Granted, but now they come over daily to scratch their asses on your carpet.


I wish I had a good Pina Coloda right now.

 

[Duke]

Granted, but its laced with cynaide.



I wish I had Superman's powers.

 

[Lord]

Granted, You are sent to the Phamtom Zone.

I wish smallville had a sequel as a new tv series.

 

[Duke]

Granted, only to be cancelled in less than a season.




I wish the G.I.Joe organization was real.

 

[Ultra Lantern]

Granted,they recruit you and you die in your very first mission.

I wish I was on American Idol.

 

[Duke]

Granted, but you'll sing like a girly man & cry off the stage





I wish I owned a 2012 truck

 

[Ultra Lantern]

Granted,but when you drive away with it,a semi crashes into you and totals your new truck.

I wish I was President of the United States.

 

[Duke]

Granted, you'll be assasinated on the day of your inauguration.



I wish if I uttered the name Shazam, I'd be transformed into Capt. Marvel.

 

[greenrage36]

Granted, and by Captain Marvel I mean you turn into the Big Red Cheese......and by Big Red Cheese, I mean you turn into a gigantic pile of glowing red Swiss...


I wish I had some crackers to go with that big ol' pile of red cheese!

 

[PSYLENTGuardian]

Granted, but then I take away the crackers and melt your red cheese into a boiling hot pool.

I wish I possessed the power of Thor and that I'm not just a good soldier, but a good man.

 

[Sensi]

You will be all of that but no one will care. You will be so yesterday

I wish I had a close friend.

 

[greenrage36]

Granted!

*You sound kinda bummed out so I won't corrupt this one - unless you really want me to...and pay me money...and maybe if you get me a donut as well...yeah..skip the money I'll just take the donut..mmmmmm..donut!*


I wish Sensi didn't sound so sad in that last post...

 

[Spidermatrix53]

Granted! I took it as sarcasm!


I wish I had unlimited credit on PSN.

 

[Anubis]

Granted, but after you buy anything on the PSN, the PS3 you're using will automatically suffer the red light of death.


I wish I didn't have to ever pay taxes on anything with zero consequence from the Government.

 

[PSYLENTGuardian]

Granted, but a crazed man out for justice murders you for not paying your taxes.

I wish my handwriting was beautiful.

 

[Anubis]

Granted, but everything you write will always be spelled wrong.


I wish I had one of them cool smart phones.

 

[Duke]

Granted, but after you use it too much you develop terminal brain cancer.




I wish I could go on vacation (all expenses paid) for 1 year.

 

[Anubis]

Granted, but it's to Tijuana, Mexico.


I wish I didn't bang that stripper the last time I went to Tijuana.

 

[PSYLENTGuardian]

Granted, you didn't bang that stripper, you went ahead to bang another one.

I wish I could harness energy.