Loki (The Reigning) (DU):
1 2 (Dr. Strange's
spells, tools, and records are also available to this version.)
Thor (w/ Power Cosmic) (MU):
1 2, Mjolnir:
1 2 (Add to any mention of his powers internalized flight and the standard energy projection abilities common to Power Cosmic wielders.)
Byakko (DM):
1
Ambrose Chase (DR):
1 2 3 4
Black Knight (Dane Whitman) (MR):
1 2 3
Prep Time
The Punkasses flash into existence before a huge mansion.
"This dwelling..." Thor wonders, "is it the Avengers' estate?"
"Not quite, Thor," Dane answers. "I'd recognize Tony's mansion anywhere. This one's definitely close in size, but it's not Avengers Mansion. Whoever it does belong to must really be loaded, though."
"It is Wayne Manor," Byakko informs them. "Even one of simple means such as I knows of Bruce Wayne, the multi-billionaire businessman, and his home, the site of many infamous
'encounters,' if the media is to be believed."
"Weird," Ambrose notes. "We've been through secret government bases and frozen wastelands, but now we get dropped into the middle of some rich guy's lawn? It doesn't add up. There's gotta be something more to this place if it follows the pattern of our previous battlegrounds."
"Who says there even
is a pattern, Ambrose?"
"Trust me, Dane: you look hard enough, you'll find that there's
always a pattern."
"Well, let's have a look inside and see if--"
"Nay! It cannot be!" The Punkasses turn to find Thor looking at Loki as if he's seen a ghost. "Base villain! How did you survive Galactus' insatiable hunger?"
"I know not of what you speak, brother," Loki replies, perplexed. "I fear there may be some misunderstanding... the devourer has not visited Asgard in centuries."
"I say thee nay!" Thor's face turns into a scowl. "More of your lies, trickster! You mean to confound me for some dark purpose. Tell me what I wish to know, or I shall strike you down again in such a way that you shall ne'er return!"
Loki sighs with exasperation. "You always were a wool-headed idiot. Clearly something is not right with this picture. According to you I am dead--slain by Galactus, of all beings--but obviously that is not the case. Meanwhile,
you appear centuries younger and are dressed in raiment the likes of which I have ne'er seen you wear."
Thor opens his mouth for another shout, but thinks on Loki's words and purses his lips. Finally, he says, "Muspelheim itself must have frozen over, for I do believe I hear the ring of truth in your words, stepbrother. Your visage does appear grayed with age, and you have come to possess artifacts once in the care of Midgard's Doctor Strange. How came these things to pass?"
"All-seeing Odin was slain in battle against Surtur and you took the throne. You were unable to let go of your love for the mortals and Midgard, however; you tried to help them and they brought Asgard's golden halls crashing down as thanks. 'Twas then that you realized that the humans must be cared for and led to greatness by their betters--us, the gods whom they had worshipped for centuries before. You remade the world in your image and appointed me with the supervision of man's security--a task to which I humbly say I have taken to with great aplomb. I am your most loyal and trusted aide. Together, we have transformed Midgard into the paradise that is New Asgard!"
"Nay... I say thee nay! Such a tale must be a flight of pure fancy. Ne'er would I seek to reign over the mortals whom I had so come to care for, and e'en less likely is it that I would appoint a snake such as you as chief supervisor of their fate!"
"Be that as it may, I have recounted my world's history honestly! What of you, thunderer? You were ever the mightiest of the gods, but how came you to possess power such as that which I sense in you now? 'Tis foreign to Asgard's golden streets... in fact, I have only sensed it in one other--the Silver Surfer, herald to the Devourer whom you have mentioned before. What, then, is your tale?"
"You are correct... the power you sense is the Power Cosmic, bestowed on me by Galactus. He came to the realm eternal and began a siege unlike any the giants of Jotunheim could muster--verily, e'en Surtur himself could not have displayed the cold, calculating efficiency and power of the devourer of worlds. Though I defeated Galactus' herald in combat, Asgard lay on the verge of extinction; but Galactus declared he was sated enough to search for a more suitable world, on the condition that I come with him as his new herald. I knew the golden realm could not withstand anymore punishment so I accepted, and Galactus was true to his word. Until
you led an assault that finally conquered Asgard. I learned of it from Muninn and broke my agreement with Galactus to help free Asgard. For my defiance Galactus returned to Asgard and destroyed it completely. Balder led the survivors of your attack to safe haven on Midgard, but you... you I watched burn within Asgard with a smile on my lips."
"Your story is tragic, dear brother, but flawed nonetheless. 'Twas not
I who did these things."
"But you
would! In this and every other reality, Loki, you are vile and untrustworthy--a traitor to Asgard in all ways! Only Odin's infinite patience and misguided love for you has spared you." Thor grabs Loki's throat. "But perhaps I should remedy the All-Father's oversight."
"Oooookay there, big guy," the Black Knight says, stepping up to Thor, "I think that's en--"
"Begone, mortal! This is a matter for gods; you have no place here!"
"Aye, Whitman, beware. This Thor is not the bastion of honor and righteousness you know; he may well strike you down if you interfere further."
"Nay, I did not mean--"
"Oh, no? But is that not what you do, in service to Galactus, thunderer? Murder mortals by the planetful?"
"I choose planets filled with the unjust--with those who would lord their power over others!"
"Just as you lord your power over them?"
"I--!"
"Go on then, murderer! Carry out your task! Kill me, though I be loyal to your dimensional counterpart--king of all Asgard
and Midgard, successor to Odin, infinite in his wisdom--merely for being the counterpart of your betrayer."
Thor's hand tightens around Loki's neck. "He's right, you know," Dane says. Thor shoots him a look of fury mixed with doubt. "Easy. I know, affairs of the gods and all, but I've fought alongside you guys in Asgard itself. I think I've earned the right to be heard." Some of the anger drains from Thor's eyes. "He
is right. If you kill him now, you'll be no better than he is--well, your him was... you get what I mean."
Thor loosens his grip and lets Loki drop. "Aye, I do, friend Dane. Come, let us fight this battle and be done with it. I can bear to look at him no more, and if I must do so much longer, I fear I may do things that will make me unable to look at myself."
The Punkasses enter the huge mansion before them and scout it out. It appears to be a normal--albeit huge and extravagantly decorated--home. Then Loki summons the others' attention and they meet him by an old grandfather clock.
"I have used the Eye of Agamotto to scan the premises. It appears there is some sort of secret passage behind this clock." He pulls down on the pendulum and the clock slides to the side, revealing a doorway. The Punkasses head down the stairs and Byakko gasps. "What is it, phantasm?"
"I have heard of this place. This is the cave of Batman. He and Bruce Wayne... they are one and the same!"
"'Batman,' huh? Never heard of him." Dane continues down the stairs. "Well? You guys just gonna stand there, or are we gonna raid his stuff?"
The Punkasses look through the Batcave's weapons and technology, but before long the gargantuan screen of the main terminal flashes on and their opponents appear on it. The Black Knight and Thor inform the others of the Silver Surfer, the Vision, and Proctor, but Byakko can only give them broad information on Dr. Fate and even less on Deadline. The Punkasses take what information they have and work out their plans...
).
