Fan Fiction Help: Potter, Artemis, Wrinkle in Time, Unfortunate Events, etc. etc.

I'm working on this Valentines Day gift for this girl. She really likes Artemis Fowl, Harry Potter, Series of Unfortunate Events, A Wrinkle in Time, the Incredibles, and Meet the Robinsons. I'm someone who loves writing and reading, so I did my best to read what I could. But naturally I do not have enough time to read all the Potters and the Unfortunate Events. So my question is this: Could you guys help me come up with a plot that incorporates all of these in an original way? Crazy wacky simply out of the box ideas would help. I don't really want a cliche or predictable plot. So I'm most likely going to merge several ideas.

My idea is for it to take place AFTER the last books of all the series.

Secondly, could you give me your take on...
Who is Harry Potter?
Who is Artemis Fowl?
Who is Count Oluf?
What's your take on the characters of A Wrinkle in Time?

Thanks!

 

Thanks for your input and encouragement. Yeah, I could wiki it all, but that's why I'm wondering what the fans think. Wiki is just facts, been there done that.

Okay, here's an idea I have, what do you think...

Story starts out with Dash from The Incredibles being chased by someone, he is now in his mid teens. He is then either killled or captured, not sure yet. Cut to narrator narrating how things are not right in the world, how children who are aging discover a world harsher than the one they grew up in. We then cut to a court room. Artemis Fowl is on trial. Now that he is 18 years old, he has been, amazingly, caught by the police and is being tried as an adult. He thinks back on the events that got him there. The police raided his mansion with robots beyond his imagination. Butler takes them on, but he gets the crap beaten out of him. Artemis calles the LEPrecons, but is unable to contact them. The police then grab him and tell him they have a warrant for his arrest.
Cut back to the court room, Artemis is thrown in jail after being found guilty. Apparently someone tipped off the police and gave full video evidence of all of his dealings. The jail door closes hard on Artemis as he realizes even a child genius can run out of time. As he sits in there, a portal opens up behind him. It's Holly and she grabs him and teleports him back to teh LEP base.
Foaly tells him that they have been tracking anomalies due to wreckless time travel all over the world and they feel that Artemis is caught in all this and didn't deserve to be put in jail. "How do you know this," Artemis asks. "Is this another ploy by Opal?"
Foally shakes his head. An enigmatic figure comes out of the shadows and introduces himself as a completely new character and shows him shots of all these heroes around the world and how they must recruit them to stop the evil that is wrecking the world through changes in time.
We see Harry Potter who is now in early retirement, mainly from his baby that was born recently. He must take care of her now instead of fighting against the dark magics. Etc. Etc. Etc.

So that's what I have so far. Opinions wanted.

 

First of all, I've only never read Series of Unfortunate Events. Only read a few books of Potter and Artemis and have read Wrinkle in Time and have seen the other movies. Not to mention I'm armed with Wikipedia and all of you. I think I've got it covered.

Yeah, she reads fanfiction. She reads every spare moment she gets of whatever she can get her hands on. So she'd be up for it.

Again, I'm just looking for some story ideas you guys could throw at me. What would be something good? I flipped through some fanfiction and they tend to be pretty predictable crossover stuff. I, in all honest, want to write a good story that uses some characters rather than just slap a story together. I'm aiming at about a hundred or so pages when it's done.