Abishai100
Civilian
- Joined
- Oct 21, 2014
- Messages
- 150
- Reaction score
- 5
- Points
- 38
What I'd love comments about are two things mostly:
1. is the story well-composed (and organized)?
2. does the 'Barry Allen' Flash persona come through (even if transformed)?
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Barry Allen was a film projectionist at The Chicago Movie Theater during the Roaring Twenties who kept staring at rolling film-reel negatives in the glimmering light until it gave his brain a reflex and muscle-reactivity speed, causing him to develop a superhuman power over speed. Barry started calling himself the 'Flash' and sewed himself a nifty red acrobat's costume, intending to hit the streets of Chicago as its first super-vigilante. Crime bosses, ghouls, and wayward cops soon came to fear the Flash's presence and his ability to act very quickly before criminal activities could develop with sufficient speed.
The most frustrated character in this strange urban vigilantism drama in 1920s was the gangster Black Mask who managed an elaborate opium smuggling operation between Chicago (Illinois) and San Francisco (California). Black Mask feared the 'word-on-the-street' would be insulting nomenclature rebelliousness such as, "Black Mask is a snail compared to the Flash!" To counter this trend in Chicago 'street-culture,' Black Mask forced employees of the Chicago Herald newspaper to print special articles biased in favor of Black Mask and his opium operation, citing that the smuggling of 2nd-tier danger-drugs (especially opium) is simply not as morally dangerous as a rogue unlicensed 'vigilante' such as the Flash.
The smear campaign in the press worked for a while, and Flash suffered some morale blows, but over all, he decided that all that could be done was being done, and indeed, in time (one year), Flash's crusader-antics once again received due media attention, and the goonish crime-bosses and vandals of Chicago once again feared how he would 'dent' the 'iron-face' of their mystique with his speed-focused 'magic-exorcism.' The Flash (Barry Allen) took advantage of this special advantage to host a pirate radio show called "Anti-Mafia" which surprisingly generated a great deal of street-talk and satisfied his mission for 'urban dialogue proliferation.' Black Mask had had it; he ordered the assassination of Flash, and surprisingly, was killed by one of his own goons! Good marched over evil.
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Flash (Wikipedia)
1. is the story well-composed (and organized)?
2. does the 'Barry Allen' Flash persona come through (even if transformed)?
====
Barry Allen was a film projectionist at The Chicago Movie Theater during the Roaring Twenties who kept staring at rolling film-reel negatives in the glimmering light until it gave his brain a reflex and muscle-reactivity speed, causing him to develop a superhuman power over speed. Barry started calling himself the 'Flash' and sewed himself a nifty red acrobat's costume, intending to hit the streets of Chicago as its first super-vigilante. Crime bosses, ghouls, and wayward cops soon came to fear the Flash's presence and his ability to act very quickly before criminal activities could develop with sufficient speed.
The most frustrated character in this strange urban vigilantism drama in 1920s was the gangster Black Mask who managed an elaborate opium smuggling operation between Chicago (Illinois) and San Francisco (California). Black Mask feared the 'word-on-the-street' would be insulting nomenclature rebelliousness such as, "Black Mask is a snail compared to the Flash!" To counter this trend in Chicago 'street-culture,' Black Mask forced employees of the Chicago Herald newspaper to print special articles biased in favor of Black Mask and his opium operation, citing that the smuggling of 2nd-tier danger-drugs (especially opium) is simply not as morally dangerous as a rogue unlicensed 'vigilante' such as the Flash.
The smear campaign in the press worked for a while, and Flash suffered some morale blows, but over all, he decided that all that could be done was being done, and indeed, in time (one year), Flash's crusader-antics once again received due media attention, and the goonish crime-bosses and vandals of Chicago once again feared how he would 'dent' the 'iron-face' of their mystique with his speed-focused 'magic-exorcism.' The Flash (Barry Allen) took advantage of this special advantage to host a pirate radio show called "Anti-Mafia" which surprisingly generated a great deal of street-talk and satisfied his mission for 'urban dialogue proliferation.' Black Mask had had it; he ordered the assassination of Flash, and surprisingly, was killed by one of his own goons! Good marched over evil.
====
Flash (Wikipedia)
