Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters

[Marvolo]

Van Helsing was BETTER by this film than a lot. I'd say Van was 7/10. This film was 4.5/10. Without being R? I'd say neutered it's a 4/10. I'm surprised the trailer didn't trick some people from seeing through it. For me it's one of those fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me type deals... and I don't hate movies that often. I will say the trailer was edited MUCH better than the film itself. Also it's conversion 3D, I saw it in 2D if anyone was wondering - they may have added that after-the-fact.

Which screening were you at?

 

[O'Haire]

Looks so terrible I couldn't even finish the trailer.

 

[Superhero 101]

Looks okay reminds me a lot of Van Helsing

 

[Drizzle]

It looks better than the other fairy tale drivel crap they've been churning out lately, though that isn't saying much. They should just release it with an R rating. It's not like this is going to make much money regardless.

 

[Kane52630]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wr5vmbgq8c

[YT]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wr5vmbgq8c[/YT]

No words really.

But seriously, it's something I would probably see online if i'm in the right mood for it.

 

[Ultimatehero]

Which screening were you at?

October, I think...

Saw R rated.

Thomas Mann, I can say rules in it, although I think because he has more of a need to take it seriously.

Renner tried to save it too, but the role was ridiculous in a bad way - a junkie with a injecting sugar addiction.

Famke Jansen is hot, and believe me, like every other red blooded male - I had fantasies about her back in her XMen days. But still, I couldn't stand her in this.

The problem wasn't the effect it was the phoned in performances, pukeable art design, and no sense of what the tone is supposed to be.

Basically unless they reshot the whole thing, it doesn't seem like something that can be saved.

This is coming from a guy that RARELY dislikes a movie.

 

[Baramos]

Why do studios keep making movies like this? This is a rehash of a rehash. The Brothers Grimm? Van Helsing? Red Riding Hood? Do studios think we have a memory span of only one year? Bah, maybe most people do...

It doesn't help that it looks dorky as heck, besides. Hansel and Gretel dress like they came out of the Matrix. I don't think full-length black leather dusters were the norm in 17th century Germany. I think I've seen that anachronistic autocrossbow in about ten movies. The gatling gun? Man. And why are the witches also using autocrossbows and gatling guns? Shouldn't they be using mostly witchcraft or magic?

It just looks big, dumb, and loud. You can only go to the big-dumb-and-loud well so many times, Hollywood. I can only turn my brain off so many times a year. I think Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (man, they also kind of went ahead and copied that naming convention for this, didn't they?) was my limit for this movie season. Heck, I gave you guys a chance when I went to see Cowboys and Aliens last year and I ended up getting burned.

 

[Rowsdower!]

Looks like the bastard child of Jonah Hex and Van Helsing.

 

[mclay18]

It looks like dumb fun, but I'm approaching this with caution. Either way, Jeremy Renner should be thankful he's contracted for several more Marvel movies as well as potential Bourne Legacy sequels.

 

[Rowsdower!]

Jeremy Renner has his Oscar noms.

Now he has his Catwoman.

 

[Gianakin_]

Nice, another nail for Renner's career. Bet he won't be as critical of his Hawkeye role after that.

 

[chamber-music]

Looks like Matt Damon and Heath Ledgers the Brothers Grimm

 

[Liam_H]

We can now see why its been moved to January.To think Hollywood may try to spread some of their blockbusters out some more but nope same old reason.

 

[Octoberist]

I'm all for cheesy fun when it's done right. Here, it's like the director is nudging us on our ribs snickering. This looks awful.

 

[Rowsdower!]

Looks like Matt Damon and Heath Ledgers the Brothers Grimm

Only worse.

And I say that as someone who turned Brothers Grimm off about halfway through because it was awful.

 

[Octoberist]

Nice, another nail for Renner's career. Bet he won't be as critical of his Hawkeye role after that.

Damn what has he done to you?

Renner will be fine but I think Gemma needs a new agent.

 

[Marvolo]

Only worse.

And I say that as someone who turned Brothers Grimm off about halfway through because it was awful.

You bite your tongue!

 

[Gianakin_]

Damn what has he done to you?

Renner will be fine but I think Gemma needs a new agent.

I was being ironic, not content. It just seems that Renner ain't got it, acting or charisma-wise, to stand on his own 2 feet in Hollywood.

 

[rayc1971]

looks like van helsing meets snow white and the huntsman

 

[Octoberist]

I was being ironic, not content. It just seems that Renner ain't got it, acting or charisma-wise, to stand on his own 2 feet in Hollywood.

He should start playing Greek characters exclusively in spite of you!!! :0

 

[Gianakin_]

Sure, I've got a couple of roles in mind. They all die in the end, though.

 

[Octoberist]

Why do studios keep making movies like this? This is a rehash of a rehash. The Brothers Grimm? Van Helsing? Red Riding Hood? Do studios think we have a memory span of only one year? Bah, maybe most people do...

It doesn't help that it looks dorky as heck, besides. Hansel and Gretel dress like they came out of the Matrix. I don't think full-length black leather dusters were the norm in 17th century Germany. I think I've seen that anachronistic autocrossbow in about ten movies. The gatling gun? Man. And why are the witches also using autocrossbows and gatling guns? Shouldn't they be using mostly witchcraft or magic?

It just looks big, dumb, and loud. You can only go to the big-dumb-and-loud well so many times, Hollywood. I can only turn my brain off so many times a year. I think Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (man, they also kind of went ahead and copied that naming convention for this, didn't they?) was my limit for this movie season. Heck, I gave you guys a chance when I went to see Cowboys and Aliens last year and I ended up getting burned.

I'm all for escapist entertainment but Hollywood's 4 quad, bean counting method of greenlighitng movies based on branding has hit its apex.

Due to social media, the general public are more intuitive than ever when they see crap. People are getting jaded with Hollywood's genre movies. The system needs to change. Hell, TV destroys movies now. That's another sign right there.

 

[Gianakin_]

I'm sure this summer has gotten the message across.

 

[Octoberist]

I'm sure this summer has gotten the message across.

Yes it has!

Also, I really hope when people from Generation Y take over the studios, things will improve due to their upbringing and gnenral knowledge on Geek culture.

 

[dark_b]

could we call this steampunk?