I got scared ****less at the post office this morning

[terry78]

I go in early before work at about 6:30am to check my p.o. box, and while I'm getting my mail out, this old man comes from out of nowhere and comes up to me and says, "did you ever see that girl again?" I was like, "what?" He says, "did you ever see that girl again?" I say, "what girl?" Then he gives this creepy ass smile and says, "The one that thinks you're a paranoid schizophrenic." ....

I'm like, "nah, I haven't." Then I promptly close the box, and walk fast as hell out of the office without looking back. I swear this happened this morning, man. I'm still freaked out.

 

[jaguarr]

LOL! I like this story. I hope it becomes a recurring theme for you so I can hear more about it.

jag

 

[The Spawn]

Was he wearing a jeans jacket?

 

[Colossal Spoons]

Describe his beard...

 

[The Spawn]

Was is beardy?

 

[Immortalfire]

He's probably a Hypester.

 

[The Spawn]

A hyper one at that.

 

[Canadian Rider]

You should have said "Yes. I did. And she was spectacular!"

 

[The Spawn]

Very spectacular.

 

[Lightning Strykez!]

I go in early before work at about 6:30am to check my p.o. box, and while I'm getting my mail out, this old man comes from out of nowhere and comes up to me and says, "did you ever see that girl again?" I was like, "what?" He says, "did you ever see that girl again?" I say, "what girl?" Then he gives this creepy ass smile and says, "The one that thinks you're a paranoid schizophrenic." ....

I'm like, "nah, I haven't." Then I promptly close the box, and walk fast as hell out of the office without looking back. I swear this happened this morning, man. I'm still freaked out.

Ugh man. Ugh.

 

[The Spawn]

I think he died.

 

[chamber-music]

"did you ever see that girl again?" Sounds like a classic Beardo.

Was he wearing a trash bag and tissue boxes for shoes?

 

[Lurk]

Bah, that's nothing, the homeless would do that crap all the time where I grew up. It'd be funnier if you said "Yes! She went thataway!" or tried to convince him she was hiding from him.

 

[Showtime]

That's how horror movies start...

 

[Kool-Aid]

This "man" could have been a manifestation of your subconscious.

 

[Jspider13]

Maybe he was from the future?

 

[bulok]

sounds like the start of a great novel/movie

 

[Lackey]

It's obvious you've talked to this man before about an imaginary girl you made up, but you don't remember the girl or talking to the man because you're schizophrenic.

 

[Erzengel]

Yeah you aren't even on the internet now. Your staring into the microwave as you type on your imaginary keyboard.

 

[Lord Valumart]

sounds like the start of a great novel/movie

great

surely you mean substandard

 

[Superman4ever]

A beardo did that to me once. I was walking to class (this is like 3 years ago) and he comes up to me asking for change. I gave him like 3 dollars, but he doesn't leave me alone, he just follows me and starts chatting away...about how he's SUCH a ladies man. Anyways, I try to be as polite as possible, and then he looks at me, dead on...and he has this creepy look on his face, like he just had an epiphany or something. I'm looking back, and thinking to myself, "Oh ****!" And then I say, "What? What is it...?" He smiles and says, "You know what? You look exactly like I did when I was your age...its unreal." Forget the fact that he's black and I'm a light-colored Mid-Eastern. But at that moment, at that very moment, I noticed his tentacle like nose hairs. They seemed to be reaching out for me...I said, with a smirk, "OK, I gotta go!"

Ever since then, as part of my grooming ritual, I've plucked my nose hairs, just in case!

 

[AndThePickles]

Bwahaha. Old man.

 

[jaguarr]

A beardo did that to me once. I was walking to class (this is like 3 years ago) and he comes up to me asking for change. I gave him like 3 dollars, but he doesn't leave me alone, he just follows me and starts chatting away...about how he's SUCH a ladies man. Anyways, I try to be as polite as possible, and then he looks at me, dead on...and he has this creepy look on his face, like he just had an epiphany or something. I'm looking back, and thinking to myself, "Oh ****!" And then I say, "What? What is it...?" He smiles and says, "You know what? You look exactly like I did when I was your age...its unreal." Forget the fact that he's black and I'm a light-colored Mid-Eastern. But at that moment, at that very moment, I noticed his tentacle like nose hairs. They seemed to be reaching out for me...I said, with a smirk, "OK, I gotta go!"

Ever since then, as part of my grooming ritual, I've plucked my nose hairs, just in case!

I'm sorry. What were you saying? I got distracted by all that hair protruding from your nostrils.

jag

 

[The Spawn]

Was his name Tyler D?

 

[nosebleed.]

Man, that dude was just Doc Brown trying to give you a pair of nikes.