matrix_ghost
movie fan
- Joined
- Aug 19, 2004
- Messages
- 5,585
- Reaction score
- 3
- Points
- 58
10. Jolie & Aniston
You know you want to see this ****, especially if the movie is called CAT FIGHT! filmed entirely under those waterfalls above. Not only would this give "Entertainment Tonight" something to talk about for the next 17 years, the entire production of the film could be turned into a reality show where Brad Pitt hosts and periodically turns to the camera and says "I hit that."
9. Campbell & Combs
If this happened in the mid-eighties my brain might have exploded. Bruce Campbell (THE EVIL DEAD) and Jeffery Combs (RE-ANIMATOR) are both legendary b-movie heroes that tend to ***** things up the more and more they try to help. That comic above had me in a frenzy when I first heard about it but ended up disappointing when all was said and done. I need my horror icons live and in the flesh, covered in blood.
8. Pacino & Jackson
From the second the opening credits stop rolling, the yelling starts. Two hours of yelling. Pick a topic and have these two disagree about it and you'll have one of the most animated discussions of all time. You can throw in some mutated cats or mafia zombies or even a gay love triangle as a sub-plot, it all leads to more yelling. In the end, Christopher Walken walks in, shoots them both dead and starts dancing. Best. Movie. Ever.
7. Bellucci & Hayek
Doing **** like that above is uncalled-for and I apologize. To be honest though, if these two ever paired up there's a good chance I wouldn't understand a word of dialogue. I find accents too distracting and there's no way I'd be taking up screen space with sub-titles. The best way to get around this? No talking. That's right, I want Monica Bellucci and Salma Hayek to do a silent movie, telling a tale of seduction, betrayal, and lesbianism using nothing but physicality and body paints. Again, uncalled-for.
6. Ferrell & Carrey
Nobody has made me laugh more in the past 15 years than these two. They might cancel each other out. They might cause my death in a fit of uncontrollable hilarity. They might decide to do a drama. Whatever the case, get them in a movie together and let's see how it plays out. Chances are the studio wouldn't be able to afford any other cast so be prepared for a lot of scenes where Carrey talks out of his ass and Ferrell shows off that weird fat roll located down and to the right of his chest-afro.
5. Gervais & Pegg
The minds behind two of the greatest television achievements of all time (The Office, Spaced) need to hook up and show the rest of the world what is funny. I'll never understand how these garbage parody movies (EPIC MOVIE, MEET THE SPARTANS, DATE MOVIE) keep getting box office numbers while these two aren't even household names. I beg you to watch one episode of "Spaced" and/or "Extras" and then tell me who does it better.
4. Depp & Pitt
Tyler Durden vs. Edward Scissorhands, or some **** like that. It's no surprise that my wife came up with this entry. After immediate resentment and a half day of walking around the house with my gut sucked in I came to realize how cool this would be. Both will be 45 this year and are arguably at the pinnacle of their careers. Both are looking for their first Oscar. Both make women wetter than a 12 hour bath. They (we) deserve their HEAT moment.
3. Washington & Clooney
Those are two cool muther*****ers right there. From what I hear this would be a hell of a basketball game too. Don't fool yourself though, I'll hoop both these *****es. Ahem, fact is, these are two of the finest actors I'll ever get to watch. Denzel's turn in GLORY just might be the greatest performance I'll ever see and George cemented me as a fan as far back as FROM DUSK TILL DAWN. Let's get them together and have at the friendly competition. First one to the Oscar wins.
2. Alba & Biel
That's it. That's the movie right there. Two Jessica's talking about their day as they tan their asses. You could film it all in one shot, Christ, you don't even have to move the camera. Actually, turn it into a documentary with a voice over by Morgan Freeman describing the wonders of perfectly tanned buttocks. Release it exclusively at IMAX in 3D so we feel like we're sitting at the pool with them. Why has nobody thought of this? I'm easily the smartest, or the most offensive guy I know.
1. Schwarzenegger & Stallone
Get it over with before one of them dies. Sly has proved he's still got what it takes. Arnie's political career might finally be coming to an end in a couple years so if he starts working out now he should be able to be half as big as he once was. Somebody write a script where lot's of bad guys need to die and something blows up every ten minutes. Six lines of dialogue, four music montages, one hottie, and a legendary fight scene. Done and done.
You know you want to see this ****, especially if the movie is called CAT FIGHT! filmed entirely under those waterfalls above. Not only would this give "Entertainment Tonight" something to talk about for the next 17 years, the entire production of the film could be turned into a reality show where Brad Pitt hosts and periodically turns to the camera and says "I hit that."
9. Campbell & Combs
If this happened in the mid-eighties my brain might have exploded. Bruce Campbell (THE EVIL DEAD) and Jeffery Combs (RE-ANIMATOR) are both legendary b-movie heroes that tend to ***** things up the more and more they try to help. That comic above had me in a frenzy when I first heard about it but ended up disappointing when all was said and done. I need my horror icons live and in the flesh, covered in blood.
8. Pacino & Jackson
From the second the opening credits stop rolling, the yelling starts. Two hours of yelling. Pick a topic and have these two disagree about it and you'll have one of the most animated discussions of all time. You can throw in some mutated cats or mafia zombies or even a gay love triangle as a sub-plot, it all leads to more yelling. In the end, Christopher Walken walks in, shoots them both dead and starts dancing. Best. Movie. Ever.
7. Bellucci & Hayek
Doing **** like that above is uncalled-for and I apologize. To be honest though, if these two ever paired up there's a good chance I wouldn't understand a word of dialogue. I find accents too distracting and there's no way I'd be taking up screen space with sub-titles. The best way to get around this? No talking. That's right, I want Monica Bellucci and Salma Hayek to do a silent movie, telling a tale of seduction, betrayal, and lesbianism using nothing but physicality and body paints. Again, uncalled-for.
6. Ferrell & Carrey
Nobody has made me laugh more in the past 15 years than these two. They might cancel each other out. They might cause my death in a fit of uncontrollable hilarity. They might decide to do a drama. Whatever the case, get them in a movie together and let's see how it plays out. Chances are the studio wouldn't be able to afford any other cast so be prepared for a lot of scenes where Carrey talks out of his ass and Ferrell shows off that weird fat roll located down and to the right of his chest-afro.
5. Gervais & Pegg
The minds behind two of the greatest television achievements of all time (The Office, Spaced) need to hook up and show the rest of the world what is funny. I'll never understand how these garbage parody movies (EPIC MOVIE, MEET THE SPARTANS, DATE MOVIE) keep getting box office numbers while these two aren't even household names. I beg you to watch one episode of "Spaced" and/or "Extras" and then tell me who does it better.
4. Depp & Pitt
Tyler Durden vs. Edward Scissorhands, or some **** like that. It's no surprise that my wife came up with this entry. After immediate resentment and a half day of walking around the house with my gut sucked in I came to realize how cool this would be. Both will be 45 this year and are arguably at the pinnacle of their careers. Both are looking for their first Oscar. Both make women wetter than a 12 hour bath. They (we) deserve their HEAT moment.
3. Washington & Clooney
Those are two cool muther*****ers right there. From what I hear this would be a hell of a basketball game too. Don't fool yourself though, I'll hoop both these *****es. Ahem, fact is, these are two of the finest actors I'll ever get to watch. Denzel's turn in GLORY just might be the greatest performance I'll ever see and George cemented me as a fan as far back as FROM DUSK TILL DAWN. Let's get them together and have at the friendly competition. First one to the Oscar wins.
2. Alba & Biel
That's it. That's the movie right there. Two Jessica's talking about their day as they tan their asses. You could film it all in one shot, Christ, you don't even have to move the camera. Actually, turn it into a documentary with a voice over by Morgan Freeman describing the wonders of perfectly tanned buttocks. Release it exclusively at IMAX in 3D so we feel like we're sitting at the pool with them. Why has nobody thought of this? I'm easily the smartest, or the most offensive guy I know.
1. Schwarzenegger & Stallone
Get it over with before one of them dies. Sly has proved he's still got what it takes. Arnie's political career might finally be coming to an end in a couple years so if he starts working out now he should be able to be half as big as he once was. Somebody write a script where lot's of bad guys need to die and something blows up every ten minutes. Six lines of dialogue, four music montages, one hottie, and a legendary fight scene. Done and done.
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