Odd but humourous things you have witnessed/heard.

[The Amazing Lee]

There are many wierd people out there, some more wierd than you'll ever imagine.

One thing that sticks out in my mind is that my girlfriend told me that when she was in her college class they kept having announcements every now and again saying for the person who kept sh**ting in the bins to stop.

I thought that was hilarious....but very strange.

 

[Darkdd]

When i was watching the news yesterday,they were talking about problems in schools and showing file footage of studentts.This clip comes up with three girls walking down the street and one of them trips, then she's like "What d f**k girl.Look meh f****in slippers buss!" I almost died, The look the anchorwoman had on her face was priceless.



PS:The dialogue is in my local dialect in case you were wondering...

 

[unstoppable]

i hate to say it but i have watched yu-gi-oh gx before and there's an episode i'll never forget

one guy was getting kicked out of the school when he said "you can't kick me out i have a gift" and they asked him what the gift was he said "my cards talk to me" i died laughing

yugioh is only good when your making in fun of it

 

[Equint77]

migrants.... this mexican family who migrated around the US looking for work only to ruin companies and farms due to illegal child labor....such as this huge farm who lost their contract with Heinz... then using the kids supersoaker to fix their van.... and then after a long trip returning to their home..only to find out it was robbed.

I shouldn't have laughed when I saw it on TV... but watching that entire thing.. I thought... god damn... how much bad luck can you have.

 

[Ben Urich]

During my first week of college I was just walking around and I saw these two guys say "Hey!" to each other and they waved and then one of them said "Thanks for the add!"

t:

 

[Hades]

Well one time, Everything was all fuzzy and blurry, and my friend got up really quickly, and then he started climbing this big pole, but while he was doing it he slowly morhped into garfield, and he just..drooped down on his feet like a feather. Then he laughed like a walruss.

 

[ampersand]

There's some guy named Doug who goes to my school that's been here for 7 years. He goes around fighting people with lightsabers during the day and is known to randomly go to waterpolo and rugby practice although he isn't on either team. The other day he stole a sandwich from a girl walking to class.

Here are some videos of his antics:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5n29m_sEuqQ
http://www51.homepage.villanova.edu/sean.donovan/Doug Does a Keg Stand.avi

 

[The IronMan]

I was in charge of a bunch of iron workers on a new court house building in connecticut.We were about 175' or so in the mechanical floor.On every other floor was a porta john that had to be lowered to the ground once a week for cleaning(the masons were responsible for this.)After one month of this thing not being cleaned,it was pretty ripe not to mentionreally FULL.One day they decide to lower it to the ground through the empty elevator shaft that had a temporary hoist in it.they attached a strap to eye hooks in the side of the PLASTIC porta john.IT got lifted off the floor just fine swung in to the elevator shaft,back across the floor. back into the elevator shaft and thats when..... the lifting eyes ripped out of the sides and there was a 350# crap missle on 175' plunge.It hit the bottom of the elevator shaft and just exploded there was crap toilet paper blue liquid and plastic eveywhere.It still to this day one of the most funny things that I have ever seen on a job site

 

[Bat Attack]

There was this one girl in second grade who purposley **** her pants and wiped it all over the bathroom and was just laughing about it and swearing at the teachers.

 

[The Question]

Earlier today, my and my friends were playing foursquare. We were looking around for a ball, and thought there might be one in the very large collection of bushes on our school's campus. We sent one of my friends in to look for balls, and all the while made very crude jokes about testicles. Finally, one of my friends said "Do you have any balls?," and by friends looking in the bush said "Yes I have balls, but they're not in this bush." It was awesome. We laughed for about a minute.

 

[tzarinna]

I was standing in line at McDonald's for breakfast and some guy was having a fit because he wanted his eggs scrambled like in the picture on the wall with cheese. Not folded,like they acutally cook the eggs. The place was packed and he was very insistent.

It's not like the place is a diner and you have trained cooks in the back. WTF

 

[Ice Monkey Joe]

A man came to my door on halloween with a condom over his head. He stole the candy bowl but left all the candy.

 

[Iceman]

Re: Odd but humourous things you have witnessed/heard.

The other day some guy said that you'd never had a drink.

 

[Darkdd]

i hate to say it but i have watched yu-gi-oh gx before and there's an episode i'll never forget

one guy was getting kicked out of the school when he said "you can't kick me out i have a gift" and they asked him what the gift was he said "my cards talk to me" i died laughing

yugioh is only good when your making in fun of it

Oh i know.My friends and I almost died laughing at a "monster" that was really just a girl in a raincoat and a panty.t: :meow:

 

[Gimpy]

I love the moments on the Dataline special reports were the Sex-offenders say that they have seen the prior shows, but they still show up to have sex with a teen boy or girl. That is funny.
The one that I have to say is that I have never had the Wisconsin Cheese soup at work because I don't eat pork ( They is ham and celery in the soup ), that gets a lot of strangle looks, so I have to explain, or the vegaterian vegatable(Duh).

 

[The Shredder]

A former co-worker of mine called up his father on his cell, and then proceeded to cuss him out, and pretty much call him every name in the book about some keys that he just knew his father lost somewhere. Turns out the keys in question were right by the guy's car. Apparently they fell out of his pocket when he got out of his car. I dont remember him calling back his father to apologize either.

 

[heypapajinx]

i once saw a drunk homeless guy push his drunk homeless girlfriend in front of a car. only her leg got run over. the girl driving was a college kid and she totally panicked. she was just about to get out of the car and check on the lady when the lady jumped up and started banging on her window and kicking her car saying "hey!!! watch where you're going lady!!!". it was flippn hilarious cus the girl got back in her car and locked the door!!

 

[Addendum]

Last year on the Howard Stern show, Artie told the funniest Ash Wednesday story ever.

Artie and his buddy would bet on sports. His friend found out that the scores for the early hockey games would appear in the evening paper. By the time the evening paper would come out, it would be time to place bets with their bookie. So his buddy would bet on the games that had already finished, essentially ripping off their bookie. This lasted for about a month. The go-between for the bookie called them and said that the bookie, whom they never talked to face-to-face wanted to talk to them. They went to the local McDonalds and went to a corner booth. This big Italian fellow then sits down across from them. He said "If I ever see another $1,000 parley on a ****ing Vancouver Canucks game, I will kidnap your family and ****ing kill them in front of you and then slit your ****ing throat" and other such threats. Artie and his buddy noticed that this fellow still had his ash cross on his forehead. They kept a straight face during the meeting, and then when he left they burst out laughing thinking about this guy leaving the house earlier in the day, and his wife says "Don't forget to stop by the church and get blessed"

 

[SpideyInATree]

Well one time, Everything was all fuzzy and blurry, and my friend got up really quickly, and then he started climbing this big pole, but while he was doing it he slowly morhped into garfield, and he just..drooped down on his feet like a feather. Then he laughed like a walruss.

Sounds to me like there were some acid hits involved there.

An odd but funny thing that sticks out in my mind at the moment is when my one friend and I were walking through downtown Pittsburgh on our way to the CIVIC ARENA (not the Mellon Arena, F--- Mellon) this older gentleman, about in his late 50's, early 60's, stops us and tells us that he's from the future.

Now you'd expect him to be a homeless guy or something but the dude was in a very nice looking suit, was drinking a coffee, and oddly enough he sort of looked a lot like Larry David from Curb your Enthusiasm. He kept telling my friend and I that we'd play key roles in the reformation of the planet Earth once the nuclear war between America and it's enemies has ceased.

That wasn't really funny but it got funny when after he walked away from us he tripped over a crack in the sidewalk and fell down. It's always funny when old people fall down.

 

[TrailerCues]

At least one thing I would chooes is Internet Message Boards

 

[StrainedEyes]

Me and my girlfriend were on the NJ Transit train going to NYC. And behind us were two girls, one was on the phone talking really loud. She was going on and on about whatever and finally hung and and started talking to her friend next to her. After a few comments, she told her friend "I think I just pee'd alittle."

Twas quite odd.