Post Here To Find Out What Your Totem Is

[Dew k. Mosi]

Your natural enemy is Meryl Streep.

jag

I ****ing knew it. Stupid *****!!!

 

[R0rschach]

 

[jaguarr]

in before the lock!? for the knives!?!

DV8, The Spirits find your whimsical outlook on life amusing. They want you to know that your totem is the baby hippopotamus:

You are naturally curious, love the water and tend to eat a lot of mud. You rarely stray far from your mother's side and still prefer to breastfeed, even though most of your friends quit doing that twenty years ago. You are playful and mild-tempered and make very strange noises. The Egyptians revered you as a god. Your natural enemy is the crocodile.

jag

 

[DV8]

DV8, The Spirits find your whimsical outlook on life amusing. They want you to know that your totem is the baby hippopotamus:

You are naturally curious, love the water and tend to eat a lot of mud. You rarely stray far from your mother's side and still prefer to breastfeed, even though most of your friends quit doing that twenty years ago. You are playful and mild-tempered and make very strange noises. The Egyptians revered you as a god. Your natural enemy is the crocodile.

jag

THAT MAKES SOOOO MUCH SENSE!!!

Spoiler

are you saying I'm fat?

 

[Lightning Strykez!]

Okay....please indulge me, and tell me how terrible I am. I already know my soul is black.

 

[Drakon]

Same gag, you're faster. Your Google-Fu is astounding. /bow

 

[jaguarr]

Tat me!

nosebleed, The Spirits have proclaimed you a great healer among your people, the leeches!

Your natural thirst for blood translates to a great future in medicine. You will heal many, many people so as long as they will allow you to drink their blood. You often attach yourself to people without their knowledge or consent, however, which has resulted in them putting out lit cigarettes out on you to get you to let go. This will be a theme for you throughout your life. You are a creature who enjoys a simple existence, needing not for the finer things in life. You enjoy swimming a great deal. Your natural enemy are forceps.

jag

 

[JP]

This reminds me. I should make a "post here to be banned" thread, just for people to post and be banned

Sounds like a party.

 

[Superman79]

Sign me up, this could be interesting....

 

[jaguarr]

Ooo, I want my totem!

AndThePickles, I am please to inform you that you are a favorite of The Spirits. They are delighted to inform you that your totem is the sable:

You are widely regarded as luxurious and beautiful. People want to wear you as a coat. You are playful and curious with an acute sense of smell and hearing. You are known to hide in your den for days on end without every coming out, usually surrounded by candy wrappers and microwave popcorn bags. You have a very musky odor that is irresistible to some, but highly offensive to others. You are a fierce fighter and your favorite meal is squirrel. Your natural enemies are Lewis and Clark:

jag

 

[Logan's Runt]

Oooh... take my soul, Jag!

 

[AndThePickles]

AndThePickles, I am please to inform you that you are a favorite of The Spirits. They are delighted to inform you that your totem is the sable:

You are widely regarded as luxurious and beautiful. People want to wear you as a coat. You are playful and curious with an acute sense of smell and hearing. You are known to hide in your den for days on end without every coming out, usually surrounded by candy wrappers and microwave popcorn bags. You have a very musky odor that is irresistible to some, but highly offensive to others. You are a fierce fighter and your favorite meal is squirrel. Your natural enemies are Lewis and Clark:

jag

"People want to wear you as a coat"

Hahahaha

 

[jaguarr]

Is my inner animal a chicken or a duck?


egg

eggyman, The Spirits are fully confused by your existence, for you are a platypus:

No one is really sure what to make of you. You even confuse yourself. You have trouble making up your mind and often try to be much more than you really are. You are prone to storing fat in your tail and capable of producing a nasty venom when provoked. Mostly, though, you are a very solitary, peaceful creature who prefers not to be bothered by humans. Your natural enemy is the goanna.

jag

 

[Eggyman]

eggyman, The Spirits are fully confused by your existence, for you are a platypus:

No one is really sure what to make of you. You even confuse yourself. You have trouble making up your mind and often try to be much more than you really are. You are prone to storing fat in your tail and capable of producing a nasty venom when provoked. Mostly, though, you are a very solitary, peaceful creature who prefers not to be bothered by humans. Your natural enemy is the goanna.

jag

Normally when someone does something for me I say 'thank you' . . . but this time I'm not so sure . . .

Oh well, thanks.

 

[Jack Rabbit]

These are turning out great...t:

 

[BRUTAL]

What am I, Chopped Liver?!

 

[kytrigger]

Oh great and wise Jaguarr, what is my totem?

 

[nosebleed.]

nosebleed, The Spirits have proclaimed you a great healer among your people, the leeches!

Your natural thirst for blood translates to a great future in medicine. You will heal many, many people so as long as they will allow you to drink their blood. You often attach yourself to people without their knowledge or consent, however, which has resulted in them putting out lit cigarettes out on you to get you to let go. This will be a theme for you throughout your life. You are a creature who enjoys a simple existence, needing not for the finer things in life. You enjoy swimming a great deal. Your natural enemy are forceps.

jag

I don't even know how to feel about that.

I for damn sure am not going to get a tat of a leech

 

[jaguarr]

Oh, **** yes.

Thread of the month.

Jack Rabbit, The Great Spirit himself has sent this salutation to you from way on high, your totem is the giraffe:

Your height is both your greatest asset and your biggest drawback. People find it very difficult to sneak up on you because you always see them coming. You LIVE to trample the life out of lions. You are probably a vegetarian and if are not then you are widely regarded as a deviant by the other giraffes. Women show great interest in you, but it's not for what you think, so be careful:

Your love life motto is "bro's before ho's" but an older woman can have her way with you however she damn well pleases. You live amongst men but secretly yearn to be subjugated by a strong matriarch who will bend you to her will. Most young male giraffes feel this way, but never discuss it with one another. Your natural enemy is Marlin Perkins.

jag

 

[fangrl06]

Nice thread, jag!t:

 

[Jack Rabbit]

I've gotten the giraffe thing before.

I was hoping for something more insightful.

 

[Drakon]

What am I, Chopped Liver?!

No, you're further back in line.

 

[DarthRekal]

this thread = teh dopeness!

what happens when he gets EVERYONE though

 

[jaguarr]

I'm with Dew.. I'm in this for the Sharp Shoes.

BRUTAL, The Spirits admire you and want me to open a can of tuna to tell you that you are an orange tabby housecat:

You are very selective about who you will give your trust and love to, but once you do you do it fully. To everyone else you are cynical and distrusting. When you are mad at people you poop on their pillow and destroy their couch. You rarely flush the toilet and are demanding, wanting what you want when you want it. A ball of yarn can keep you entertained for hours. You show great athletic prowess and agility and have a propensity for landing on your feet. If it's sunny out, you are worthless, preferring to lay and bask in it's rays rather than do anything productive.

jag

 

[BRUTAL]

No, you're further back in line.

I'm going to sick my termites on your leg.